Hey people!

Um... not much to tell, except...

OMG! 200 REVIEWS! A-FUCKING-SCHMAZING!

I love you all!

Randomness: Rammstein, "Zwitter".

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

Suit Square

"Naruto!"

He looked up. It was a pretty day, blurry and green and bright. Mama was smoking, her hair tied up into a messy bun and wisps of her blonde hair sticking up from the crown of her head. She was wearing her favorite bathrobe, green with pink elephants, and the lawn of the family-block, scruffy and dried out, looked faded compared to its bright colors. She was sitting cross-legged, her golden skin glowing in the sun. Her belly was straining against the robe's sash.

"Naruto, come here." She had a smoker's voice, and always spoke as though she was teasing. Naruto's daddy called her voice 'cynical', but Naruto didn't know what that meant. He kind of understood 'sarcastic', though, and Daddy also called her that.

He obeyed her, leaving his tractor on the grass and hurrying over to her. She put her cigarette between her lips –soft and red and dry, he knew – and pulled him onto her lap, settling him into the crook of her knee and arranging him just right. Then she took one of his hands and guided it to her big belly. "Feel that?"

He frowned. He didn't feel anything –

His eyes widened. Something was pushing against the soft cloth beneath his palm, prodding at him. "Wow!"

Mama laughed around her cigarette. "Yeah, it is wow. That's your little sister, Goldilocks."

Naruto wrinkled his nose. He didn't like it when she called him Goldilocks. He stared down at the swell of his Mama's belly. "Can she hear me?"

Mama shook her head, blonde strands flying as she laughed her full, scratchy laugh. "No, of course not. She's much too little, and her ears aren't finished yet."

Naruto looked up at his mother, confused. The curve of her long throat glowed indistinctly against the background of yellow grass and gray cement. "Finished?" He reached up to feel his own ears.

Mama covered his hands, and cupped his ears as well. "Exactly. You see, I have to make your sister. Like I made you. It's hard work, let me tell you, and it takes a while. And she's not finished yet." She moved one warm, dry palm to Naruto's belly. He was wearing a t-shirt, blue on orange.

The smoke from her cigarette stung his eyes a bit, and he felt her hand rub circles on his stomach. "See, I started making you from the tummy out. And it's the same with your sister. Your ears are pretty far from your tummy, aren't they?"
Naruto nodded. "Uh-huh."

"Yeah, they are. So your ears weren't finished for a while because I had to make the rest of you first. And the little one in here... I'm currently making her eyes, I think. Her ears are gonna be started in a few days."

Naruto grinned. "Then she'll be able to hear me!"

Mama laughed again, and one hand pulled Naruto closer while the other plucked the cigarette from between her lips. "Yeah, Goldilocks. Then she'll be able to hear you."

"Mama! Don't call me that!"

"Why not? I like 'Goldilocks'. It's a good name for you. You're curious, and you're sneaky."

"Mama!"

She laughed, her tawny skin folding around her mouth in deep lines of laughter. Her breasts pressed against his arm as she hugged him again and placed a kiss on the tip of his nose. "Come on, Naruto. We should go back up. Cook something for Daddy when he comes back... damn, but I've become a real housewife... shocking, don't you think, kiddo?"

Naruto shrugged. He didn't understand much of what his Mama said once she started talking in that angry voice.

Mama grinned suddenly and shooed him off her lap. "You're right, Naruto. I shouldn't be all mopey. It' my own fault for marrying such a square... believer in the State, my ass. Come on, we'll make fish stew."

Naruto snatched up his tractor and ran to catch up with his mother, who was already almost at the family-block's entrance. She had started a new cigarette, and smiled down at him when he grabbed her hand. They stepped into the cool building, and the glow of the sun followed them up the first speckled linoleum flight of stairs.

°

He hurt so bad.

His Daddy was asleep next to him.

He hurt all over, and he felt sticky and scratchy. His butt hurt the worst.

