Chapter Twenty-Eight:

Endings


"I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious Ambiguity."–Gilda Radner

Disclaimer: I do not own Avatar.


When I became conscious it was done with a hope that it had been a bad dream. I would wake up and Genji would be alive. I was only fooling myself. The fact still remained that he was now dead.

I had killed him.

The part that made me want wanted to laugh hysterically like a madman was that I had ditched him at the Earth Kingdom port so he would be safe. And…and that the first person I had ever killed was my own friend.

I did not blame him entirely for following me. Love makes people do stupid things, just as I had now witnessed. How had he found me at the Center? The place is not exactly open to public knowledge. I would never get to know that answer for it had gone with him. It was that thought that brought me crashing back down to reality. I pushed away my guilt and horror as I opened my eyes to observe the cell I had expected to see.

Small. Barely enough room to walk. Becoming gray rock. No windows. Iron bars.

A typical cell.

I sat up and felt dizzy. The tiny room spun around me in a gray blur. I really needed to stop making it a habit of bashing my head in. Otherwise I might end of up like that oaf Sokka. That prospect did not humor me. The smallness of the room did not help. I felt as if I could not breathe! Yet the room I had shared with Hayase and Asako on the ship had not been much bigger… I did a breathing exercise. The cell returned to its size in my vision. The thought of Hayase struck a pin in the hollow of my chest.

I missed her. Even Asako. Master Pakku. My training. I missed my life there. Dreams of them had come to me while had stayed with Narimi. The thought of Huyu only led to the thought of Genji. Would he hate me? But Genji had meant for me to tell Huyu that he had died for me. What a cruel lie. Perhaps not for him or for his brother. I was the one who knew the truth and would not have Huyu's hatred if I told the lie. But I deserved to have his eyes, the same as Genji's, glaring at me with hatred. I knew I did not truly desire that, but I had killed Genji.

I am a murder!

What would Enlai say? His dark blue eyes seemed to stare at me now. "You didn't mean to, Sayuri," his voice said in my mind, "Don't let this destroy you. Not after all the progress you have made!" He was not here, I knew that. It was only my imagination. The comfort and confirmation that had existed in his non-existent voice had still brought an uneasy peace to me. Hours were spent with my tormented and turbulent thoughts…


Eventually someone came at long last. I was sitting on the single bench in the cell. My clothes had been changed when I was unconscious and strangely to one of the outfits Narimi had given me. My bag was nowhere to be seen. My right hand lacked the wrappings I had worn. Before they had been soaked with blood…

Now I hid my disfigured hand from my sight. There was a single door on the other side of the room, outside of the iron bars. It closed shut with a quiet click as Keitaro entered the room. He walked over to the bars and looked at me with his dark eyes. "Who was he?" He asked coldly.

I stayed sitting and watched his dark eyes. "A friend."

"Why did you kill him?"

I bowed my head in shame. "It…it was an accident," I responded, unable to keep the mixture of guilt and revulsion leaking into my voice. "You trained me well." Slowly I looked up at Keitaro's unmoving gaze. "What did you do with him?"

"His remains have been burnt in the fire, as is tradition."

I did not know how the Water Tribe took care of their deceased. I was quite sure that our way would not be…suitable to them. Fire was not their element. "He was not Fire Nation," Keitaro continued calmly, "Was he Water Tribe?"

"It does not matter now," I replied tensely, "He is dead."

"The Guardian will not be pleased with your answer," Keitaro warned. His dark eyes revealed nothing.

"What is to become of me?"

Keitaro's face twitched for a sliver of a second. It was as if our conversation before had not occurred, where he had from his perspective poured his heart out. "I do not know. It is up to the Guardian." He spoke to me as if he did not know me. As if I was an enemy almost. Keitaro left the room without another word.

I sat there in the unfeeling cell. I thought of Genji. Narimi. Even my…the prince. But mostly, my thoughts drifted towards Enlai.


