Hi everyone, it's been a long time but i finally managed to get this done. I want to say thank you to everyone who sent me msgs about this story and asked if i was going to finish it. Rest assured i most definitely am, it may just take me some time so i am asking for you to bear with me and my looney tunes mind. Hopefully people are still interested in this and it was worth the wait :)
28 – One Night To Be Confused
September 3rd - Dante's POV
One night to be confused
One night to speed up truth…
Sleep never found me; in fact I had spent most of the night driving in circles around Lulu's neighborhood. I had made it as far as her door, poised to confront her about possibly being pregnant but my mother's warning about not ambushing her kept me from knocking. The previous mistake about Lulu and Johnny had left a terrible stain on our relationship, so the last thing I wanted was to make another assumption that would likely be the final nail in the coffin.
When I finally went home it was about 3:00 A.M and my mind was consumed with thoughts of whether I was going to be a father or not. On one hand I definitely did want children, and of all the women I dated Lulu was definitely at the top of the list as future mother of my children, but having them now was definitely not a part of the plan. Doing the mental math I concluded that she could not be that far along and the baby would be born sometime in May or early June. In theory we should be divorced by then.
Realizing the spiral my mind was creating I tried to shake away the obsessive thoughts and think rationally. We were usually careful, so the chances of Lulu getting pregnant the random time we were negligent was slim to none… at least that was what I told myself while trying to push away the sudden reminder of all those high school talks about abstinence and 'it only takes one time'. Unfortunately, ignoring my conscience did not help me to sleep and I watched the minutes tick by, waiting for the first sign of daylight so I could go see Lulu. This was not a conversation I wanted to have over the phone.
Lulu's POV
Mornings were not my favorite time of day. The sun had barely been in the sky for an hour, yet I was up and already at work. Maxie and I had a few last minute details to take care of at Crimson and around town, then we had to go to the party venue early to make sure everything was set up the way it was supposed to be. Undoubtedly it was going to be a long day and night so we had to start getting things done as early as possible.
Maxie had called a few minutes ago to say she was almost here, and I could only hope her being late was because she had finally told Johnny she was pregnant. Even after a few days she still had not quite wrapped her head around the situation and was avoiding it at every turn. Each day she swore to tell Johnny, then would find reasons not to and promised to do it tomorrow. Tomorrow still had not come. Luckily morning sickness was not one of her symptoms therefore no one would be the wiser for the time being, but she still needed to take care of herself so I threatened to tell Johnny if she did not at least make a doctor's appointment. I would never have actually told him, but the bluff got her to make the appointment so I was satisfied.
The ding of the elevator made me swivel my chair towards the sound and I watched my best friend step into the main office in a summery yellow wrap dress, with light blue pumps that looked to be at least four and a half inches high. She was nowhere near showing, but the few extra pounds had gone to the right places making her seem even more alluring. If there was one thing I could bet on was that Maxie would make pregnancy look fabulous.
I raised an eyebrow in silent question, looking at her expectantly as I had done every morning for the past days.
"Tomorrow I promise." She answered as usual, dropping her purse on the desk and sitting down just as I got up.
I rolled my eyes, musing to myself that at this rate when she was nine months pregnant and about to pop she would still be saying tomorrow. But who was I to judge because if the situation was reversed I would have a hard time telling Dante as well. "If I don't see you here when I get back, I'll meet you at the party."
Maxie nodded and went about handling things at the Crimson office, while I left to take care of last minute details.
~#~
Outside was a lot brighter and busier than I had left it, with people now bustling in the summer heat to get to work and start their day. I walked to the cafe around the corner hoping to get an espresso that would make me more energized, when a small mannequin display caught my eye. It was a turquoise pleated dress with brown flowers and a brown band tied around the waist into a bow, paired with tiny turquoise and gold flats, and accessorized with the same colored headband. The style was adorably girly, but the colors allowed a fashionable charm that would have been lost if the dress was pink or some other overly feminine color. The other displays in the window were very cute as well - things Maxie would definitely love - and even though it was way too early to be buying baby gifts there was no harm in taking peek so I knew what to get when the shower rolled around.
Pulling the door to the store, I immediately melted into a puddle of 'awws' and 'how cute' when I saw all the baby clothes and accessories. There was just something about baby stores that could make even the most child averse women think of what it would be like to be a mother, if only for a split second. I picked up a blanket that resembled a quilt with different patchworks of pastel colors, and it was so soft I could not stop running my fingers across the fabric.
