A/N: Hello to all my lovely, loyal, and patient readers. I am so sorry for the delay. I know you have all been waiting for this chapter since the story started, so I am super sorry for making you wait so long. Sadly, life got in the way and I haven't had time to write. I finally had some free time and was able to sit down and write. It may have taken a few tries, but I think I finally captured the emotions Tris is feeling just right. I hope you enjoy and thank you all for reading. Disclaimer: I do not own Divergent because Veronica Roth does. I also do not own Warrior by Demi Lovato.
Chapter 28
(Tris' POV)
"I asked you a question." I state angrily, crossing my arms across my chest, making sure my anger and annoyance is evident.
"Umm, I'm just going to go." Zeke states awkwardly, standing up and heading for the door.
"That is probably a good idea, Ezekiel." I bite out bitterly, causing him to physically flinch.
"Tris, just, please hear him out." Zeke says remorsefully before exiting the room, leaving me alone with Tobias.
"Tris, maybe you should sit down." Tobias states timidly, pointing to the now vacant seat next to him.
"Fine," I huff out, walking over and plopping down into the chair. "Now will you tell what the hell you and Zeke were talking about?"
"I promise I will explain everything, but first I need you to know something." Tobias states nervously, reaching out and grabbing my hands in his, squeezing a little tighter than normal.
"Okay, I'm listening." I reply as calmly as I possibly can.
"I need you to know that I love you more than anything in this world. I love you to the point where it consumes me. Every second of every day I think about you and just how lucky I am to have someone as amazing and wonderful and caring and loving as you. I don't know what I would do if I didn't have you in my life. Ever since you walked into my world, my life has changed so much. I have become the best version of myself because of you. You push me to be a better artist and a better man. You bring out the best in me and I am so grateful for that and everything else you have done for me. I would do anything for you and the last thing I ever want to do is hurt you." Tobias explains, his voice almost pleading, like he needs me to know all this in order to stay breathing.
"Tobias, you are really worrying me." I reply, worry and confusion washes over me. Why does he need me to know all this? Why does his voice sound so full of pain? Is this plan of his so bad that he thinks I will dump him?
"Please, just remember how much I love you and hold onto everything I just told you." Tobias states, his eyes pleading with me.
"Tobias, what is going on here?" I question confused.
"Do you love me?" Tobias bluntly asks.
"Of course I do. Why would you even ask me that?" I reply firmly.
"Can you please say the words?" Tobias timidly asks, bowing his head a little. I reach out and lightly touch his cheek, rubbing my thumb back and forth slightly. I feel him lean into my touch and a small smile ghosts over my face.
"Tobias Eaton, I love you. I love you more than I ever thought was possible. You are everything I have ever wanted and everything I never knew I needed. You mean the world to me and I don't think I would be about to breathe without you in my life." I state reassuringly.
"Thank you." Tobias whispers out, letting out a sigh of relief.
"Please tell me what is going on. I'm really scarred." I state.
"Okay, but please just hold onto what I told you and what you just said. Remember how much I love you and how much you love me." Tobias pleads.
"Okay, I promise." I reply reassuringly.
"Okay, so the plan Zeke and I were talking about is, well, kind of complicated and majorly stupid. I regret the fact that I even came up with it every, single, day. Well, no, that isn't completely true. I mean if I had never came up with the plan I never would have been given the chance to fall in love you with, but that still doesn't make what I planned on doing even remotely okay." Tobias rambles out nervously.
"Tobias, you aren't making any sense. What does this plan have to do with us getting together or you being able to fall in love with me?" I question confused.
"I guess I should just start explaining from the beginning." Tobias replies, letting out a giant sigh.
"That would probably be helpful." I state, a hint of amusement in my voice. I know I shouldn't be finding his nervous rambling amusing, but it is very rare that I get to see Tobias so flustered and I have to admit, it is kind of cute to see him like this.
"Okay, so a little over six months ago things weren't going as well as I wanted them to be going for the band. Back then, and you probably already know this but I'll say it anyway, I was a major asshole who only cared about success and being the best. I wanted my band to be the number one artist in the world and I would do anything in my power to make that happen, even if it meant hurting someone else." Tobias explains, his voice void of all emotion.
"I knew you were an asshole back then, but you aren't that guy anymore. You are sweet and caring and the best guy a girl could ask for." I state, interrupting him.
"But I wasn't that sweet and caring guy back then. If I had been I never would have come up with the plan." Tobias replies, shaking his head, obviously disapproving of his past behavior.
"Okay, so what was the plan?" I question nervously.
