Instinct/Conversion

A/N: Since "Instinct" had no definitive ending and took place mostly off-world, I couldn't come up with what I would have considered a suitable tag or missing scene. Instead, I've jumped ahead to its sequel, "Conversion". This takes place during AND after. Enjoy!

"John!" Helena called out, surprised at his presence. "What are you doing here? I mean, are you okay? I heard Carson ordered a gurney when you returned."

John shrugged and glanced down at his arm. "Just a bit of over-reaction, I guess."

Helena frowned.

John frowned back. "What?"

"Carson is not the kind to over-react. If he called for a stretcher, he believed you needed it."

John held up his hands in surrender. "Well, I'm fine now. Dr. Beckett released me while he runs my blood work. I'm on my way to meet Ronon for a run, but I'm starving. I was wondering if I could get a steak sandwich?"

Helena smiled and shook her head. "No luck there, my friend. I've got turkey, ham and tuna."

John frowned. "Turkey, then." He thought for a moment. "Would it be possible to get a steak for dinner?"

Helena tilted her head. "Wow, you're really in the mood for red meat, huh?"

John nodded, thoughtfully. "Yeah. Is it possible?"

"The Daedelus is still in orbit so that means more than a hundred extra mouths to feed and you want a steak."

John gave her his most charming smile. "So?"

She rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Fine. I'll see what I can do. But if you're late it will be cold."

John smiled and lightly tapped her shoulder. "Thanks." He accepted the turkey sandwich and grabbed a cookie from the counter. He waved the cookie at Helena and walked, cheerfully, out of the cafeteria.

oOo

"Feeling better?"

Ronon looked up from his tray. Helena was smiling down at him.

"I'm fine. Probably just a little tired. I did just spend all day chasing Wraiths through a forest."

Helena tried to hide her smile as she asked. "Wasn't Colonel Sheppard running with you?"

Ronon grunted.

Teyla suddenly appeared and sat, looking unsettled.

Helena's smile quickly dissolved. "What happened?"

Teyla looked up at Helena, then over to Ronon. Then she shook her head. "I'm not sure."

Helena's eyebrows knitted together. She grabbed a chair from a neighboring table and sat. "What do you mean, you're 'not sure'?"

"Colonel Sheppard…Have you noticed Colonel Sheppard acting…unusual?"

Helena's eyebrows rose. She looked at Ronon, who swallowed his food and frowned at Teyla.

"I mean, he's faster, stronger, more…aggressive…" Teyla started, looking down at the table, frowning.

Helena's eyes widened as Ronon pulled back from his food. "He beat me in a footrace earlier."

"And then went and worked out with you…" Helena frowned.

"And quite impressively." Teyla looked like she was going to say something else, but stopped herself.

Helena caught it. "And…?"

Teyla frowned, then shook her head. "I am merely concerned. Dr. Beckett called him back to the infirmary while we were together. Perhaps there is something more to these new abilities than it appears."

Helena thought there was something Teyla wasn't saying but decided to let alone, for now.

"Let me get you something to eat, Teyla and then I'll take Carson something to eat – he hasn't been here since you all got back and he'll be running low on Powerbars, soon. Maybe I'll be able to find something out."

oOo

"Not now, Helena."

Helena stood holding a tray of food and raised her eyebrows to her hairline. "What, too busy to shove a sandwich in your mouth?"

Carson paused. "I'm sorry, love. I am incredibly busy. You know I appreciate this."

Helena smiled and set the tray down on a nearby table. "Just eat something more than a Powerbar. Remember that the brain needs food to function as much as oxygen."

Carson smiled at her, but the smile didn't reach his eyes.

"What is it, Carson?"

He shook his head.

"It's John Sheppard, isn't it?"

Carson sighed and dropped his head. He crossed his arms and pinched the bridge of his nose. "He's been infected by the retrovirus and it seems to be taking over his DNA. It's only a matter of time before he begins to mutate the way that Ellia…the girl we met on the last mission…did. I'm meeting with the rest of my staff in the medical conference room in," he checked his watch. "Ten minutes to brainstorm possible remedies."

Helena read his face. "But it doesn't seem hopeful."

Carson's tortured look ripped at Helena's heart and that showed on her face. She nodded, quietly. "Where is he?"

"He's in the infirmary."

She nodded. "I'll leave you to it. Good luck, Carson."

He nodded. "Thank you, love. I'll try to eat somethin' before goin' to the meetin'."

She nodded again and walked past him to the door, pausing to rub his arm once before moving on, as though trying to lend him whatever strength she might have.

oOo

"Hey, John! Lying down on the job, eh?" Helena was as cheerful as ever by the time she got to his bed.

