Merle seemed as calm as could possibly be considering the situation he was in. His chest raised and lowered at a normal pace. I wish I could have been that calm. I reached out to touch him, only to be bumped on the top of the head by Peter's gun. I looked up at him; his eyes were fixated on the gun's sight. At the other end, his and Merle's eyes met. Peter was sweating profusely, while Merle looked as if this was routine. He studied Peter like he was at the store picking out a new wardrobe. After he broke eye contact with Peter, he looked back down at me. I knew he could tell I was scared senseless, but the way he was looking at me told me to get my head together and save him. I had to. I got him into this, and I'd be the one to get him out. I stared down at the ground and took a deep breath before speaking with Peter.

"Peter, if he has to die, at least let me put him down," I cried. "You can even hold on to the gun with me."

Peter lowered the rifle and looked from Merle and back to me.

"Alright, but if you do anything shifty, I'll shoot you first."

I nodded and wiped the tears from my eyes. Peter put his hand under my arm and roughly pulled me up from the ground. His finger remained on the trigger as he positioned himself around me. Once we were comfortable, I looked through the sight of the gun and at Merle. I kept the tears coming.

As I told Merle, "I love you," I switched the safety on the gun. I flipped the gun over my shoulder and hit Peter on the head with it. Merle got up from the ground and launched himself at Peter. While they were on the ground fighting, I jumped in an attempt to retrieve the gun. Peter kicked Merle in the face, pushing him backwards. As he recovered, Peter and I fought over control of the barrel of the gun. I felt him flick the safety switch off; he aimed it at my head. We fought over control of the trigger. Just as he was about to blow my brains out, I kicked the gun up and it fired into the air. I heard Merle cry out in pain behind me.

"Fuck you, Peter!" I yelled.

I brought my knee up into his crotch to gain control of the gun. While he was on the ground, I cocked it and aimed it at his body. Just as Peter started to stand and take the gun, I pulled the trigger. Pieces of Peter flew in every direction, splattering onto the trees and staining those pretty yellow flowers with his blood. The hummingbirds were no longer buzzing above our heads. The blast of the shotgun echoed in my ears. After it subsided, there was complete silence until Merle started to whimper.

I turned to face him. He was holding his arm and his face was pushed into the dirt. I dropped the shotgun on the ground and went to kneel by his side.

"Move your hand," I said.

He took his hand off of the bullet wound in his arm and let me look at it. I looked over at Peter's body to see if I could use his clothing as a wrap, but they were caked in blood. I pulled my t-shirt over my head and started to rip it up.

"Can you stand?"

"Shot my arm, not my legs."

I ignored his snide remark.

"Good, go to the water."

He moved himself near the water. I went to sit beside him, and I did my best to clean the blood and dirt off of his arm with the water from the falls. Afterwards, I tied a long strip of my shirt around it.

"That should be okay until we get back to camp."

He looked up at me. He was panting and covered in sweat.

"Merle…I'm sorry."

He looked over at Peter's blown apart torso.

"You did what you had to do to make sure we lived. Don't be sorry."

"But your arm."

"I'd rather be shot in the arm than dead. C'mon, we gotta get out of here. No doubt the geeks heard that."

"Right."

I helped him up from the ground, and we walked back to the motorcycle. On the way, I picked up the shotgun. I stood by next to the bike and waited for Merle to mount so we could leave. He started to take off his leather vest.

"Here, put this on."

I quickly threw it over my shoulders to cover up my bra. He threw his leg over the seat and started it up. Sure enough, just as the engine began to roar, the walkers started to emerge from out of the woods. I quickly hopped on the back of the bike and wrapped one arm around Merle. I kept my other arm free just in case I needed to shoot. The walkers were slow enough that it allowed us to turn around and get away.

The entire trip back, I stared at Merle's injury and watched as the blood trickled down slowly from the gaping wound in his arm. I rested my head against his back and watched the blur of the trees fly by. I almost wanted to fall asleep, but it could wait until we got back to camp.

We finally came up on the road to camp and started down the road. When we passed the lake front, I noticed Daryl standing on top of the RV with binoculars pointed down at us. He must have seen Merle's arm, because he nearly jumped off the top of the motor home to get to us. He stood next to the bike when we stopped next to the truck.

"What the hell happened?" He lifted his crossbow and pointed it at me. "Did she shoot you brother?"

"Put the goddamn bow down, Daryl. I didn't shoot him. Peter did."

"Peter? That asshole that locked you up in his basement?"

"Yeah."

"Let's go get him."

"Too late, Daryl. 'S done," Merle said.

I pulled at Merle's wife beater.

"C'mon love. We have to get the lead out of your arm. Daryl, I'm going to need your help."

We got Merle up from the bike and sat him down on the back of the truck.

"I'll get in there and get it all out," I said to Daryl. "If he starts moving around, you have to help keep him still."

Daryl jumped up in the truck behind his brother. I pushed myself up next to Merle and un-wrapped my stained shirt from his shoulder after retrieving the first aid kit. I dabbed up the excess blood around the open wounds with some alcohol. I would have thought the pressure I applied to his arm would have at least made him wince, but he didn't budge or cry out. Next, I picked the tweezers and scalpel up out of the box.

"Hold still Merle."

I pulled his arm out and rested it on my lap. He rubbed my leg as he waited for me to cut into him. I breathed in deep before cutting the bullet wounds open more. He still made no movement, or show any sign of pain whatsoever. I looked up at his face; he looked down at his arm and waited for me to continue. I picked up the tweezers and pushed them inside. The lead clinked against the tweezers; I positioned them so I could pick the metal out of his arm. I dropped the piece of lead on the ground and went back in for more. Once I got all of the pieces out, I cleaned up his injury one last time before wrapping it up again.