"Well, like I said the band wasn't doing as good as I wanted it to be and for the longest time I couldn't figure out why. Our record sells were higher than they had ever been and we had more fans than we ever thought was possible, but none of that mattered because we weren't number one on any of the charts. We weren't even the number one artist being talked about on any social media site or anything having to do with music. I soon realized that all of that belonged to someone else. Someone who was a brand new artist, who just appeared out of nowhere and stole everything away from me and the band. Then, that artist started to get even more attention after they covered one of my songs and their album went platinum." Tobias explains, looking at the floor to hide his face from me.
"You mean me, don't you?" I question, already knowing the answer.
"I was so furious that you were stealing all of the attention away from me and the band that I decided to do something about it. I wanted to be on top and I knew that would never happen if you were still in the business. I wanted to knock you off the pedestal the world had put you on. I wanted to watch you crash and burn and lose every ounce of wanting to be in this business, and I knew exactly how to do that." Tobias continues, his voice starting to strain with each word, making it obvious that he is trying to hide his real emotions.
"Wait, you wanted what? You hated the fact that you weren't number one so much that you were willing to…do what exactly? I get that you wanted me out of the business, but how the hell did you plan on doing that?" I question, anger starting to rise up inside of me. "I understand that you were a self-absorbed, asshole back then, but I never thought you would go to such extremes to get what you wanted." I state, a hint of bitterness in my voice.
"Well, I did go to such extremes to get what I wanted. I decided that I needed to do something about you and so I came up with a plan to destroy you. I needed to destroy you to such an extreme that you never wanted to write music or sing again. I knew you had gone through a hard breakup based on your music, so I figured you were still pretty broken down and damaged from that if you were still singing about it. With that in mind," Tobias stops, abruptly standing up, causing me to jump a little. He lets out a frustrated sigh, bringing his hands behind his head as he lowers it so I can't see his face. He takes a deep breath before continuing. "I figured out the best way to destroy you was to make you fall in love with me, and I mean deeply, madly in love with me, and then break up with you, making sure you knew that I never once cared about you." Tobias rapidly blurts out.
"What!?" I shout, practically jumping out of my seat in anger, causing Tobias to flinch and back away from me.
"Tris, please just let me explain everything before you get too angry to listen." Tobias pleads, but I ignore, lost in my own thoughts.
"So, you mean that everything that has happened between us these past six months was some elaborate plan to get me to fall madly, deeply in love you so you could just dump me and destroy me in order to get your fucking band back on top? Who the hell even comes up with such a sadistic, mind-fuck of a plan? I mean, seriously you have to be fucked up in the head to think messing with someone like that just for the sake of being on top on some dumb ass music charts is okay. But then again, seeing who your father is, it makes perfect sense that you could be so fucking sadistic." I bite out, completely disgusted by what he just told me.
"Seriously, low blow with the father comment, but then again, I completely deserve it. You are completely right. I was a sadistic asshole back then, but that isn't me anymore." Tobias states, his voice full of pain and sorrow.
"Bullshit! You are the same guy you were when you came up with this fucked up plan. No one just changes over night like you claim you have. And even if you have changed, than why the hell are we still dating? I mean, I was head over heels in love with you months ago, so why didn't you break up with me back then? Why the fuck are we still together?" I shout, my voice wavering towards the end. I bite my lip as the familiar sting of tears builds in my eyes, but I will them to not fall. I will not give him the satisfaction of knowing just how hurt I am.
"Well if you would have just let me explain you would already know the answers to those questions." Tobias replies harshly.
"Fine, then please, fucking explain yourself." I bite out, crossing my arms over my chest.
"When I first approached you about going out, I was only doing it to get the plan to happen, but once we started to hang out and I got to know the real you, everything changed. The more I got to know you, the more I realized that you were someone I could really fall for. I had never once thought about falling in love, but with you I couldn't not think about it. I tried to keep my feelings in check for the sake of my plan, but that didn't last long. I knew my feelings were starting to grow for you after the night at the Pier and from there, they just grew like a wildfire until I was so deeply in love with you that I couldn't stop it even if I wanted to. I fell for you hard and I didn't, and still don't, want to lose you. I gave up on the plan a long time ago because being in love with you is the most important thing in the world to me." Tobias explains whole-heartedly.
"I don't believe you." I reply, my voice cracking as I feel the first tears slip from my eyes.
"Tris, you have to believe me. Remember what I told you before all of this. Remember how much I love you and how much you love me. Please, you have to believe me." Tobias pleads, taking a few steps towards me, his hand reached out to touch me, but I step back and put my hands up to keep him away.
"Don't you dare touch me." I state as firmly as possible through the now streaming tears.
"Please, Tris, I love you. You have to know that I'm telling you the truth when I say that." Tobias begs, his voice starting to waiver some. I glance up at him and notice a slight shimmer in his eyes where the tears are starting to pool.
