Out of the Ashes
Chapter 28
Emotional Haze
I didn't leave the couch until two days after the exams when Sasu was tired of me moping and tossed me over his shoulder and threw me in the bath. I washed up and checked to see how my burns were healing, which was rather nicely, and I changed into new clothes. I almost broke down into tears when I saw the things Onna bought me and I had to sit down and gather strength again.
Sasu made breakfast while I was washing up and coming back to the world of the living. We ate slowly while Sasu talked about the progress on the repairs around the village and how we should probably go to the Third's funeral in a few days. I agreed on that even though the Hokage wasn't really that important to me, personally.
I wondered when Onna's funeral was.
As if knowing what I was thinking, Sasu handed me a leaflet. I looked at it in confusion and he explained, "It lists the funerals of the shinobi killed in action during the invasion. Onna-san is the week after next."
I put the leaflet down like it would burn me. That was kind of morbid that there was a leaflet, like one of those things you get at a kids play that says all their names and who they played, for this. Sasu took back the leaflet and we finished breakfast in silence.
.
I ended up doing errands with Sakura for the mandatory D ranks that followed the Hokage's funeral. Sasu and Naruto were slotted for heavier lifting so Sakura was left to an easier task considering her arm. My team was actually considered broken up since Kinoe was stuck in the hospital doing surgeries still, Bu was out because of Onna, and Kyuketsu could be counted as helping with his clan. So Sakura and I had the morbid task of searching through the rubble where the giant snakes decimated the buildings. Sakura was actually a message runner but she helped out searching the buldings that weren't squashed and were only half taken out.
I removed the heavier rocks while Sakura kept watch and spotted for me in case there was a structural collapse.
"I'm surprised you're not with your team." Sakura commented as we broke through a wall into the next room of a house. It was clear of bodies so we moved on to get into the next one.
I didn't respond for a few seconds, "We're... fighting, right now."
Sakura was surprised, "You three always got along so well though!"
"Yeah well, Bu is mad at me now and I don't really want to face him." I admitted, "I don't think I could take what he'll say to me."
Sakura hummed, "No one wants to hear bad things from their friends but sometimes it's necessary."
As I broke into a room that smelled very not clear, I wrinkled my nose, "That sounds very adult and wise of you. Where did you hear that phrase?"
"Ino's dad." Sakura smiled.
We both frowned when we saw the body that was stinking up the room. I fanned my nose as we backed out of the room. Sakura went to go get one of the chunin so they could seal up the body into a scroll while I skirted around the outside of the room to see if there were multiple bodies. There were two, a mother and a daughter, both dead from what appeared to be chunks of the second floor breaking open their skulls. The mother was on top of her daughter, shielding her with her body as if it could have saved her.
I stared, deep in thought until I realized the chunin was in the room to get them.
"Did you find identification?" he asked me, breaking me out of my reverie.
I shook my head, "I'll keep searching the room. I didn't check their bodies."
The chunin grumbled about how back in his day, he was a rather old chunin corps member, genin lugged bodies off the battlefield without batting an eye. I ignored him and found a note from what I assumed to be the family's father and son. Apparently they were out of the village and wanted the girls to have fun at the exam festival. There was a half written reply with an attached picture of the girl in a kimono.
I looked away from that, it was depressing. The chunin found identification on the mother so I was allowed to leave the room. Sakura met me outside and we both shared uncomfortable glances. But we continued into the next building. We found only a few bodies that day but every single one of them was equally scarred into our minds.
.
The next day we had an off day and I actually spent my time with Sakura after Sasu ditched me with her. Apparently I was "making a good female friend for once" and I should "keep trying" so that I don't scare off Sakura. Bah, what does Sasu know anyway?
Sakura's idea of fun and mine was drastically different. My idea of fun was relaxing, eating some snacks, maybe walking around the village and seeing the sights. Sakura on the other hand wanted us to shop for clothes, civilian clothes at that, brush each others hair, and talk about boys. Well, the shopping thing lasted really only an hour. Sakura tried on some long sleeved clothes but she was clearly unhappy every time she looked in the mirror. The shopping district was also relatively bare with a lot of shops closed to either be repaired or the owners were helping out somewhere. Or dead. But hopefully not.
