Disclaimers: See Chapter 1
Additional Note (Please Read): This tale is a companion with, The Conqueror & Ri: A Twist of Destiny. If you haven't read both story's chapters preceding this one, you should do so now. Thank you, my lovely readers and Beta who aid me a lot. Also, a shout out to Silvermoonlight, the bard who inspire me to continue onwards. ;-) Enjoy!
Xena & Gabrielle,
A Turn of Fate,
By, Ahkiken
Chapter 28: Beautiful Letdown
Assuaged that Gabrielle decided to indulge her, Xena wiped the residue tears from her eyes. Resisting the urge to hug her soul mate, she began explaining the cause of her choices while looking into the bard's aqua orbs.
"Long ago, I caused the death of forty thousand villagers of Higachi after killing Akemi by setting fire to the village, because they-"
"Kept you from burying Akemi's ashes." Gabrielle interrupted, becoming irate. "Spare me the retelling of that sordid story. Tell me; how are you capable of surrendering your life in Japa?"
"The spirits that died became consumed by Yodoshi. I can save them, along with the other sixty thousand he killed during his destruction of Kyushu and the neighboring villages."
Gabrielle furiously pulled the fur off her and stood up, nude, from the cot, startling Xena. Slipping on her kimono, she glared at the raven-haired woman.
"That isn't my question, Xena." Gabrielle rectified, tying the sash loosely around her waist. "I'm asking how, not why?"
"It's my duty, Gabrielle. The Greater Good demands it of me."
"Demands it of you?" The cropped blonde inquired, incredulously. "The Greater Good is demanding you leave me!"
Xena reached out to her, but Gabrielle backed away from the cot. In the short time of talking to the Warrior Princess, she started to irritate her.
"Get out."
Xena was caught off guard. "Gabrielle."
"Rise from the cot and leave my cabin." Gabrielle expressed.
"I'm not going anywhere." Xena declared, unmoving from where she was laying. "You will hear what I have to say."
In a flash, Gabrielle flopped on the cot, pushing against Xena's bare chest. "Get up and get out!"
"No." Xena replied, unruffled. "I can't."
"Why not?" Gabrielle continued to push her. "You've professed how important I am! It's not only Akemi you praise more than me, but the Greater Good, too!"
"If you believe that, you don't know me at all." Xena proclaimed. "You have no certainty of our love."
"How dare you?" Gabrielle ceased her actions, perplexed by Xena's accusation. "How dare you try to turn this on me? You were the one who lied. You have grieved me deeply."
Xena gently gripped Gabrielle's wrists. "I'm not aiming to make you feel like any of this is your fault. I chose to manipulate you. It was my decision to keep the truth hidden from you."
"Now you've spoken truly." Gabrielle yanked free from Xena's grasp. "There's no reason to listen any further."
Xena's consternation surged higher, wondering what she could say to appease her ex-lover. Gabrielle's brain appeared to be set on remaining differential to whatever Xena had to pronounce.
"Are there any words that will pacify you, Gabrielle?" She queried.
"I suppose not. Especially if all you're looking for is appeasement from me." The bard answered.
"I want you to listen to me."
"I'm trying, but you've said nothing to quell my anger towards you." Gabrielle subconsciously espied Xena's nudity, causing a tinge of lust to seep into her thoughts, which she extinguished. "If you wish to finish this topic, cover yourself, please."
Xena used the furs to blanket herself. "I just wanted to protect you from learning of my death."
"Well, your protection is lacking." Gabrielle reprimanded. "You'd devastated me instead."
"That wasn't my intention at first." Xena admitted.
"You admit you'd wanted to hurt me?" Gabrielle's rage flourished.
Xena was becoming frustrated. "You don't understand."
"No, you don't get it." Gabrielle protested. "Every time I try to push the gap close between us and settle, you always pull away. I'd desired to give you my virginity and heart, you spurn me. I wanted to live with you and Eve with the Northern Steppes Amazons. Not only did you reject the idea, but you ended our sexual intimacy also. I push, you pull. It's your nature."
"I was foolish then." Xena responded.
Seemingly ignoring her, Gabrielle went on, "This time, it was your inclination to marry me. I'm a simpleton for accepting your proposal. A tiger never changes their stripes, just like you can't alter the way you are. You're incapable of fidelity."
"That's an unfair assessment." Xena defended.