"That's one of our best sellers, perfect for a boy or girl." A voice said from behind me.
I removed my hand from the blanket and turned to the origin: a tall woman who looked to be in her 50's with pale green eyes, and strawberry blonde hair highlighted with streaks of grey.
"I was just looking." I confessed, still enamored by all the baby things. What I loved about the clothes and accessories here were that they were fashionable, yet still had a whimsical childlike look without being overbearing of traditional pinks and blues. "You have a great store."
She smiled appreciatively. "A lot of moms now prefer trendy and comfortable rather than frills and lace. Especially the younger ones like you."
"Oh no, I'm looking for a friend." I quickly clarified, startled at being mistakenly referred to as a mother. Sometime in the distant, distant, distant future if I found the right man and it was the right time I would love to have children, but at this point of my life I could not imagine having another human being completely dependent on me. Just the thought of it was completely overwhelming and terrifying. "It's probably too early to even be thinking of gifts, but I saw the dress in the window and couldn't help myself."
The lady laughed and waved away my comment with a swirl of her wrist. "It's never too early for gifts, especially for babies, they're here before you know it." She moved around the space with familiarity that could only be gained from spending hours here, and stopped in front of a wall with rows of shelves. "I take it you don't know if it's a boy or girl so I would do onsies for now; they're a staple to every baby's wardrobe."
There was an entire wall full of onesies to choose from: some in solid colors, others with multicolor, patterns and words written on them. A white one with purple letters that read 'Mommy's Diva, Daddy's Princess' caught my eye because it was so Maxie and Johnny. I imagined any daughter of theirs would unquestionably be those things and more. There was always a chance the baby could be a boy, but it was too cute to pass up so I took I as a sign that maybe the baby would be a girl. "I'll take this one."
Apartment
This morning I was determined to not be late for the party, yet it was almost seven and I was nowhere near dressed. I quickly opened the door, mentally calculating that I had 45 minutes to shower, do my hair, makeup and get dressed. Who was I kidding? For me that would be impossible and I was undoubtedly going to be late. At least I had the forethought to stop for a late lunch so I did not have to worry about finding something to eat now.
Heading to my bedroom, Maxie's door was ajar and I peeked inside to see her standing in front of a full length mirror dressed in a short purple one shoulder dress. She looked beautiful but there was something off about the reflection staring intently back it her. It was only when Maxie turned to the side I noticed the round bulge protruding from her stomach, obviously caused by a pillow or cushion. I smiled finding it sweet that she wanted to see the physical changes that would take place in a few months. The image was beautiful despite her deep seeded fears of no longer being attractive, yet there was everything but happiness or contentment in the face of this usually vivacious woman.
"If this is how you plan on telling Johnny, you get points for shock value and creativity." I joked, finally making my presence known and walking into the room.
Lost in the mirror image that was her yet still not quite her, Maxie rubbed her pretend belly for a moment then pulled the mini pillow from beneath the dress and tossed it on the bed. With a heavy sigh and an even heavier heart, she smoothed out any wrinkles that may have formed and secured a black belt around her waist. "Maybe there won't be anything to tell."
Maxie's POV
It might be so easy to make this go away without Johnny being the wiser. A quick trip to a hospital in another town, or even in the city and all the anxiety of weight gain, stretch marks, swollen ankles, crazy cravings and hormonal mood swings would disappear. Johnny and I could continue to enjoy our lives and each other until we actually planned to have children; if we even wanted children. Days like this where my day did not follow the normal hours of work were more proof that my life was not suitable for children; not to mention I knew absolutely nothing about taking care of a baby full time.
Lulu stood about a foot behind me watching with concern through our reflections in the mirror. "Did something happen?" She asked unsure.
I wanted to scream yes something happened: I'm pregnant and still not sure that I want to be. I thought I could handle this; that after some time of letting the idea sink in I would feel less torn, but it had not happened yet and I was worried it never would.
"You know I've never had a pet… well I never actually wanted one 'cuz I always thought it was too much work, but Georgie did. She would have been good with a pet; taking care of it and all that." Lulu sat on the edge of the bed listening intently, making no judgments while I continued to talk. "When my mom and dad left, Mac hovered around me and Georgie trying to make it okay for us. Georgie was the smart one, the good girl, so Mac didn't have to worry much about her, but I acted out all the time and Georgie would cover for me and take care of me, especially if I came home wasted. Robin was practically perfect, always there to listen and give big sister advice even if I didn't listen. In my entire life I've never had to take care of, or protect anyone; I was the one who everyone felt the need to protect. They make it seem like it's only because of my heart but I know it's because I'm such a mess. How am I supposed to be responsible for a baby? What if I forget to feed it, or I leave it somewhere, or worse if I disappear like my mom and dad?"
