To Nobody: Thanks for the ideas you send and since I can't give you a private reply, I'll do it like this.

1. More violence is definitely coming your way soon.

2. I'm working on the torture, so don't worry.

3. A LOT of smut will be happening 3rd year and up. I know it's gotten pretty fluffy, and I assure you, that was not my intention. I don't know what happened there…

4. Definitely more insanity later too (I hope, but it's hard to write :/)

5. I'm trying with the pointless pranks, but I also don't want to stay in one year too long, since I have to do all 7 and it is already going to be past 150 chapters as it is.

But you are right about the random. It needs more random and I'll do my best to get it right :) Thanks again for the tips! (Definitely using the Dumbledore one)


The ride back to school was pretty much a blur to Harry. He could still hear Draco talk, but he didn't understand a single word the other was blabbing on about. He didn't have time to either. He still had to do that stupid potions essay.

"Are you seriously doing your homework now?!" Pansy demanded shocked.

"Yeah. Problem?" Harry asked, glaring at the girl.

Pansy paled and shook her head. Satisfied, Harry went back to work, scribbling furiously.

"Couldn't you work on it during the holidays?" Draco asked annoyed.

"No. Dad needed me for a job and after that I had to stay a whole week with a friend," Harry shrugged.
"And then my extra lessons muggle sciences started, so no potions at all."

"Muggle sciences?!" Pansy asked disgusted.

"What kind of 'job'?" Blaise asked.

Harry looked back up and grinned darkly at the dark skinned Pureblood.

"Wouldn't you like to know?"

Everyone fell silent, causing Harry's grin to widen before he looked back down at his essay. He blamed his dad for making him start studying the day after the New Year's party. The first day just with him, because all the other villains except for the Riddler were all still hungover while Joker had used a hangover potion. Worst part, he hadn't allowed Harry to take one, saying that Harry should learn to function under the worst conditions.

After that, his first lesson with Mr. Freeze had started. Math and Physics. It was interesting, sure, but Harry had barely recovered at all from New Year's Eve, so he had been very distracted and sleepy, which had caused the ice villain to give him an impromptu test. He failed of course, so after that, his lessons with both Freeze and the Riddler had doubled, and now here he was.

He hadn't had any time for Potions, or Transfigurations. He barely even found an extra ten minutes to explain to Gabe that he was a wizard. The poor 12 year-old had nearly fainted when Harry told him the whole thing about the prophesy, and his dead parents. He was especially shocked when Harry told him that the one he was prophesized to vanquish was the twin brother of the Joker.

The ride back to school was uneventful, so was the 'Welcome Back' feast. Dumbledore gave some crackpot speech again, which was good because Harry always loved a good laugh. Most of the other Slytherins weren't very amused by their Headmaster though, annoyed would be coming closer. Bitter and hateful in the case of some of the older students.

"Bloody weird, as always," Draco commented when Harry was done giving a standing ovation.

Harry laughed loudly at that. He didn't bother asking if Draco meant him or Dumbledore. Draco would just say he was talking about both of them, and he'd be right too.

After the feast, everyone was getting ready to go back to the dorm, as it was getting quite late. In half an hour, curfew would start. Harry was talking with Draco and Blaise, trying to get the two boys to join him in his daily morning runs.

"It's healthy and fun! You'll feel ten times better after!" he tried.

"How early do you wake up for that anyway?" Draco asked.

"At 6 every morning. I do stretches, and then I go running. I try to be back at 7, but I always lose track of time in the showers. I mean, they're freaking steam showers! I could stay in for hours!"

"I'm not waking up at 6 o'clock every morning to go running," Draco muttered.

"Maybe Quinn's right though," Blaise said.
"A healthy mind in a healthy body and all that."

"And since when is Quinn the poster boy of a healthy mind?" the blond asked skeptically.

Harry and Blaise laughed at that, making Draco glower at the two of them. Suddenly, the shadow of Snape's intimidating figure fell over the trio, making Draco and Blaise fall silent while Harry grinned brightly at the man.

"How can we help you, teach?" Harry asked cheerfully.