"Is it?" Gabrielle questioned. "After we became lovers, you kissed Ulysses, stating you loved him, flirted with Rafe, left me with Najara, nearly slept with Marc Antony, gave me permission to have sex with Virgil if I wanted to, and continue to entice Ares sexually, knowing he's in love with you. The announcement of Akemi made you lash out at me, as well. Your fickle attitude makes me feel like I'm unworthy of you, Xena."
"In the past, I've done shameful acts that have been interpreted like I placed others above you." Xena confessed. "However, when we were in Thebes, I meant everything I confided to you."
"Soon as you heard Akemi's name, you forsook me." Gabrielle uttered. "Perhaps it's destiny telling us we aren't supposed to be together."
Gabrielle's fatalism affected Xena. She couldn't stand for the petite woman to feel that fate deemed them to part.
"I loved you, Gabrielle. I love you still. No one compares to the love I have for you. All that I do, I do for a reason."
"And that reason is Akemi. She coaxed your view for me to change, which isn't hard when it comes to you and me. I've already mentioned how many times you're willing to show you disfavor our relationship."
"My view for you?" Letting Gabrielle's reply vex her, Xena retorted, "Similar to your view on life? I've been told Neji's death came by your hand. Am I to blame for not only your derangement to take your own life, but your transformation into an executioner also?"
"Deranged? Deranged!" Gabrielle bristled. "I am a Samurai who honors the Bushido code. Neji absolved himself of honor once he tried to murder me. It was restored with his suicide. He requested for me to aid him and I did it out of respect. I took no pleasure in beheading him."
Being set straight, Xena felt like an idiot for bringing up the subject of Gabrielle's participation in Neji's hara-kiri. Nonetheless, she noted Gabrielle didn't refute wanting to kill herself.
'Shit! I'm not going to get anywhere if I keep pissing her off. I have to control my agitation. It's my decisions that got us trailing this path.' Xena chided. "I'm sorry. I know taking his life wasn't easy for you."
She went to comfort Gabrielle, but got rebuffed. "Aren't you tired of being sorry, because I told you I'm weary of forgiving you? And yes, you have caused alterations in me, Xena. Cause of you, I won't ever trust another person to love me. It hurts too much to lose them. I went through it with Perdicus, and you are reminding me of that pain. I'll refrain from falling in love. I can't do it again."
"You are not suffering alone." Xena asserted. "I miss you tremendously. I can hardly sleep without you. The few hours I do drift off, I dream of you. Although it's pleasant, it is a nightmare, because when I wake, you're gone, making me remember I'm alone."
"You chose to be alone. You broke our bonding off, shoved me down on the floor, and removed the ring that I gave you, like it was nothing."
"I got slapped three times." Xena argued. "Those slaps were-"
"Do you recall what you did to me!" Gabrielle blared. "Would you'd prefer it was my fists?"
"I rather you stop interjecting while I'm-"
"I should punch you in the face this moment!" Gabrielle's tarrying battle-lust allowed hostilities to surface.
"You're interrupting me now!"
Gabrielle's fist was let loose and quickly got captured by Xena's hand.
"Get out!" Gabrielle shouted. "I don't want you in here any longer!"
Instantly calming her ire, Xena decided to remedy Gabrielle's. "I don't want to fight you, my love."
"I'm not your love! Leave my goddamn room, Xena!"
A second punch was thrown and the Warrior Princess intercepted it, too. The movement from restraining the ferocious bard caused the fur to slip down, disclosing her breasts to Gabrielle's sight.
"If hitting me will make you feel better, by all means." Xena released the Samurai. "Do your worse."
Gabrielle halted her attack, leering at Xena. "You and the Greater Good can go to hell!"
Tears gleamed Xena's blue eyes. She realized it was a waste of time and effort to have a conversation with Gabrielle. The disputatious blonde wouldn't relent and Xena didn't have the audacity or will to sway her anymore. Hell is where Xena believed she belonged for what she'd done to the woman she had promised to treat like her queen. Like raindrops, tears began to fall.
"You're crying for yourself, not me." Gabrielle averred. "Depart my cabin, Xena. Our discussion is over. You don't love me. You never did."
Fleeing to her lonely cabin wasn't an option as the sentence spurred Xena onward to apprise Gabrielle.