Brushing each others hair and talking about boys was done simultaneously on Sakura's bed. I was sitting on her bed while she sat on the floor, tugging the brush soothingly through my mane.
"I wish Sasuke-kun would notice me." admitted Sakura as she magically soothed me just by brushing my hair, "It's just... he's always so distant with me. When I see him with you or Naruto he's so alive and happy."
I shrugged, "Sasu mood swings sometimes. I swear. He's your typical brother though-a piece of shit sometimes, and other times caring." That's what a brother is, right?
"To you. But to me... I don't know."
I hummed, "I think before you pursue him romantically you should focus on yourself."
Sakura paused in brushing my hair, "Do you mean my arm?"
I actually did not, I meant she should stop being a wimp but the arm is probably an issue too. I'm just not that much of an asshole to bring it up!
"No, I meant you should train everything. You should..." I decided to say fuck it, "Listen to this suggestion. Have you ever thought about being a medic?"
"A one handed medic?" Sakura laughed harshly and pulled herself up on the bed next to me.
"Yeah, you only need one hand for medical ninjutsu. You'd still be a support but then you could boss Sasu and Naruto around and they'd have to acknowledge you can do something they can't." I have to admit, I was bullshitting as best I could. The Hokage died which meant Tsunade would be retrieved and then Sakura could learn from her. But until then, "Let's go visit the hospital today. We can ask my sensei to help you." I am still salty about the eye thing, but I can get over that.
Sakura was bewildered, "Today? I never agreed!"
I just grinned at her, "How about now?"
Sakura sputtered and I pushed myself off the bed. I turned around and she bit her lip at me before agreeing, "Alright. I can try it, I suppose..."
We walked to the hospital with an awkward air around us after Sakura tried to ask about how I felt about Bu and I promptly reminded her that Bu was mad as hell at me and that I would never like him as more than my stupid friend. Specifically the stupid one, Kyuketsu's the smart one.
At the hospital I walked around like I owned the place and since it was so busy no one questioned one of Kinoe's students wandering the halls. We went through each hallway looking for him until I spotted a slightly familiar guy in one of the private patient rooms. We locked eyes and he turned a bit pale.
I paused, "Kankuro?"
Kankuro sputtered. I stepped inside with Sakura following me. Kankuro watched us walk in nervously and I looked at him, confused.
"What are you doing here?" I asked.
His eyes shifted down to his hands, "It's confidential."
"Bullshit." I accused him, "You'd be locked up tight if you were holding information that sensitive."
Kankuro huffed, "I was hurt in the invasion and that stupid girl I was supposed to fight brought me here."
"Tenten?" Sakura helpfully supplied when I blanked on who he was supposed to fight. I almost asked Shino, but Shino was definitely not supposed to be mistaken for feminine.
Kankuro nodded, "I'm stuck here while Temari and... Gaara, got to go home..."
"What about politics?" I questioned, "I'm sure you're not that bad of a guy but you probably shouldn't be in our hospital."
He shrugged and I took a seat in his visitors chair while Sakura pulled up another one. He said, "Temari said your brother and that stupid blonde kid managed to stop Gaara. Something they said to him made him change his mind about... life."
"Sasu didn't come home much different than usual that night..." I think anyway. To be honest I was so wrapped up in my own problems if Sasu was facing his own demons I wouldn't have noticed. Did Sasu know about Naruto now? And what could Sasu have said to Gaara?
Sakura though smiled proudly, "Sasuke-kun is a nice person. I'm sure he helped Gaara-san."
"I bet it was all Naruto," I snorted, "The kid is basically a walking and talking ball of sunshine who doesn't give up."
I think both Sakura and I heard 'Believe it!' echo through our heads at that moment. She shivered and gave me a slight nod.
Kankuro shifted in his bed, "What are you gonna do about your arm?"
Sakura froze, "Excuse me?"