"How the hell am I supposed to know what is real and what is just some part of your plan? How the hell do I know that you really love me? Everything we have been through and everything I feel for you is based on a lie. So why the hell would I believe you when you say you love me?" I question through the tears.
"I know you are hurt right now and I get that, but please hear me when I say that I love you. I don't give a damn about my stupid plan and I sure as hell don't give a damn about if the band is number one or not. All I care about is you. I would give up everything I have just to make you believe me when I say I love you. What can I do to make you believe me?" Tobias questions, a few tears escaping his eyes.
"I don't think there is anything you can do to make me believe you. Not after everything you have just told me." I state, shaking my head.
"Tris, I need you to believe me. I don't think I will be able to survive without you. I love you so much. You are my whole world and I can't lose you." Tobias replies, his tears now rolling down his face freely. He takes a step towards me but I move away again.
"Just stop." I shout, my voice cracking as more tears start to fall. "Stop saying you love me and that I'm your world, because I don't believe you. No one can love someone like you claim you do and do what you were doing. It isn't possible."
"But I wasn't going to go through with the plan." Tobias shouts, quickly walking towards me and grabs ahold of my hands before I can move away. "I fell in love with you and gave up on the plan. I wanted to be with you. I want to be with you. I love you Tris."
"No, you don't." I shout, yanking free of his grasp, quickly stepping away from him to collect my thoughts.
I want to believe him, but how the hell am I supposed to trust that he really does love me and this is not just some trick to destroy me more later on? I mean, he did start this relationship as way to destroy me so his dumb ass band can be back on top. Who the hell even does that kind of shit? Only sadistic people, people lie Peter, play with other people's heads like that.
I thought I could trust Tobias. I thought he was different than Peter and that he would never hurt me, but obviously I was wrong. He is exactly like Peter. God, how the hell could I be so stupid to fall for another Peter? I knew I never should have agreed to that damn date to the Pier. I knew that this was a recipe for disaster, but of course naïve little me believed that it was possible to find a good guy. I should have kept my heart guarded like I had been for the past two years. I never should have let Tobias in.
I still can't believe all of this was some elaborate plan to destroy me because I was a better artist than him. That is so screwed up. Well you know what, I'm going to prove just how much better of an artist I am. He thought that this would destroy me, but the joke is on him. This is only going to fuel me more. Watch out Tobias Eaton, because I am going to destroy your world.
"Tris, are you even listening to me?" Tobias questions, snapping me out of my thoughts. I shake my head and slowly make my way back to right in front of him. "I asked you if you could ever forgive me for this. If there was any way that we could get past this and that you could one day believe me when I say I love you." Tobias states.
I wipe the few remaining tears off my face and set my face in a hard look, staring directly into his tear-filled eyes. "Why the hell would I ever forgive you? You are just some pathetic, asshole who cares about nothing more than himself and his success. You will do anything in your power to get what you want, even if it means hurting other people. I could never love someone like that." I state bitterly. I watch his eyes change from pleading to utter devastation as my words sink in.
"Tris, you don't mean that. You are just hurt and mad, but we can get through this, together. You just have to be willing to try." Tobias states, his voice full of fear and pain. He grabs ahold of my hands, but quickly pull them away.
"This, whatever messed up thing this is, is over. Goodbye Four." I state, walking out of the door quickly, the tears starting to pull in my eyes again.
"Tris, please don't go. We can work this out." Tobias yells after me, his feet pounding against the floor as he runs after me, but I reach the exit before he can stop me and I quickly escape, and the door slamming closed behind me. I can hear him run into it, and I start walking towards my car, fully expecting him to follow me out here, but the door never opens.
I get into my car, and the instant the door is closed all the emotions start flowing out of me. All the pain from learning that this was all just some plan. All the anger for how selfish and how much of an ass he is. All the hurt of realizing that I fell in love with someone just like Peter. But none of that compares to the heart wrenching devastation I feel about losing the guy of my dreams.
As much as I hate to admit it, Tobias is the love of my life. I don't know how I am going to survive without him, but I know that I can't go back to him. I can't trust him. Deep down I know he really does love me, but that doesn't mean I can trust him. I don't see him as the guy I fell in love with anymore. All I see is Peter and the evil, sadistic guy who plays with people's minds to get what they want. I can't love that person. I refuse to love that guy.
I also refuse to let that guy destroy everything I have worked for. I won't let this…thing set me back. I will channel it into my music and make the best damn album ever. So damn amazing that it completely crushes anything Free Four could ever come up with. Let the games begin.
(~~**~~)
"Max, we need to talk." I state, basically busting into his office.
"Tris, shouldn't you be getting ready for your album release party right now? You only have a few hours before it starts." Max replies, a hint of irritation in his voice.
