Aethyta sat at her desk, looking at a photo of Liara. She missed her but she considered herself lucky that at least she had been able to meet her daughter before everything went to hell. She had been able to do something for her. It didn't make up for all the years of absence but it was something. If you are still alive somewhere, Little Wing, I wish you a long and happy life! She knew that the chances of ever seeing her daughter again were slim and none. But there had been so much death, so much loss that all Aethyta could do was whatever small part she could to help rebuild whatever could be rebuilt. She was glad that she had stayed on Thessia after the fall, to make her last stand and fight to the death, because she had been there when it ended to help pick up the pieces.
She turned on her monitor to see if there had been any new developments and saw the headline: Galactic Savior goes renegade! Shepard, must be. Aethyta read further. "Sources are reporting that galactic hero Commander Shepard has attacked an unarmed piano player on the Citadel. Bystanders are saying that it was an unprovoked attack. 'He was just sitting there playing on his piano and Shepard just went all crazy on him. Just went over there and wham! sent him flying', said a salarian on the scene. As of yet, there is no comment from the Interim Council or the Alliance military. Could it be that our hero is indoctrinated? Uh oh, we better hope not!" There is nothing that scared and hopeless people like better to forget their own problems than a celebrity and who was a bigger celebrity than Shepard?Every day, a new article came out and the rumors swirled. Build up a hero and tear them down piece by piece just to make yourself feel better.
Aethyta 's curiosity got the better of her and she turned to the extranet. She knew Shepard but really had no idea about her history beyond her military exploits. Born on Earth. An orphan. She's alone. I know what that's like. 33 years old. She's just a Goddess-damned kid! Asari children were not even considered adults by that age. She's a human but still so young. Way too young to have the weight of the galaxy on her shoulders. What did I know when I was only 33? Jack and Shit! Aethyta knew that Liara had loved Shepard and that Shepard had been her bondmate even though they never made it official. And she believed that Shepard had loved Liara too. Aethyta thought that there just might be something else that she could do for her daughter.
Shepard was on her fourth drink when the door buzzer sounded. Shepard rubbed her forehead. What do they want now? Shepard considered not answering but instead reluctantly got up and answered the door. Might as well get it over with, whoever it is. She was surprised when she saw an asari matriarch standing in her doorway.
" Aethyta! What are you doing on the Citadel? I heard that you had survived the war but I thought you'd stay on Thessia. Can I get you a drink?"
"Sure. Oh, I'm just here to do this and that. I figured I'd come see the Savior of the Galaxy while I was here."
Shepard snorted. Shepard handed her a drink and they both sat on the couch. "I hear you played some part in getting your relay back up. How's it all coming?"
"Yeah, as it turns out, not all the matriarchs ignored me when I told them that we needed to get our heads out of our asses and start making our own relays. A secret, well-funded group had been working on it for years behind the Council's back."
"And good thing too. I'm not sure we would have been able to save the Citadel without it. That technology really helped with the repairs. Not to mention having the asari ride to the rescue mere weeks after the Battle for Earth."
"I hear that the Great Commander Shepard had to get the people around here to get off their asses after the reapers went down. That you were instrumental in saving the Citadel. As if saving the galaxy wasn't enough. Nice place you have here."
"It's a shithole but I don't need much. With so many people homeless, we have to be careful with every space."
"I've also started to hear that the cracks are starting to show in our Savior. Maybe drinking a little too much." Aethyta looked at the nearly empty bottle on the table. "Getting into fights, bullying people, just being very unsavior-like."
"Still the diplomat, I see. Is there a point coming or are you just here to give me a hard time?"
Aethyta paused for a moment before continuing. "You have to let her go. You need to move on. She isn't coming back and you have to face that. You have to get on with your life."
A flash of anger on Shepard's face. Who is she to presume she knows how I feel? "You don't know that! And how am I supposed to get on with my life when every day, people are still looking to me? Every person that I meet wants something from me. Every goddamned person I pass in the hall looks at me for hope. Get your fucking hope somewhere else! Leave me the fuck alone for once."
