AN: I keep thanking you all for your amazing reviews, but I still think it amazing that so many people like this story, so THANKS!
I am very sorry that this is such a short chapter, but it refused to grow any longer, and it didn't fit anywhere else. So I'm just putting it up like this ;) Hope you still like Caroline... Enjoy!
Dear Diary,
It's Monday. I'm home from school because I'm suffering the aftermath of the worst hangover of my life. I'm never drinking that stuff again!
Saturday was only two days ago, but it feels like an eternity has passed since then. It just doesn't seem possible that everything changed so much in such a short period of time!
In all honesty, my head is still spinning from discovering the true state of my heart. I was even wondering if I dreamed it… or if I was hallucinating under the influence of the alcohol. But I'm totally sober now and nothing has changed.
Stefan is still gone.
I'm still in love with Damon. Hopelessly, head-over-heels in love with Damon.
And I haven't told him yet.
Honestly? I've never been so scared! These feelings for Damon… How can they be so strong? I'm afraid of losing myself in him. Isn't it ironic? I'm in love with a vampire, and I'm not scared that he will lose control; I'm afraid that I will! It's too sudden and too much; I have to get a grip on this before I tell Damon how I feel.
Besides which, I think I owe it to Stefan to talk to him first. I need to clear the rubble before building. God. There's another reason to be scared. I'm loath to hurt Stefan. I'm afraid he's going to be devastated. Or maybe not? After all, he's pushed me into recognizing some basic truths about myself. Does he know me so much better than I know myself then? That's actually kind of frightening too!
So maybe this isn't going to come as such a surprise to him.
Still, I'm going to have to tell him that I've fallen for his brother right under his nose. That's going to be hard, no matter that he may be expecting it. I never intended to hurt Stefan like that. But there's no way to tell him without hurting him.
A tear splashed down on the paper, making the ink run out. While she wiped at it ineffectively, the letters started blurring before her eyes, and she buried her head in her pillow, more tears stinging her eyes. How she wished Damon was with her now. She wanted to snuggle up to him, pull him close. She wanted to kiss him senseless.
Her eyes drifted shut and she slept.
On Tuesday morning, Elena was intentionally trying to avoid running into Caroline. So of course Caroline was the very first person she bumped into when she arrived at school.
"Hey, Elena!" Caroline chirped, sounding her usual chipper self. "We missed you in class yesterday! I suppose you had better things to do?"
Elena fidgeted uncomfortably, "I had a headache. I stayed in bed all day," she replied, and that wasn't even a lie.
"Dammit," Caroline sounded slightly disappointed, and when Elena looked puzzled at Caroline for her strange reaction, she added, "It's just that me and Bonnie had a wager going. And I guess I lost: Bonnie thought you were sick."
"A wager? About me?" Elena said indignantly, "And what did you figure I was doing?"
Caroline smiled sheepishly, "I figured you were having some steamy supernatural sex and didn't feel like interrupting that to attend boring history on a Monday morning… "
Elena's eyes widened, and Caroline added defensively, "Hey, you and Stefan were both conspicuously absent, so you can't blame me for thinking you two were playing kissing games, right?"
Elena evaded Caroline's eyes: there had been kissing games all right, just not with Stefan...
To her great chagrin, Caroline noticed her high color and snickered, "Aha, so you did get some action this weekend!"
"Whether or not I had some 'action', as you put it, is none of your business, Caroline," Elena said tersely.
"Oh, come on now, Elena! Don't be such a spoilsport!" Caroline wasn't fazed by Elena's obvious irritation, "You're my friend. You're supposed to tell me stuff like that! Was it good?" She raised one eyebrow suggestively.
Elena felt a telling blush creep over her cheeks and said truthfully, "It was earth-shattering. Now can you please just drop it?"
Caroline pouted sulkily, but then her eyes lit up as she remembered she had something to tell Elena. She perked up and said, "Well, if we can't talk about you getting it on with Stefan, let's talk about Damon!"
Elena looked up in alarm, but luckily Caroline seemed oblivious this time; she was clearly bursting with news.
"I got a phone call from Damon…" Caroline announced, immediately getting Elena's full attention.
"Why would Damon call you?" Elena said in surprise.
Caroline looked slightly taken aback at Elena's strange reaction.
"Elena? Is something the matter?" Finally Caroline had caught on to Elena's discomfiture.
Elena waved her hand, trying to appear casual, "No, no, nothing. So, Damon called you, huh?"
Caroline looked suspiciously at her for a moment longer, a worried frown creasing her forehead. Then her usual ebullience popped up again, and her voice rose with her enthusiasm when she gushed, "Yes! And he had the most wonderful idea. Apparently he knows a great bar, and he wants us to go there with him!"
Elena looked nonplussed for a moment, "What? Damon knows a bar? I imagine he knows a lot of bars. What's so special about this one?"
Caroline huffed reproachfully, "Well, Elena, if you wouldn't keep interrupting me," Elena raised her eyebrows at this point, but Caroline ignored her and went on, "I could tell you."
Elena made a zipping motion with her hand in front of her mouth, indicating she'd keep mum.
"It's a bar where they do a salsa night once a month. They turn the whole bar into some kind of salsa café and have a salsa band playing all night. We could go there and practice! Sounds great, huh?" Caroline looked at Elena expectantly.
"Great," Elena muttered weakly.
Caroline went right on, "So, it's only this Wednesday. I'm totally in a tizzy about what I'm going to wear! I might even have to go and buy something new this afternoon!"
Elena's eyes widened, "Wednesday? But… that's… tomorrow?"
Caroline nodded enthusiastically, "Yup. Oh, I think it's so neat that he invited us along! We're going to have so much fun!"
Well, at least somebody will, Elena thought sourly.
When Elena came back in her room that night, there was something lying on her pillow. She approached it circumspectly, wary of things that suddenly appeared on her bed.
It was a single long-stemmed rose, its color a deep ruby red, so dark as to be almost purple, its delicate leaves just slightly unfurled. She picked it up and lifted it to her nose, inhaling its subtly fragrant aroma.
Underneath it was a folded piece of paper…
AN: Who knows... If I get enough incentives, I might post the next chapter sooner than Thursday ;)
