Okay, here we are. Last post of this chapter. Very excited. ;)

BTW, a training orb is one of those thingies Luke uses in OT, on the Falcon with Obi-wan, when he first attempts to learn how to use a lightsaber. I searched the databanks online but couldn't find what they're really called. This is what I get for leaving my resource books back home instead of bringing them to college with me. rolls eyes

And this chapter is way longer than I intended, which is why it took so long to get done. But I bet I won't hear any complaints. There's something for just about everyone in this one. ;)


Anyways, enjoy!

:D :D :D

Chapter Five:

Lightsabers

Two years and seven months after Rebirth of the Light . . .


A few weeks later, there came a knock at the door. Unknowingly, it heralded a great change in the Skywalker's lives, one the herald would initially regret.

"Sabé?!"

Padme stood in the doorway, staring in surprise at her best friend. They had neither seen nor heard from the former handmaiden since the disastrous incident involving the dinner and her sudden departure. That had been nearly a year ago, and with all of her worries centered on her silent son, Padme had given very little thought to Sabé.

Her first thought was to ask her friend to leave.

The look on Obi-wan's face, and his quite desperation after Sabé's last visit had touched Padme, and she had been angry to think the woman would hurt the Jedi, considering how much they cared for one another. Sabé's attitude toward Kenobi on that visit had been caring, but dismissive, and Padme felt the need to protect him from that happening again. "What are you doing here?" She hoped her voice didn't sound too cold.

If Sabé noticed, and knew the reason for the tone of voice, she didn't give any indication. Her smile was somewhat apologetic. "I came to see the twins. They turned two last month, didn't they? I was on Alderaan a few days ago and picked up these."

She reached out and there were two children's coloring books in her hands, the covers depicting the peaceful planet and its people. In her other hand was two large boxes of crayons. "Can I come in?"

Padme felt tears in her eyes, already feeling bad for her harsh words. She swallowed an apology and quickly opened the door wider. "Oh, Sabé! Of course! Please, come in!"

She led her into the house, the home they had shared together in Padme's last few months of pregnancy and then as a reunited wife. They could hear a little girl's voice gaily carrying on a conversation with herself in one of the rooms and when they came around the corner, Leia looked up cheerfully from playing with her dolls.

Sabé gasped when she saw the little girl, then approached slowly and knelt down beside her. "Hi there, Leia. You probably don't remember me. My name is Sabé. I'm one of your mama's friends."

Staring at this familiar and yet not so familiar face, Leia sat aside her dolls and reached for the woman's hand. She held it, staring up into her eyes, and after a few moments, smiled.

"I know you." She said, much to Sabé's surprise. There was a brush against her mind and then suddenly, Sabé's head was filled with a barrage of memories, feelings. She saw herself standing next to Obi-wan, and then Padme, wrapped lovingly in that haze that fills all children's earliest memories. There was a warmth and comfort there, but it vanished as soon as she recognized it, and she realized she was back on the floor next to the little girl.

Leia was silent, looking down at her hands. Her brother, Luke, looking so much like a younger, healthy version of his father, was standing next to her, a very unhappy expression on his little face.

He had his hand resting on Sabé, but his disapproving eyes were on his sister.

"What . . . what just happened?" the agent mumbled, looking to Padme for help. But her friend just shrugged and looked at her son.

"Luke?"

"I shouldn't have." Leia muttered, looking up at her brother. "I forgot. I'm not supposed to use my powers that way." When Luke nodded and pulled away, she reached for Sabé's hand again and clasped it tight. "I'm sorry."

"Oh, sweetheart." Sabé laughed, "it's alright. You didn't hurt me. But I'm sure your brother is right. It's alright this time though, Luke," she explained to the boy. "Leia didn't mean any harm."

Seemingly satisfied by this, the boy sat down next to his sister and gratefully accepted the color books she gave them.

"He still hasn't said a word." Padme explained when they had retreated to the kitchen, a cup of tea in each of their hands. The mother clung to hers like a life line. "I just don't know what I'm going to do."

What could possibly be done? For what Padme had explained, Luke was more than capable of speech. He laughed, and sang quietly to himself from time to time. But he never uttered a word. So he wasn't simple. There was no damage to the brain.

