I'm really not into writing these days at all (I'm not sure whether the World Cup or re-watching the finale is to blame), but I forced myself to write something nonetheless today. I let ImperiumWife pick which story I should update since I was completely indifferent and she picked this one :)

Day 28

Robin wasn't in his arms when he woke up, which made him shoot up and call out for her.

He didn't hear anything and jumped out of bed, already half sick wondering what she had done while he was asleep.

He could see some light coming from the bathroom and stumbled towards it, quickly checking the radio clock behind him, it was 2:14am.

"Robin?" he asked once again before pushing the door open.

She was standing in front of the sink, starring at herself in the mirror, clearly too much in thought to even hear him.

He slowly walked over to her and put his hand on her shoulder.

It startled her.

"You okay?" he asked.

She shook her head, and looked at him through the mirror, tears forming in her eyes.

"Come here." He wrapped his around her and pulled her into a hug, "it's going to be okay."

"I wish I could just disappear Barney." She cried.

He started to stroke her hair, trying to get her to calm down a little before they talked about what had happened at the restaurant.

Looking at them through the mirror, and thinking about what she had just said made him have an epiphany.

"I just had an amazing idea Robin." He said.

She moved back and looked at him, her eyes already red again.

"You will see…but it'll help, I promise." He smiled and kissed her forehead.

Robin buried her head back into his shirt, "nothing will help Barney."

"Stop that, I just thought of the most amazing idea ever, and I promise you, 24 hours from now everything will be better."

"How?" She asked.

"It's a surprise, just trust me."

"It would have to involve completely erasing my memory to ever make me feel better." She whispered.

"Well, we can't do that, you'd forget all about me and our time together too, and that's just not an option."

It made her chuckle.

"It'll be all right, I promise."

"Barney I freaked out last night…I couldn't have stopped if I wanted to, everything was just too much."

"You had a nervous breakdown, so what? I think you are allowed one after what has happened. It's not the end of the world."

"Everyone probably thinks I have lost my mind."

"No, your dad provoked it, I mean the stuff he said?" Barney shook his head.

"But he's right, maybe I could have gotten away if I would have just tried harder." She started crying again.

"No, stop it Robin. Stop letting him get to you." He lifted her up and carried her back to bed, "we'll start fresh, today is going to be the first day of your new life."

"That's what you said on my birthday too, and look at me now."

"That's cause we didn't have a plan, but now I do. Trust me Robin, everything is about to change for the better."

She sighed, "I can't do this anymore Barney, I'm so tired of getting my hopes up. Maybe it's time to face reality, I'm broken, and nothing and no one will change that."

"Stop that, I will never give up on you Robin."

She shook her head, "how am I supposed to even face the gang again after what happened today?"

"They understand."

"No, they don't. They will just pity me, like they always do."

Barney stroked her hair away and kissed her gently.

"Don't worry about any of that right now, right now it's just you and me, okay?"

Robin nodded, "I'm sorry I hit you."

"Phew, please. You know how often I got slapped back in the day? That was nothing."

"I didn't mean to hit you…I mean, it wasn't really against you, it was just…I was overwhelmed."

"I know, it's okay." He kissed her once more, "everything is okay."

"I don't care, get me in, or do I need to find someone else to take care of this?" Barney asked annoyed, his guy was giving him a hard time.

"Today, not tomorrow, seriously, try to keep up." He hung up before the guy could answer.

Barney looked back to the bed, Robin was still asleep. They had spend most of the night lying next to each other, cuddling.

She had started to cry a couple more times, but overall it went fairly well.

He slowly walked over to her, he hated leaving her alone, but taking her along to pick up Swarley, and going home to grab some stuff wasn't really an option either.

Lily and Ted would probably try to get her submitted in some hospital right away, and he was fairly sure that her mom was still at the fortress, waiting for them.

"Hey Robin?" he nudged her gently.

"Hey." She mumbled.

"I will go and pick up Swarley, okay? I'll be back as quickly as possible, are you going to be okay by yourself?"

She nodded.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine, don't worry about me."

"Call me if you need me, okay?"

"Barney it's okay, I'll be fine."

He nodded and leaned down to kiss her temple.

"Where is she?" Lily asked after he entered the apartment.

"Waiting for me and Swarley, that's why I don't have a lot of time."

"Barney we need to talk about what happened yesterday." Lily grabbed his arm and turned him around to face her.

"I got it Lil." He assured her.

