Title: Matsumoto's Diary, or, Several Days in the Life of Matsumoto Rangiku
Date: 18 July, 2009
Words: 2449
Characters: Rangiku, Toshiro, Haineko, Nanao, mentions of Hyourinmaru, Shunsui, Hinamori, Gin, Renji and Shuuhei
Pairings: Toshiro & Rangiku
Inspiration: If I kept a diary, it would probably look like this.
Summary: Just what does go through Rangiku's head when it comes to her cute little taicho growing up?
Rating: PG-15 – not quite M-Rated. No details about sex and what have you, but a lot of talk about the subject matter. If that made any sense whatsoever.

A/N: I have been trying to get back into my writing, and I'm sorry I've been gone. Between work, boys (well, a boy), my sis and nieces (she's decided on first names, still no middle names)… it's been hellish to say the least. Usually I'm so exhausted by the end of the day that I just want to sleep. And I've been doing mostly that. Again, my apologies. But, I'm coming back!

This was originally intended as a side-story to my Child Rearing: 101 fic. So, you may read it as something of a prequel to that, or as a stand alone story (which I would prefer) with some of the same ideas.

Please enjoy! If you like it, let me know (and I think the review things are back to 'normal,' for any interested persons). Also, let me know if you'd like to see more of this type of ficlet, or if you don't like the style.

One last thing, for anyone who isn't sure, the words inside the parenthesis should be understood to be her thoughts that she is not writing down. I mean, what if someone found her diary. How incriminating would that be then?! Lol.

Thanks for reading, and if you find the time, please review!
-Rachel Noelle

oOoOo—RN—oOoOo

Day One:

Well, it's far from truly being day one. More like day 45,000 or so (Maybe that's a bit of an exaggeration… but only a bit!). How many years does that make? I've lost count. Anyway… You know something? And this isn't the first time I've noticed this, either (Haineko! I don't need you recollecting the times! Sheesh!). But Taicho has gone from being the cute li'l boy I ran into (literally!) in the market one day to being a nice looking (Actually, he's become quite gorgeous. Don't roll your eyes at me, cat! Meanie!) male specimen. Isn't fate cruel?

After Gin left (that bastard) I started to notice these things, but I was afraid I was just being stupid (because that would be typical for me). Besides, even now he's still young, right? Although, technically, here age is simply a marker of how long it's been since you were alive (hence how I am still so young and flawless! Shut up, Haineko!). But, Taicho's gotten taller, not much more than an inch or so, but it's obvious just how mature he is now. And I don't mean mentally, he's always been at least as mature as me, sometimes more so (okay, so some of my immaturity is just an act, seriously). But it's obvious he is physically mature about the same as a normal human boy about fifteen or sixteen years old (No, Haineko, I did not see him naked in the training room showers last week. And I was not looking!).

I guess that's about the age when Gin and I discovered one another (What a discovery, too. Too bad I can't modify that memory). And, I'll admit, those first few times together were only wonderful ('wonderful' being an overstatement) because neither of us knew better (at least I was still young and naïve enough not to know better). Looking back now I wonder how long he only pretended to love me just to have my body (Haineko, I am not conceited. I just know a good thing when I see one. Or a nice body). At least Taicho appreciates me for my mind. Well, he acts like it, at least. And I know how terrible he is at lying, too. So he must. (If not, I'm going to run him through with Haineko, and I mean it.)

But he really has become more developed (I told you, I wasn't looking. Well, not on purpose, anyway… Okay, maybe just a little, itty bitty, teeny tiny peek. But that's all, I swear). Since the defeat of Aizen and Co., just a few months ago now, I can tell the small differences in his demeanor (Yum!). And in the way he carries himself; and I caught him studying me the other day (I think my heart almost exploded from the pressure). Not in that lustful way most males tend to look at me, but, rather, in a way that says he's never really looked at a woman before (Okay, so that's not far from the lustful way, is it?). Much less one as, ehem, well endowed as me (I told you before, Cat, it's your fault. I don't know how or why, but I'm sure it is).

I swear, if Hinamori doesn't notice the boy pining after her soon, I'll strangle her and have her committed to a sanitarium (Actually… Maybe… Too bad that's probably considered illegal…). And no, Haineko, that is not a glimmer of hope that she doesn't. (What do you mean, jealous?! He's a kid! Right? Right. Why am I always wrong?)

oOoOo—RN—oOoOo

Day Twelve:

I caught him staring at me again today (Yes! Yes, yes, yes, yes!! Erm… Ehem…). I don't know what has brought about this sudden fascination with my body… At least I think it's my body (He already knows my mind, what else is left?). Nanao suggested that he's fallen for me (Please, please, please?). I asked her if she'd been drinking heavily with Shun-kun. She swore she hadn't (Sure, sure). I know it's unlike her to drink, but, something seemed to be amiss. (Is it good if other people are noticing?)