I was not looking for sympathy or trying to be difficult, I was just very overwhelmed. The more time passed it was one step closer to me having to tell Johnny and actually having this baby. The thought terrified me because I knew like it or not everything would change.
Lulu pulled me by the arm to sit next to her, and I dropped onto the bed with a dramatic huff. "I think this pregnancy has completely scrambled your brain because you take care of a lot of people." My eyes rolled in a 'yeah right' manner but I did not comment. "Remember when I was in Shadybrook? We were barely on civil terms and you could have easily said I was the one who killed Logan but you covered for me. I've seen you babysit Emma dozens of times and you never once ignored her or left her alone, you make sure she's always safe. When Lisa was trying to ruin Patrick and Robin's marriage, you did everything you could to make sure that didn't happen. You're constantly trying to set up Mac because you want him to find the happiness that you and Robin have. And don't get me started on Johnny; you're so good for him, better than me or anyone else could be."
"But…"
She cut me off instantly. "But nothing! Face it Maxie, you're a good person, deal with it." Then her voice calmed and I knew she was just trying to help. "Whatever you choose I'll support you but don't make a decision thinking you're not good enough, because the truth is no mom is perfect."
I imagined to Lulu I must have sounded like the most ungrateful and selfish person in the world for considering not having this baby, but she never passed a word of judgment. Instead my best friend engulfed me in a hug, and I sat there for a moment resting my head against her shoulder grateful for the comfort. "If I do this don't let me screw it up okay?" I pleaded quietly, knowing that I would need all the help I could get over the next few months.
"You have nothing to worry about. This kid is going to have two awesome parents, an overprotective great uncle, a brilliant, kind cousin, a guardian angel aunt and a[i]VERY[/i] cool godmother."
"The best godmother... Who loves to babysit." I added playfully.
We pulled away laughing and she nudged me lightly on the shoulder before getting off the bed. "You should go to the party before Kate fires us both. We're bordering late and I still need to get dressed."
I nodded as Lulu took off down the hallway to get ready.
~#~
After taking one last look in the mirror to make sure everything was flawless, I slipped on a pair of black pumps and picked out a black clutch to match. If I was going to be pregnant, the least I could do was be fashionable about it. Too many people used pregnancy as an excuse to let themselves go and I refused to be anything but fabulous.
Just as I was about to leave there was an impatient, constant knocking at the door. Whoever it was would not stop so I quickly went to see who it was before the neighbors down the hall decided to complain. When I opened the door a breathless Dante sidestepped me before I had the chance to invite him inside. If I did not know better I would swear he was on something. Dante's usual even olive complexion was tinged with red, his eyes shifted all around the room as if he was expecting something or someone to jump out at him, and his voice was laced with frustration. Normally I could care less about this man, but I tried to be somewhat tolerant for Lulu's sake. "What did you do this time?"
Dante's POV
The universe had to have been working against me. I had been trying to contact Lulu all day and could not find her. When I came to the apartment this morning no one was home, I tried calling her cell and work numbers all day but she did not pick up either one. I knew that I promised her time and space but this was important; I needed to know if I was going to be a father or at least stop her from not making me a father.
When the door finally opened I was hoping it would be Lulu on the other side, but Maxie greeted me instead looking less than happy at my presence. "I need to see Lulu." I said walking past her without being invited.
Maxie spun on her heel, shutting the door loudly as if to make her irritation more obvious. "She's in the shower."
I refused to be deterred and sat on the couch where a combination of lack of sleep and nerves had me fidgeting uncontrollably. I could only imagine how unstable I appeared, especially when her arms folded, glaring at me suspiciously. "Are you on something, 'cuz you're acting crazy?"
"I just want to see Lulu!" I snapped out of building aggravation. The more I said and did, the deeper I seemed to be digging myself into a bottomless pit. Although I did not care very much about Maxie's opinions, I knew Lulu would not react well to me constantly fighting with her best friend.
Before I could say another word Lulu came from the hallway wrapped in a towel, skin still damp from her shower. "What's the yelling about?"