"We thought maybe, it was because he could just as easily communicate through the Force. And let Leia do all the talking for him." Padme admitted. "and we've tried to discourage this, as much as we can. We know Luke understands. He's such a bright boy, even for one so young! But if this is the case, the only other way would be to separate them, completely. And I could never allow such a thing."

Thinking back to how that had been their plan two years ago, just before the twins were born, Sabé thought she understood. To protect the twins, they were going to have to be separated, so as to be properly hidden from their father and the Emperor.

After escaping such a terrible loss, it wouldn't be fair to ask Padme to do it now, now that it was safe for her family to be together.

"Sometimes I just tell myself it's the will of the Force, that there's some plan. . . "

Padme left off, staring fearfully over Sabé's shoulder into the hall. Knowing almost before she turned around whom it would be, the agent felt green eyes boring into her. Obi-wan stood in the doorway, a mixed look of longing and surprise written across his features.

Anakin entered behind his friend and stopped dead when he saw the visitor that had come unannounced.

There was one of those long awkward silences, then Sabé gulped and Padme woke from her trance. "Anakin, Obi-wan. We were just having some tea. Would you like some?"

She berated herself the instant the words were out of her mouth, knowing how they would hurt Anakin, but her husband didn't even seem to notice, merely looked at his old master, than stepped around the frozen man and into the kitchen.

Sabé stayed where she was, staring.

"How was your meditation?" Padme asked in a low voice as she poured another cup for herself, keeping her eyes on the other two.

"Lacking in foresight," her husband muttered, studying his friend with concern.

Obi-wan stood rooted to the floor, trying to struggle through his emotions. Oh, he was angry. There was no doubt about that. Here she was, after having been gone for nearly a year after so easily dismissing him. No word, nothing to let him know she was safe, hadn't been wounded or captured by the Imperials. Or that she was thinking of him. For a whole year, nothing. And then one day, she just shows back up in his home, unannounced, uninvited.

But as angry as he was, he was also thrilled. She had come back. Like she had promised, she was here again. And as easy as it was to say he hated her, he couldn't. Because it wasn't true. He loved her too much to hate her.

Force, Obi-wan realized. I love her.

Had he gone mad? He was a Jedi. A Jedi Master. He couldn't be as rebellious as Anakin and fall in love with a woman, no matter how much he cared for her.

Damn her, Obi-wan thought, a bitter taste in his mouth, knowing it was sweet love mixing with the lonely future his duty and responsibility had condemned him to. Damn her for coming back and bringing this with her.

But then he saw the look in her eyes, felt the regret and the guilt and knew she suffered as he did. And she also feared having hurt him to the point where he might turn her away.

And almost without knowing it, Obi-wan stepped forward and took her hands in his. Her eyes cried with gratitude as he pulled her close to his heart. They stared lovingly at each other, utterly unaware of the rest of the galaxy.

Padme sighed from across the room, remembering her own similar moments with Anakin, then took her husband's hand and pulled his quietly from the room.

"Best to leave them alone for a while, Ani."

"Are you sure?" Anakin joked, pretending to glance worriedly over his shoulder. "The last time a Jedi was left alone with a Nabooian woman – "

"Wonderful things happened." His wife interrupted, pointing to the family room where the twins lay on their stomachs, laughing and coloring in their new books. Anakin nodded and gazed adoringly at his children.

He was glad Obi-wan at last had found some measure of happiness in his life.

It made him all the more determined to fulfill his destiny and defeat the Darkness. To make the galaxy a safe place for his children and any that Obi-wan might have with his beloved handmaiden. For their children and everyone else's out there, who either suffered or were threatened by the rule of the Sith.

For children like Jan's little girl, and Mara.

With this in mind, he disentangled himself from his wife's arms and gave her a little squeeze, where a kiss should have been. "I had better go."

"You're not going to go practice, are you? How can you, without Obi-wan?"

"I have some training orbs I can use," he explained. "Let him have some time alone with Sabé, to work things out. Besides, these can help me practice fighting multiple enemies."

"Alright, just promise you'll be careful."

"Aren't I always?"

She smiled lovingly up at him and, squashing a brief stab of envy where Obi-wan and Sabé were concerned, he brushed her cheek with the back of his hand. Padme continued to smile, but Anakin knew, inside she was thinking the same thing.