Though she couldn't cease the waterworks, Xena tremulously elucidated, "I'm not perfidious, Gabrielle. I don't intend to betray you with anyone. I... Truthfully, I was going to inform you of Akemi inside Argo's stall; how I pushed the memory of her to the far recesses of my mind after that night I failed to inter Akemi in her family's shrine. She put me in a position I had no choice to partake in. One minute she killed Yodoshi with the pinch. Next, Akemi was kneeling outside, asking me to bring her absolution for what she committed unto her father and applying the pinch to herself. I decapitated her with a heavy heart. I-"
"You'll have your chance to be with her in Japa's spirit world." Gabrielle cut Xena short. "I know you can't wait to-"
"Shut up!" Xena screamed, clamping her hand atop Gabrielle's mouth. "Grant a small favor and be quiet so you can fucking listen to me! Please!"
Seeing the desperation on Xena's countenance, Gabrielle found, despite her maddening emotions, that she easily dispelled them to hear Xena out.
"I was wrong. Not solely for my disservice of lying, but for snapping at you during our travel to Scione as well." Xena conveyed, taking her hand off Gabrielle's oral aperture. "I'm not saying this to repudiate my fabrication, I am informing you of what I wanted to tell you in the stable. I never expected to hear Akemi's name in this lifetime again. Discovering she's trapped between life and death by Yodoshi, pains me. When I entered the third tier cabin we'd shared, I planned to tell you the entirety of what Harukata and I conversed about, anent to what's to take place in Japa, but you reproof me of wanting to get a quick fuck in with you, appalling me."
"Isn't that what you wanted?" Gabrielle asked, accusingly.
"I wanted to make love to you, yes." Xena nodded. "Then I was going to recite the details of how the fire I started in Higuchi flared into an engulfing blaze, snatching the lives of forty thousand people, and that the accursed Yodoshi somehow absorbed them all. Your fussing hindered me from getting to that point. Watching you rave around, I assumed with false surety, you knew about the grisly symmetry that warrants my death. But you didn't, so I'd chosen to make you hate me, in hopes you would leave this ship and not journey to Japa. I encouraged your ratiocination of another matter entirely; that I was leaving you for Akemi."
Remembrance of what was announced that day sprung forth in Gabrielle's cognition.
'When Akemi calls, I will go to her.'
Gabrielle fought back a sob. "Why didn't you tell me what was really happening? You could've told me. You should have."
"I tried, then I had second thoughts about it. Be veridical within yourself, if I had told you I'm fated to go to Japa and die, what would you have done?" Xena queried.
The query felt more like a castigation than a question to Gabrielle, knowing full well what she would've done. Xena discerned it as well.
"You would had rushed me off this vessel, or died with me in Japa. I couldn't allow either of those choices."
'She's right, I would have talked her into abandoning this mission of sacrifice. If that didn't work, I would've followed Xena to whatever final battle awaits her in Japa to surrender my life, too.' Gabrielle cogitated. 'Xena wouldn't assent to me dying, so she possibly would had acquiesced to me, returning to Greece and relinquishing her death sentence? But what of the souls of Higuchi that Yodoshi has trapped? Would he subjugate all of Japa also, while Xena and I whiled away in Egypt?'
Gabrielle pondered on the options she unknowingly presented to Xena because of her pugnacity, understanding how she'd come to the conclusion to opt out of their marital preparation on behalf of the Greater Good; to become the savior of deceased nobodies whom impeded her task to bury Akemi, the troubling instigator of everything.
'And Xena's death is catapulting her into Akemi's arms.' The dismal thought inflamed Gabrielle, causing a droplet to escape her iris. "It's not important what I would have done after you'd told me of your impending death. That time has passed. You didn't tell me, Xena. In lieu of truth, you brought disharmony to us with lies, bestowing grief upon me. The warrior who always saved me from harm, has injured me far worse than any enemy ever had. You were my friend, protector, and lover. I was once proud to call you my Champion. I'd discarded your dark attributes when it comes to relationships, even as it repeatedly revealed a doomed prognostication, I cherished and relished calling you my future wife. You no longer share my confidence, and for that you got exactly what you wanted; my hate. Now with that knowledge, I want you to go."
With the monologue finished, Xena held herself together so she wouldn't wail in front of her soul mate. 'It can't end like this.'