"There," I said.

Merle slid himself off of the tailgate. Daryl had left at least twenty minutes before that; he knew I wasn't going to need him any longer.

"Good job, baby girl."

"Thanks…not bad for a first try."

His eyes widened and his head shot in my direction.

"You ain't never done that before?!"

"Nope. Learned from watching autopsies," I said as I smiled up at him.

He shook his head and pushed the tailgate back up into place.

"How were you able to stay still for all of that?" I asked.

"Well, I joined the army after I moved out of my dad's place. I've been in juvi a whole mess of times. I'm used to pain. You learn to shrug it off, or ya go down."

"Oh."

"Think you should go put a shirt on?"

I looked down at my bare stomach and sighed before walking over to the tent. I stopped at the opening and turned back towards Merle.

"Merle? Why don't you come in here? I have something I need to ask you."

I unzipped the tent and stepped in; leaving it open for him. As I pulled a fresh shirt over my head, he came inside and sat down on the chair across the room.

"I thought you said that Peter was dead?"

"I thought she only had one son. I saw the one dead in the basement; then did the mother in. I didn't know I made a mistake till you mentioned something about it."

"I see."

"Sorry baby. I didn't know that psycho was gonna come for us."

"It's alright. He's really not coming back this time."

"Can't believe you shot the son 'bitch. I thought you'd at least let me beat the shit out of him."

I sat down on top of the bed and put my hands in my face.

"I can't believe I did it either. That's not me. Both of that woman's sons are dead because of me."

"You chose life. No shame n' that."

"If I hadn't run off, they'd be alive, and you wouldn't have been shot."

"Forget about it."

"But..."

"Leave it alone!"

I stopped and did what Merle asked. He approached me and sat down on the bed next to me. I leaned over and rested my head on the shoulder that hadn't been shot up.

"I thought about what you said. I'm gonna dump my stash."

I looked up at him.

"Really?"

"You're more important than blow."

I put my hands on either side of his face and kissed him.

"Thank you."


The fire burned low that evening; Shane didn't want anything too large. He said there was too much activity in the area as of late. Merle started to argue with him, but then gave up when he realized it wasn't making Shane mad.

The brothers opened up a case of beer that they'd taken from the gas station. I'd never joined them for a drink before, but tonight I was in the mood for it. Merle popped one of the tops off with his bare hand. I had tried this many times before, but I could never manage. I'd always ended up cutting my palms.

Every once in a while, I would ask him how his arm felt and if he needed anything. He would always assure me that he was fine, and tell me to hand him another beer.

When the camp was completely dark, we heard some commotion coming from the other side. I lifted my head up to look.

"Not your problem," Merle said.

Since he was drinking, I took extra care in listening to what he had to say. Daryl kept his face towards the fire. I knew he was curious about what was going on too, but he didn't dare look.

After another hour, and the last few bottles remaining, I noticed Daryl get up from his seat and walk over to the side of his truck.

"What are you doin' over here?"

I stood up and started to walk over to see who he was talking to, only to be greeted by Sophia who had run out from behind the truck. She wrapped her arms around my face and wept.

"Oh, Sophie, he wasn't trying to be mean."

I ran my fingers through her hair and sat back down around the fire with her. She sat down next to me and leeched onto me. I looked up at Merle who was glaring downwards; I shrugged my shoulders at him. I was very confused. My shirt was starting to get wet from where her face rested.

"Um, Sophia. Did Daryl really upset you that much?"

She looked up at me with her leaky eyes.

"It wasn't him," she cried.

"Then what is it?" I asked.

She dug her fingers into Merle's leather jacket; tightening it around my shoulders. She shook her head, but wouldn't tell me. I put my hands around her small shoulders and held her back so I could get a better look at her. I noticed that she winced when I had held her shoulders. I took my hand away and pulled up her sleeve. There was a dark blue bruise there. My mouth fell open and I looked back up at Merle. He didn't want to care, but I could tell it didn't sit right with him either.

I pulled the child back towards me and held her until she fell asleep. The brothers and I didn't say a word to each other. The awkward silence was broken when someone else approached our fire. Merle looked up before I noticed they were there. I turned and looked to see Carol gingerly approaching.

"Sorry. I didn't know she'd come over here," she said.

"It's okay."

I picked up Sophia and handed her over to Carol. She almost dropped her. I could tell she'd been hurt too.

"Well, goodnight," said Carol.

Without another word, she turned and walked back to her tent with her daughter cradled in her arms. I stood and watched until she was out of sight, then turned back to the fire. I know what Merle said about getting attached, but that was horrible. It was worse than seeing half of the population being wiped out. I looked up at the brothers. Daryl kept his head down, while Merle wouldn't take his eyes off of me.

"What was I supposed to do? Push her off?"

"Could have. But someone should be over there kickin' Ed's ass."

He stood up and started walking towards their side of the camp. I ran around and got in front of him.

"It can wait till morning, can't it? Sophia and Carol are already upset."

He gulped down the rest of his beer and threw it on the ground.

"I'm going to bed. You gonna come with?"

"Yeah. I'm getting tired."

He put his arm around my waist and we went to the tent to retire for the night.


I heard Merle get up at an ungodly hour of the morning. I thought about getting up with him, but I was too comfy and warm in bed. A few hours later, he came back in and shuffled around a bit. I pulled the covers over my head and waited for him to be done. When the noise subsided, I fell back asleep for a while longer. When the sun started to irritate my eyes, I finally rubbed them and rolled out of bed.

When I got outside, I noticed Daryl sitting around the fire alone.

"Where's Merle?" I asked.

"Decided that he was gonna go into Atlanta with Glenn and a couple other people."