Daddy stank of the stuff he always drank these days. The smell permeated the whole bedroom, the windows closed and the light nearly non-existent from behind thick curtains.

He hated this house. It was empty, the area around it was empty, and there was no Mama. It had one bedroom, a kitchen, a bathroom, and a cellar.

He was afraid of the cellar. Daddy liked taking him to the cellar when he had had a lot of the stuff out of the brown bottles.

He wriggled out of his Daddy's grasp, and hurried down to the dark kitchen. It stank here too, the same too-sweet smell of the yellow stuff out of the brown glass bottles. He could barely walk, but he'd gotten used to the pain by now.

Mama had been gone for a long time – she had never 'finished' his little sister, and they had both disappeared. Daddy had never explained it to him, and Naruto had never asked. He knew that it had something to do with the things Mama would say when she was angry – stuff about the State and 'squares' and 'propaganda' and 'authoritarianism'.

Daddy was always stinking of the drink these days, and he hurt Naruto badly. He called him Hana, Mama's name, and he did weird stuff in bed at night. It always hurt, and Naruto didn't know what it was good for.

But it was better to be nice to Daddy. Nice and quiet and obedient.

He put water on, and got the little pills from the cupboard that Daddy always took for his headache in the mornings. Naruto didn't know if they really helped, though. Daddy would wash it down with more yellow stuff, and somehow his head wouldn't get better.

Naruto looked at the clock. It was eight, and he knew that he should be going to school.

He had been put into the nearest school to this empty and dead place, but he almost never went. Daddy hurt him more if he left the house besides to shop, and he never understood anything anyway. He was in fourth grade, ten years old, and he hadn't gone to school much for the five of his school life. Fractions were way over his head.

The State people would come sometimes, and tell Daddy to get Naruto to school. But he never did, and the people would just come back a few months later. Nothing ever changed, and Naruto wasn't expecting it to do so.

He froze as heavy footsteps sounded outside the room in the corridor, and something in his chest cramped up as his Daddy lumbered into the kitchen.

He was a massive man, and Naruto could remember when he had been muscular and Mama had always called him 'Rambo'. Naruto hadn't understood that, and he still didn't. But now Daddy surely was no 'Rambo'. His belly was almost as big as Mama's had been before she vanished, and the tattoos of the State crest on his arms were stretched over flab. He had snarly brown curls all over his head, and black eyes that seemed to have grown smaller... at least, Naruto remembered them as much bigger and warmer.

"Hana, where's the fucking coffee?"

Naruto just pointed to the mug. Daddy scared him so much these days... It hurt in his chest whenever the man's huge shadow fell over him, and his breath went all short and fast.

Daddy took his mug, the pills, and grabbed a brown bottle from the pile of crates in the kitchen corner. "Get me some breakfast," he growled.

Naruto just nodded.

Daddy left the kitchen, and Naruto listened to his footsteps until they stopped, probably in the bathroom.

He hurt.

He squashed a few cockroaches on his search for something edible. Sure, he tried to keep the house clean, but Daddy always threw up in the kitchen and there were still remnants of food left here from a long time ago, stuck between the machines and beneath the counters --

Naruto just couldn't get all of it out or away, and the cockroaches liked the kitchen. There was a huge nest of them behind the fridge, which leaked badly and belched out weird liquids from time to time. Naruto had discovered it by accident, on one of his many tries to get rid of the insects. He'd taken a good long look at the roiling mass of black carapaces and twitching feelers, and then hurriedly pushed the fridge back into place.

He found cheese, eggs that didn't smell too bad, and some sausage. So.. omelette.

He shuffled over to the stove and set to 'work'.

He was ten years old, and he really, really wanted Daddy to remember his name.

°

"Oy, Naruto! You're out late!"

Naruto turned and grinned at his friend. "Oh yeah, Jiraiya wanted some favors. I'll be out all night now, though."