"You want my advice? Get in a ship and go to some backwater planet somewhere where nobody knows who you are and do what you want for a change."
But Liara would come back here if she comes back at all. Shepard considered for a moment and then looked down at her shoes, too embarrassed to meet Aethyta's eyes when asking her next question.
"With the asari meld, is there any kind of psychic connection that happens? That stays even after the meld ends?"
"Of course. I still feel Nezzi with me sometimes even though it's been decades since we were together." Aethyta considered what Shepard might really be asking. "It doesn't mean that Liara's still alive."
"But I can still feel her in my mind. It's so vivid. Like she is right there and I can almost reach out and touch her."
"You have to get over her. It's been over a year and not one word. Not a rumor even. Your ship probably blew up in the battle or in the shockwave like thousands of others and her with it. Even if she is alive somewhere, she could be on the other side of the galaxy where they won't have a working relay for years or ever." Aethyta lowered her voice and continued. "The meld can be a powerful thing. Addicting even. I suggest that you find some pretty, young asari girl and have her fuck your brains out. You'd have your pick. It isn't always about love. Hell, most of the time, it's not about love. It might help you. Make you feel alive again."
Shepard angrily got off the couch. "I don't want that!" The thought of someone besides Liara in her mind...it would make it so much worse.
"Well then, what do you want?"
Shepard couldn't answer that. She knew, but what she wanted, she couldn't have. She's genuinely trying to help you. Shepard understood that but it was too painful to continue. Shepard sat back down and changed the subject.
"How is Thessia? I mean, how is it really?"
"It's still pretty rough. Whole cities, just nothing but rubble. We are still finding decomposed bodies everywhere. Places where the ground still looks like it's been painted violet. I've seen death and war before but it was nothing compared to this. But, it's getting better every day. All any of us can do is focus on the future."
If I had been quicker. If I had not made so many mistakes. If I had been more prepared. If I had pushed harder. Millions more would still be alive. "I'm so sorry Aytheta", Shepard said softly, looking away.
Aethyta locked her eyes to Shepard's and reached out to take her hand. "Let me tell you something. We were a heartbeat away from extinction. Everyone and everything that we ever were. Completely wiped out. You saved the asari! You saved everyone! I'm grateful to you and I will never forget that! Everyone should be on their knees thanking you. If you want to hit someone in the face, they should be grateful that they still have a face to hit. They should be lined up around the corner to let you hit them in the face."
Shepard took her hand away and turned her head so that Aethyta wouldn't see the tears in her eyes. Not true. I killed so many. I let so many die. All the people I sacrificed! Shepard closed her eyes to try to regain control of her emotions. Shepard considered her guest. Does she even know what a hero Liara was? Why did I just think 'was'?
"It's not true but thank you for saying it anyway. You do know who the real hero is, right? Do you know that it was Liara who found the plans for the Crucible? Without Liara, the Reapers would have won." Didn't they win anyway? It was hard to see any kind of victory in what happened. Survival maybe but victory?
Now it was Aethyta 's turn to get tears in her eyes. My daughter. "I always knew she was special."
"She saved my life more times than I can count", Shepard said.
"Say. Let me buy you dinner. I hear some of the restaurants have opened up again."
"I don't think that's such a good idea." Shepard held up her glass. "I think I've already had a few too many. I wouldn't want to start another incident."
"Don't worry, kid. I'll take care of you. No one's gonna mess with you with me around."
Shepard snorted. "Just promise me you won't hurt anyone. If I am seen with an asari matriarch and bodies start getting splattered, it's gonna make the news."
"I'll try to restrain myself."
Shepard grinned a little, "You're not coming on to me or anything, are you? Cuz that would be weird."
"Hah! If I came on to you, you'd know it. And believe me when I tell you that you couldn't handle a matriarch. Your brains would explode!"
Shepard chuckled lightly despite herself.
"Hah! Made you laugh!"
