Chapter Twenty-Eight: Give Him a Reason to Choose You

As we move into December and the semester draws to a close, the workload for all of my classes becomes so intense that I don't have time to worry about Holly or be annoyed with Jeremy or fantasize about Kurt.

I have thousands upon thousands of words to write, and any waking moment that isn't spent in class or eating is spent chained to my computer, struggling to churn out as much content as possible just to meet minimum word count requirements for my assignments. Any concern for the quality of my work is forgotten. I just have to get this shit done.

So, when Jeremy corners me in the cafeteria while I'm trying to scarf down my salad as quickly as possible so I can return to writing my rhetorical argument on paternal rights during pregnancy, following Holly's advice to confront him is far from my mind.

"How are you, Blaine?" he asks, sliding his tray of food onto the table across from me.

I look up at him wearily, and say, "Incredibly busy. What do you want, Jeremy?"

He looks hurt, in a false, theatrical sort of way. "Just wanted to talk. Haven't seen much of you lately. You're feeling better?"

I raise an eyebrow. "What?"

"I know you were hospitalized after my party in that storm."

"That was a month ago. I'm fine."

Jeremy opens his can of Red Bull. "Just wanted to make sure. I lost a brother to asthma when I was a kid. You can imagine that it still scares me."

Something about his tone when he tells me about his brother irritates me, which then makes me feel guilty. But he had no reason to bring that up right now unless he was looking for pity or trying to force some kind of connection with me.

"I'm sorry about your brother," I say, "But I'm fine."

Jeremy nods. "Yeah, I can see that."

His tone shifts to flirty in an instant, and it takes all of my strength not to walk away. But instead, I ask, "Has Kurt said anything to you about teaming up for the Collab Festival?"

Jeremy shrugs. "Probably. You're doing it?"

I nod. "I dunno. I think so."

He says, "Kurt's been weird lately. He told you anything? Like, about us? Like, about maybe wanting to break up with me? Because I just… I just get the feeling that he's about to end it."

He has this boyish, vulnerable look about him, like he's really worried about the boy he treats like crap not wanting to be with him.

Still, I'm not going to beat around the bush about it when my own happiness is on the line. Jeremy never lets anyone else' happiness get in the way of his, so I'll follow his lead.

I say, "You're not the only one who fools around on the side, Jeremy. The difference is that Kurt feels guilty about it."

Jeremy freezes. His jaw drops open, but he corrects it instantly, straitening up and adjusting his collar, eyes flicking in every direction as though his brain is short-circuiting.

"You fucked my boyfriend, Anderson?"

Now his tone is threatening and dangerous.

I'm not afraid of him. I say, "That's between me and Kurt."

"Since when is there a You And Kurt?" The pitch of his voice is heightening.

I roll my eyes. "If you actually deserved a guy like Kurt, you'd have noticed a long time ago that you're not his whole world."

"Of course I'm his whole world. Who the fuck do you think you are? You don't know a thing about me and Kurt."

I say, "I know that everyone who knows you can see that you're both holding onto something that isn't there. You make him miserable, Jeremy. Kurt doesn't deserve to have a boyfriend who makes him feel worthless."

"What, and I guess you think that you're the guy he deserves?" Jeremy has gone very very pale.

"I think that you need to ask yourself why you're keeping yourselves prisoner in a relationship that clearly means more to you in theory than it does in practice."

He doesn't say anything; he just pokes at his dinner with his fork and stares at me.

"I just want you to know that you're not the only guy in Kurt's world. So open your eyes and either give him a reason to choose you, or let him go. Because I'm not just going to watch you hurt him for very much longer."

Jeremy drops his fork. "Fuck you, Blaine," he says, picking up his tray and getting to my feet, "You don't get to talk to me like that. You don't know me. Stay the hell away from my boyfriend."

He leaves, and I try not to feel so dizzy.