"You keep saying that, but this has gotten out of control. She had a major breakdown yesterday."

"Her dad provoked it." He defended Robin.

"Barney, stop pretending like this isn't a big deal. She is in a really dark place right now."

"I know that Lily." Barney replied and shook her hand of, "do you really think that I don't know that? But putting her into therapy isn't going to fix it. She's so fucking broken Lily! What that guy did to her…" he shook his head, and took a deep breath.

"I know she's in a dark place Lily, but some stranger forcing her to open up about that night isn't the solution. She needs a break Lily, a real break, not sitting in my apartment by herself or pretending to be okay during get-togethers with you guys."

"She needs to start processing what happened Barney, you keep shielding her from anything real, but that's not how life works." Lily replied.

"I'm protecting her from re-living the horrors of that night Lily! How is forcing her to talk about it helpful?"

"I never said we should force her to talk about it Barney, but neither one of us has any experience in dealing with this kind of trauma. A therapist does though, that's why I think it's time to seek professional help."

"Well, I'm not letting that happen."

"Barney! Stop this. Stop behaving as if you have this weird claim over her. Yes, you are a big part of her life right now, but you don't get to make all the decisions for her."

Barney laughed, "right Lily, because I'm the problem here."

"You are if you aren't honest with us, Barney. How many nervous breakdowns has she had? And what else are you hiding from us?"

"Nothing, she has her ups and downs, that doesn't mean I have to share every tiny detail of her struggle with you guys. You know what, I'm done talking about this, where is Swarley?"

"Barney this is a serious situation."

"I know that Lily! Do you honestly think I don't know that? But forcing her into things she doesn't want to do isn't the way to go. She was doing so much better, until her parents showed up, I mean can you believe the things her dad said to her? He has no sympathy whatsoever for her!" Barney was screaming now and Marshall opened the bedroom door and emerged in boxershorts.

Swarley immediately ran towards Barney, who picked him up and turned towards the door.

"What's going on?" Marshall asked.

"I know you guys are worried about her, but I got it." Barney said before leaving the apartment for good.

"Robin?" Robin's mom ran out of the spare bedroom the seconds she heart the door shut.

"It's just me." Barney replied.

"Where is Robin?" her mom asked confused.

"She's waiting for me in a hotel room, I'm here to pack some things." He explained.

"Which hotel? I need to see her, is she okay?"

Barney nodded, "she will be. Look, I don't mean to be rude, but I think it's best if you leave. "

"What? No, she needs me."

"She doesn't, she needs normalcy." Barney replied calmly.

"How can you say something like that? I'm her mother!"

"Well, maybe you should have remembered that when she was a kid then." He knew that he had crossed a line, but he didn't care, so what if her family hated him.

"Excuse me?"

"You being here is making her worse, so if you really do care about her wellbeing, then I'd suggest you leave."

She just starred at him for a moment and Barney took that opportunity to walk by her and into the bedroom.

He pulled the suitcase from his suit closet and started tossing things inside, barely caring what he was taking.

Then he went into the kitchen and grabbed some of Swarley's treats and his food.

By the time he reached the spare bedroom to get Robin's stuff her mom has packed up.

They looked at each other for a second, until she said, "I know she trusts you Barney, so I'm going to do the same. But please, don't hurt her."

"I would never do that." He replied.

She nodded, "you are still a guy though…"

Barney bit his lower lip, "I'll never hurt her, I promise."

He watched her mom drag the suitcase out of the room, and halted a second before he continued to pack some things for Robin.

He wasn't sure if she was asleep or not and hence entered the hotelroom quietly.

The bed was empty, and Swarley started discovering right away. Barney put the suitcase down and walked towards the bathroom, the door wasn't fully closed which gave him a clear view inside and at Robin.

She was standing in front of the mirror, only wearing her jeans and a bra, but he didn't even pay attention to her chest, because he was too shocked to see what she was doing.

"Robin." He pushed through the door, which straddled her and let her drop the razor blade.

"Ba…Barney." She looked at him with big eyes, clearly scared that he caught her.

"What the fuck are you doing?" he almost yelled at her while grabbing a towel and turning the faucet on.

"I'm sorry." She started crying, and Barney forget the towel for a second and pulled her into his arms.

"Hey, sorry, I didn't mean to sound so harsh." He stroked her hair while she cried into his shirt.

He took a few deep breaths before pushing her back so he could look at her.

"Are you okay?"