I glared at Kankuro who seemed to have realized that was not a good topic to change to. He shifted awkwardly again, "Sorry. I was just thinking..."
"Of?" I prompted.
"Well, what about a replacement for your arm?" Kankuro suggested. He looked away when Sakura and I shared a thoughtful look. In the back of my mind Fushicho sounded pleased.
"Like your puppet?" Sakura questioned, "I'm not sure how to do that though..."
"Maybe after you train yourself back up you can try it." I hummed, "It's definitely not a bad idea. We just don't have the connections to get an arm for you." You know, unless we go get the scroll with her actual cut off arm in it. That's definitely not what Kankuro meant though.
Before the conversation could go anywhere else a head stuck itself into the doorway. Kinoe eyed me curiously, "What are you doing here, Hime?"
"Sakura wants to be a medic." I told him and Sakura sputtered for a moment, hissing at me "I never said that!"
Kinoe looked at Sakura with a big grin, "That's perfect actually. Come with me, Sakura-chan."
Sakura looked at me with a 'What have you done' look. But she followed Kinoe out and almost as an after thought Kinoe yelled at me to get the hell out of his hospital. Apparently my broody chakra was distracting to him. I bet he just wanted me out before I fucked something up. Regardless, I did say goodbye to Kankuro to be polite and on my way out I passed Tenten. That was pretty interesting to me but we didn't know each other well enough yet where I would stop her and ask what she was doing. I did give her a wave though since we technically fought together in the invasion for a few minutes before we lost each other.
As I walked through the village, gazing about at the construction, a familiar chakra smothered itself just inside my radius.
Ita.
My body froze for a moment. I was able to mentally follow his chakra only because I felt it before he smothered it. If I hadn't felt that initial ping then I would have never known he was there. He was walking slowly and my body started towards the chakra before I was really thinking. When I did realize I was heading towards him I wondered what the point was.
Was Ita really my brother anymore?
He was really Itachi at this point, years of distance between us. But I knew that regardless if he were Ita or Itachi he was still someone who cared for his younger siblings. I wasn't sure if I really wanted to gamble on what he would do to me if I actually interacted with him but I could totally walk past him and feign ignorance.
I felt Naruto and Sasu as I got closer to Ita's chakra. They were sitting at Ichiraku's, unsurprisingly, and I figured I could join them. Ita's chakra was in a sweets shop a bit down the road from Ichiraku's and I peered inside as I walked past. Ita looked older, as to be expected, but the real thing that shocked me was the fact that Kisame was actually blue and actually really big. I questioned how they managed to get in the village considering they weren't even bothering to hide who they were other than a hat.
I kept walking although I could feel a pair of eyes on me as I moved. Ita's chakra shifted and he moved towards the street. He must have been watching to see where I was going. I slipped onto the stool next to Sasu at Ichiraku's and Naruto greeted me enthusiastically.
"Yo." I replied and Sasu asked me how my time was with Sakura.
I grinned, "I pawned her off on sensei."
Sasu made a face, "Why?"
"Secret." I retorted, ordering a shio ramen. I was so focused on Ita's chakra so as he crept a little closer I could feel it. I was sweating a bit from nerves but Sasu didn't seem to notice my anxiety.
Naruto leaned over, "Sakura-chan is with Kinoe-oji?"
I smacked my hands down on the counter, "That's fucking right! Naruto, I never asked how things are going with you two."
Not in the slightest taken aback by my outburst, Naruto started to ramble, "Kinoe-oji keeps trying to avoid me! He seems kind of sad when he looks at me but no way am I letting him get away! I found out I had an uncle, actual living family! I mean, he showed me to Pervy Sage which was awesome, I learned some cool stuff and we're supposed to leave tomorrow to train and look for someone."
I hummed, "Kinoe-sensei is a bit of an asshole."
"He is!" Naruto agreed happily, "But he's cool too! I wonder if my mom had hair like his?"
I imagined Kushina with a mohawk, "Maybe she had red hair. But definitely not as crazy as sensei's style."