Gabrielle saw the sadness enveloping Xena, and couldn't help herself from thinking about their lives together. It was all over; their sparring, the fun-loving times they had, the sagacious banter of wills they'd engaged in, and their playfulness. Her ruminations mustered on, plaguing her with what their nightly rituals engendered; lying on the conjoined bedrolls and staring at the darken sky, counting the coruscation of stars that filled it. The enjoyment of lovemaking in the moonlight till exhaustion claimed them, forcing slumber in one another's embrace. Even the petty arguments had a lingering appeal to Gabrielle, giving her pause for the finality of their relationship.
'What relationship? Xena ended it with me almost a moon ago. Xena was my hangup, coercing me to heartache and suicide. However, it's done and I have closure. I can move forward.' She coached. 'I had enough of the ups and downs induced by Xena. I can get on without her... Can't I?'
Tanya's inquiry on the last day they practiced recurred to Gabrielle.
'True, I guess. Me and my father had lots of ups, including lows. However, even if madness occurs more, isn't the joy worth it all?'
Xena finally conceded to Gabrielle's wishes. Gazing at the beautiful bard, up close, one last time, she neglected a declaration of eternal love and began rising from the cot, until Gabrielle clutched her forearm. Watery sapphire orbs connected with greenish blue.
"By God's grace, I don't know why." Gabrielle cried. "But you have a hold on me. I love you much more than my hate."
Xena lost the battle to rein in her cries also, as her larger body fell on top of Gabrielle's smaller frame, hugging her tightly. "I'm such a moron."
"We both are." Gabrielle wept. "I shouldn't have been jealous and envious. I let it guide me, causing disarray, too."
"Let's not concentrate on that." Xena insisted, feeling her soul rejoice as she kissed the crown of Gabrielle's head and cheeks. "We found each other. I can make this better. We'll be fine."
"Eli was right." Gabrielle smiled through tears. "He knew I would forgive you, though I'm still angry."
"What?" Xena was baffled, slowing down on the raining kisses.
"Oh, I'm still mad at you. Profoundly in fact." Gabrielle became adamant.
"You can stay mad at me for the remainder of our days." Xena agreed. "But what does Eli have to do with this?"
Knowing it was her turn to inform her of certain events that transpired, Gabrielle looked at Xena.
Feeling the darkness of dread, mixed with tepid relief, she affirmed, "Xena, I've got to tell you what is happening."
{X&G}
Tanya walked inside the armory, observing the single individual in the spacious room, training with his katana. She recognized the blue armored Samurai from not only the afternoon of her duel with Ekko, as he stood next to Gabrielle on the top deck, but as one of the armored Samurai that accompanied Kenji on their search for the Warrior Princess.
Ending her observation of the dark-haired, handsome man, Tanya announced her presence, "Hello."
Zicalus' quickened swings came to a halt. "Good evening, Tanya Kun."
"You remember my name." Tanya gushed, trekking towards him.
"Yes. You'd aided us in finding Xena Sama and you're a friend of Gabrielle San's." He sheathed his katana. "Have you seen her?"
Entranced by Zicalus' light green irises, Tanya hadn't heard the question. "Huh?"
"Have you seen Gabrielle San?"
"Oh, no. No, I haven't."
"Hmm." Zicalus sounded disheartened, equipping his naginata off his back. "Thank you."
Commencing his drills, Tanya chastised herself for acting like a bashful village girl. 'He's cute, so what! Get yourself together! You are a disciple of Xena's now, on your way to becoming her prized pupil. Act like it!'
Gaining composure, Tanya unsheathed her sword, starting her own workout, thrusting and slashing the air in different stances. A half hour later, the auburn-haired teen became bored with her tedious session and decided to watch Zicalus do his. She admired his skill and the performance he displayed with his staff-like weapon.
"You are amazing."
The compliment surprised Zicalus, ceasing his practice again. "Uh, thanks."
Realizing her gushing was renewed, Tanya reaffirmed, "I mean, the way you can utilize your sword and that staff in a proficient fashion is amazing."
"This isn't a stave, Tanya Kun." Zicalus corrected. "It's called a naginata."
"What's the difference?" Tanya moved closer to investigate. "Other than it being metal instead of wood, it is crafted to appear as a staff."
"Appearances can be deceiving." Zicalus grinned, twisting the metallic pole slightly to extend its blade that protruded from the top portion of it.
"Wow." Tanya was astounded. "A staff that can turn into a spear."
Zicalus laughed, retracting the blade. "That's one way of putting it."
"Can you teach me how to use it?" She asked.
"Sure." Zicalus concurred.
"Right now?"
