Hey guys! Sorry this took so long! I went away for the weekend and ever since I've bogged down with homework, but I just had to get this out here. So here you go! Enjoy! Thanks for reading! Please Review!
-Leah by Michelangelo
Ch. 28-Father Understands
I was in the dojo meditating, in a deep and peaceful trance, when the air current changed for a brief moment, making my ear twitch. I closed my eyes tighter as my face drew upward into a frown of displeasure. The current returned to normal, but the atmosphere did not. The moment was gone, and I knew it was because I was no longer alone in the room. I took a deep breath before slowly opening my eyes, expecting to see my eldest son across from me asking for guidance. Imagine my surprise as I gradually registered the stocky, muscular frame of my second child, Raphael. My eyes widened a bit, before returning to normal, accepting the fact that Raphael was here and probably had not come without a reason.
His fetching green eyes stared blankly at me, as though he was contemplating what he was about to say. Raphael was still standing, so I gestured for him to take a seat across from me. My son obliged with a brief nod and then the contemplative stare was back. I closed my eyes and decided to continue with my meditation. Raphael will always tell me when he's ready. Besides, pushing him will only lead to bigger problems.
If I had been surprised by my son's intrusion on my meditation, I was flabbergasted by what happened next. I heard a slight movement and cracked open my eyes. My jaw dropped. Raphael had crossed his legs, closed his eyes and began to meditate. I opened my eyes all the way and gave him a careful once-over, as though I didn't completely believe that my second son was sitting in the dojo meditating with me. Honestly, he was the last of my four sons that I would ever have expected to join me in meditation.
I stood silently and Raphael, whose eyes remained closed, took no notice. He had a look of absolute concentration on his face that I had only seen once or twice before. There was a glimmer of triumph and distinction in his posture as he sat with a straight back and relaxed shoulders. I had to admit I was impressed. Perhaps I should begin the second phase of his training…No; Raphael came in here for a reason. I must wait patiently. Though it certainly isn't a bad idea. I walked around him in a circle before returning to my place on the tatami mat across from him.
Raphael's breath slowed as he took a deep breath and blew it out unhurriedly. I stared at him in quiet contemplation, wondering whether or not I should question him.
"Raphael." I said quietly. My son's bright green eyes snapped open, their intense stare making me come up short, unable to continue. But it would seem as though I didn't need to say anything more than that, Raphael's eyes told me what he was expecting, so I changed tactics. "What are you doing in here? You know that it is time for my daily meditation." I stated, my tone slightly reprimanding.
I had come into the dojo intending to ask my father a very important question. A question only he would know the answer to. So here I was. Sitting on the floor meditating. Yeah, that's right. Meditating. I can't believe I'm doing this. But after I got inside the question just…died on the tip of my tongue, I guess. I just can't bring myself to ask it. But I really need to know the answer! Ugh! What am I supposed to do?! Well first things first I need to—
"Raphael."
My eyes flicked open rather suddenly and Sensei was momentarily stunned by my intense gaze. We stared at each other for brief moment before he spoke again.
"What are you doing in here? You know it is time for my daily meditation." He chided harshly and I flinched.
I lowered my head slightly, shifting into a kneeling position, as though preparing for punishment. "Look, I'm sorry, okay? I just wanted to—aw forget it!" I jumped to my feet, throwing my hands up in frustration.
I watched as the look of concentration on my son's face quickly melted away, replaced by one of anger, confusion and exhaustion. Raphael threw up his hands and turned to leave, but I reached out grabbing his shoulder. "What is it that you wanted my son?" I said slowly as he sighed, his muscular emerald green shoulders drooping dejectedly for a moment before he turned around slowly. The red-banded turtle glanced down, nervously before neon green eyes moved upwards to stare into mine.
"Father, I—" He closed his eyes. My eyes widened, but only slightly. Ever since their training intensified when they turned thirteen my sons have hardly ever called me father, except on rare occasions. Now that I think about it, it's been quite some time since my second child has called me anything other than Sensei or Master Splinter.