He passed by the kitchen door on his way out, training orbs in hand, as quietly as possible. But it's pointless to try and sneak by a Jedi and the door swung open. Obi-wan, cup of tea in hand, looked questioningly at his friend. Inside, Anakin could see Sabé sitting at the table, sipping her own cup.

"Anakin? You're going to go practice?"

"Just a little," he confirmed, motioning to the orbs he had in hand. "I should be back before too long."

". . . You don't want me to come with you?" Obi-wan asked, but Anakin could see how hope and sincerity struggled inside his friend. So he simply smiled and shook his head, then cocked it in the direction of the agent. Kenobi smiled, then nodded. "Thanks. For understanding."

He watched his friend leave the house and head toward the hills where they practiced away from the house, then allowed the kitchen door to swing shut.

"Maybe you should have gone with him." Sabé reached for his hand when he sat back down and gripped it in hers.

"Anakin understands. He knows we need time to talk."

"We have the rest of our lives to talk, Obi-wan. Or just to be. As long as you're willing."

And, he knew now, he was.


It was a good day for practicing, Anakin reckoned as he blocked the stinging bolt of one of the training orbs. The sky was clear, with a light breeze, and though he could not feel it, he knew the sun made the day cozy with its warmth.

A good day for practicing. . . or falling in love.

He blocked another shot, then swerved on his heel to protect himself from a second. The tiny orbs constantly altered positions, firing unexpectedly from different directions. And with his eyes closed, Anakin relied greatly upon the Force to be prepared.

But he also drew from his own senses. The sound the orbs made as they flew through the air, the shifting of the dirt underneath his boots to remind him he was on safe, stable ground.

But his mind was elsewhere. Back to those days on Naboo, when his own feelings for a woman had changed his life, had changed hers. And not always for the better. But things were different now.

Surely Sabé and Obi-wan could be together.

Surely, now that the Order was destroyed, and many of the old beliefs with them, he and Kenobi could reconstruct it, and their lives, as they wanted to.

That was, he reminded himself, only if he got the chance to rebuild the order. And that would only happen if he proved himself worthy to the Force, by completing his training and destroying the Emperor.

On this note, Anakin reached to his belt and retrieved a seventh orb and activated it. In truth, he should only have been fighting with three or four, or they might prove to be too much for him alone. But Anakin knew he had to push himself.

Had to be better than he was. Than he had been.

Had to become that hero everyone so desperately needed, just as he had so easily become the villain Palpatine had wanted. He could do it again, if needed. He could change himself, better himself, if he pushed harder, worked harder. Never backed down from a challenge.

Eight orbs . . .nine. . .

He swung the lightsaber around, a constant cobalt flash of light surrounded him, blocking each little red bolt as it tried to reach him.

He could be better. He would have to be. Not for pride, or arrogance or even for guilt of his easy failings in the past. Not because he still wanted to be the greatest Jedi ever, a dream he had finally let slip away, staring into the mirror for the first time and seeing his ruined face. Seeing what had been done to him and maybe, somewhere deep inside, knowing it was a physical reflection of the emotional pain he had caused others.

Those he cared about, those he loved. Some he didn't even know, but his actions had caused nothing but sorrow in their lives.

People like Jan and her innocent dead daughter. Children like Mara, still trapped within the Emperor's dark grasp. What had he done to that little girl, since Vader had brought the babe to him? Was she still, somewhere deep down inside, just a child, like his own daughter? Or had Palpatine some how marked her? Made her his own?

A slave?

Ten orbs. . .

They didn't all fire at once, or one after the other. Some would sit silent and wait, wait until it thought he had forgotten about it. Then a red laser would come sizzling towards him and Anakin would have to react.

Sometimes they would all go silent, none of them moving, and he would use the opportunity to catch his breath, collect his thoughts. But they would always return.

He just had to be ready.

Like he would be, for whatever Palpatine threw his way. He would defeat the Emperor and his Darkness. . . and Skywalker's own Darkness. Oh, he knew all to well, there were traces left. Scars on his soul. Wounds that had healed but left terrible, eternal marks. But they didn't bother him as much as others might think.

We all have a little darkness inside of us, Anakin reasoned, blocking a shot at his leg while ducking one from above.

Just enough, to remind us we're part of a larger whole, part of a balance between the forces of good and evil. Some of us just go a little too far, is all.