My eyes raked over her body trying to find some tell tale sign that could confirm or deny my mother's suspicions, but rationally I knew there was no way to find out except to ask. Still I could not take my eyes off her. As she came closer the droplets of water on her skin became visible and I became entranced by the trail they made from her neck, down her shoulders and chest, disappearing into the blue fluffy towel. Every nerve in my body ached to touch her; to feel those familiar curves and softness that I could not forget no matter how much I tried.
Finally I found my voice, trying not to sound as desperate as I felt. "Can we talk?"
She glanced at Maxie and motioned for her to give us a moment, but Maxie did not move. "I'm not going anywhere. He's acting weird and you know you're track record with men going psycho after you leave them."
I scoffed at the insinuation and glared at Maxie, but she held her ground glaring right back just as harshly. The comment made me momentarily wonder what she meant by men going psycho after Lulu left them, but that was a question for another time.
Lulu's palms rested gently against my chest and she maneuvered me out the door from Maxie's critical eyes. I lost focus once again studying the familiarity her touch brought about. It was a heat that constantly sent my head spinning and could not be any more profound if she were touching my bare skin. "Can we talk later tonight? You're coming to the party right?" She asked with her hands still on me. I doubted it was intentional but it still had an overwhelming effect, forcing me to channel all of my self control into not tugging away the towel and seeing for myself exactly where those droplets of water stopped.
"Lulu…" I started, wanting to get this over with but her fingers flexed slightly gripping my shirt. Glancing at the trivial gesture I remembered a time when we would lay around arbitrarily tracing our fingers over each other's bodies, enjoying the comfort of silence and togetherness. There was no drama or complications; things were just simpler then. Would we ever have that again? Could we ever have that again?
Finally realizing how close she was, Lulu moved her hands away quickly and took a step back. "We'll talk tonight." She promised giving a small parting smile, then disappeared into the apartment.
The party had slipped my mind, but I had no other choice but to show up if I wanted to find out what was happening. I had waited all day for answers; what were a few more hours.
Johnny's POV – Seven Deadly Sins Party
Stepping into "The Confessional" - as the four level mansion was effectually dubbed for the night - the Seven Deadly Sins Party made you feel like you had entered into a hedonistic playground of earthly vices. At the door patrons were greeted by a woman dressed in a long, white and gold, form fitting dress that made her look like a Grecian goddess. The sides of the dress were exposed from beneath her breast to the floor, with a band of gold covering just enough of her hips to allow her to wear underwear. She handed you 4''x 6'' card that looked similar to the invitation, but instead it pointed out the various forms of penance that was offered for each sin; in this case the penance was indulgence.
The ground floor was the central location which comprised of a ball room mainly used as a dance floor, along with a main bar, D.J, waiters and waitresses dressed in white and gold, serving champagne and hors d'oeuvres. Whenever you felt the need to be "repentant" for your sins, each room upstairs offered excess.
Walking up the winding staircase to the upper floors, the first stop was gluttony. The hostess appropriately dressed in orange welcomed you into a sweet lover's paradise. There were all different types and flavors of desserts: candy, pies, cakes, cookies, ice cream and even a chocolate fountain. A few minutes in this room and a person was sure to succumb to a diabetic coma. Sloth was a cozy space with soft lighting and tranquil music where 2 male and 2 female hosts, dressed in blue, offered relaxing 20 minute massages. Pride I was pretty sure was Maxie's handy work. It was set up like a Hollywood red carpet backdrop where a professional photographer would take you picture – Photoshop it at your request if there were flaws you wished to hide – then print an 8'' x 10'' portrait. The greed room was a casino where you could actually gamble and win or lose money. There was blackjack, poker, Russian roulette and two slot machines; the basics of a gambler's paradise.
The next set of stairs led to the other three rooms. Envy was like a church confessional where you could confess the things or people you desired most. There was an audio recorder set up so that every confession was taped, then sometime during the night the confessions would be played back for everyone to hear. No names or faces would be divulged, just voices. Anger was the place to take out your aggression. The walls were blood red pulsating with heart thumping music, and dartboards were set up where you could attach a name or even a picture of the person you disliked to reign darts to your amusement. You could also make a voodoo doll of the person you hated and take it to the hostess claiming to be a voodoo priestess and she would help you to put a curse on them. It was all for show of course; just for fun as a way to help someone release their wrath. The final and largest room was lust. Dimly lit with candlelight, sectional type chairs wrapped around the entire space, and black and crimson silk adorned the walls. Strategically placed shelves held bowls of feathers, lace and scarves, adding to the creativity of those who brought in deserts from the gluttony room. Seductive music seemed to be coming from everywhere fueling sexual temptation and entrancing the occupants into sensual dances and heated make out sessions.
