A/n: Hi everyone. Please read this! I don't, really really don't want to beg for reviews and say 'I won't post if I don't get that much' or put it in bold and capital letters at every chapter, or other things like that.
I hoped that anyone who liked the story would review. Many of you do already do (and I thank those again for all the support!), but many don't. I wonder if there's anything I can do to change that?
I don't want to be annoying and whiny. I come in peace! I will keep posting no matter what. But my life would look a lot brighter if a heap of reviews were awaiting me every day. :D (as I'm sure is the same for everyone who writes stories on fanfiction, and I try to review every time I read a story, but unfortunately, I spend much more time writing than actually reading fanfictions)
With this said, I'm sorry for the little bit of begging, and here comes the good part! :D
Chapter 25.
Lily and James
Moments after the revelation that Draco would attend a school in Somerset starting September, Mrs. Malfoy's car stopped by the gate of the school. She didn't park very well and seemed in a hurry when she jumped out and walked towards the group of four, her eyes scanning each head with the different hair colours.
"Oh." She said. "Are these friends of yours, Draco?" She inquired politely. Harry thought her eyes lingered just a little longer on Hermione. But she had clearly not expected to see either her or Ron by her son's side.
Draco shrugged. It was his answer to all questions he didn't want to answer. The boy was probably not yet comfortable to call Weasley and Granger 'friends' just yet. He was there mainly for Harry. In fact, the reason he had made the first step to join the trio during breaks was because there seemed to be a little snake in his stomach, and it had hissed in his ear, saying that the brown-haired girl and the ridiculous-looking Weasley were stealing his time with the youngest one. The little snake had not anticipated that he would come to like the two 'thiefs', however. But the snake wasn't going to admit it easily either.
Narcissa was satisfied with the vague answer. She berated him for the rudeness of it, but it also meant that Draco was open to the idea of becoming friends with them, since he hadn't protested. She inquired further.
"They're Harry's friends." Draco explained to his mother.
Narcissa hesitated for a moment, but she had no time to think about it thoroughly. She decided to just go for it, and hope for the best. She had a good feeling about this.
"It's Draco's birthday tomorrow." She prompted.
Exclamations of surprise and congratulations flooded from the three younger ones. But even though Harry smiled and wished a happy birthday, it made him realise now even more than before, and more than any of the snide comments the blond had made in the past, that Draco was really much older than him. Because Draco would turn eleven, that was four more than seven. And Harry would have to wait two full months before turning eight and catching up again.
The raven didn't look forward to his own birthday though. It was more like a nightmare looming in the shadows. It inevitably reminded him of his last birthday. One he had celebrated in another lifetime.
Harry didn't have time to linger on such grim thoughts, for Narcissa (ignoring a few social conventions) had already jumped to inviting them for some birthday cake the next day after school, which made Draco whine 'mom!' in humiliation and discontent.
Hermione and Ron seemed reluctant. They both liked Draco much more than before, but they still felt that the distance between them and him was far greater than the one between them and Harry. Harry was the link, without him they would not be together.
Thinking that it was because their parents wouldn't be happy letting them visit schoolmates on a week night, and so close to end of year exams, Narcissa proposed that they visit the next Saturday, to celebrate her son's eleventh birthday. She wanted it to be the most fun it could be for him, knowing that it hadn't always been easy to create a celebratory atmosphere in the past, with Severa there, and Lucius calling…
The Weasley family gathered a little further, and Mrs. Malfoy soon found Mrs. Weasley to ask permission for Ron to come. Mrs. Weasley was so charmed by Mrs. Malfoy's grace and manners that it was soon agreed.
Harry also agreed immediately of course, and so only Hermione was left. She promised she would ask her parents about it. Her father was supposed to pick her up at the gate, but he seemed to be running late. So Mrs. Malfoy could not speak to him directly.
Narcissa thanked Hermione, looking intensely at her, wondering whether she would ever make a nice girlfriend for her precious Draco. All mothers liked to make such plans for the future, or at least daydream about it. She made the impression to be a sweet and bright girl.
"I'm sorry we can't stay longer," Narcissa continued in her polite manner, but still slightly hurried. "I remembered just an hour ago that Draco had a doctor's appointment. We really need to go." She smiled warmly. "Come, Draco."