Again, Haineko? Okay, so he would be a wonderful boyfriend for some lucky girl, most likely Hinamori (I'd be a better candidate). Momo (bitch!) deserves a good man to take care of her. She can't take care of herself very well, sometimes. Oh, shit. I didn't mean that (Okay, so… I totally did mean that).

oOoOo—RN—oOoOo

Day Seventeen:

I've decided that I want children (I can hear the gods crying now "Heaven help us all!"). The only issue is that, unless I adopt, which I certainly could do (I still want a 'father' for them, though), I need someone to be the father of those children (Ah, the joys of baby-making). And, since I am currently seeing no one, not romantically (not yet. Wait til I get Momo out of the way, though), unless Shun-kun counts, and Nanao would kill me for even thinking about that with him, I have no one to father my children anyhow. (And the joy of baby-making flies out the window with that one, insignificant factor…)

I hugged Taicho today (Score one for Rangiku! Take that Momo!). His nose planted itself a couple inches taller (My poor boobs were a bit sad). Why do males always grow so quickly? They don't grow more than an inch in a decade, then they shoot up six or ten inches in a matter of a couple months (Make it stop! Keep the girls happy!!).

I think he smiled when I hugged him (it tickled!). That explains the extra-deep blush on his face. I caught him, and he really was embarrassed then, for behaving like the hormonal teenager he is (This is gonna be so much fun!!).

You know (and this goes out to Haineko), he was level with all the girls' breasts at the academy, and he's still pretty level with mine, not to mention most of the older women in the Gotei 13… Maybe he's a closet pervert, but no one suspects him because of his appearance. I must find this out! (Haineko! How could you? I am not devising a plan to get him drunk and have my way with him! Well, I am now that you've planted the idea in my head…)

Haineko, I am not (quit calling me a liar) looking for an excuse to get closer to him! (But it will be fun, won't it?)

oOoOo—RN—oOoOo

Day Twenty-two:

I asked Taicho if he really was a pervert (of course he is, even if he won't admit it), and he answered by looking shocked and embarrassed and sentencing me to three days of paperwork by myself (my BOB isn't going to last long enough at this rate). It wasn't like I was asking him to describe his first time with a girl in detail (actually, I don't think he's had a 'first time' yet. Oh, the possibilities!!). I can tell he's not into boys. That's a relief (Finally, Haineko, we agree on something). Kind of like when Byakuya married Hisana. At least the women in Rukongai could rest a bit easier, knowing the hottest man (at the time) in all Soul Society was into women, and not men. That way, should something come of Hisana, the other women might stand a chance of getting to 'rebuild' his poor, broken little heart. (And the only one who really stands a chance is Yachiru, though neither want to admit it yet.)

I just realized something. And I'm going to hate myself for this, but, Haineko was right (As if we didn't already know this). Now, to see if Nanao is right, too. (Well, at least I have three days of paperwork, alone, to get over the rejection, right?)

Damn. (Who did I piss off in a past life?!)

oOoOo—RN—oOoOo

Day Twenty-three:

Operation: Seduce Taicho has begun. Okay, I haven't set out to seduce him (not really really. Just sort of. Though it would be fun to teach him what I know…), I've only set out to see if Nanao is right (I am not lying again, Haineko. Why can't you be nice? I don't harass you about your relationship, or as of yet lack thereof, with Hyourinmaru). But, Operation: See If Nanao Was Right About Taicho's Crush On Me is just too damned long (seriously!). Beside, Seduce just sounds fun. Admittedly, in more ways than one. (Hey, I can't help it. I didn't make the rules, I just know how to use them.)

So, I haven't been with every man in Seireitei (who'd want that, anyway?), like the rumors like to tell it, but I have had a handful plus one suitors in my bed (Let's see, Gin, Shuuhei before he turned gay and started dating Renji, same with Renji… Wait, no. I wasn't ever with them. Man, that was some wickedly weird dream…). So, that should figure up to six (well, four minus Shuuhei and Renji). Including Gin. And all but Gin were before Toshiro made taicho. I mean Taicho. Oh, whatever. (So Taicho will be lucky number five… I did always like that number.)

Gin and I were off and on so many times through the years, that finally we settled into just a pattern of best friends with benefits (eventually the sex did get better, believe it or not). You know, like a fuck buddy. It's a crude term, but it's true. (Haineko, don't tell me that's not what you and the dragon are at the moment. I know better. What do you mean he won't commit until Toshiro does?)