I do not know how long was in that cell for. I slept when I had need and exercised as much I could as the space would warrant. Seven different meals of boring simplicity were brought to me by a silent man. I did not attempt to speak to him nor him to me. He was of good build, but plain faced. He had been trained by the Society, that much was evident. I was surprised when the man came without a meal the eighth time I saw him. He opened the iron door to my cell without a word. I stood up immediately, ready to fight…

Of course, I had no weapon and with my crippled right hand…I was not much of an opponent. There was no water nearby and I did not plan on waterbending. There was a hope that Keitaro had not revealed that. The man shook his head and beckoned me to follow.

He ended up leading me to the western wall. I had only been here once…when I had met the Guardian. A midday sun greeted my eyes. The light hurt them, making them water instantaneously. My eyes had grown used to the weak torchlight of the cell. I ascended up the gray stone stairs. The man had left me at the bottom. There was no possible way to escape. They are some of the best at what they do after all. It was like the same before in an eerie way I came upon the Guardian at the top.

She wore similar midnight clothing as to the one time I had met her years ago. The same short hair cut. She leaned up against the stone ledge, staring out at the green ridges that encased the Center. Keiya was unchanged, at least to in my eyes. She had that same beautiful, but deadly air about her person. I approached her precariously and bowed. "There is no need for formalities," Her silken voice purred. Keiya's light golden gaze analyzed me as she looked in my direction. "Now that you know the truth, cousin."

I looked at her startled. So Keitaro had told her than, but how much? "You have changed very much," She went on with a tilt of her head, "You were planning on leaving the Fire Nation for good…you did not intend to return to the Crown Prince. Why?"

I turned myself away from her searching eyes. "I am not who I was. I have found a life outside of this one." I looked back at Keiya. She smiled like a pleased predator.

"Interesting," She mused with a humored tone, "That is very interesting."

She was unpredictable…something that I did not like about her for she made me feel like a turtle duck she could step on without any secondary thought. I stared up at her with what I hoped was a brave look. "What do you plan to do with me?"

Keiya grinned across her beautiful face. The look was not a comforting one. "What do you think I should do with you?" She questioned me in return.

"As the Guardian, you should have me imprisoned or killed for my betrayal," I stated. My eyes did not leave hers. "But as a woman who once loved, you should let me go."

I almost jumped at the sound of Keiya's honeyed laugh. She lifted her head back and laughed loudly. "Daring at last! You were so quiet and obedient the last time I saw you. Look at you now, all bristled to fight for your freedom."

I did not respond, but waited for she would speak again.

"Love is a dangerous thing. Do you still want it, even if it can destroy you?" She asked quietly. Her golden eyes gleamed with a peculiar shine.

"I will do what I want," I answered her neutrally; "I make my own path."

"If I let you go, you know what that means?"

I nodded.

Keiya grinned dangerously. "I did not think you would be one to rebel. I suppose my estimation of you was mistaken." She casually gestured toward the stairs. "You are free to leave."

"My belongings?"

"Ah, yes." Keiya pulled something out of her clothing. It was my…the necklace Enlai had made for me! "This is an interesting necklace," She noted. She knew what it meant. Keiya tossed it at me and I caught it with ease. "I hope he is worth it." She added softly, but instantly returned to her cool airs. "A man will be at the bottom of the stairs with the rest of your things. He will escort you out of the Center."

I bowed and headed for the stairs. "Nira?" I turned to look back at the Guardian. "See him and then leave. Do not come back to the Fire Nation. Ever." I nodded and left without another word. Keiya meant every word she had said. I wondered if she had once been different for she clearly felt little now. If at all. Only one thing awaited me now in the Fire Nation...I would see him one last time and after that…

I still did not know how this would end.


A/N: Sorry for such a short chapter. I have them all planned out to end it at thirty, so the next two might be on the shorter side as well. Another apology to make for I noticed a mistake I made in the last chapter. In the very last part I wrote that the wrappings on her left hand were soaked with blood. I meant to write her right hand. Sorry for the mistake! And as I always write, thanks for reading and please review!