Needless to say Maxie and Lulu had outdone themselves, and I had no doubt this party would be talked about for a while.
On my way back to the main floor, I stopped at the end of the staircase taking sight of Brook-Lynn in a knee length sparkling black dress with a neckline that dipped almost to her belly button. My eyebrows rose in surprise not only at the shock value her outfit offered, but also that she had been invited. Maxie and Lulu could not stand Brook-Lynn so I figured she would have been conveniently excluded from the guest list. Thinking of those two, I scanned the room hoping they were nowhere nearby and instead saw Dante at the entrance. He was insignificant to me at the moment since I was more concerned about the trouble that could arise from these three women in the same room. Tonight was not the time or place, but Port Charles parties were never known to go as planned.
The crowd was a dense rainbow of party-goers so it took a while before I spotted Maxie and Lulu talking near the dance floor, likely oblivious to their enemy's presence. Maybe I could keep it that way for a moment, or at least until they dispersed into the crowd. "Wow! You really went all out." I commented to Brooke looking her up and down. If I was going to get anything meaningful out of her I would have to continue being nice in hopes of building some sort of faux friendship, or at least gaining her trust.
She flipped the wave of dark curls across her shoulder and curved her blood red lips slyly. "Well, lust seems to be getting me into a lot of trouble the last few months." Then pointed to my black dress shirt and slacks. "And from the looks of it you too. We could serve our penance together; or would that just get us into even more trouble?"
Playing the game, I flashed a similar devious smile and grabbed two glasses of champagne from a passing waiter, handing her one. "Something tells me you wouldn't have a problem with trouble."
She shrugged nonchalantly and downed the champagne in one fluid motion. Next, with slow deliberate movements she placed a hand on my shoulder and leaned in so close that her lips grazed my earlobe undoubtedly leaving a stain. "Well tonight is all about sins." Her voice cooed with irrefutable want and a lingering look before sliding her hand down my arm into my palm and pulling me back upstairs with her.
Lulu's POV
If Maxie stared any harder into the back of Brooke-Lynn's head there would be permanent holes in the shape of her eyes. The moment Maxie spotted her she watched the interaction between her and Johnny with building fury. If we had our way Brooke-Lynn would have been conveniently forgotten from the guest list, but Kate insisted we put our personal feelings aside all in the name of business and professionalism. She was a Quartermaine and that alone warranted her an invite to the hottest party in town.
Brooke of course exploited any opportunity possible to get under our skins and wasted no time working to entrap Johnny into her web. She led him upstairs for God knows what, and it was shameless how this woman had no regard for who she hurt, as long as Brooke-Lynn's world was perfect. As much as I hated her, a small part of me could empathize because there was a time I was that selfish. My only hope was that no one got hurt more than we all already had been.
Maxie on the other hand was not taking Brooke's presence - plus the fact she was hanging all over Johnny - well. "Leave it alone." I warned my best friend, knowing that look could bring nothing but trouble.
"That… that… ," She huffed an aggravated breath searching for the appropriate word. "man stealer took my fiancé upstairs, and I guarantee it wasn't to one of the second floor rooms."
"You have nothing to worry about."
Maxie immediately eyed me suspiciously since it wasn't like me to be this relaxed about Brooke-Lynn. "What aren't you telling me?"
I shrugged from being just as much in the dark as she was. "I don't know the details but he's up to something with her. We're just going to have to wait to find out." Yes I hated and distrusted Brooke-Lynn with every nerve in my body but I had faith that Johnny loved Maxie more than life; so whatever he was doing had to be important if he was willing to risk her wrath.
Before I could say another word a hand rested on my lower back, and the scent of soap mixed with traces of familiar cologne loomed around me. I did not have to see Dante to realize his presence; it was just automatic – like my body was completely attuned to his aura.
"Hi ladies." His fingers slightly pressed into the fabric as he greeted Maxie with civil nod, to which she responded with a curt smile.
Now standing next to me, his hand stayed comfortably at that spot as if we were a normal, happy couple, when in reality nothing was resolved. In fact had he not shown up at the apartment so agitated needing to talk, we would probably still be estranged.
"Can we talk now?" He asked in a whisper leaning closer. "In private."
