It's been a while, sorry about that. This snippet doesn't relate to any of the others in this little collection. Early, uncertain Ianto, probably early S2.


Ianto woke suddenly as the pillow shifted beneath him. He bolted upright, perplexed that he seemed mostly there already, with dire thoughts of sentient stuffing sparking through his brain, only to feel Jack's hand soothing across his shoulders.

"Sorry," Jack apologized. "Had to move. My arm was going numb." Ianto blinked up, awash in confusion as Jack's mouth curved into a soft smile so very different from his usual grin. "Pity, really. I was gonna carry you to bed and tuck you in like the cute little boy you are right now," Jack continued, still smiling that same smile.

Ianto felt his face heat. This wasn't how the evening was supposed to go. There'd been Weevil hunting, then…erm….Weevil hunting, after which Jack announced the night was still young and so was Ianto and took him to dinner at a dingy restaurant which evidently spent its budget on quality ingredients instead of décor, where they both ate far more than was good for them.

It had been a great night, deserving of a great ending, which was why Ianto had invited Jack in 'for coffee'. Which he'd actually made, so as not to drown in too many clichés in one night, but mostly so he wouldn't fall asleep before the 'main event'. Only apparently that's exactly what he'd done. On Jack's shoulder, no less. Ianto swung his legs to the floor as the blush spread to his neck, and sent a hand groping across the coffee table, hoping he'd had the sense to put his mug down before passing out.

"I caught it," Jack said smugly, pushing the now-cool mug into Ianto's hand.

Ianto brought the mug to his lips. Lukewarm, which was worse than cold, but he drank it anyway to give him time to work out what to say to salvage the evening. "I'm…I'm sorry, Jack," he stammered eventually, having come up blank. "I must have…I guess I was…"

Jack waved a hand dismissively. "Worn out," he said, with enough conceit to start Ianto's eyes rolling, which was much better. Jack rose smoothly and extended a hand. "C'mon then, let's get you to bed."

Now that was more like it, Ianto thought, feeling a sense of the world settling back into its assigned pattern as he let Jack pull him to his feet and lead him towards the bedroom. Jack waiting until he woke up in order to secure another round before he left was far more in line with the general scheme of things than Jack sitting still until he lost feeling in his arm just so Ianto could sleep. Upright. On the sofa. When they were supposed to be…oh, having a witty conversation of some kind to fill the time before Jack could, in fact, instigate the final encounter of the evening and sneak off to the Hub while Ianto slept.

Not that Jack always did the sneaking off part. Sometimes Jack was still there in the morning, unsubtly nudging Ianto awake, or more rarely still asleep beside him. Ianto had put those occasions down to an exceptionally busy day beforehand coupled with the Rift being quiet overnight, which combined to give Jack the option of hanging around to deliver his specialized form of wake up call.

They reached the bedroom without further discussion, with Jack's arm wrapped around Ianto in something part support, part embrace.

Ianto was already in the T-shirt and track pants he customarily wore to bed so he slid beneath the duvet and waited with what he told himself was anticipation, but felt suspiciously like resignation, for Jack to remove one or both garments.

Ianto bit back a yawn as Jack approached, turning it into a smile and stretching instead, because Jack loved watching him stretch, all the while trying to ignore the discomforting awareness that he'd actually welcome an alert that sent Jack off with a kiss and a wink and a promise to make it up to him. Just at the moment, the prospect of more sleep was more alluring than the prospect of more Jack, but Ianto balked at admitting it.

He also balked at admitting, even to himself, that he'd rather pretend enthusiasm than risk Jack taking a rebuff as license to seek a different partner. If he didn't admit it, he wouldn't have to explore why the idea bothered him so much, which it shouldn't. They weren't exclusive. At least, he didn't think so. Not that they'd actually discussed it or anything, but surely that would be another of those labels Jack hated so much.

Ianto often told himself there was nothing wrong with accepting what was offered instead of seeking something more, something deeper. Something that might make him feel treasured instead of convenient. Something like he'd had with Lisa – but he wasn't ready for that anyway. This thing he had with Jack was the ideal compromise. Friendship, not a relationship. All the physical benefits without the risks associated with handing his emotional wellbeing over to someone else. When he was ready for more, Ianto would go looking for someone who wanted that, too. There was absolutely no point in contemplating what it would be like if that person was Jack, because it wouldn't be. When the time came Jack would most likely send him off with a smile and wish him the best of luck. Probably start telling him not to let it drift. And Ianto was fine with that, or he would be.

