D/C: I do not own nor profit from the works or characters of JRR Tolkien.
AN: Thank you for your continued support with this story. I want to send a personal thank you to MrsJohnReese for her ongoing support on this story, and for the more personal issues I've been facing. It really means a lot to me. Just know that we approach the quiet before the storm. I always enjoy your reviews and will do my best to respond personally to them. Thank you all!
Haldir returned to his talan to prepare for an evening meal in his home. He anticipated to have brothers eat with them so they may get to know this young woman, and perhaps come to see what he saw in her. Any questions they had for her, she could answer herself rather than asking him. With a sigh he pushed open his door. He was worn out from his outing with Berri, having enjoyed bonding with her in the clearing. Seeing her body in the open daylight was as thrilling as laying with her the first time. It was a new experience, one that he savored as a memory as he sat down on his bed tempted to nap.
His body was barely recovered when he was interrupted by a knock at the door.
"Brothers, what are you doing here so early?" Haldir stepped back as Rumil and Orophin made their way into his abode.
"We thought of coming over later, but we felt it best to discuss things before your friend joins us." Rumil smirked. "Besides, it is my understanding we will not be stationed together for long on the upcoming assignment." He made himself at home in Haldirs sitting room.
"Correct. We have a unit heading north towards Mirkwood in time." Haldir picked up a small cloth to begin dusting while Orophin began making tea.
"Whatever would Mirkwood need our help for?" Rumil snorted. "Their army is formidable, as their land requires it. Beyond that, Thranduil is adamant of having some of the most well trained soldiers around." He popped a grape into his mouth, indulging in the fruit that Haldir had left on the table.
"Remember, we attend other lands as emissaries. We do not go to war with Thranduil. We simply go to train, bring good will, and to strengthen the bonds between our lands." Orophin cut in, arranging a tray with cups and a kettle. "It has been a long time since we have gone to Mirkwood, however." He shrugged.
"It has been, but it seems that as of late, the Lord and Lady have insisted upon increased communications and trips of goodwill between Lorien and Mirkwood." Haldir frowned. "It has been that way for a little bit now."
Orophin took a seat, watching the oldest child tidy up. "Do you think there is something afoot that we do not yet know?" Orophin asked before sipping his tea.
"Anything is possible, Orophin, but if there is, then I am sure the Lord and Lady would tell us in due time." Haldir shook his head. It was unlike Galadriel to withhold such information from him, but of course, she rarely gave information that was incomplete. "Now, what was it you wanted to speak of?" He breathed, reaching to dust the top of a statue that sat in the corner of the room.
Rumil cleared his throat. "Haldir, I must ask you honestly." He brought his fingertips together. Haldir stopped and turned to the younger elf. "Have you, well, bonded with this young woman?" He arched a brow in curiosity.
"Bonded? Well, not really… I mean… How do I put this?" He took a deep breath, searching for the words, and hopefully delaying the next questions. He could not feel right lying to his own brothers, but he did not feel right betraying her trust either. 'They already know something has occurred, so I did not really tell them, now did I?' He reasoned hopelessly. "We have not bonded in the way elves do." He finally answered.
"In which way have you bonded then?" Rumil pressed.
"I think you know the answer to that." Orophin replied. Haldir nodded in agreement, happy to not have to say the words.
"You slept with her then? You engaged in a sexual relationship with her? Is that what you mean to say?" Rumil gave a crooked grin, between amused, shocked and horrified.
"Aye, I did." Haldir mumbled as he began sweeping.
"Do you realize what you have done?" Rumil lowered his voice. "Haldir, what will you do when she dies? Do you even intend on binding yourself to her for life?" He shook his head.
"I am sure Haldir thought of those things already. He is usually more responsible in his actions than we are." Orophin chuckled. "The consequences of bedding a human are sure to have crossed his mind at least a dozen times." He gave Haldir an encouraging smile that was not returned.
"I am afraid that this time, there was no thinking. Sleeping with her was an unplanned event that was upon me so fast, I just…" He struggled to justify himself.
"Haldir, do you plan to marry her?" Rumil asked; a look of concern on his face. Finally, he had nothing to smile about.
"Marry her? No, I… I'm much too old to marry now. Besides, she will die far too soon to make marriage a viable option. I'm sure she'd rather marry someone that will grow old with her, you know?" Haldir was flustered. "Perhaps if things were different, it would be an option, I don't know." He finally sat down, racked with a wave of guilt that made his stomach clench.
"What is it Haldir?" Orophin gave him a stern look. Of the three, Orophin seemed to have an old soul, and knew when things were amiss. He had seen this look many times over the years when Haldir struggled to hide things from him. "What have you done this time?"
