NOTE: Sorry about the delay, rough reentry into work after my vacation in New York. ;)


Chapter Twenty-eight

"Almost done."

Laying down with his face turned away Peter acknowledged Neal with a slight nod as Neal cleaned the slowly healing cuts across his shoulders. He was getting better every day, but one of the disadvantages to that was that he no longer slept through having the bandages replaced as he once did. Neal could see that it took effort for him to remain quiet during the treatment, but he'd given up on letting him know that he didn't mind any noises he wanted to make if it helped. Neal had always found that being vocal about pain somehow helped even when there wasn't anyone else around to hear it. As he worked on the marks Neal couldn't help but marvel at the body's ability to repair itself. The cuts were still open but the margins were starting to seek one another out and the area no longer actively bled even through there was still a clear yellow seepage that needed cleaning away.

It had only been a three days since Taylor had added another antibiotic to Peter's regiment, but the difference today was night and day. He had mostly slept through the first two days, really only able to stay awake long enough to eat a small meal when he wasn't being kept awake by painful medical attention. Today he'd been awake and alert for most of the morning, although he'd barely spoken.

Neal was pleased that Peter's overall physical health was starting to finally improve, but he was worried about his increasingly introverted behavior. The night before Taylor had come back he had gotten close to having a proper conversation with Peter, it had ended with him pulling away and fearful of being treated too 'human', but it had been a start. Now he tended to reply to any question non verbally if possible or with just a word or two. He had even caught himself halfway through calling Neal 'Master' several times before correcting himself. He also kept his eyes down cast or turned away the way he had when he'd first arrived.

Neal hadn't pressure Peter with too many questions over the past few days, trying to focus on just getting him healthy and hoping that trust and self confidence would develop from there. Considering how Peter had come to his defense against Taylor Neal was confident that given some time Peter would start talking to him again. Neal wasn't sure how much of the events Peter even remembered, but he took it as a positive sign that even in a drugged state Peter hadn't turned on him. Taylor had been looking for any excuse to justify painting Neal as a villain and Peter could have easily fanned that flame.

"Okay, all done. Your back looks so much better." Neal noted as he finished the dressing. "I hope it feels better."

"Yes," Peter replied quietly "thank you."

"You're welcome. Can I get you anything?"

Neal wasn't surprised when Peter shook his head 'no'. He never took Neal up on the offer to have anything fetched for him, but he still felt the need to ask. Deciding that Peter really should drink something even if he wasn't actively complaining of being thirsty Neal retreated into the kitchen. Pouring one of the bottled waters into a glass with ice Neal brought it back over to Peter. He wait a moment and eventually Peter turned his head to glance up at him.

Spotting the glass of water Peter guessed what Neal wanted and started to try and sit up. Several days in bed had helped him heal his cuts, but it had severely negative impact on his general strength. He moved his feet off the edge of the bed, but he only got his body about half way up before stalling. Neal stood patiently and allowed Peter to try several tactics on his own for getting the rest of the way up before offering any assistance.

"May I help?"

This time Neal had chosen his words more carefully having finally learned that every time he'd ever asked 'do you need help?' it was Peter's automatic reaction to say no. Neal held his hand out for Peter to take but didn't grab him and haul him up the way he had the last time. Neal just offered him a brace to pull against. Peter tried pushing against the bed one last time before giving in and reaching out to take Neal's hand. Successful in pulling himself up Peter sat up and took a moment to adjust to the new demands on his blood pressure. Once he seemed settled Neal handed over the water. Peter sipped at the water without any real interest in it.

"We need to start getting you out of bed more often." Neal noted to break the silence. "Sound like a plan?"

Still slowly working on the water Peter nodded vacantly. Neal sighed, becoming more concerned with Peter's lack of engagement. Before Taylor Peter had always tried to remain quiet and unopinionated, but it hadn't ever taken much effort for Neal to get him talking. Even when Peter did succeed at being quiet his expression had always given him away even if it was only a brief narrowing of his eyes or frustrated shake of his head. Now he was becoming more like the traditional stereotype of an Animula, generally uninterested in his situation or fate. It was painful to watch him regress.

"Peter..." Neal hesitated "we need to talk about Taylor."

"If he wanted to turn you in he would have by now."

"That's not my concern." Neal pulled the nearby chair closer and sat down so Peter wouldn't have to look up at him, not that he'd bothered to do so. "I'm talking about the fact that ever since Taylor left you've turned in on yourself."

Neal paused, hoping that Peter would say something. Having not been asked a direct question Peter remained silent, actively avoiding eye contact.

"He took the fight right out of you." Neal continued. "How is it that in an hour Taylor did what two years of being beaten by Cheng...or rather what an entire life time of slavery couldn't do?"

Staring down at the glass in his hands Peter clearly didn't want to answer the question. He got that glazed look to his golden eyes that signified his desire to escape the situation, even if his only real option for retreat was inward. Neal waited again to see if he would answer, but all that happened was Peter became more uncomfortable. Holding the glass in one hand he reached over his shoulder he tried to scratch at the bandaged wounds but decided against it and went back to turning the water glass in circles in his hands watching the ice.

"I'm sorry," Neal gave in and apologized "you don't have to answer that. Whatever happened with Taylor is between you and him. I just want you to know that I miss the Animula that challenged me every step of the way."

"You mean the one that wanted to kill you?" Peter asked showing a small spark of his previous defiance.

"That's him." Neal smiled encouragingly. "The same one who came to my defense when I was hogtied on my floor."

"I don't...I don't remember that."

"You were pretty heavily drugged."

Peter's mood instantly darkened once more. Neal swore at himself for bringing the incident up. It was clear that Peter had taken away the lesson that even the most well intentioned humans could only be trusted up to the point where they wanted something from him. Taylor could have just as easily asked for the information he had been looking for, there was no excuse for him to just take it.

"Peter, I know that Taylor is just one more in a long line of people who have blatantly abused you and your trust, but please don't judge me on his or anyone else's actions. I want you to be happy and I want us to be able to work together, but that's going to take trust on both sides."

Peter brought his eyes up and stared at Neal, which Neal took a good sign, it was the first real eye contact Peter had made with him since Taylor left. Putting down the melting glass of ice water on the night stand Peter looked around the small apartment. The way he lingered on certain sights such as the kitchen table that was still covered in medical supplies, and the area on the floor where he had pinned Neal and nearly killed him gave Neal the impression that he was going over both his own and Neal's actions over the past week that they'd been together. So far they hadn't done the best job of working well with one another or even communicating very effectively, but at the same time they hadn't killed one another either and both had ever opportunity to do so. Eventually Peter brought his attention back to his unlikely Master.

"I want to trust you, Neal, I do...but how can I trust someone who lies for a living?"

"I don't have a good answer for that."

"I can't be the first person who has asked."

"You're not." Neal admitted. "Everyone I've ever tried to have a serious relationship with has eventually asked me that question or some very close variation on it."

"What do they do when you don't have a 'good answer'?"

"They leave me."