"Don't worry, I'll be all dolled up and smiles when the time comes, but first we need to discuss somethings." I state firmly, taking a seat in one of the chairs in front of his desk.
"Fine, what is it?" Max asks
"So here is the deal, 'Warrior' is going to be my single. If you refuse to do this, I will refuse to show up for any of my tour dates. And don't even try to threaten to just replace me because we both know that there are no other artists on this label that can bring in the ticket sales that I do. Plus, I know you sold this tour as some love birds tour around the relationship Four and I have, so without me your little sells pitch doesn't work. So, like I said, 'Warrior' will be my single. End of story." I state sternly, leaving no room for arguing.
"Tris, all the radio stations already have the other song and are ready to air it tomorrow morning. Do you even have any idea how long it would take for me to change that or how much it will cost to change it? Not going to happen." Max replies matter-of-factly.
"I don't give a shit about how long it will take you or how much it will cost you. You will change the single or I won't be on tour." I state firmly.
"I don't know where this sense of entitlement has come from, but you are not in charge here. I am. So what I say goes. We will stick with the original single and you will go on tour, no argument. If you chose to not listen, I'll just drop you from the label." Max replies pointedly.
"Go ahead, drop me. I am sure I can find another label willing to take me on and even let me have control of my career. I hear Eaton Records is looking for new artists and I know for a fact that Marcus Eaton wants me on his label. Should I give him a call or will you do as I ask?" I state, practically daring Max to go against my wishes.
"Fine, the single will be 'Warrior', but you will be signing the other song tonight, no exceptions." Max states firmly.
"Yeah, no. I'll be singing a new song that I just wrote last night. It is already recorded and mixed and ready to be sent to iTunes for an exclusive release on there." I reply, a hint of satisfaction in my voice.
"No way. I will not let that happen. You can have the single, but you will sing what I ask you to sing tonight." Max states, slamming his hand on the desk out or irritation.
"And if I don't do as you ask?" I question defiantly.
"I don't know what has gotten into you today, but I don't like the way you are acting. What happened to the sweet, kind girl that I first signed? Where did she go?" Max asks confused and surprisingly worried.
"Why don't you ask Four where she went. I'll see you tonight. I promise you will love the new song." I state, getting up and walking out of the office before he can stop me.
"Four," I hear Max yell as I walk away from the office, a small smirk form on my face knowing that Four is going to get chewed out by Max.
"What is that about?" Shauna asks as I pass her on the way to the dressing room I'm supposed to get ready in.
"I don't know. Maybe you should ask that boyfriend of yours. I mean, he did have a part in what caused it." I reply nonchalant.
"Did they pull some stupid prank on Max again? I swear those two have a death wish." Shauna states with a chuckle.
"It was not a prank this time. It was something much worse." I reply, a little more ominous than I meant.
"Are you okay Tris?" Shauna asks concerned.
"Perfectly fine. I should go get ready. It is a big night for me after all. I'll see you later." I reply, waving as I head toward my dressing room.
"Hey Zeke, what did Four do to piss off Max this time?" I hear Shauna ask, causing me to pause and lean against the wall to hear his reply.
"He didn't do anything to Max. He did something to Tris and now it is causing major backlash." Zeke explains, his voice full of concern.
"Please tell me he didn't break up with her?" Shauna asks, but Zeke doesn't say anything. "Those two are perfect for each other, so whatever he did he needs to figure out how to fix it, and fast."
"Sadly I don't think he can fix this. He really screwed up and I don't think Tris could ever forgive him. No matter how perfect they are for each other, I don't think there is getting past this." Zeke states, his voice full of pain.
"Zeke, what did Four do?" Shauna questions concerned.
"He destroyed her. And in the process, destroyed himself. I never thought I would see the day that Four was heartbroken, but it has unfortunately arrived and I don't know how to help him. He won't come out of his studio. He came home last night and locked himself in there. The only reason I know he is alive is because I can hear him crying through the door." Zeke explains.
"Wow, I don't know what to say. Do you think there is anything we can do to help fix this? I mean, they are meant for each other, so there has to be some way to get them to see that. Right?" Shauna asks hopefully.
"I wish there was some way to help, but it is up to them to fix this. I just hope they figure it out before they both self-destruct and lose each other for good." Zeke states.
At his words I finally duck into my dressing room and leaning against the door letting what he said sink in. Tobias is just as broken up about this as me. He really does love me. Maybe I can forgive him. No, Tris, no. He is not the guy you thought he was. You will not forgive him and you will not feel bad that he is hurt. He deserves every ounce of pain he is feeling. He did this to himself. You will be strong and you will not give in. End of story.
I shake my head to clear my thoughts and proceed to get ready for tonight.