The blond followed his mother reluctantly tot eh car. He hated it when she planned parties for him and invited people without his consent. Harry was no problem of course, but he'd preferred to have just Harry. He didn't say goodbye, didn't wave from the car, and refused to say a word to his mother for the remainder of the day.
In the meantime, Ron's family was ready to set off home, for Mrs. Weasley still had to cook dinner for God-knew-how-many people. Harry usually walked most of the way home with the Weasley's, when he didn't go to the Malfoy's for the evening meal, or straight to Hagrid's. But since Hermione was still waiting for her father to show up, he decided to stay behind with her until then.
He hadn't had the time to recover from the shock of the news about Draco leaving, he'd only had time to hide it, and being among the noisy redheaded gang meant he'd have to keep it under control for so much longer. With only the girl next to him, he could let himself relax more.
Harry and Hermione went to sit on a bench in the school courtyard and set Harry's stack of papers from Snape beside them.
"Are you going to do it? Are you going to complete all those assignments?" She asked as she nodded toward the sheets.
"Probably." He shrugged, much in the same way Draco had just earlier. "I have two years to do it." He thought of the many hours of boredom that would come when he would no longer be able to spend time with Draco. He tried to convince himself to feel relief. After all, he wouldn't have to take all the arrogance and possessiveness over his mother, and jealousy, and superiority.
The problem was he liked the good times with grey-eyes too much to be happy about missing the bad times.
"I'll help you!" Hermione offered, sounding much too enthusiastic about such a ridiculously heavy task. Harry suspected her of being envious of him and all the extra work the literature class gave him. She soaked up knowledge the way Dudley soaked up fat and sugar.
Harry smiled his thanks, but frowned at the assignment sheets and notes. Even though he knew he would do it, if only out of curiosity or boredom, he felt it was pointless. He would never be able to hand them in to Snape. She would be in Somerset, and he would never set foot there. He would never be able to go to a boarding school. Aunt Petunia and uncle Vernon could not afford it, and even if they could, they would never do him such pleasure.
Maybe he shouldn't do the assignments, he thought in dejection; only to be reminded a second later of the true reason he wanted to read such difficult books, why he had joined Snape's class in the first place. Read as much as you can. It's the best way to learn and broaden your mind. His father had said. They had been his last words, before he left that morning and never returned.
The raven hated himself for even thinking of giving up. His father would never say anything to him again. Those were the only words he had from him, the ones he remembered so clearly. It was the only advice from him he could ever get. He had no choice but to follow it. As soon as he could, he would start the assignments, and he would keep on working until he was certain his father would be proud of what he'd achieved.
"It's wonderful that Draco's going to St-James' College." Hermione filled the silence, apparently daydreaming about entirely different things. Of course, she would admire such establishments, and the fact that Draco was going was to her proof of his intelligence.
Harry merely grunted, not able to think of anything suitable to say. He didn't exactly agree with her. Yes, Draco was suited for an institution like that, but Harry wasn't.
"I'd like to go." Hermione continued, expressing Harry's thoughts. "I mean, we still have two more years, but it's not easy to get into such good schools. We should be searching and applying already."
"You know St-James?" Harry wondered. The name only had sounded very fancy to him, so he'd assumed it was an establishment for the elite, but his friend seemed to know what she was talking about.
"Of course. We have only two years to get ready, you know!" She said as she realised two years wasn't such a long time after all. "There are many things to think about. There are tests to pass, fees to pay, uniforms to buy…"
The more Hermione got excited over it, the more it made Harry's head spin. The little hope he'd had of ever getting into the same school Draco was going to, and continuing the literature lessons, was crushed. There was no way he could ever take care of all that by himself. He wasn't smart enough, and he didn't have the money. And it was so scary, thinking about all those serious things, about choices and courses and uniforms and elite classmates…
The weekend of Draco's birthday celebration came, and all three of the trio were present. Surprisingly, there was no one else. Harry had expected Draco's friends to be there, and seeing Hermione and Ron's faces, they had too. But there was no one else.