"If you want to."
"I would really like that. Besides, Gabrielle says it's good to learn how to use more than one weapon." Tanya avouched.
Zicalus picked up another naginata from the shelf, handing it to her. "Gabrielle San told you that?"
"Yes. She taught me a lot." Tanya said proudly.
"She trains you?"
Taking the pole, Tanya's features became gloomy. "Not anymore. She's going through some things. I tried helping, only to make matters complex for her."
Curiosity nearly caused him to pry, but Zicalus dismissed the idea. He didn't want to upset Tanya further.
"It'll all pave out well. Gabrielle San has a tendency for forgiveness, even for people who are considered her enemies."
The reference to Neji wasn't lost on Tanya. Her friendship with Suzu was quite informative, learning of Gabrielle's part in Neji's death and how she sliced his head off without carrying animosity for the man who plotted to kill her.
A smile formed on Tanya's lips. "I agree, Gabrielle is very forgiving. Thank you, um. I don't know your name."
"Zicalus."
"Zicalus." Tanya repeated. "Thank you, Zicalus Sama."
He blushed. "Just Zicalus."
"Okay, Zicalus." Tanya chuckled. "I'm ready when you are."
Zicalus was happy for the distraction Tanya gave him. Although he wondered where Gabrielle was and what could be keeping her from honoring the promise she made to train with him, the elite Samurai would teach Tanya moves with the naginata before going to Gabrielle's cabin.
"Alright." He wielded the weapon in a defensive pose. "We will begin with the basics."
{X&G}
Xena grabbed Gabrielle's index finger, trying to remove the silver ring. "It can't be stuck."
"Xena." Gabrielle pulled her hand away. "Didn't you hear what I said? The ring can't come off, because of-"
"The Omphalos shard." Xena interjected.
"Now I have to endure your interruptions?" Gabrielle lightly teased.
"No, I apologize." She offered. "I can't believe you went through all that in the duration of our separation. Eli showing up, confirming my death, warning you of an unknown goddess' intent on controlling a powerful stone by destroying the temples in Japa, and bringing the nine Muses to bless you with that dragon tattoo for protection. Did I miss anything?"
Gabrielle leaned sideways on her elbow, gazing at Xena. "Your usual fastidiousness only amazes me when you forget major details. Do you recall me saying the shard is dangerous and I might get transported to the other world I've envisioned."
"I haven't forgotten." Xena caressed Gabrielle's shoulder. "I simply don't believe it."
"Then you ought to." Gabrielle admonished. "The Omphalos shard on this band won't come off my finger. When it glows, I dream of an older version of you. She doesn't have your name, but goes by the Conqueror, and her world is real. My double is named Ri and she wears a shard on her person, too. Eli stated, whoever is powering the shards, probably wants me and Ri to switch places."
Xena gave Gabrielle's explanation her sapient attention. Evidently Eli told Gabrielle the names of the two women whom were their replicas, or the vision exposed it. Xena berated herself for not discussing the dream Gabrielle had when they were in Argo's stall, and summing the glowing jade gem as nothing more than Gabrielle's imagination.
"Was it Eli, or your dreams, that help you ascertain what you know about this Conqueror and Ri?"
"Eli told me the Omphalos shard could teleport me to another world, but he didn't have a clue what that world consisted of besides our duplicates. My first presage gave me a glimpse of a muted battle between legions of Romans against the Conqueror, her army, and Glaphyra. The Conqueror's army prevailed before Brutus and an unfamiliar man appeared. I couldn't hear anything throughout that one, but the second vision was more profound." Gabrielle explained.
"What do you mean?"
"I didn't only hear, I could also feel, smell, and see from my own eyes while I sat in the Conqueror's dungeon."
"You were locked inside a cell?" Xena inquired.
Gabrielle closed her orbs, reminiscing. "The Conqueror came to me, that's how I learned her name and Ri's. She surmised I was a spy or assassin, and I'd murdered Ri to masquerade as her. I was scheduled for trial, I'm guessing a mock one, then execution by hanging or decapitation."
"Was that all she said?"
"No." Gabrielle trembled, opening her eyes. "She asserted you were dead."
The predicament of Japa that solicited Xena's death, filled the cabin with a galore of ominous foretelling. Xena scooted over to collect the worrying Samurai in her arms, but the petite warrior became tensed. Not wanting to break the fragile reconciliation they gained, Xena waited for Gabrielle to make the next move, which didn't take long as the cropped blonde threw herself into Xena's embrace.