Draco and Blaise winced at the way Harry addressed their head of House, but Snape didn't react to it beyond scowling deeply at him.

"Headmaster Dumbledore wants to see you, Quinzel," he said monotonously.

Harry blinked innocently and kept his face blank. His dad had warned him that Dumbledore would want to see him and talk about where he'd been and what he'd done in the past 6 years. They'd gone over it all, and agreed that Harry would tell the truth about the Dursleys' treatment. That should distract Dumbledore enough from everything else.

"Did he say why he wanted to see me?" Harry asked.
"Like, is it an emergency, because in that case I'll have my assistant free a spot in my schedule. Otherwise, I'm afraid my earliest free spot is… the first Tuesday in three months in the early afternoon."

"Come with me, Quinzel. Now," Snape hissed.

"Alright!" Harry replied, raising his hands in a placating manner.
"It was just a joke, jeez! Way to ruin the mood professor."

"Quinn…" Draco said warningly.

"I'm going! I'm going!"

He grinned at Snape and motioned for him to lead the way, making the Potions Master scowl annoyed before he swept past Harry towards where Harry guessed was the Headmaster's office.

Harry was led towards the Griffin statue and waited calmly while Snape muttered the password ("Lemon Drops"). If the greasy bat had expected Harry to be awed or surprised as the stone statue slid away and revealed a staircase, he was sorely disappointed. Harry just stared at it blankly and stepped on the moving stairs, before he started grinning.

"Who said wizards are behind? You even got escalators!" he giggled.

Snape just scowled, but didn't reply as he turned away and walked back from where they had come.

"Try to make it back before curfew, Quinzel," the man drawled before he disappeared from Harry's sight.

Harry just shrugged and waited calmly until he reached a wooden door. With a sigh, he walked up to it and knocked.

"Come in!" Dumbledore called.

Quickly, Harry readied himself for the meeting he was about to have by styling his expression to nervous curiosity. He couldn't let the old man know anything yet. He had to come over as innocent and sweet, yet still a true Slytherin. It would be hard, but if he could win the old fool's trust, it would be worth it, he was sure. He slowly pushed the door open and peeked inside, as if making sure it really was alright for him to enter. Dumbledore smiled encouragingly and waved him over.

"Good evening, my Boy," the old Headmaster greeted.
"Come sit down. Do you want a lemon drop?"

Harry shook his head.

"If you don't mind, sir. I'd like to know why I'm here?" he said quietly.
"Did… did I do something wrong? I swear it was just harmless fun! Just a joke! I don't know who complained but-"

"No one complained, my dear boy," the old man chuckled.
"And this is no such visit, though I should warn you not to follow the Weasley twins' advice too much."

Harry grinned at him. He wasn't following anyone's advice. All his pranks were his own, but if the idiot wanted to blame someone else, it was fine by him.

"Then why did you send me here?" he asked curiously.

"Just for a little talk, my boy," Dumbledore replied.
"Ever since your disappearance 6 years ago, I and many other wizards have been looking for you, yet we never got a hold of your location. I'm quite surprised the owl could find you in fact."

"My dad's a bit paranoid," Harry explained sheepishly.
"He used to work for a muggle criminal, but eventually testified against him. Ever since, he keeps really strong wards around our house, so they won't find him."

Most of it wasn't lying. The Joker really was a paranoid fucker, and he had set up extremely powerful wards around the house and the warehouse they lived before that. And though Joker really had worked for another criminal before becoming the Joker, he wasn't scared of them. He killed them all anyway.

"And if you don't mind me asking: how exactly did you come to this new family?" Dumbledore asked.
"The last of your stories that circulated was that they kidnapped and brainwashed you. Another one is I believe that they saved you from a gang of witch-hunters?"

"They technically did kidnap me, since they were never able to officially adopt me," Harry shrugged smirking.
"I just don't like talking about my past much, so I tell everyone a ton of plausible and less plausible stories and let them build their own truth from those."

Dumbledore chuckled, his blue eyes twinkling in amusement as he nodded understandingly.

"And will you tell me the truth then, Harry?" he asked smiling.

Harry's expression turned frigid and the question and glared at his Headmaster.