Sasu, who had apparently heard enough of this topic already, groaned, "Shicho, I've heard about his 'cool' uncle too many times."
"I haven't though." I retorted.
Apparently feeling like a little shit today, Sasu remarked, "Then why don't I ask you about Bu? Onna-san's funeral is in four days."
I sulked for a few moments, "Listen, I really don't want to talk about that."
"But you're clearly upset and it's weird that Bu and Kyuketsu haven't barged in the last few days." Sasu grumbled, "While I think Bu's full of shit sometimes, he's been a good friend for a long time."
Teuchi placed my ramen in front of me and I thanked him. As I snapped apart my chopsticks I told Sasu, "Things are rough right now."
"Why? Why are they so bad between you two?" Sasu huffed, "You never tell me anything."
"Why do you care about how things are between Bu and I, huh?" I slurped up some ramen and Sasu made a face before turning to his own bowl.
"I care because you sat on the couch for three days after mumbling nonsense at me!" Sasu growled as he started at his ramen again.
I swallowed my mouthful, "It's my fault Onna-san died. If I hadn't been there then she would be home right now with Bu. And we all knew it was my fault."
"You can't blame yourself for that Shicho." Sasu said, a bit softer than he had been before, "Onna-san didn't give her life for you to blame yourself."
"You don't get it, Sasu." I managed to finish my ramen at Naruto speed and I shoved off my stool. I almost entirely forgot about Ita until I walked pretty much right past him. I looked up and found a pair of black eyes looking at me. I kept walking, as if I hadn't just seen him. When I was a distance away I hopped onto the roofs and ran home.
.
It occurred to me the next day that Naruto was leaving with Jiraiya. And I only realized because Sasu was going with him. But since we fought the day before Sasu only left a note saying where he would be and I was pissed off. I was pissed off at myself and at him. I ran out of the house like I was on fire and I ran right past Kyuketsu who was apparently on his way to see me. His chakra flashed in alarm but I didn't stop until I was at the gate Sasu said he was leaving out of.
I looked at the gate guards, "Did Jiraiya leave yet?"
They looked at each other as if debating to tell me and I growled, "My brother, Uchiha Sasuke, was supposed to be with him. And Uzumaki Naruto."
One guard spoke up as I flashed my sharingan to show them I really was Uchiha Fushicho, "They left about an hour ago."
Kyuketsu caught up to me as I was brooding about what I could do to strangle Sasu. He was a bit out of breath and he gasped out, "Kinoe-sensei is in the hospital."
I blinked, "Like, as a patient?"
Kyuketsu nodded, "He was with Kakashi-san when they ran into Uchiha Itachi."
I was pretty concerned, "And Kakashi-shishou?"
"Fine." Kyuketsu, a bit confused, replied.
I started to run again but Kyuketsu grabbed the back of my shirt and we both ended up on the ground, our heads cracking together.
I rolled over and grabbed the back of my head, "Fuck! Why?"
"Why are you running!?" Kyuketsu retorted, grabbing the front of his head.
"I need to-need to... I'll figure it out when I get there!" I stood up and started to run again. I heard Kyuketsu utter a few choice words and he started to follow me. I jumped to the roofs and I pushed my range as far as I could to locate Kakashi. I found him outside the hospital as if he knew I would be heading there. I crashed down beside him and almost lost my balance but he caught me with one arm.
"I see you heard." Kakashi murmured.
I looked up at him, "Sasu left the village with Jiraiya! We need to go after him."
"Why?" Kakashi cocked his head to the side and I struggled to formulate what I wanted to say. I couldn't say I wanted to find Sasu because he was going to run into Itachi, who wanted Naruto. And what about Kinoe? He wasn't supposed to be in a coma, what if he died? What if something terrible happened? Or something terrible happens in the future?
Kyuketsu landed next to me and I waved my hands around as I tried to say something intelligent, "I need to find Sasu. I have a bad feeling about Ita and Sasu meeting."
Kakashi sighed, "I suppose we should get going then if we want to catch up to them. Please get your weapons quickly and meet me at the gate."