Haku chuckled softly. He was wearing his satin, fake-fur trimmed maroon coat. It was open over low-cut white jeans and a black turtleneck. His right hand held a long black cigarette, and his lips pursed around it as he smoked with a natural grace that spoke of long addiction.

It was cold but dry, and the sky above them was black and smog-veiled. Slum Street was a mess of cars standing bumper-to-bumper, lining each side of the road and honking their horns to attract whores.

Naruto looked around. He could feel the black alley that led to Jiraiya's brothel yawning menacingly behind him.

The whores on Slum Street all looked cheap or tired in some way. Skirts and pants were plastic twenty-minicel-crap, and shirts were secondhand. Underwear was a big no-no, and the pimps were watching attentively from their alleys, their discreet little cameras trained on their 'employees'.

All the windows in the apartment buildings were closed, and no lights were on. The bars were packed just now, and many whores made a little tour through the establishments to look for prospective clients.

The street was narrow, and scum – condoms, booze, glass and worse – collected at the sides of it. The side walk was a cracked, uneven affair that had grass sprouting through it absolutely everywhere. The whole street stank of stale sweat, sex, drugs and disease.

A long red car muscled its way to the curb, and the guys inside honked their horn. A tinted window rolled down, and a dude with a mustache, around ten earrings on each ear, and a liter of gel smeared into his hair stuck his pock-marked face out. "Yo, hotness!" He screeched at Haku.

Haku flipped his long, straight hair over his shoulder, took a drag from his cigarette, and slowly sauntered up to the guy. "Yeah?"

"How much do you cost, sexy?"

Haku flashed him his sex smile. "Three for a blowjob, five for a fuck, and two for each kinky thing you want from me..." his voice was smooth and melodious, and oozed sex.

The dude gave Haku a dazed little grin, and muttered, "Get in."

Haku laughed softly, gave Naruto a nonchalant wave, and obeyed Mustache-Man.

Naruto waited for his first customer with no small amount of impatience. He was sore from Jiraiya's earlier treatment, but he knew from past experiences that the sooner he got a client, the better. Because the less time that lay between Jiraiya's bed and the customers' cars, the less it hurt. Jiraiya had explained it once, while he was in a good mood – something with muscles and relaxing and stretching.

The nearest whores were a few feet away. To Naruto's left was a girl that also belonged to Jiraiya. Her name was Kin, and she was a runaway like Naruto. He'd seen her scars in the showers a couple times. But unlike Naruto, she was a 'knife junkie. He could see that she needed a hit, her hands trembling and her eyes flitting from one car to the other in a panicked flight. She kept her tubes of 'knife in her purse with her condoms and the rest of her paraphernalia, but taking a hit now during rush hour would most certainly earn her a beating. Crystalknife was paralyzing for the first fifteen minutes after the hit, and an OD got you ready for the morgue within milliseconds.

An as-yet-unattended car angled into the line at the curb, and Naruto pulled his coat close to himself before moving towards it. He bent over the window, grinning his own seductive smile. The window rolled down, and he felt the warmth from the car's heating on his face.

The driver murmured a request that sent panic skittering down Naruto's spine, but he just kept on smiling and jumped in. Jiraiya was watching, and a misstep could cost him the few freedoms he had, like being allowed to go out during the day...

The dude took him around the next corner, where the hour motels started, and parked in the underground lot of the cheapest, a place called 'Mona Lisa's Secrets' that was best known for its cockroaches and semen stains. Naruto got out with him, followed him to a room, and got the shit over with. With the fucking, the whip, the chains, and the toys, he technically got eleven chips out of this. Practically, he got one, and Jiraiya got ten.

So yeah.

But at least he wasn't being mistaken for his mother, and fucked as her.

His escape from his father had unspectacular, and he didn't like remembering much of past shit. Remembering was bad.

He sometimes thought of his mother, and his un-'finished' sister. Otherwise, Slum consisted of Haku for him. And maybe Jiraiya's good moods.