Now he had all twelve orbs buzzing around, firing. He ducked and swerved, avoiding those he could not block by dancing around them. The orbs followed him as he went, waiting for his defenses to lower, as was their function. They were a good way to train for battle.

And somewhere in there, between the flashes of the laser bolts and the blue streaks of light left from the passing of his blade, Anakin's focus shied, for just an instant.

But it was long enough.

His focus wavered just long enough, and a bolt came blazing past his blade, past the tiny Force shields he could erect when concentrating.

At first, he wasn't even aware it had happened. He heard the sizzle, but thought it was a bolt against his blade. Dismissed it, till a second later when the Force around and inside of him suddenly panicked and he was momentarily blinded by an overpowering sense of warning.

When his 'vision' cleared, Anakin realized there were alarms going off in his helmet, lights flashing and he could hear a voice, but couldn't make it out. Everything was suddenly so strange, so distant. He reached out for something to hold on to, but his hand met only air. Feeling dizzy, he reached out with his senses but found only confusion.

And it was then he realized, he couldn't breathe.

Panic nearly overtook him, but Anakin strictly told himself to calm down. But it was hard, so hard to concentrate. Nothing made any sense. . . everything felt so strange. Not enough air to the brain, a tiny voice in his head whispered. . . but. . . but he couldn't seem to remember what to do about it.

He was. . . fading. . . his hand reached down to the control panel on his chest. . . his gloved fingers encountered something strange.

That wasn't there before, his muddled mind thought, running his hand over the scorch hole. How. . . how strange. Where had that come from? And how, he wondered, could so small a laser bolt destroy his respiratory system?

How. . . ironic, Anakin thought as he sunk to his knees, his thoughts flying about his head senselessly, like sand across the dunes of Tatooine. He reached out. . . for that comforting touch of home. . . his fingers found hard packed earth and tall grass instead. How ironic. . . he was so easily defeated, by his own foolishness. And not. . . for the first time either.

So this was what he been warned about, that day at the lake. This was what the Force. . . had been trying. . . trying to tell him. Concentrate. Keep your focus. Lost it once. . . he found himself being devoured by fire. . . .and lava. Loosing it this second time. . . he found himself reliving the vision, and for the first time, hearing the warning behind it.

He didn't even have the ability to call out through the Force.

Anakin watched as darkness crept into his vision, smothering him.


"Obi-wan? Sabé? Can I come in?"

"Of course, Padme." Obi-wan smiled, motioning for the young woman to feel free to enter the kitchen. He and Sabé still sat at the table, their cups empty but their hearts full of still unsaid things.

They had actually said very little, in the three hours since they had first sat down together. And, he knew, it was going to take a long time, for him to find the words to say the things he wanted to. To explain how he felt, and why. And even longer for them to figure out, just what they were going to do about this.

Love truly was a difficult matter.

"I'm sorry to bother you." Padme looked sheepish, entering with little Leia in tow. "The twins were hungry so I thought I might sneak in and get them something quick for lunch."

"Lunch sounds like an excellent idea." Sabé agreed, rising to offer a hand. She paused only long enough to give Obi-wan a look that clearly said they were not finished. He nodded in understanding. "I'll help you make up some sandwiches and drinks. Obi-wan, will you get out the chips?"

He rose to help, but stopped when the door swung open a second time and Luke came in. It was the expression on his face that stopped Kenobi cold.

"Luke?"

It must have been his tone of voice, because both women stopped and turned to look at the little boy who stood in the doorway. Leia, too, stopped her chattering and stared at her brother.

For the longest moment, he just stood there, staring at them all. His ice blue eyes pierced right through them, as though he could somehow see something they couldn't. Then he opened his mouth and said in a clear, serious voice, "Mama. . . Mama, we've got to do something. Dad's in trouble. He's really badly hurt. He. . . he can't breathe. . . he can't breathe!!"

"Oh Force. . . " Padme whispered after she came out of shock, staring at her son. "Oh. . . oh, Luke!!" She didn't know whether to cry and hug him or just stand there till the shock passed.

When no one moved, Luke's brow furrowed and he reached for his sister. Without even hesitating, she took his hand. "Come on!" he cried, such seriousness sounding strange coming for a child who only now spoke his first words.