He was actually sitting up in the bed, but he grinned at her, nonetheless. "Did you bring my steak?"

She rolled her eyes and threw her hands up in the air. "Oh, great! You see me and all you think of is food. Fine. I know love when I hear it…"

John smiled. "No steak."

She laughed. "No. No steak. Yet. I'll have it for you for dinner, if Carson will let you have it. You know how he can be about red meat in the infirmary. Remember the cheeseburger incident?"

John smiled. "I think I fell in love with you that day," he joked.

She shrugged with a smile. "Just one of many. Like I say, a way to man's heart…"

John chuckled. "So. Are you going to sneak in my steak?"

Helena smiled. "I'll try." She suddenly looked serious at him. "You gonna fight?"

He nodded. "I'm trying."

She studied him for a moment and he looked back with his eyebrows raised. Finally, she patted his leg. "I have to get back."

He nodded at her and she nodded back, then departed.

oOo

Helena stood near the interior balcony doors watching Elizabeth speak to Ronon, Teyla and McKay. The mission to find the iratus eggs had gone badly, John was now in a medically induced coma after having attacked Elizabeth and the guards posted outside his room, and now, Elizabeth looked incredibly grim as she spoke to the others. Helena's head was spinning and her stomach ached.

John Sheppard had been the first friend she'd made on Atlantis. All flirting aside, he continued to be the best friend she had in the city. Even though he was, technically, her CO, her unique role meant that she was not in a position to have to answer to him on a regular basis. She reported more to Elizabeth than to him. Because of this, she felt that they could be more relaxed with each other than, perhaps, with other military members. It gave her the opportunity to be in a position almost as elite as being a member of his actual team.

She watched Rodney stop eating and it confirmed what Helena was thinking.

Elizabeth's head tilted to indicate that she was hearing a message on her radio. She spoke, then turned to walk away, quickly followed by the rest of Sheppard's team. Tears sprang to her eyes, unbidden. She swallowed hard and blinked back the tears, sniffled and began bleaching the service counters.

oOo

"Helena," Carson called. "I know you're out here, love. Sargeant Cooper told me where to find you."

Helena was sitting behind the pillar on the West Pier. She had a box of tissues next to her. "Go away."

Carson smiled. "He's going to be okay, my dear."

She nodded. "I heard."

Carson frowned. "So, why the tears?"

She frowned and threw a balled up tissue at him. Because of the breeze and the light weight of the tissue, it failed miserably to fly. "I am not crying."

Carson raised his hands in surrender. "Okay. I just assumed…"

"Well, don't." She snapped. "Maybe I'm developing a cold."

He looked as if he wasn't buying her line, but said. "Could be."

She sniffed. "Is he really going to be okay?"

"It will take some time, but, yes, I believe so."

She sighed and put her head in her hands.

Carson moved to sit next to her and put his arm around her.

She leaned into him and sighed, again.

"I know, lass. I feel the same way."

Reaching next to her, she picked up the box of tissues and offered them to him.

He chuckled and took the box from her. "Come, now. Let's away from here. Why don't ye go on up to the infirmary an' look in on him?"

She rested her head on his shoulder. "Could we just stay here for another minute? I'm over my break down, but I still need time for my insides to stop shaking."

Carson smiled. "I'm right here, love. For as long as you need me."

oOo

John Sheppard walked into the cafeteria for the first time in two weeks to see Helena sitting at a table. The cafeteria was empty except for her and she was sipping something hot.

"Hello, 'Lena," he called in the nickname he'd recently given her.

She looked up at him and tried to frown, failing. "Don't you ''Lena' me, buddy. I'm still mad at you."

His eyebrows rose and his eyes widened. "Mad at me? What for?"

She pursed her lips. "You scared the shit out of me and I don't like that."

He sat down across from her and watched her trace the rim of her cup. "Sorry 'bout that. It's not like I didn't scare myself pretty bad, too, you know. Not like I meant to."

She allowed a small smile to show. "I'm glad you're better."

"Me, too." He stretched. "Turkey sandwich?"

She frowned. "What? No steak?"

He frowned. "No. Turkey will be fine. Is there steak?"

She grinned. "Not at this time of night," she frowned. "Maybe there might have been two weeks ago, but I gave that one to Carson."

John looked surprised. Then he looked indignant. "Wait a minute! You mean you owe me a steak?"

"And you owe me a pacemaker. You gave me a coronary, young man."

John opened his mouth to respond, then closed it. Finally, he frowned. "Young man?"

She grinned again. "If you're as old as you feel, I'm old enough to be your grandmother."

John rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Turkey sandwich?"

Helena stood. "Coming right up."