Naruto got back to his usual spot, and scanned the curb for the next dude. His ass hurt from the last one's toys, but the rawness would just get worse with the night, and it made no sense to dwell on it.

Actually, it didn't make much sense to dwell on anything.

°

"Hey, do you have some space under here? I need a place to sleep."

The girls looked up from their card game, the couple at the back stopped kissing to stare at him, and the black-haired kid on the mattress right in front of him gave him a pissed-off glance. The last kid looked like he was sleeping.

Naruto shifted slightly. It was almost spring, and getting slightly warmer. The sky was a late-afternoon bluish-purple, and Whore Street was quiet but for the murmurs of the sex workers and the sound of televids from the apartment houses. It seemed much cleaner, nicer than Slum.

The black-haired girl spoke first. "I... guess. As long as you have something to sleep on."

The awning was pink, the signs were pink, and the doors and windows were black. It was the shop from Hell, but Naruto liked it... kind of.

He grinned. "Thanks a lot, I really appreciate it."

The kid in front of him pinned him with a red-marked glare. "I'll let you sleep on my mattress tonight. But only tonight."

The blonde girl gasped loudly, and asked, "Sasuke! No, it's okay, he can sleep with us--"

Naruto plopped down on the mattress next to the other kid, and sighed. "Thanks, man."

"Tch. Whatever, dobe."

"What?"

Sasuke just smirked, and lit a cigarette.

°

Gaara had gone to shower without saying anything else.

Naruto cleaned up the stuff from their coffee and wiped down the counters. He organized the fridge, took all the things out of the cupboards – not that there was much -- , cleaned them out, put the stuff back in, systematically washed and dried each piece of cutlery and every single dish or glass that Gaara owned, cleaned the table, and started on the floor. He got to the table legs with the cleaning rag, leaving a shiny wet expanse between the white of the wall and the table, before dropping the cloth and falling back onto the palms of his hands, his legs sprawled out in front of him.

He glared up at the window. The floor was cold against his bare legs, and his hands were wet and wrinkly from all the washing and wiping and cleaning he'd been doing. The sleeves of Gaara's sweatshirt were rolled up around his elbows.

He blew a strand of hair out of his eyes. The were tremors going through his arms.

Well, it wasn't as if it came as a surprise... Gaara was simply very --

... possessive...

Naruto hadn't minded yet, and he still wasn't sure whether he did now.

On one hand, it was nice to think that Gaara cared about him – well, sort of, anyway – and that he wanted Naruto to stop working. When Naruto looked at it like that, it made him feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

On the other... Naruto had changed a lot of things for Gaara, and whoring had been his life for years now. It had been like the last unchanged thing about his life at Whore now that Gaara was in the picture.

And it scared Naruto that he felt as though he could easily give up on it.

Mama had been a strong woman, and when Naruto looked back now – as he did very rarely, remembering still felt kind of achy in his chest – he could basically piece it all together. Mama had been a dissident of sorts, and she'd given up all of it for his father. Naruto could very dimly remember a few scenes, with many people and loud voices and big red signs – demonstrations. Mama had been really involved in stuff like that, but Naruto's father had worked at the State electricity plant and swiftly rising through the ranks. He had been a firm believer in the State, and hadn't allowed Mama to ruin his career.

Mama had completely changed her life for Naruto's father... but in the end, her rebellion had still caught up with her – Naruto was pretty sure that her disappearance had something to do with the State. He shook the thoughts away. They were irrelevant; what worried him was that, looking back, he knew what happened when you changed too much for someone. Mama had done it, and she'd been unhappy.

He shivered, and slowly got up, picking up the rag.

Now the only question was whether he'd already changed too much for Gaara, or whether he could still do this --

Fuck, he loved Gaara, and he knew that he needed him. But this... was going in the deep end. Stopping his whoring?

He shivered again, and moved out into the corridor. The shower was no longer running, though the door of the bathroom was still closed. It was dark in the narrow hall, and he stared at the door of the bathroom with thoughts roiling through his mind.

