AN: So this isn't as soon as I hoped, but at least I only made you wait a day for this one.
IMPORTANT: This episode has a deleted scene in it, and I really, really like it. So I'm using it here at the beginning. If you don't know what I'm talking about, you can watch the scene here: watch?v=XWIBjqQ7jEo. I'm really sorry if this is annoying for you guys, and I probably won't ever do it again, but I love how the deleted scene sets up the idea that Castle was trying to comfort Beckett. And any scene between Beckett and Alexis is awesome to me (I really love how they interact with each other.).
So here it is, Beckett at the Castle loft, I hope you like it.
Please review!
How exactly had she gotten herself into this situation? It was one thing to have her apartment blown up, and even to get kicked off the case. Those were both outcomes of her job; she could handle that. But how was it that she was in Castle's loft, without him, drinking hot chocolate with his daughter? Never in a million years would she have fathomed that possible.
Kate was getting the impression that very little could be awkward in the presence of Little Castle. However, if Big Castle didn't come back soon, she was likely to explode.
"You know, I think this is the best hot chocolate I've ever had." Ah, small talk. At least it was better than asking her about school, or something equally inane.
"My secret's double chocolate, double marshmallow." She definitely got that from Castle. "I make it for Dad when he's had a particularly tough day."
It was weird for Kate to hear Castle referred to as "Dad." It wasn't like he didn't talk about his little girl all the time, but she so rarely saw them together. It was a side of him that she still wasn't used to. Alexis's admission did make her make her curious though.
"What about when you've had a bad day."
"He makes me pancakes." Alexis smiled as she said it, then took a sip of her hot chocolate, blissfully unaware that this actually meant something to Kate. To her it was not big deal, but Kate's breath caught in her throat.
That morning she'd half expected Castle to either still be passed out on her couch, or gone altogether. Instead he was making her pancakes. She chalked it up to his sweet tooth and her lack of food. Apparently she'd been wrong.
Not only had he come over to "protect" her (fat chance of her letting that happen), but his first instinct was to do the one thing he thought might be comforting to her.
She didn't really want to think about what that meant, and luckily she didn't have to because Castle chose that moment to walk in the front door. Kate watched her partner interact with his daughter, displaying a tenderness of which she didn't see much. For a second it made her wish she was sixteen again, when she still allowed her dad to comfort her. Of course then she remembered all the angst that went with bing in high school and promptly decided she was glad is it was over.
When Alexis got up to go to bed, Kate felt a thrill run down her spine. Being alone with Castle was not a new experience for her, and it wasn't like she was in danger of jumping him or anything, but they weren't at the precinct. They were at his loft. Not to mention the fact that he'd all but told her it was her home. So no, she wasn't worried she'd do something drastic, but the probability for awkwardness was incredibly high right now.
Castle was still the same Castle though, so he quickly tried to defuse any possible tension.
"If your locker runs dry, there's a whole closet full of clothes up in my mother's room. I'm not even one hundred percent sure she's actually moved out." He said it like they did this all the time, like she and his mother were bffs and were switching clothes everyday. She just stared at her mug, unsure exactly how to respond, and not wanting to watch his face when she did.
"That's okay, I think the dry cleaners have salvaged a few items."
"Yeah, you don't want to be wearing last season's Valentino."
"You know me so well." That was the thing, though, wasn't it? He knew her well enough not to bring up the case, or the fact that they didn't actually do this very often, well ever really.
She knew they couldn't avoid the subject forever though, so she decided she might as well bring it up herself. At least that way she could pretend she had control over it.
"Well, who would have thought that I would be homeless and caseless in one day?" It was about the most awkward way she could have possibly brought it up, but now it was out there. Kate just hoped Castle would find a way to make light of the situation, like he always did.
"I know I'm the king of going rogue, but you were right to chase after Dunn." So he was going for sweet and supportive instead of witty. He said it as if it was a fact, and somehow his believing it did make her fell better, just a little. But she couldn't deny that she had in fact gone rogue.
"And Agent Shaw was right to kick me off the case. I would have done the same thing if I was in her spot." She couldn't decide if the look on his face was pity or not, but she knew she didn't want his pity, or anyone's pity really. She'd been getting it for ten years; she didn't need it now, especially not from him. However, she did want him to understand, to realize that it was the truth, and she wasn't just being hard on herself.
"I'm too close to it." Under normal circumstances, she would never have admitted that, but then again, when had anything ever been normal with Castle?
"I'm sure after all this you're a little sorry you let me follow you around." Was he? He took a sip of his mug as if he hadn't just asked a huge question. She had been sorry she could do nothing about him tailing her, but that had ended a long time ago. When she told him he made her job a little more fun, she hadn't meant it lightly. It had been a long time since she'd felt she was letting him shadow her. She didn't think she'd ever go so far as to say she needed him around, but she was definitely liking it a lot more than she cared to admit.
And more importantly, all of this with Dunn, was about Dunn, not Kate, and certainly not Castle.
"No, not this. All the other annoying things that you do, but not this." She smiled at him, but he wasn't paying attention. She didn't want to ask the question, but she couldn't hold her curiosity any longer.
"What about you? Are you sorry that you ever wrote Heat Wave?" She really hoped he wasn't.
"The way I see it now, if it wasn't for Nikki Heat, this guy would have just gone on killing because he never would have met anyone smart enough to catch him."
Kate couldn't help but smile. He was being sweet again, like the time he'd called her extraordinary when she was worried about Will. It was moments like these that reminded her that he was so far from that millionaire playboy writer that he used to pretend he was.
"I'm speaking of course about Special Agent Shaw." And then he had to go and ruin it.
But she refused to let him get under her skin, not after everything he'd done for her today. Instead she threw a towel at his face.
"Night Castle."
"Goodnight."
Kate turned to walk up to the guest room, marveling at how easy and comfortable she was here. It should be that easy. But then again, why not?
AN2: Was that weird? I'm not completely convinced I got Beckett's thoughts right in this one. What do you guys think?
