Chapter 28

1905 London, The Making of a Sarcastic Bitch of A Vampire

Sookie's POV

We were in a darkened alley way, behind a quite large brick home. There were the sounds of a mild-mannered party coming from the other side of the large privacy wall. Pam laughed loudly beside me.

"Oh my god, Sookie! Why ever would you waste a wish to bring me back to this god forsaken place? Unlike my master, I have no deep seated longing to see my family. They nearly killed me with their boring lameness!"

"Oh, we're not here to see your family, Pam!" I chirped cheerfully, "We're here so I can see firsthand how it all went down."

Eric caught on first, booming with laughter. "You naughty little fae! You really wish to see me turn Pam?"

"Oh yes! I really wanna see how much of a fight she put up, if any." That statement caught me a well placed elbow in my ribs. I was just about to protest Pam's reaction when I heard someone breathing heavily. Looking over to my right, allowing my eyes to focus on where the sound was coming from, I saw human Pam.

Her outfit was hysterical, huge dress, ruffles, over-sized shoulders padded to the max and topped with a large, feather laden hat. She was pressed up against the privacy wall, breathing heavily with a look of utter rapture on her face.

"Oh, I remember now," Pam giggled wickedly beside me. "His name was Robert, and he was very good at that."

"Where is he and what was he good at?" I was beyond confused.

"You'll see in just a moment, my lover." Eric chuckled. "I am not far away from here, watching. As I recall, I was perched up on the roof of the neighboring house." All three of us looked up and to the left, sure enough, I would make out a motionless form sitting there. I turned my attention back to human Pam just in time to see someone crawl out from under her gigantic skirt.

The man, Robert I assumed, made a move to kiss Pam once he was standing and she shoved him roughly, laughing her most mocking laugh.

"Really, Robert, you know I don't kiss on the lips. Ever." Her voice was light with the refined accent of her birthplace.

"Miss Pam, please. You know I am in love with you, accept my proposal so that I might make an honest woman of you. It kills me to hear the things that others say about you."

"Do you think I honestly care what those dreadful, idiotic sheep say about me?"

"Darling, I merely.."

"Darling, be gone! You've served your purpose, now leave me be before I step on your pitifully tiny phallus with my boot!" She made shooing motions with her gloved hands as she tried to straighten her hat and skirt. Poor Robert scurried like a squirrel, not daring to glance behind him at the woman who had just basically emasculated him. Verbally castrated, if you will.

I heard a whooshing noise as Eric ascended from the roof top. I expected Pam to scream in fright but she laughed instead.

"Finally opted for a closer look, stranger?"

"Are you not frightened of me?"

"Why should I be? The worst you could do is kill me and that would only be a merciful favor."

"Oh, my pet, there is much worse than death. But you intrigue me, so I think that I will spare you those horrors, for now."

"And how, pray tell, do I intrigue you?"

"You are very forward thinking for a woman. I can appreciate that, being somewhat of a forward thinker myself. I find myself watching your little intrigues, night after night. I think we could make quite a pairing, you and I."

"I'm very selective, I don't take just anyone as a lover." Pam was livid now.

"You could not prove that by me since I have seen you entertain eight different men over the past five nights. But I do not want just a lover, I am offering you much more than that."

"And I will refuse you just like I refused Robert, I have no desire to become a paid for cow. I enjoy my status as a free woman. Marriage is an institution and I have no wish to be institutionalized."

"I do not wish to marry you, Pamela Ravenscroft, I intend to give you eternal life. All I need is a small token in exchange."

Laughing loudly, Pam grasped her chest as she gasped for air.

"You really are too much! Eternal life? Honestly, that has to be one of the worst come-on's anyone has ever spouted to me!"

"All I ask for is your blood." I saw Eric's fangs extend and in an instant, Pam was being held in his arms, moaning in delirious pleasure as he drank from her neck.

"Take what you want from me, stranger. Just please, don't stop! I've never known anything like...... this."Her voice tapered off and before I could focus my eyes, Eric had taken to the sky with her in his arms.

"I took her to ground in Bunhill Fields Cemetery. She never once complained about leaving her old life behind. I never thought for a second that she would. It's why I chose her as my first creation."

"We fucked like rabbits on William Blake's grave! It was delicious! And so was Robert!"

I looked at the smile on Pam's face as she recalled her first meal.

"He was, after all, technically still a virgin. I mean, he ate my pussy quite a few times but I never fucked him. He was still pure and he was exquisite to taste. I drained him dry in under two minutes."

"Pam was the perfect vampire from the first moment she awoke as immortal. She had no qualms about killing, feeding, or fucking."

I felt a ping of jealousy. What was Eric saying about me since I had qualms about many of those things?

My internal clock warned me that it was time to return to the real world. Eric and Pam would awaken as vampires once again. Thankfully I had remembered to spare them the agony of feeling the change.

"It's time, we must go now." I smiled sadly at my two currently human companions. I would miss seeing them this way.

"Sookie, you have truly blessed Pam and I both with what you have done. I will find a way to thank you somehow." Eric kissed me deeply and I relished his human taste one final time. I turned to Pam as she began to speak.

"I am SO ready to feel like a vampire again!"

And away we went, forward in time, only to find a total cluster fuck waiting for us back in the present.