Haldir strained and tried, but alas found he was failing to withhold what his brother wanted to know. "I was her first." He shook his head. "She wanted to save it until she was married, but she gave it to me instead." He groaned, placing an arm over his stomach.
"Oh, Haldir," Orophin shook his head. "Please tell me this is not so." He only watched as Haldir nodded. "Then you must do right by her." He urged. "Yes, her life will be short with you, but that does not mean you cannot remarry." He suggested.
"Yes, but then who would want to marry an elf that pledged himself to a human? That's almost as bad as pledging yourself to dwarf!" Rumil shot. "Had he not lain about with her, it may have never gotten to this point." He quipped. Though Orophin shot him a glare, Haldir could only nod.
"I hate to say, but he is right. It was a mistake to let it get this far, to lay with her at the riverside. It was wrong to take something so precious from her, even if she offered it. I knew I had no intention to marry her… But maybe I should. I'm so conflicted within." He suddenly lifted his head.
"That would be silly brother. You would be mocked! Already you are mocked for having spent so much time with this woman." Rumil laughed. "You would be better off to send her away, let her go be among her own kind. Let her marry some other elf, but do not cheapen your own station." He shook his head, feeling sorry for his brother.
"It would not be cheapening my station!" Haldir snapped a little louder than he had intended. Orophin jumped, startled by the volume. "I, I need time to think. I need time to figure out what to do. I care deeply for her, please understand this. Can I give her the life men generally want; to have children and grow old with their lovers? No, I cannot say that I can. But, does that mean I cannot try?" He spared a helpless look to his brothers, unsure of what to do, or what to say even in this moment.
"It is a decision that you must make, Haldir. Sooner than later, because if you care for her so, then she deserves the right thing." Orophin spoke. "Here, I will help you prepare for her arrival." He stood, and began straightening the table.
"I will help as well I suppose." Rumil hoisted himself off of the couch he had been sitting on and also went to work.
A few hours had passed before Beriadanwen arrived. Her pale yellow dress brushed the floor as she stepped in. "Good evening Berri." Haldir kissed her hand gently as he ushered her in to the sitting room.
"Good evening to you as well. Good evening to you, Orophin, Rumil." She greeted the other two elves that lingered in the sitting room. They returned the greeting before sitting down.
The night lingered on with laughter and conversation. Sometimes they spoke of serious things, and other times they spoke of life as children in Caras Galadhon. The stories Orophin regaled her with had her in stitches and crying with laughter. In turn she offered stories of her youth, both impressing and amusing the brothers. Some stories, Haldir had not even heard.
A moment of silence passed over them as they all seemed lost in their own thoughts. Berri turned her cup in her hands, watching the pale liquid wave side to side.
"So, Berri, I think we have been waiting all evening to broach this topic." Rumil finally broke. It was the moment that Berri was afraid of. She had hoped that she would not have to open up and discuss anything, but she supposed it would seem inevitable. Rumil had seemed far too interested that morning to hope that he would have let it go by this evening. "What is your relation with our dear brother?" He put his cup to his lips, watching her reaction as she squirmed and thought of an answer. Haldir stood and moved to a seat closer to Berri, resting his hand on hers.
"Um, what am I supposed to say?" Berri turned in her seat, her cheeks stained red.
"We have not discussed that yet." Haldir spoke, giving a slight squeeze to her arm. She felt a slight twinge of hurt, and a wave of relief to be able to move on from that conversation without divulging too much of their relation. She had hoped he would express a desire to announce an exclusive relationship between them, but she could not deny that they hadn't in fact discussed that step of their relationship.
She listened mostly as the brothers resumed talks ranging from everyday menial tasks, to their upcoming assignments and the goings on of the world near and beyond their borders. She smiled at the way they interacted so brightly. After so many long years, they still gossiped and bickered like new friends. She wasn't aware how much time had passed by until a yawn caught her off guard, her eyelids fluttering ever so lightly.
"It would seem we have bored your guest already." Orophin chuckled, noticing Berris head dropping lower.
"I apologize. I should turn in for the night." She set her cup down and stood with a sway. "Thank you for the entertainment and the conversation this evening. I will hope to see you around tomorrow." She gave a soft smile, feeling Haldir standing behind her.
"Shall I take you to your talan?" Haldir extended his hand.
"No Haldir, I don't want to take you from your company. I'll be fine, really. Good night." She sighed, before letting herself out into the warm breeze. Her head felt light as the scent of Mallorn wafted across her nose. It was a comforting scent, but one she could not describe. Far above, she spot golden Mallorn flowers peeking through the undersides of the rustling leaves. She took her time going back to her talan, opting to take in the hug of her surroundings.
Her bed was a comforting embrace as she settled in between the linens. It took her immediately away to a land of slumber, where her dreams brought her joy and unease at once.