"I'm scared, Xena." She laid in her favorite spot on her soul mate's shoulder. "What if you die and I get switched with Ri? What if the switching happens before you die?"
"Shh." Xena rubbed Gabrielle's hair, soothing her. "That's not going to happen, I won't let it."
"You can't prevent it." Gabrielle replied. "I think the Korei-den temple is destroyed. I'm not positive, but the shard is growing powerful. Soon I'll be teleported to the Conqueror's world."
"You don't know that." Xena professed. "The Daimyo is warding Yodoshi off. The temple is still standing."
"Five thousand men against forty thousand... Scratch that, one hundred thousand." Gabrielle declared. "There's no way Morimoto survived. If the temple isn't destroyed now, it will be."
"Gabrielle, you have to focus on staying confident he'll-"
"What?" Gabrielle questioned, lifting off Xena. "We are a far distance from Japa and it's impossible for us to get to Higuchi in time. You have to die so others won't suffer from Yodoshi's wrath like Morimoto and his men. You are going to die. Nothing I say or do will deter that."
Reaching for the disgruntled woman got Xena shoved for the endeavor. "What would you have me do?"
"You know what I want."
"I can't do that, Gabrielle."
"Yes you can. You don't have to play hero for these people."
"I thought I was a hero. You've always told me so." Xena tried jesting to alleviate the growing tension.
"I don't find any humor in this and forgive me for shoving you, but I don't need your efficacious tenderness to subdue me from how I'm feeling." Gabrielle arose from the cot, walking to the table where Xena's ring resided. "I want you to imagine something for me. Can you do that?"
The Warrior Princess glanced at Gabrielle picking an item up by the basin of water. She was cautious if it was a tool to be used to harm either one of them.
Casting the concerned cogitation out her mind, she acceded, "Yes, I can do that."
"Imagine Perdicus returned to life." Gabrielle kept her back to Xena, twirling the golden circlet in her fingers. "He needs me to sustain him and revive others that Callisto killed. The only way I can go about aiding them from dying again is by being with him. What would you have me do, Xena? The Greater Good dictates I should do it, because innocent people are involved. If the Greater Good have its way, it will rip me from you. Would you concede to that?"
Xena didn't have to contemplate her reply. "No."
Gabrielle was equally annoyed and grateful for Xena choosing not to let her go. A brief smile lit her face until dejection settled in, diminishing it.
"So, you have to understand how I feel. It's selfishness, I know, but you would be selfish as well. We will never have a love like this. Ever." Clenching the ring in her hand, Gabrielle spun to stand in front of Xena. "You once told me our love is an end in itself. I had a hard time accepting that because you were a demon when you spoke such admiration. Being a hellspawn, you remained devoted to me. I was thoroughly tempted to becoming a fallen angel, but I'd fought you instead. I couldn't take seeing you corrupted. Thinking back on it, I would've joined you in Hell."
Wrapping the fur snuggly to her body, Xena seized Gabrielle's forearms. "I'm glad you stood against me, not willingly allowing me to damn your soul."
"You don't get it." Gabrielle responded. "God damn the whole world if I can't have you, Xena. And you want me to let you go for thousands of souls?"
Again, Xena was rendered speechless and couldn't find words to say, just like the first time Gabrielle avowed the statement that signified a strong attachment to her. One thought came to her while staring at the bard; the words of Harukata.
"Gabrielle, I can come back."
"What?" She instinctively stepped close to Xena.
"Harukata apprised me that he would talk to Amaterasu, and if the sun Kami wills it, I can be resurrected as long as he stays alive during this war with Yodoshi."
The glare and frown Gabrielle gave Xena was unexpected. So was her violent reaction when she began trying to free herself from Xena to actuate bashing her.
"You knew and still chose to lie to me!"
"No, Gabrielle." Xena firmly restrained the truculent Samurai. "I just found out. Harukata imparted it to me on the deck yesterday."
"Were you going to tell me?" Gabrielle ceased her exertion. "Who am I kidding, you weren't ever going to tell me."
"I was." Xena said honestly.
"Yeah, right." Gabrielle's expression was sarcastic as she tried escaping Xena's grip.
"I didn't want to give any hopes up." Xena pulled her nearer, becoming sincere. "I was waiting for Harukata's confirmation from his goddess before saying anything."