Mrs. Malfoy tried to convince Draco that they all go to the swimming pool, or the zoo, or some other place a little more festive than the living room, but before she could get her son out of his shell of stubbornness, she had a call from work and she had to leave immediately.
In the end, it was Miss Snape who came over to watch the children. And it was very clear that she would have preferred to be dismantling a ticking atomic bomb than being there. So the four friends stayed in the garden all afternoon, eating cake, playing imaginary Quidditch or listening to each other's inventions.
Hermione had come to create an elaborate system for the ministry of magic. She knew a little about politics, and she told them about the different departments. They were all annoyed after that because she wouldn't say what was in the department of mysteries.
Ron, who was so thrilled with Harry's Quidditch idea, hadn't hesitated to talk about the different stores where you could buy different kinds of brooms and all the maintenance materials. Instead of maths exercises, his notebooks contained drawings of Comets, Cleansweeps, Nimbus's and his favourite: the Firebolt.
Hermione added to that the stores for magical pets, adding Hedwig into the owl category; as well as an apothecary for the ingredients for Potions lessons at Hogwarts, and most importantly: Flourish & Blotts, the bookstore.
Harry was most occupied with Charms and Transfiguration and Defence Against the Dark Arts, and he proposed 'Ollivanders' as the wand shop, 'the best wand maker in Britain'.
And finally, Draco was only too happy to make a little detour on the dark side and he came up with Borgin & Burkes, which held all kinds of objects to satisfy anyone's fantasies.
During the long afternoon, they mixed all of this together and created Diagon Alley, with Knockturn Alley on the side for the illegal stuff. Every world needs a black market, an underground business.
Hermione and Draco made notes of everything, drawing maps even, and Ron was quite good at drawing the things they described. Harry was often the one they turned to when they needed names for shops or people.
Every time they came together after that, they either invented new things, or pretended to step into that world. They rode the Hogwarts Express, rode the carriages to the castle, wandered the halls and learned new spells and funny curses. They imagined themselves cursing the teachers they disliked, or running from trolls and dragons, or that their plates would suddenly fill with the most delicious foods by magic.
Not everything was always as peaceful and perfect and in harmony though. It happened from time to time that they quarrelled about certain aspects of the Hogwarts game. For example, Hermione was not at all happy with Draco's idea of House Elves who would so all the work for them, like slaves. And Ron was strongly opposed to the Ordinary Wizarding Levels and the Nastily Exhausting Wizarding Tests Hermione had introduced at the end of the fifth and seventh years of wizarding school.
Moreover, the rivalry between Slytherin and Gryffindor became very real at times. So much so that it took an intervention from Mrs. Malfoy to somewhat shake them awake and get them back to reality. Even the calm and rational Hermione was so absorbed in the game that she forgot that they weren't actually rivals.
The end of year tests came and went, and summer was back. Between the four of them, much time was spent with one or the other. Harry slept over at Draco's or Ron's sometimes, but never at Hermione's. (Her parents never offered him to stay overnight, probably because he was a boy. And she never stayed the night with any of the boys either.) He visited Hermione though, when the Weasleys were away, or Ron, when the Granger's were away. Draco was reluctant to go to Ron's or Hermione's house, but he did join them on their visits to Hagrid. They all went to Draco's, to Mrs. Malfoy's greatest delight.
No one stayed with Harry of course. They had all seen the Dursleys, and none of them liked them, though they didn't suspect just how unfriendly they could be. No one would propose to go to Harry's house.
But even though they all saw each other a lot, whether they were all together or not, there were many days that Harry would end up alone. Hermione and Ron went on vacations with their families, and Draco had a lot of work to do to prepare his first year at St-James in Somerset. He visited the school and dormitories with his mother, went shopping for uniforms and supplies, went to welcoming parties to get to know his classmates and where the parents could meet each other.
Even Hagrid was often busy at his cabin near the forest, releasing animals or walking through the forest to look for wounded creatures, or simply to walk around and keep the garbage and unwelcome people out. Hagrid was in his element there.
The hottest days of summer were the worst. Aunt Petunia was pale as a ghost and would not go outside in the sun. So all the gardening had to be done by Harry at those times. He got multiple sunburns on his neck and shoulders, but he would not get tan. Once the redness was gone and his skin had peeled off, the new skin underneath was just as pale as before. Not like Petunia of course, and not even as pale as his blonde friend, but still, it was strangely non-tanned, and it was a reason more for the Dursleys to think of him as a weird creature to be avoided.