Kyuketsu blinked, "That's dangerous isn't it? Bringing Fushicho to Itachi?"
"The only one in danger is going to be Sasu when I get my hands on him!" I announced but my anxiety was leaking through and Kyuketsu looked unimpressed by my outburst.
I was concerned. I didn't like that Sasu went with Naruto and Jiraiya. I felt like things were moving too quickly. If anything was going to happen I wanted to be there to stop it as best I could. Fighting Ita and Kisame would be like fighting Orochimaru all over again but I couldn't just sit by and do nothing. I didn't want to sit by and watch like I did with Onna's fight against Kabuto.
If you're wondering, no, I don't have a plan. When do I ever have a plan?
Kakashi flickered away and I turned to start running again. Kyuketsu stopped me with his words, "Hello Bu."
I looked over my shoulder and Bu looked a bit surprised to see me at the same time. He looked a bit ashamed and I shook my head. I didn't have time for this.
"Shut the fuck up, Kyuketsu. I'm not sitting aside while Sasu has to face Ita! He doesn't have to do it alone." I whispered, "I'm not losing him too."
I was overemotional. Kakashi was probably going along with me because he knew I was going whether it was allowed or not. And I was scared. I just lost Onna and Kinoe swapped with Kakashi's role. Sasu was with Naruto, not following behind. Too much could go wrong.
"Fu-" Bu began but I didn't hear anything else as I shot onto a roof and ran towards the compound. I grabbed my weapons quickly and I was out the door while still trying to put my tanto on.
At the gate Kakashi was already waiting and as soon as I got there we were off. Kakashi kept speed with me and as I got tired I refused to acknowledge it. The sun started to dip as we arrived at the town Kakashi said Jiraiya was likely to spend the night in. When we got there a fight was already happening on the outskirts of the town. Jiraiya faced Itachi and Kisame while a clone of Jiraiya's was holding a shaking Sasu back. Naruto was laying in what appeared to be a crater of all things and I was angry.
I was angry they weren't fighting in that hotel. I was angry Naruto was hurt. I was just angry in general.
"ITACHI." I roared as we landed on the battlefield, "What the fuck did you do to Kinoe-sensei!"
Sasu's head swiveled violently to look at me, "Shicho!?"
Itachi pinched his nose, as if everything was going in the way he did not want it to. Kisame eyed me and grinned, revealing a row of entirely sharp teeth, "You have a little sister too?"
"Fushicho." Itachi acknowledged.
I seethed, and Sasu popped Jiraiya's clone to come stand by me. Both of us stared down Itachi and our sharingan whirled into existence. Sasu took off his glasses and shoved them in his pouch, probably because he wanted to look like a bad ass.
Kakashi smacked me upside the head, "Don't look into his eyes! You know better."
I turned to growl at him and beside me, Sasu crumpled to the floor. My chakra oozed out around us and I closed my eyes. I could feel everyone around me like this without my eyes being open. Kisame was the only real problem, Samehada eating away at my chakra, but I knew he was the chakra void in my range so as long as I stayed away from him I'd be fine.
Jiraiya said, "Kakashi, why'd you bring the kid along? She's no match for her brother."
"I'm really angry right now," I admitted, "And I just want to knock some sense into both of my stupid brothers!"
And as we know, I don't really think when I'm angry.
I dashed forward before Kakashi could pull me back and as I approached Itachi I opened my eyes wide, staring right into his. As I expected the world around me shifted and Fushicho screamed in anger. While I stared down Itachi in this void the world violently shifted to my dungeon. Shisui rattled in his cage and Fushicho lurked up on the throne.
Itachi looked around in mild surprise, "What is all this?"
"Itachi! Shicho's mind is scary! Get out of here!" Shisui yelled from his cage. Itachi looked startled by Shisui's presence.
I looked at Itachi and shook angrily, "You're working with Kinoe-sensei aren't you? Why did you do that to him? Why not Kakashi-shishou?"
What if Kinoe was punished by his so called Law of Canon for this? What if that were to be Bu or Kyuketsu who died?