God he smells good. I realized breathing in the allure that seemed to be drawing me back to him. No matter what was happening between us, I could never deny the pull that had been there from day one.
Giving him a quick once over he looked exhausted but was still well was dressed in a deep plum colored shirt that was a welcome change from the usual earth tones and black. I found it interesting that he chose to wear something from the purple family since I never pegged him to be vain or overly proud; confident yes, almost bordering arrogant just like Sonny, but not obnoxiously proud.
"Yeah, I just need a minute."
Dante obliged, standing a few feet away while I spoke to Maxie. "Please, please, please don't do anything crazy while I'm gone." I begged, knowing she was dying to find out what Johnny was up to with Brooke-Lynn. The last time someone jumped to conclusions it ended badly for me and I did not want the same for her, especially now.
Maxie rolled her eyes in dramatically as if what I suggested was completely absurd, when in fact we both knew what jealousy could drive her to do. "You don't have to babysit me, I'll behave…. and if Dante happens to go psycho, just hit him and run 'cuz it's going to be hard to cover up a murder with all these people around."
I shoved her lightly in the arm for the reference to the secret we promised to take to our graves. "Funny." Then gave her a final warning glance before walking away. Port Charles parties' were never without incident, so it was a waiting game with trepidation to see what would unfold tonight.
Dante's POV
Lulu and I weaved through the crowd towards the door and I noticed she had refused the champagne offered by passing waiters and waitresses. It could have been a coincidence I normally would have never picked up on, but given the potential alternative it was a huge red flag. The music faded to a faint melody as we exited the mansion into the gardens. It was a picturesque sight that would have been the ideal backdrop for a storybook romantic moment: Lulu in a short sexy red dress, her hair swept up into a sleek high ponytail that under different circumstances I could imagine lightly tugging on, and the moonlight hitting her at all the right angles making it appear as if she subtly glowed. Then again that glow could have been a reason other than the moon, and I still was not sure how I would feel if it was.
Under Lulu's curious gaze - head slightly tilted to the side in that usual way whenever she was trying to figure something or someone out – I fell silent. There were so many things I wanted to say earlier, but now that the adrenaline had waned I had no idea where to start. We had not had a real conversation in a while so blurting out 'are you having my baby?' did not seem like the best way to start.
"You look great." I complemented instead, hoping to beak the tension that seemed to be swallowing us.
"Thanks." Arms folded across her chest while rocking back and forth on her heels, she waited for me to continue speaking, but I was at a loss for words. What was the correct protocol for asking your technically wife if she is carrying your child. "Dante are you ok? 'Cuz you're acting really weird. When was the last time you slept?"
She had no idea how hard a feat that was. I wished I could sleep, but every time I closed my eyes dreams of what could have been morphed into nightmares of the present. It was much easier to stay awake than face my inner most feelings. I remembered a time when the thought of children was incomprehensible, and if I were being honest it still was. Nevertheless I could not live with myself if I knowingly let Lulu destroy a part of me; at least not without a fight.
"Remember before we got married we talked about kids?" I asked, still unsure of how to work my way to the real question.
"Yeah, neither of us wanted any. That was probably the only thing we agreed on."
"It wasn't that I didn't want kids, I just didn't want us to have any."
Lulu's eyebrows rose incredulously as she took a step back. "Wow! Thanks a lot!"
When I realized how bad that must have sounded I grabbed her by both hands, pulling her closer in hopes of making her understand it was not the insult she took it to be. "No, no, no that's not what I meant. Any man would be lucky to have a child with you, you're amazing, but at the time our marriage was just on paper and it would have been wrong to bring a child into that. Things are different now though. We may not in the best place, but you have to admit this doesn't feel like it's just on paper anymore."
"You're talking in circles and I'm not sure what you're trying to say, so just spit it out." She responded impatiently.
This was not going well at all. Everything was completely jumbled in my head that it was difficult to find the right words that would explain my thoughts without sounding like a lunatic. Maybe it was better to just blurt it out instead of sugar coating which was getting me nowhere.
"Okay…" With a heavy intake of breath, I told her what I knew. "My mom said she ran into you the other day…"
A strange look that I could not discern overtook Lulu's previous impatience and her hands instantly unclasped mine, falling limp to her sides. "Oh no…"
"And you were buying a pregnancy test…"
"Oh God…" She groaned, eyes slowly closing whilst her head shook.
"Are you pregnant?"
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Lots of love till next time.