But those are thoughts for another time. I returned my focus to Raphael who was still stumbling with his words. "Raphael." I said sternly and he immediately straightened.
I glanced nervously at my father as his eyes narrowed. Gulp. I probably should have waited until after he was done meditating. "I wanted to ask you…"
"Yes?"
I rubbed the back of my neck nervously. "I was…I was kinda in the mood for a story."
I stared at Raphael for a moment. There must be a reason behind this request. "Indeed? Is there any particular story that you had in mind?" I questioned softly, staring deep into his eyes. He was silent for a few more moments, once again in contemplation, his bottom lip protruding slightly the way it always has whenever he is thinking very hard about something.
"Um…How did you tell Tang Shen, ya know, how you felt about her?"
I raised an eyebrow and gripped his shoulders tightly, staring down into my son's face. So that is why… My eyes narrowed. I removed my right hand from his shoulder, using it to tilt his head up so that he was looking me directly in the eyes. "My son, you are still young. As is Mona Lisa. Do not rush things. A confession of love is one of the most intimate and special in a lifetime. You are very fond of her, aren't you?"
I stared up at him and I knew that I could tell Sensei, Father, anything. I was nervous at first, until I saw the care in my rat master's eyes. Right now he wasn't being the hard, strict sensei, right here, right now he was my father. Father will understand. Father always has.
Father had always understood me, and I could tell by the look in his eyes that he's already figured out what this is all about.
He grips my shoulder with his left paw and lifts my head with the other. He looked deep into my eyes as he spoke. "My son, you are still young. As is Mona Lisa. Do not rush things. A confession of love is one of the most intimate and special in a lifetime. You are very fond of her, aren't you?"
"Yes father." I answered.
"I assume you would go to any lengths to keep her safe?"
"I would die for her." I stated automatically, my eyes widening as I realized what I'd said. But it was the truth. I would willingly give my life rather than see her get hurt. My father nodded and pulled his hand off my shoulder. Master Splinter's eyes lowered as he stroked his beard, turning away from me for a moment.
"Be careful, my son." He said, his voice hushed, "Love can be fatal if it falls into the wrong hands."
"Sensei, Mona Lisa would never—"
"I was not speaking of Mona Lisa, my child." Splinter turned back to me and put his hand back on my shoulder. "There are those who would use your love against you. If you truly love her you will not allow that love to blind you, or it will only be that much easier for her to be taken from you by the Shredder, or the Krang, or any of our other various enemies. Treasure the love that you two share my son, but in this world, you cannot afford to allow it to control your actions."
I stared into my father's knowledgeable eyes. "I understand Sensei."
"Good." He pulled away slightly. "There is nothing worse than losing a loved one my son."
I nodded with grave sympathy and understanding. I'd been through enough close calls with my brothers that I've experienced the fear, the pain that loss would bring. Losing Mona the way Sensei lost Tang Shen…I don't think I'd be able to survive it. I loved her…having her taken from me…I know for a fact that I'd no longer be able to control my anger. It would consume me and I have no doubt that I wouldn't be able to stop myself from killing those responsible. "How did you survive it?" I asked.
I gave my son a sad smile. "I realized that Tang Shen would have wanted me to care for you as though you were our own, so that is precisely what I did, Raphael. The four of you kept me going, you made me eager to see what each day would bring, the four of you mended the tears in my heart and held it together." I pulled Raphael into a short hug before releasing him, knowing that he dislikes long bouts of physical contact. "In answer to your question, my son. I told Tang Shen I loved her on a beautiful spring morning, when the cherry trees were in bloom and their bright pink flowers bought peaceful beauty to the mountainsides. I was very nervous, but eventually I managed to tell her exactly what I meant. She reciprocated and the two of us were very happy. But you must come up with your own way of telling her, Raphael."
"Hai, Sensei. Thank you very much, Father."
I nodded and grinned when I saw my son's face as he began brainstorming ideas. The red-banded turtle walked slowly out of the dojo. I watched him go before I returned to my cross-legged position on the floor, ready to continue with my meditation. I only hope I have done the right thing for my son.