And what exactly did Gaara mean? Did he want Naruto to just stop whoring, and go on living at Whore? Or did he... did he want Naruto to live with him?

Naruto imagined the second case for a second, and almost fell over. He kind of felt like laughing his head off, but a big part of him also went completely HOLY SHIT! I WANT THAT!

Argh!

This was getting so damn complicated!

Naruto hadn't actually given the 'future' much thought yet. He had been content with coming here each night, feeling warm and good next to Gaara and leaving again the next day. Wanting more could have gotten him disappointed, and in the worst case dead.

So what did the redhead mean?

Naruto chewed his lip, pondering that question.

The bathroom door opened as if on a cue.

Gaara was dressed in his jeans and nothing else, his hair sticking up into all directions and his eyes flat as he stared at Naruto. A towel was slung around his neck, the red cloth contrasting with his pale, muscular chest. His lips were set in their usual grim line.

Naruto sighed inwardly. He was so fucking sexy.

Gaara looked at him for a while, his eyes heavy and challenging, before stepping into the bedroom.

Naruot followed him and watched him pull on a black t-shirt. He was still holding the wet rag in one hand, and his legs were cold in the chill of the room's open windows. The light filtered in over the futon, the comforter tossed into a messy wad at one end of it. The tatami glowed in the pallid sunlight, and Naruto's bag lay next to his discarded clothes from the night before. Gaara's own outfit was scattered around the futon as well.

"Hey, Gaara," he started.

The redhead looked up from searching for something in the closet – boxers, maybe, or other pants – and fixed Naruto with his coldly disinterested look. He shifted slightly, as if to say, get on with it.

The blonde looked right back at him. It was still unnerving, the green depths still dragging him under --

But he'd gotten accustomed to it.

"About... what you said. In the kitchen. What do you want?"

Gaara snarled a bit, impatiently, and said softly, "What I said."

Naruto threw his hands into the air. "Well, yeah! But do you mean that you want me here?"

Gaara half-shrugged, and he gave Naruto a no duh – well, okay, maybe that was exaggerated – look.

Naruto glared at him. "I mean, do you want me here? As in, all the time? Living here?"

Gaara ignored him.

The blonde growled and went into the bathroom to wash out the rag.

He just wanted to get it! To know whether Gaara wanted...

... Naruto there. Always. Like a real, functional, romance couple. Like... well, a marriage was too far-fetched. But at the very least like a real honest-to-God relationship.

The more Naruto thought about it, the more he liked the idea. Now, if only Gaara would agree --

What if he didn't? What if Naruto had just overstepped his boundaries? What if--

No more what ifs!

He washed the cloth out viciously. The bathroom still smelled of the warm wet of the shower and Gaara's shower gel. The mirror was fogged-up and he could only see a section of his cheek and nose clearly. His eyes were really bright because of his anger, and the blue pierced through the moisture.

Mama's eyes had been a faded aquamarine --

He cursed under his breath. What was wrong with him?

Gaara's statement – order! And the kiss! The goddamn kiss! – had completely thrown him off... track, or whatever. He had Mama's rough hands in his mind, the smell of her garlic-drenched salads, her cheap stinking cigarettes. Daddy was also there, heavy and loud and painful. Jiraiya, all bark and no bite, unless he got into the drink or Naruto didn't make enough money – Haku, smelling of cheap perfume and coconut shampoo, his hair sifting over his shoulders in heavy waves of black silk and his eyes warm and deep --

Tenten, sarcastic and mean and loving the vodka – where was she from, anyway? -- , Ino, harsh laughter and lacy underwear in the cold. Shikamaru still, silent and angry, the pale silhouette of his prone form in the bluish nights. Shino and Kiba lovey-dovey in their corner under their big brown blanket, Akamaru, Iruka's deep voice, Kakashi's perverted books, the shock of his bright hair.