Back to the true topic at hand. I suggested that I teach him to kiss properly today (if only… but I'll wait). Something mild, and not too embarrassing (at least I didn't think so). He stuttered out some refusal, after he pretended to think about it (After he thought about it, I know). Stupid Hinamori. He must feel like he owes it to her to be kind and wait for her (who am I kidding? He totally wanted to take me up on my offer). Maybe Haineko wouldn't mind some action? We could totally kick her ass. (Bitch is going down!)

oOoOo—RN—oOoOo

Day Thirty:

I talked to Nanao again today. Not that that in itself is new, but we talked about kids and her budding relationship with her Shun-kun (they're so cute together!). I must admit, she's making the best love she's ever known and I'm a bit jealous (not because she's with Shun-kun, but because she's having great sex). Granted, she's only been serious with two other men, ever. But she says I should talk to Taicho, tell him what she says she knows I'm feeling (sometimes I hate that she's so good at picking up on my emotional turmoil).

I'm over Gin, as far as romance is concerned (hell, I've been over that part of our relationship almost since it first started). Losing a friend like that, though, is almost worse than them dying. That part still hurts a little, but it's like I love him but I don't like him anymore. If that makes sense. (Maybe it's more that sister-brother kind of love? And no, we are not in Arkansas!)

Yes, I told Nanao I want children again (damnable biological clock. Stop ticking!). No, I didn't know how to speak when she suggested I ask Taicho for help, so to say (that idea has not crossed my mind, Haineko. Okay, okay. Maybe once. But that's all. Those other 473 times don't count. I was daydreaming!). I fell out of my seat at the table, and not from the sake (I can hold my liquor, just not my news). Which I haven't touched since I heard Taicho mumble my name (take that, bitch!) when he fell asleep at the office two days ago. Actually, he more or less moaned my name out (wet dreams in the afternoon probably aren't a good idea, Toshiro. But it does make for a happy Rangiku). And not that Matsumoto crap he always uses when he's irritated with me. He used Rangiku.

Well, that ends Operation: Seduce Taicho. And it didn't take long. (Not that I expected it to, I mean, this is me he would be trying to resist. Haineko! I am not conceited.)

oOoOo—RN—oOoOo

Day Thirty-three:

I finally did it (and am I sorry I did, or what?). I asked Toshiro to be the father of my children. Then he yelled at me, sentenced me to paperwork, went for a walk, and left me crying (Jackass!! He didn't have to yell…). I have since composed myself and taken my frustration out on the paperwork (heaven help the poor sod who gets to read it later). I'll kill Nanao (maybe that's a bit more aggressive than I intended. But I am going to give her a very stern talking to). This was her idea, after all (Exactly!).

Now I just feel incredibly stupid (not that this is uncommon. It's just never for this sort of reason). He's entirely too young to want to be a father (understandable), and he's probably got issues with the height thing. I don't give a fuck about that. I just hope I didn't fuck things up too much for us (there goes my cushy job working in the Tenth Division office). It will be most awkward at the office if this doesn't end well. Actually, if this doesn't end well I'll likely find myself assigned to the thirteenth as Ukitake's fukutaicho (He is a lot like Toshiro, only more relaxed and taller…). Or maybe he'll pull Hinamori (I think I hate her just a little more, if that's even possible) from fifth and stick me there with their new taicho, Renji (only problem is that he'd be no fun to mess with anymore. Not now that Shuuhei has stepped into the picture). I guess that wouldn't be horrible.

oOoOo

I guess things turned out okay, after all. We went to dinner tonight, and I got to teach him to kiss (more fun than the flying carpet incident I 'accidentally' got caught up in when the Twelfth Division decided to branch out their experiments). I have a feeling I get to teach him a lot more as time goes (one step at a time, right?). Well, if he's with me when the time comes, I'll be teaching him, at least (and why, pray tell, would he even consider not wanting to be?).

Oooh, this is going to be fun. (Yes, yes, yes!! Yes! Okay, Haineko, you were right.)

oOoOo—RN—oOoOo

A/N: One more thing. I'm beginning my HP/Bleach crossover fic, so suggestions and ideas for the plot are welcome. I'll likely also be doing a Harry Potter (only) fic, so again suggestions/ideas are welcome. I am primarily a canon shipper in HP, so there will be Harry/Ginny (because Ginny is the most awesome person in the world!!) and Ron/Hermione (they were, quite literally, written for each other). For all of you Arthur Weasley fans, if you promise to keep reading, I promise you'll love what happens.

-Rachel