She nodded, and he turned to the sink to grab the towel, fringing it out before gently washing the blood from her stomach.

"I'm sorry." Robin repeated.

Barney shook his head, he noticed a few more cuts that were already healing and had to fight against his own tears.

"Why?" he finally asked.

He was sure that they hadn't been there when they went to get the ultrasound the other day, but sometime between then and now she had started this without him even noticing.

Maybe Lily was right, he was in over his head.

"It helps." She whispered, barely audible, "it takes the pressure away when I feel overwhelmed, I don't know how to describe it, but it just…as soon as I cut I feel the stress subside."

Barney nodded.

"I'm sorry, please don't tell anyone." She whispered.

"I won't." he replied, "you could have talked to me about it."

"I didn't want to disappoint you Barney. You are the only one who still believes in me, even though there is no reason to do so anymore. I didn't want to let you down."

"You aren't letting me down Robin, but I wish you would have talked to me about it." He leaned closer and put his forehead against hers.

"I was scared you'd be mad."

He shook his head slightly, "I'm not mad…I don't think it's healthy, but I'm not mad."

"I only do it when I'm overwhelmed, it makes me feel much better right away."

"Why where you overwhelmed just now?" he asked.

"I was just starting to go insane in here. Thinking about last night, and just what my life has become."

Barney kissed her gently, "you could have called me."

"I just hate to depend on you all the time."

"Well, you better get used to it, because I'm not going anywhere." He smiled and turned around to call for Swarley.

The puppy came running in and Robin kneeled down to pet him.

"Hey you, I've missed you." She said.

Barney went into the bedroom, halting for a second to calm his own nerves down a little before getting her a fresh shirt from the suitcase.

"Here, we need to get going." He handed her the shirt and Robin pulled it over quickly.

"Where to?"

"It's a surprise." He smiled, "I tell you this much, first stop: Newark Airport."

"What?" she asked surprised.

"And I know a busy airport is probably the last place you want to be at right now, but I got us fast passes, so we won't have to wait in any long lines, and Swarley and I are going to be by your side the entire time too."

"Swarley is flying with us?" she asked while picking him up.

"Yeah, luckily he's still little enough to fly in the cabin with us." Barney grinned.

"Is this your business trip? Are you taking us along?"

Barney shook his head, "no, don't worry about my work right now, I will sort that out on Monday."

"Then where are we going?" Robin asked.

"It's a surprise." He grinned, "come on, we don't want to miss our flight, right?"

Robin looked at him for a second before she finally nodded and followed him back into the bedroom.

Getting checked in and going through security played out better than Barney had anticipated. He made sure to have his arm around her or at least hold her hand the entire time, and carrying Swarley and concentrating on him helped as well.

Swarley had to be in his crate during the flight, and Robin, who had the window seat, leaned against him.

"So we are flying to Charleston, huh?" Robin asked.

Barney nodded, "that's the plan."

"And then?" she asked.

Barney smiled and took her hand, "I've got us a beach house on Kiawah island."

"What?" she asked surprised.

He smiled, "you said you wanted to disappear, well, let's do exactly that. Just you, me, Swarley, and the beach. I think getting out of New York for a while will help, we can just recharge and focus on what's really important, rather than worrying about appearances."

Robin started smiling, "a beach house?"

Barney nodded, "it's a private island, so there aren't going to be a lot of people around either."

"For how long?" she asked excited.

"A month, but we can stay longer if we need to."

Her smile got even wider, "that's incredible Barney."

He loved seeing her genuinely happy and nodded, "it will be."

She kissed him, letting her lips on his longer than necessary.

"Thank you so much."

"You're welcome." He replied.

"Wow, this is amazing." Robin said as she pulled the back door open, and stepped onto the balcony.

"Isn't it?" Barney asked as he followed her.

The house itself was built on stilts, right on the beach so that the ocean was only a few hundred yards away.

"Thank you Barney," she turned towards him, and Barney smiled and shrugged.

"My travel guy picked it out."

Robin grinned, "it's perfect."

Barney nodded and turned back towards the inside of the house. The living room was connected to an open kitchen, and they had two bedrooms and two baths. The entire house was decorated in a beach house decor, which made it very cozy.

Swarley was sniffing on the suitcase and Barney grinned, "I think someone is hungry. Are you? We could order a pizza, and then go grocery shopping tomorrow?"

"Sounds really good." Robin replied, she was still looking at the ocean.

Barney walked back inside and got a water bowl for Swarley.