"Your resurrection isn't definite?" Gabrielle asked.
Xena shook her head. "But it's a possibility."
"You can come back." Gabrielle felt the humongous weight of depression recede from her spirit.
"Yes." Xena answered concisely.
"Throughout our conversation, why didn't you lead with that?" Gabrielle sighed. "You can be infuriating sometimes."
Feeling Gabrielle's inimical mood shift to meager contentment, Xena guided her onto the cot. After Gabrielle sat down next to her, the Warrior Princess let her forearms go. Wanting to touch Xena's face, the Amazon un-clenched her hands, causing the gold ring to slip from her loosened grasp and Xena's reflexes caught it before it fell on the floorboards.
Xena analyzed the tiny object in her palm. "My ring."
"It almost got lost a couple of times." Gabrielle verbalized. "Still, I'm planning on keeping it... Unless you want it back."
"I do. I shouldn't have taken it off to begin with."
"You're damn right, you shouldn't have." Gabrielle reproved. "Don't make me regret returning it to you, Xena."
"I swear, I won't." Xena gleefully slid the ring on her left index digit, reading the engravings, "My Soul, My Life. Thank you, Gabrielle."
"It's yours. It was always yours." She implicated more than just the band.
Xena beamed as she understood what was implied; Gabrielle's life and soul remained hers.
Next, she noticed Gabrielle stifling a yawn. "Lay down with me."
Not wanting to be difficult, Gabrielle consented, "Okay."
Xena started to unwrap the fur from her body, but was stopped from doing so.
"What are you doing?" Gabrielle queried.
"I'm going to cover you with the fur and put my leathers on. Then we can sleep."
Gabrielle started picturing Xena's nakedness, triggering arousal. It's been a long while since she made love to her soul mate.
'I'm not yielding to my sexual impulses.' Gabrielle mused. 'We haven't solved all our problems yet, and sex only complicates things. God, she's right here next to me. It would be so easy to... No, it's just the battle-lust from earlier talking. I won't let myself down by giving in.'
Gabrielle didn't want to risk the chance of viewing Xena naked, knowing once the blue-eyed beauty commenced removing the fur, it would allure her into doing something she really wanted, but didn't need.
"You can keep the fur, Xena. I'll be fine."
"Are you sure?"
"Mmm-hmm." Gabrielle hummed, lying on the cot with Xena resting behind her.
Xena, hesitantly, enclosed her arm around Gabrielle, bringing them closer together.
"Don't get any lewd ideas, Xena. We're going to sleep, nothing more."
"I'm not." Xena knew her brevity wouldn't appease Gabrielle's skepticism. "I miss this; sleeping beside you. We don't need to make love to cement that we've made up. We still have more to discuss anyway."
"Exactly." Gabrielle was eager to concur. "We do have a lot to talk about. First; your breach in communication. Second; leaving me oblivious, so you could muddle in secrets. And third; your tendentiousness to think telling lies, even justified ones, will work on me. I did caution you, but you didn't listen."
Xena laughed softly at the reminiscence of their time spent at an inn after battling Najara a second time. "I see you were correct. I should've heeded your admonition."
"Yup." Gabrielle cheered. "Be wise to do so from now on."
Silence conquered the room, and though the two women were tired from the toll of their day, they both felt incomplete. As if some words were left unsaid.
"I love you, Gabrielle."
"I love you, Xena."
Their amorous affirmation was declared in unison, causing the hearts that belonged to them to swell with jubilation.
Turning in her lover's arms, Gabrielle locked eyes with Xena's azure irises. "Say it again."
"I love you."
Gabrielle's nervousness didn't constrain her from pressing her lips to Xena's.
"Once more."
"I love you." Xena echoed.
Another momentary kiss followed.
"Tell me one more time, Xena."
"I love you, Gabrielle."
Lips met again in a deep osculation, however, it wasn't transient like the others. Tentatively, Gabrielle languidly climbed on top of Xena, their mouths ajar to caress each other's tongue. The bard wasn't certain if Xena went through all of this in an elaborate plan to bed her and, at the moment, she didn't care. Her body and soul was craving to be satisfied sexually, disregarding the loathing notion she was letting herself down for choosing to make love to Xena.
While elegant, elongated fingers swiftly untied the sash to open her kimono, Gabrielle sensuously ruminated, 'What a beautiful letdown.'
To Be Continued...