Itachi stood still, "Why did you open your eyes?"
"Because I know, Ita!" I replied, "I know."
He became very, very still, "What do you know?"
And I almost said it. I almost spilled the beans. But I didn't. I managed to hold on to my secrets.
"That you're a liar. That you wouldn't really hurt me. Kinoe-sensei gave me Shisui's eye because of you." I replied and Shisui sputtered from his cage.
Itachi didn't say anything. He just looked at me sadly.
"Sleep for awhile, Shicho-chan." he finally murmured,
He tried to leave but I latched on with my chakra, "Fuck! That! I'm mad! You almost doomed Sasu to a terrible life! And I'm just angry at everything right now!"
Itachi pulled harder, and I screamed, "Don't you fucking try to leave-!"
He left. Fushicho started screaming. I started screaming. Shisui was yelling in panic.
Fushicho grabbed my mind and pushed. You know what fucking hurts? Chakra being forcefully run through your entire body. If my mind's body could have a sore throat from screaming it would. Around us my mind was shaking with effort and Shisui's cage was violently swinging.
And then Fushicho gave a final shove.
.
I opened my eyes to the sky and clouds. I must have woken with a gasp because Jiraiya was standing over me after a few seconds.
"You're awake?" he was surprised, "It should have been impossible to wake up from that."
I groaned, "I have a migraine."
I rolled over. I was in between Sasu and Kakashi. I sat up and almost immediately regretted it. My world spun and I crawled away a bit to puke. My mind was surprisingly light and I couldn't hear Fushicho or Shisui at all. I could feel them though and that was reassuring.
Jiraiya was nice enough to grab my hair and hold it back as I dry heaved. I eventually spit up some phlegm but other than that my stomach was mostly empty. I sat by the fire with Jiraiya as I tried to get my senses back. My chakra felt slow and weak. I couldn't sense anything that wasn't in the immediate area and I ended up heaving again when Jiraiya offered me some water.
I didn't hear anything Jiraiya tried to talk to me about while my head was pounding and eventually, I entirely blacked out. I didn't see Fushicho or Shisui while unconscious. I was genuinely and truly by myself for once.
AN:
I actually hate this chapter. It started off spectacular and then I just, it ran away on its own? Like, I ended it here because I was simply unable to write more. I don't want to write Jiraiya right now, I didn't want to draw out the Itachi thing. I was so excited for her to meet him again but then I realized how powerless Fushicho actually is. She wouldn't be able to go after them on her own and she wouldn't tell Itachi about her thing. Fushicho just gets emotional over things.
HEY, I put up a new story. It's another story about a reborn, but this one is more focused on the central character who isn't as terrible a person as Fushicho. Well. She's not a broody teenager the entire story. Also, there is less a focus on OCs like Bu, Kinoe, and Kyuketsu. I think that story, Twilight River, is already far better written than Out of the Ashes. Out of the Ashes gets really messy sometimes and I just post because if I wrote it, then that means I was feeling it at some point.
I really want to do a Kinoe interlude soon, potentially next chapter. The problem is Kinoe just knows so much more than Fushicho and he pulls way more strings than she expects.
Originally, there was a rant about negative reviews here but I think the positive reviews I read while reading those made me feel much better about them. If you did read the initial rant, then I'm sorry it was there. It was long and I tried my hardest to explain how I felt, but I'm a talker by nature and feel like I made more of a big deal than I should have considering how AMAZING all of you reading are. 3 If you want to know what was said: I was disappointed by the negative reviews I've received being worded more aggressive and hostile than I would like for constructive criticism. I then explained I am a faulty writer as I forget plot points, mischaracter characters, and etc. I also pointed out Fushicho is intentionally an unreliable, oblivious narrator.
Fun fact: This chapter was initially named In Which Fushicho Is Sad while I was writing it. I needed a placeholder name.
Thanks to the following for reviewing (:
avada96
NotWeird (HOW DID I NOT SEE UR REVIEW, I LOVE IT)
Girl-luvs-manga
XxPrincessKanjixX
