Fuel to the Fire

Chapter28: I'm not going.


James had made up with Sirius by the time classes ended in December. Lily hadn't been quite so forgiving to Marlene, but then Lily rarely ever forgave. I didn't mind though. I wasn't talking to either of them. Anytime they were around, I excused myself to go and do homework, because Merlin knows we had plenty of it; and if I had to be around them I stayed quiet.

I was sad to admit I'd become a shell of myself, but I didn't have a choice. There was no way I was talking to Sirius Black and he just so happened to be in almost every aspect of my life.

Wow. Sucks to be me right now.

"1, 2, 3. 1, 2, 3... Very good, very good" McGonagall clapped her hands as she counted out the timing for the waltz. I sat on a chair at the edge of the floor. I didn't need to learn to dance now. I'd decided I wasn't going. "Miss Fox. Find a partner please and dance" McGonagall ordered when she noticed me sitting alone.

"No thanks professor" I shook my head. "I've decided I'm not going"

"Why ever not, Miss Fox?" She wrinkled her eyebrows and strode over to me.

"I'm planning on being ill" I answered dully, turning my eyes away from the dancing couples and back to my homework. This would probably be the first time ever that I came close to getting top marks in everything. Her eyebrows raised and she drew a chair next to me.

"Peyton, a remark like that from you would have been followed up with a grin and a laugh. What's wrong?" She asked kindly. I glanced at her, slightly surprised that she was showing concern. I thought she only had one emotion and that was 'strict'.

"Nothing. I just discovered that people who you think are your friends, will gladly turn around and stab you in the back" My eyes flickered toward Marlene and Sirius, who both looked spectacularly happy I might add, and then back to McGonagall.

She sighed and folded her arms. "Would this have anything to do with the argument I heard your brother, Dylan, having with Mr Black?" She raised her eyebrows.

"Dill got involved too?" I blinked. I wasn't even aware Dill knew. But duh, I guess Pickle told him. And if Pickle told Dill he'd obviously told Bean. Ah balls.

"Yes. Quiet heatedly I might add. I don't think I've seen him be so passionate about something since he discovered Elemental Transfiguration" She smiled slightly. I snorted softly. My Ravenclaw brother was the poster boy for nerd. "You and Sirius Black have been friends since you were 12 years old... Much to my dismay" She added with a rue smile. "I'm sure you will work it out"

I shook my head. "No. No we won't. He thinks that leading me on, playing with my emotions and twisting my feelings is payback for turning his hair pink. This won't just 'work out'" I shook my head. Obviously she didn't know what it was about. Her eyes widened before she composed herself.

"Well... If it means anything, and coming from me to one of my... most disruptive students... It's a lot" She smiled and winked at me. "You're giving him hell"

I snorted, fighting back the feeling of hugging McGonagall right then and there, instead nodding toward Sirius, James and Marlene laughing in the middle of the floor. The two were doing their own form of interpretive dance and having the best time. It killed me to think I should have been joining them.

"He doesn't look like I'm 'giving him hell'" I quoted with my fingers.

"Oh you are. Sirius doesn't want anyone to think anything is wrong... but I have watched that boy, and all of you, grow up. I know when something is wrong with one of my children" She smiled at me and nodded again. "Just watch him when he thinks no one is looking. He's not happy at all" She sighed and then stood. As if a veil had been lifted, the mothering side of McGonagall disappeared and the annoying professor appeared again. "You will be at that ball, Miss Fox. You're a prefect. You're opening the dance with James and Lily"

"But I don't have a partner" I protested.

"You better find one soon... Ah, Remus. Please dance with Miss Fox" McGonagall collared Remus as he walked past to sit down.

"Sure" He said with a smile and extended his hand to me.

"Ugh goody goody. You should have just said no" I grumbled as he pulled me to my feet. He laughed.

"Oh Pey. When are you going to learn that, unlike you and your certain other counterparts, I behave myself... which includes following the orders" He smiled and twirled me. I laughed as my stomach jolted from being twirled too fast.

The noise I made sounded strange to me and I realised how long it had been since I'd actually laughed out loud. While I danced with Remus, I tried to see if I could catch a moment when Sirius wasn't with anyone. When he was alone.

As I watched him, I saw what McGonagall meant. Marlene started dancing with Peter. Sirius stood to the side and stuck his hands in his pockets. He slouched and stared at the floor, no expression on his face at all. Part of me wanted to feel bad that it was my fault he was so upset.

But then my rational and hate-filled side kicked my ass and I felt glad that he was so upset. Serves him right, the asshole.

"He misses you, you know" Remus said quietly. He must have caught me watching Sirius. "And he knows what an ass he was to you... he's sorry"

"He should have thought about being sorry before he decided to prank me back by hurting me" I shrugged. Sirius glanced over to me and Remus and caught me watching him. He raised a hand, waved and smiled a little. I just raised an eyebrow coolly and looked away.

"He didn't do it to get you back" Remus shook his head.

"Oh Remus, I'm not daft" I laughed, tossing my hair over my shoulder. "I know that's exactly why he did it" I rolled my eyes. "I hurt his pride. He had to win. He's Sirius Black. He always has to win"

"Pey. I'm telling you. He didn't do it to prank you back" Remus insisted. I frowned slightly and blinked.

"Then why did he do it?" I asked.

"I don't know" Remus shrugged. "But I know he would never do something like that to you"

"Why? He'd do it to someone else. He has done it to other girls – led them on, dropped them, broke their hearts" I shrugged a shoulder. "Why am I any different?"

"Because you're Peyton Fox. You're that –"

"Remus. Don't. I don't want to hear it" I shook my head and stepped back as the music stopped. "If anyone wants me, I'll be in the library" I smiled at him and turned around. I scooped up my bag and walked out of the Great Hall, ignoring McGonagall's protests yet again.

There was still no way I was going to the dance. I don't care how much trouble I got into.


Plea's Note:

Oh my good godric. I'm SO sorry for the delay in this chapter. I've officially moved house and it's been a hectic couple of days without internet, running back and forth between the new house and the old house trying to move everything. My cat have gone crazy, my dog things it's amazing, I've had NO time to write more chapters OR answer reviews. I'm uploading this and then I'll tackle the emails and lastly I'll write some more on the chapter.

Thanks for being patient! Follow my blog as it'll tell you when there is going to be an update and when there's not.

Xo Plea