The hottest days were also the worst because Harry never stayed indoors, or as little as possible. The more he was at home, the more he was in the way of the Dursleys, and the higher the odds of Uncle Vernon getting angry and losing control, especially when he'd had a bad day at work.
Harry was still the black sheep, and every little thing that went wrong was always his fault. He got yelled at quite a bit, though real beatings were rare. Usually he just got a few slaps, but twice the head of the family got really mad, vein-popping mad, and Harry hadn't run away quickly enough. The bruises were bad enough that he hadn't dared to see his friends until a week later.
Dudley was also an enemy to be avoided. He was the same age as Draco, and though he was shorter than grey-eyes, he was much broader and heavier. Also, he had friends, with the same kind of brains and amusements. If they found Harry on the streets somewhere, they chased him on their bikes, throwing sticks and sometimes stones and gravel. And if they caught him, Harry would come home with a few extra bruises or even a bloody nose.
Overall, Harry's summer consisted of very happy, exhilarating moments, and very lonely, miserable moments. And if Hedwig didn't come by, the nights were the hardest. Because when the raven was alone and had nothing to do to keep him busy, nothing to think of, his thoughts would invariably wander to the previous summer. The heat reminded him of the room that had been his own, where he'd slept, where his parents had kissed him good night, where he'd fled when it was too hot outside, where he'd read with a fan next to him to cool off.
At nights this summer, the raven cried a lot, more than he'd ever done before. He cried because he missed his parents, and each day made him realise more and more that he would never see or hear them again. It was forever. And that forever was too long! He was already forgetting things. He was already losing details. What colour were the walls in his parent's study, what shape was the front door? What was the last meal his mother cooked, what did they talk about in the evenings?
Such things were slipping away from him. He couldn't remember every sweater his mother had, or every pair of glasses his father had worn and broken. He panicked, wondering if he would someday forget their faces. Would he forget the sounds of their voices? The feeling of their lips against his forehead?
The raven lost his parents over and over, every night. He lost the little pieces, without him even noticing. Suddenly he would realise something had slipped away again, and it was too painful. So he clutched to his dream tighter, the mountain dream. The blood horrified him, and his stomach-less mother made him scream into his pillow as he woke up. But it was something that linked him to them, it was something he remembered.
Maybe if he could remember the real events, if he could recall that one day when his life was shattered to pieces, he could remember all that he had lost, and engrave it into his memory forever, so that he would not lose Lily and James more than he already had.
Now I have a question for you:
Is the story progressing too slowly? I am planning to get to the flashforwards eventually, but maybe it's too long. Should I skip more? What are your thoughts?
And here are a few answers:
To Kidscatscuz: It's not really going to get bad with the Durlseys. Many fanfictions depict them as monsters, but I don't think they are. I think they are mostly stupid, or have never learned to think properly for themselves, and can't deal with their problems and emotions. And Harry is unfortunately caught in this dysfunctional situation. But he can deal with it. His biggest problems will come from another source. ;-)
And secondly, Snape (who is a woman, just to be clear) does not expect Harry to go to boarding school, and didn't know his parents (at least not personally). The reason she gave him those notes and assignments is that she recognized potential in him. She doesn't want to give him any special treatment, so this is the only way she could find to give him a chance to maybe do something with that potential. But the responsibility lies with Harry.
To potterbuncker: Narcissa, as you noticed, is trying hard to be a good mother to redeem herself, and to give Draco the best chances and thus education to succeed in life. But she doesn't always know what she's doing, and if it is the right thing to do. She matured quite late and is still learning how to be a responsible adult. As to what she will do when Draco is not with her, she does not know. But she feels it is an opportunity to spend more time on her career.
I hope these answers are helpful ^^
If there are any other questions about characters or events, I will try and answer all of them without giving away any spoilers ;-)
Thank you all for following, favoriting, reviewing and even reading. I still like reviews the best, because then I can have real contact with you. Otherwise being an author is kind of lonely :(