"Why would I?" he asked coldly.
"You're the one that left me at the Dursleys, didn't you?"

"Ah… Hagrid told me about your claim of abuse, but-"

"Claim?!" Harry hissed angrily, jumping up from his seat.
"I can show you the fucking scars you hypocrite bastard! They beat, burned, cut and whipped me almost daily! I was forced to sleep in a tiny cupboard and whenever they suspected I did something 'freakish' they'd lock me in there and refuse me food and water!"

"I-I'm sure there might have been some tension, my boy, but they're your family-" Dumbledore started shakily.

"They hated me and I hated them!" Harry shouted red faced.
"I've seen the letter you know. They kept it, too scared to throw it out. You fucking threatened them to raise me! What the fuck did you expect? That they'd love it?! If you thought they would take good care of me, you wouldn't have to threaten them in the first place! You knew they hated magic, and you still left me with them! What they did to me for four fucking years is your fault! You think you're some kind of Gandalf?! Well guess what! I'm not Frodo, so fuck off!"

With that, Harry took a deep breath and calmed down so fast that Dumbledore thought there was a completely different boy in front of him all of a sudden. Harry gave a charming smile and carded a hand through his messy hair, styling it a bit neater.

"Now if you'll excuse me, but Professor Snape was very clear that I should be back in the dorm before curfew, so I best be off."

Giving another blinding smile, Harry turned around and walked out, leaving a completely shell-shocked Dumbledore behind.

. . . . .

The next morning, Harry actually succeeded in getting both Blaise and Draco to join him on his morning run. It was a bit of a hassle at first, since Draco refused to get up and then Harry had to find both purebloods some training pants, and neither wanted the purple ones with green polka dots.

For a moment, both Blaise and Draco had nearly freaked out again when Malinda slithered out from underneath Harry's bed and started hissing at Harry. The purple haired boy laughed and allowed the snake to hide in the kangaroo pocket in his bright yellow hoodie until they were outside and he let her out again when they passed by the Forbidden Forest to let her hunt.

In the end, they had to cut it short after only half an hour since neither pureblood had any experience running that long and were already out of breath. Neither Draco nor Blaise wanted to admit it though, and just blamed their short trip on each other. They all took a shower, Harry a little longer than the other two and then went to the Great Hall for breakfast, 45 minutes earlier than Harry usually arrived.

"I hope next time, Blaise can keep up better," Draco said haughtily.

"Me?! You're the one that couldn't go another step!" Blaise exclaimed offended.

"Of course I could keep going! It's just beneath me to run," the blond grumbled.

Harry chuckled and shook his head amused. Both of them were idiots in his mind.

"Harry," Dumbledore suddenly spoke up right next to the trio.
"About last night, I would like to-"

Harry could already tell where this was going and he didn't like it at all, so he quickly plastered a large, happy smile on his face and turned towards his teacher.

"Good morning, Gandalf," he said pleasantly.

His classmates all scowled in confusion, none of them really understanding what he meant by that. Dumbledore raised a curios brow, the second one raising along with it as two Ravenclaws snorted. Harry grinned at the two kids and wiggled his eyebrows at them.

One of them was a fifth year girl with blond hair and a prefect badge on her chest. The other was one of Harry's classmates, Anthony Goldstein. Harry knew that Goldstein was a half-blood, meaning he might have seen the movies. The girl, Clearwater he thought her name was, was probably either a half-blood or a muggleborn too.

"Wonderful movies, I admit," Dumbledore smiled.
"I guess it's the beard, isn't it, my Boy?"

"I guess it is, sir," Harry replied grinning.

Dumbledore continued on towards the teacher's table. As soon as the Headmaster was gone, Draco turned his face towards Harry with a deep frown tugging his brows down while the other Slytherins sitting around them looked at him curiously.

"What the hell was that about, Quinn?" he asked.

"Nothing," Harry shrugged.
"I told Dumbledore that I'm not playing his game yesterday, and I just reminded him of that again."

"Good. Dumbledore's games are usually nothing good," Blaise murmured.

Harry grinned darkly at that.

"Neither am I."