Sasuke's cold voice and the absent-minded smile on his face that was so new but fit him so well, his cigarettes stinking up the Konoha and the red wheels spinning fast in amusement, deep in the black of his eyes --

Temari and Kankuro. Sharp and hard-faced –where had they grown up? When? -- , their humor as sharp as the blade of Gaara's favorite knife --

Gaara.

Ice.

Greens between turquoise and emerald, skin smooth and unmarked except for scars that glowed silver in blue darkness over pale --

The silences, comfortable and full of things that Naruto never really tried to decipher, because where would the mystery be then?

All the little things, the vodka, the way he said Naruto's name, the iciness of his speaking, the way he hated too much sugar in his coffee and wet towels.

The hard, even planes of his face and the scar on his temple. The callouses on his hands when they slid over Naruto's cuts, drew rough circles on his abdomen. The muscles shifting under his skin, and the way he looked in the shower with his hair bleeding an unruly red under the water.

Naruto glanced over at the shower stall. Gaara had surprised him once, gotten out and then turned the water on very cold. Naruto had chased the redhead into the kitchen and shouted at him for a few seconds, before realizing that they were both naked and Gaara was looking at him like a hungry lion --

He chuckled, and then grinned at himself in the mirror. The moisture had bled away, and he could see his whole face and one shoulder now. The rag lay in the sink, the water was still running cold over his fingers, and the scars on his cheeks glowed in the still steamy air of the bathroom.

Stop whoring?

He shook his head and stared at himself. He was still laughing a little, and one of his teeth was poking out over his lip. It always did that.

He turned off the water and hung the rag up to dry before going off to look for Gaara.

The redhead was finishing his coffee in the kitchen. His eyes slid over to Naruto when the blonde stepped into the room, and he put the mug down.

Naruto didn't really know what he wanted to say. His mouth was always way ahead of his mind, though, and it had always worked out pretty well... "I'll stop working."

Yeah, and now what?

Gaara's lips twitched. "Of course you will."

Naruto growled at him. "Quit that!"

Gaara's lips curved a bit farther. He gestured to the clock on the table.

Naruto understood. "Got to go?"

Gaara nodded.

"Where are you working, now?"

Gaara shrugged. "Construction. Carrying shit."

Naruto leaned against the doorframe, and watched the redhead move towards him. Gaara's lips met his, briefly, and the foundation of Naruto's earth shook again, before sharp ivory pierced into his neck. Then Gaara was in the corridor, shrugging into his jacket – he managed to make even that look dangerous! -- and tying his boots with sharp, quick jerks.

Naruto caught his breath. Gaara's jacket was a dark brown, leather and heavy. He wore jeans, as always, and a thick black sweater.

The redhead didn't look back, or anything like that. He just left, and the door slipped shut behind him. Naruto could hear his footsteps down the steps. He listened to them and stared at a spot on the tatami floor.

He'd just agreed to stop whoring, but... there was no shock, or anything. He just felt a bit weird. Like... what now?

He should go get his stuff from Whore, because now that Gaara was gone, he felt much braver about the whole living-here thing. Right now, the apartment felt pretty comfortable. He'd always imagined being alone in here as scary, but... it actually wasn't.

This was the first time he was alone in the apartment!

He'd just officially stopped whoring!

Naruto looked around. Damn... this was all a big surprise...

Not in a bad way, though.

Naruto shrugged and started grinning again.

Or maybe just wider.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

Sorry that it took so long... I was gone over the weekend. Anyway... did you guys like it?

Big NEWS: I'll be in California next week. Between SF and Chico, with the most time in SF. We'll be on the motorcycle. If you live north of or in SF and south of Chico – we'll also be in Tahoe -- , then... drop me a line, and maybe(MAYBE!) we can meet up. That would be awesomeness, really.

It was my BIRTHDAYon Friday!

I am now SEVENTEEN!

Yay!

Anyway...

Please review...!