And before Padme or anyone else could think how to react, he turned and ran from the room, his sister following close behind. The door didn't even have time to swing shut before Obi-wan awoke from his state of shock and followed at a dead run.

"Oh, dear Force," Padme gasped. Without warning her knees gave out and she fell to the floor, hands out to brace herself. Sabé caught her, but they both sunk to the floor, too terrified to move. I've got to get up, she thought, trying to regain control. I've got to go with them! Anakin! Oh,Anakin! Please, be alright!

Be he wasn't, she knew. He couldn't breath. She couldn't breath. Sabé's arms wrapped protectively around her, Padme took deep breaths in an attempt to calm herself, to regain control.

To keep both her and her beloved alive. . .

Luke led them, running as fast as his little legs could take him, toward the gently rolling hills and around the small groves of trees that surrounded the house. Obi-wan ducked the branches; savagely thrust his way forward, trying to run faster! Luke and Leia, despite their youth and smaller size, remained one step ahead of him, racing toward their father.

The Force guided Luke, taking them toward the hills where the Jedi practiced, some distance from the house so that their running nearly slowed. But when floating, humming orbs appeared in the distance, simply hanging motionless in the air, Kenobi picked his speed back up, determination lending him strength. He bypassed the twins and ran for the hill.

"Luke," Leia gasped as the Jedi Knight flew past them and her brother's pace slowed, "Luke, keep going! Daddy!"

"No, Leia." He responded, his tone sounding so much older it nearly scared her. "Obi-wan knows now. We need to go back." When she only looked at him, frightened and unsure, he turned and started back at a faster pace. "We need to get him to help."


When Obi-wan first caught sight of his friend, lying motionless on the ground, he thought he was too late. And a great cry rose up in his throat, one of helpless anger and bitter sorrow. Had they come so far, only for this?! He wanted to curse the Force, but the lump in his throat prevented cry of curse to escape.

He didn't stop running till he collapsed in the dirt next to his friend. Gasping, fighting back the tears, he pulled Anakin into his arms and reached out with Force, praying he would find anything, some small spark of life within the armor.

Anakin! Anakin, answer me!

And after a moment, there was a groggy, fading response, not even a word, just a brush against his mind. But it was Anakin's, and Obi-wan clung to that single hope.

Don't die on me, my friend. Please, oh, please, Force! Don't take him from me. He brought his own life force to bare, trying to share with Anakin as much as he could without putting himself in danger. That small flicker that lingered within the suit grew just a little stronger, fought just a little harder to remain.

Just a glance at the suit's systems told Obi-wan there was nothing he could do to replace them. A well aimed bolt had somehow made it across Anakin's defenses and struck a fatal blow. It had been damaged, but not beyond repair. If things had been the other way around, if it had been Anakin sitting here, holding his dying friend, he would have been able to fix it.

Obi-wan cursed himself and his lack of skills, cursed himself for staying and not coming with Skywalker, not warning him to be more careful. How many orbs had he been practicing with? A full dozen? Had the man gone mad?

No, Obi-wan thought, not mad.

You don't understand. I have to do this, Obi-wan. I have to prove myself worthy to be a Jedi again. I can't fail a second time. He had been pushing himself, had been for weeks now. Trying so hard to become better, to prove to himself he could make up for his wrongs.

Stupid! Obi-wan berated himself. Stupid, stupid not to have tried to stop him! Should have seen this coming, should have known! Should have been here!!

"Obi-wan!"

He looked up to see their speeder approached at neck-breaking speed. Sabé was at the controls, her face hard and determined, Leia next to her. Padme sat in the co-pilot's seat, her arms wrapped around her son. She looked like she had gone into shock. Luke stared at Obi-wan and his father, with those same expressionless eyes.

How, Obi-wan wondered, had the boy known?

He used the Force and was able to levitate Anakin's body into the back of the speeder and climb in after him, always keep a hand over the burning hole in the chest plate. Padme didn't need to see, she was terrified enough as it was.

"Is he. . . ?" Sabé asked, looking to him with eyes that said she wasn't as strong as she tried to act.

"If we can get to Home One fast enough, he might have a chance."

Sabé threw the speeder into top gear and the ground passed beneath them like they were in hyperspace. Hills, trees and farms passed them by in a blur. Everyone struggled to hold on, Anakin most of all.


:D :D :D

Caslia