SU5 – It's (Not) Stealing!


From ioludoodle:

I just love this story. XD The FBI obsessed with an X-box game based on Neal Caffrey. SU1-4 make me laugh every time.

It would be amazing if there was another chapter to this. Maybe the game gets shared with the rest of the office, and everyone gets hooked? Oh, to see Ruiz get pulled in would be hilarious.

And then OPR starts investigating because it sounds like the entire White Collar Division and some of Organized Crime is plotting heists and making forgeries, and Game-Jones killed at least some number of other agents. They'd be all WTH when they find out it's all a game. XD

Bonus if General Beckman finds out the game exists after OPR's investigation, and then Chuck and Bryce are in for it.


Chuck and Bryce were standing side-by-side, looking up at a screen with a very stern General Beckman staring down at them.

"What do you have to say for yourselves?"

Chuck goes to open his mouth and Bryce elbowed him into silence.

Beckman raised an eyebrow and questioned, "well? The FBI has just concluded a major Internal Affairs investigation to find a game developed by one Chuck Bartowski."

This time when Chuck opened his mouth, Bryce didn't stop him.

"It's a good game."

"Whether it's a good game or not is not the issue here. The FBI is in disarray and we are the cause."

This time, Bryce was the one to respond.

"With all due respect, General, Neal was promised something in return for helping us out. It's not our fault that it caused this problem."

Beckman frowned down at them in her frustrated manner.

"Have a look through the reports. Know them well as I am sending you in to apologise to the FBI for your part in this incident."

Then she ended the call before they could respond.


After numerous reports regarding the FBI White Collar department, an IA agent will be sent in to investigate whether the department has been compromised. They will identify those involved and organise consequences.

Following are some of the witness reports which were used to open this investigation.


Report 1:

Informant heard two agents talking about a heist. The overheard statements included the phrases, 'heist number 4' and 'they'll never know what hit them'. The item in question was a painting by Picasso.

See attached recording.


Bryce snickered.

"Like Neal would even touch a Picasso," he commented. To Chuck, he asked, "why did you put that in the game?"

"I couldn't make the game entirely accurate for just this reason," Chuck responded indicating the piles of paper before them.


Report 2:

Informant is a criminal who had been arrested for thievery. Informant expressed surprise that the FBI managed to figure out their crime.

Agent Clinton Jones is on record as commenting, "maybe we're just that good."

The informant heard Jones congratulate the agent who figured it out as he left the room. The arresting agent said that they had pulled a similar stunt two nights ago. They also said that they got away with it at the time however, also realised they left evidence.

See attached interrigation video.

Informant's concerns went unheeded until recently.


Report 3:

Informant is an agent with the New York, FBI, Organised Crime Division. After a successful arrest, he heard one of the other agents congratulate Agent Jones on his collar.

Another agent commented that, "at least he didn't shoot anyone this time."

Informant states that Jones' expression was unimpressed and slightly annoyed.

Attached is Agent Clinton Jones' record. There are few arrests where the perpetrators were shot however, it is less than the average agent's record.


Two IA agents were dispatched to the White Collar division.

Initially, agents did not report anything suspicious. What they found was a close team, even Neal Caffrey (CI and convicted criminal) was an important member of the team.

They later observed a pattern over time. Every Friday night, the main team of Agents Burke, Jones, Berrigan and CI Neal Caffrey went out together. At the three weeks mark, the IA Agents noticed one of the Organised Crime agents, later identified as Agent Ruiz, come up and scold Jones for shooting him.

On the fourth week, they trailed the group as they left work in the evening. The group gathered at Agent Burke's place and the IA agents watched through the window from the new FBI surveillance van.

What they saw answered many of our questions regarding the White Collar division.


Extracts from the IA debriefing:

Agent A: "They seemed to be playing a video game."

Agent B: "The game in question was one where they play as a criminal. They plan heists, avoid the police and FBI and attempt to get away without anyone dying."

Agent A: "The FBI opponents appeared to be based on the White Collar FBI unit."

Agent B: "From what I could see, it did seem that Agent Jones' game counterpart was very trigger happy."

Agent B: "There still appeared to be illegal activity though."

Agent A: "We observed Mr. Caffrey making a copy of the game and hand it over to Agent Berrigan. As the agents gathered should have known, copying and distributing games without the creator's and distributor's permission is illegal."

Interviewer: "But that's not what happened."

Agent B: "Of course not! We went in, all ready to hand out citations-"

Agent A: "And Caffrey insists he has permission to copy the game. That a friend of his created it and he has permission to distribute and present the game."

Agent B: "He claimed to have evidence that he owned the rights to the game. Just, not there."


Bryce groaned as Chuck read out that last bit with his best impression of 'Agent B, Internal Affairs Agent'. "What is it?"

"Neal can sometimes be such an idiot," Bryce grumbled. "He should have kept that information in the game case."

Chuck flipped through the rest of the papers.

"Yeah. Uh, it looks like they've put the investigation on hold while they try and contact the creator of the game."

"Didn't Neal show them the evidence?"

"'Let me remind you, Neal Caffrey is one of the best forgers out there'," Chuck read off the paper. "I'd like to know who said that. They're causing us a lot of trouble."

"No wonder Beckman was so annoyed," Bryce realised, "we're going to have to fly to New York and meet with the FBI."

"Think you'll be able to enter the FBI building without being mistaken for Neal? And arrested?"

Bryce gave Chuck a look somewhere between confident and annoyed.


The elevator doors opened and Bryce and Chuck came face-to-face with Neal and Peter.

"Um," Neal stuttered before turning around. Only Peter's lightning quick hand on his shoulder kept him from escaping.

"Neal?" Peter questioned. "Why is there another you on the elevator? If this is your 'get out of house arrest plan', it's a terrible one."

"He's on house arrest so what's he doing here?" Bryce questioned, harsher than intended because he hadn't thought Neal would be here.

"I've been escorting him to and from his house so he can work."

"I get handcuffed while in the elevator and they don't come off until I get back to June's," Neal grumbled, glaring at Bryce. "This is all your fault."

"Really, this would be the fault of the master forger who makes everyone doubt his documentation," Chuck pointed out.

Bryce barked a laugh while Neal glared at Chuck.

"Agent Burke," Bryce greeted, extending his hand. "I'm Bryce, Neal's twin brother and co-creator of the James Bonds game. I designed the scenario and characters." Bryce shook Peter's hand and motioned to Chuck. "This is Chuck Bartowski. He designed the game interface, gameplay and pretty much everything I didn't."

"You did a great job with that," Peter complemented Chuck as he shook his hand.

They both noticed the look Neal shot at Bryce and the whisper of;

"Stop conning my FBI handler into thinking you're a nice person."

"Not my fault people like me more," Bryce whispered back.

Peter rolled his eyes and guided Chuck into the office.

"They're going to cause chaos, aren't they?" he commented to Chuck as the other man glanced worriedly back at the twins.

"I'm still waiting for something to explode," Chuck responded quietly. "Or for someone to get arrested."

Peter laughed at that. He liked this guy.

"Alright, that's enough of that," Bryce said, walking past. "Let's get this misunderstanding cleared up."