Amidst all the other thoughts he assured himself he wasn't having, Ianto wondered if you could actually convince yourself you weren't lying to yourself…..and decided that, no, that surely wasn't possible. Which meant he was simply being honest with himself. Knowing his own mind. Or something.

Anyway, it wasn't as though it was a sacrifice going along with Jack's appetites. Far from it. More frequently a delight than a chore, and for goodness sake real couples feigned interest for each other all the time so surely this was no different. No, actually of course it was different – he'd just expended considerable mental effort convincing himself of that, hadn't he?

Oh the hell with it. He was in bed with an intergalactic playboy. There were probably hundreds if not thousands of beings who'd change places with him in a second, and he was going to enjoy it. So there. Ianto ordered his brain to shut the hell up and let his hormones drive for a bit.

Ianto pushed himself into a sitting position and leaned into Jack's arms as they opened, letting his face rest on Jack's neck, not for a second considering that the position meant Jack wouldn't notice when yawned again.

After a brief hug, however, Jack merely pressed a kiss to Ianto's forehead and pulled away. Ianto blinked up at him, frowning vaguely as he concluded that Jack must have noticed that last yawn and reached to pull him back.

Jack caught the flailing hand in his own and lay it gently back down onto the bed. "You need to get some more sleep, Ianto," he said firmly. "It's been a hell of a day and we've got an early start tomorrow if we're going to get to Flat Holm and back before the team trickles in."

Ianto settled obediently back into the mattress and informed himself in no uncertain terms that he wasn't going to watch Jack leave.

Jack bent to tuck the duvet more firmly around Ianto and dropped another kiss onto the top of his head. "I'll be in soon," he said, unleashing a yawn of his own. "I just want to catch the rest of that movie. One of my old favorites and I've never been able to find it on DVD. You don't mind do you?"

Ianto shook his head, partly in response and partly in confusion, and lay blinking at the ceiling.

Jack had left the bedroom door ajar, so Ianto could hear the muted sound of the television, even the clink of a mug scraping along the coffee table as Jack re-settled himself. Jack really was watching the end of his film. It wasn't an excuse to sneak off. He really wasn't leaving.

All of which woke Ianto up far more thoroughly than a dozen caresses. He lay frozen, eyes still fixed unseeingly on the ceiling as he tried to bring order to the blizzard of implications whirling about in his mind.

Jack was staying the night, without the expectation of further sex. Now, or in the morning. There'd be no time, considering they always caught the first ferry. Just the sort of thing liable to shatter those protective illusions he wasn't admitting to, if he wasn't careful.

Ianto was still awake, mind still buzzing, when the television went silent, to be replaced by the sound of running water and the clanking of crockery as Jack washed their mugs.

He was still awake when Jack dropped his clothes into the laundry hamper instead of tucking them back into his duffel or even leaving them on the floor. Ianto watched through half-closed eyes as Jack tugged a drawer open, extracted a pair of boxers and an old white T-shirt and took them with him into the bathroom. The ceiling got another few minutes of intense contemplation while Ianto tried to remember exactly how long Jack had had a drawer in his bedroom.

Or his own spot in the bathroom cabinet. The sounds of smile maintenance drifted under the bathroom door as Jack brushed his teeth with Ianto's spare brush. Well, the one which used to be spare until Jack started using it. But Ianto had found cinnamon flavored floss, too, when he'd always preferred plain himself, and the jars of hair product had been multiplying without the assistance of Ianto's wallet. And he hadn't noticed, or maybe he'd stopped himself from noticing, because hope was something you couldn't afford when you'd lost the love of your life once already.

The bathroom door opened, leaving Jack framed in the doorway, backlit for a moment before he reached up to switch the light off. Deliberate posing, Ianto identified, just in case I'm awake, and rolled his face into the pillow so Jack wouldn't see him smiling.

He pretended to be asleep when Jack slid in beside him, because there was too much thinking to be done before he could risk saying any of the things bursting to be spoken. And because if Jack knew he was awake things might get physical after all, and the seeds germinating in Ianto's battered heart would never know whether it was safe to flower.

He nearly fell asleep when Jack's lips pressed against his hair, lightly, carefully, before the mattress dipped as Jack tucked himself up against Ianto's back with a sigh of content.

He wasn't dreaming when Jack whispered something that sounded suspiciously like the 'L' word and draped an arm carefully around Ianto's waist. The arm was never there in the mornings. Maybe tomorrow it would be. If he was quick enough. If he was brave enough.

If he was brave enough for both of them.

Ianto woke slowly, carefully, with Jack's cheek still resting against his hair, and grabbed hold of the arm around his waist before Jack could notice he was awake and pull it away.

They didn't make the first ferry after all.

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