Robin came back in too and got the dog food out of the suitcase, "have you told anyone about this?"

Barney shook his head, "not yet, but I guess we have to tell them eventually."

Robin nodded, "what did Lily say when you picked Swarley up?"

"Typical Lily stuff, what kind of pizza do you want?" he tried to change the topic.

Robin saw right through him, "she brought the whole therapy issue back up, huh?"

Barney looked up and met her eye, "it doesn't matter what she said Robin, we are far away from all that now."

She nodded slowly and finally answered his question, "I'd like pizza margarita."

He nodded and pulled his phone out, "coming right up."

They ended up watching an ice-hockey game while eating in front of the TV, and Barney felt himself unwind for the first time in the last few days.

He could sense that Robin felt similar, especially after she had finished her pizza and snuggled up to him.

The memories of the previous day were most likely still haunting her, but he was certain that there was no better place then right here for her to be at.

"Can we share a bedroom?" Robin asked when the game was in its final minutes.

"Sure," Barney replied.

The master bedroom also had an ocean view and a door leading to the balcony, and he couldn't wait to wake up to that in the morning.

"Swarley, get off the bed." Barney said annoyed when he felt the little dog jumping up.

"Can't we let him sleep with us while we are here?" Robin asked, she was lying besides him, his arm draped over her stomach.

"He won't know the difference." Barney replied.

Swarley settled near their feet.

"See, he doesn't bother anyone." Robin said.

"I don't want him in bed with us Robin, he's got his own bed."

"He doesn't here." She pointed out.

"Fine, he can stay tonight, but we are getting a bed for him tomorrow."

Robin grinned, "sure."

"I mean it."

"I know you do." She replied, snuggling closer to him.

Barney took a deep breath and let it go.

He contemplated whether or not he should initiate a conversation about her cutting, but decided against it. They had four weeks to talk about things and work through stuff.

"Barney?"

He was still half asleep, barely acknowledging his name being said.

"Barney?"

He slowly woke up enough to realize that Robin was asking for him, she sounded terrified and he finally realized what was going on.

"Robin? What's wrong?" she wasn't in his arms anymore and he turned towards the nightstand to turn the light on.

Robin was sitting in bed beside him, her legs pulled up to her chest and tears streaming down her face.

"What's wrong?" he asked while pushing himself up and touching her shoulder.

She buried her face in her hands and shook her head.

"Robin, talk to me, what's the matter?" he asked again while putting his arm around her.

Swarley was up now too, sitting by the edge of the bed, watching them.

"For a moment I thought he…he somehow got me…I just didn't know where I was and…." She stopped talking and sobbed instead.

Barney put his arms around her and pulled her close, "it's okay, everything is okay, it's just me and Swarley here."

They just sat there for a few minutes before Robin had calmed down enough for Barney to draw back.

"I'll be right back." He kissed her hair before climbing out of the bed.

He opened the closets one after the other until he found a blanket.

He jumped back onto the bed and pulled Robin into his arms, getting up with her. She put her arms around his neck as he stood up.

Swarley jumped off the bed and followed him onto the balcony.

Barney put Robin down into one of the canvas chairs, and climbed beside her before covering them both with the blanket.

"Everything is okay." He whispered once they were settled.

The sound of the waves crashing onto the beach was calming and Barney hoped that she would feel the same way.

She was still crying, and it took her a few more minutes to calm down completely.

"Swarley, are you serious?" Barney asked when the dog jumped up as well.

It made Robin laugh.

"You know we are going to have a problem once he's fully grown." Barney whispered.

"We would have probably collapsed with this thing." She replied.

Barney smiled, glad that Swarley had managed to lighten the mood a little bit.

"Are you feeling better?" he asked.

Robin pulled herself closer to him, "yeah. I'm sorry I woke you up, that was stupid."

"Hey, it's not stupid." He replied.

"I couldn't help it, I was feeling so claustrophobic and sure that he was there next to me instead of you."

Barney was surprised that she opened up that easily and wondered whether this was her way of showing him that she was trying to open up to him after what had happened in the hotel room earlier today.

"You can always wake me up Robin, okay? No matter what's the issue, I will never think that it's for a stupid reason."

She nodded against his chest.

Barney had planned to stay out there for half an hour or so, just to get her out of the bedroom and the ghosts that had haunted her in there. But it was a mild night, and the soothing sounds of the crashing waves did the rest, both feel asleep.