Stretching my arms above my head, I let out a long yawn. I'm tired, so tired, however I probably slept better last night than I have in months. Rolling my head back until I hear a pop, I twist onto my side and feel the warm body beside me. In the least creepiest way I can say this, I like watching her sleep.

It's weird, I know. Honestly, creeps me out if anyone else says it but it's true.

She just looks so at peace while she sleeps. Plus she is quiet which I like, she talks so much. I want to say it gets on my nerves all her talking, but honestly it doesn't. I may roll my eyes at her, mumble at her to shut up but honestly it doesn't bother me at all, but again I will never admit that to anyone.

Sliding my hand down her side, I enjoy the grin that appears on her face. Even asleep my touch still affects her. Sliding up her t-shirt, I watch the goose bumps rise under my palm of her smooth skin. Slowly easing her to her back so she doesn't wake, I tug the shirt up just a sliver more and take the tip of my tongue and trail it up her stomach, feeling her body flutter as my tongue traces around her belly button.

"Mmm…" I peer my eyes up to see her shift along the bed, her eyes still closed and her bottom lip sucking between her teeth.

Sliding her shirt up, just a bit more, my teeth nip at the smooth skin as I move up her body. Leaving a few short kisses up her body, between her breast and along her neck, kissing this one spot behind her ear that makes her body react.

"Lucas…" her voice has a little extra rasp as her left leg bends upward and I drop my body to rest comfortable on her. "Mmm…" she pants, taking her small hand and running her fingers through my hair, gripping just a bit making me growl. "That feels good," she giggles a bit and my lips slip into a smile as I pull back.

"How can you make something like foreplay innocent?" I cork a brow and she giggles again. "Seriously," I nuzzle my face in the nape of her neck. "That damn giggle of yours…like a child," I tease and she lets out a big pout.

"I'm not a child," her arms cross over her chest and I roll my eyes.

"No, you are-"

"Nor…" her small finger flies to my lips to silence me. "Cute. So if that's what you're about to say, I swear I will knee you in the crotch."

"You're so cute," I tease, her not having a moment to react and I trap her finger in my mouth.

"Lucas…" she whines, tugging it but I just tighten my teeth around it, not enough to hurt her but enough for it not to let go. "Give me back my finger…" her bottom lip pokes out and I laugh.

"Fine," I playfully roll my eyes at her and her finger comes from my mouth and my head drops to rest against hers. Stroking my fingers across her smoothness of cheek, staring down at those gorgeous eyes as they look back up at me, holding something as they look at me that honestly scares me a bit. "You're so beautiful…" I whisper and a blush sweeps across her cheeks.

"No I'm not, stop that…" her hand covers her face, I know embarrassed by that stuff.

"No," I take her hand and brush a kiss against her palm. "You are," I mummer along her smooth hand.

"Why are you nervous?" my brows crease as I look down at her. "I feel it," she reaches and places her hand on my chest, my whole body trembling. "You're nervous," she leans forward and runs her lips up my neck, my eyes fluttering shut. "Don't be nervous, it's just me…" she whispers in my ear, dragging her teeth down my neck, making a chill race through me.

"I'm not nervous," I grumble and she lets out a giggle. "Why would I be nervous?"

"I don't know," she drops her head back on her pillow and looks up at me. "You tell me," she runs her fingers through the front of my hair and I frown a bit.

"What…what are you doing before school?" I question, knowing the events aren't something I really want to do.

"I don't know," she glances over at her clock, its blinking just after six. "I normally sleep until the very last moment and then take a quick shower and head to school," she explains her normal routine and I just nod. "But…if there is something you want to do, I can do whatever. I can miss school if you want."

"No…" I shake my head a bit. "No, I don't want to miss school…I just…I want to take you somewhere," I tell her, really not wanting to wait until after school to do it. I kind of just want to do it now, as fast as I can, get her reaction and then figure things out from there.

"Then take me," a look of peace is over her as she stretches her arms above her head. "I'll go wherever."

"Ok…lets…let's get dressed and then we can go, I guess," I shrug, rolling off her and grabbing my clothes and pulling them on.

"Ok," I feel her watch me as I dress, her pausing moment on the bed, before rolling off the bed. "How often do I get to do this?" I tease, dropping down in a chair, her moving around searching for clothes.

"Do what?" she tosses a glance over her shoulder before digging into her closet.

"Watch you change," I explain, tilting my head to the side when she pushes up on her toes, reaching for something. Her tight shorts making her backside look amazing. "Because I could enjoy this," I mumble out, licking my lips as the fire builds in me.

"Down boy," she smirks and I let out a chuckle.

"Tease…" I grumble, when she bends over just a little extra for me to pull on her skirt. Grabbing some white long sleeve shirt and tugging it over her head. Her putting one some light makeup, spraying herself with some of the perfume that smells so damn good and runs a brush through her hair.

"Do I look ok?" she does a little spin for me and I grin.

"You know you always look good," I inform her and watch the cute blush sweep across her cheeks. "Come here," I reach for her hand and she slowly sways her way towards me with a grin. Tugging her up into my lap, I tilt my head up and trap her chin between my thumb and finger, giving her a sweet kiss. Sliding my arms around her tiny waist, I crush her body against mine as her soft hands frame over my face. Nipping her bottom lip, making her growl, her fingers digging into my hair as those smooth lips part. I don't know what it is, but every time I have my hands on this girl, a kiss doesn't seem enough. My body just wants her all the time and when I get a little taste, I seriously almost can't control myself…

I think I have a problem.

"What?" her brows scrunch when I start to laugh, laugh at my own thought.

I'm stupid.

"Why are you laughing?"

"Nothing," I shake my head, brushing her hair back from her eyes. "Let's head out…" I stand with her in my arms and she squeals.

"Lucas…put me down!"

"Nope…" I shrug, bending to the side to grab my book bag. "I like having you all wrapped around me," I smirk and she rolls her eyes at me.

"You're stupid, but really…you can't go out the front door, my dad will murder you," she informs me, her parents not really aware of me sleeping over. "And if he doesn't murder you, he will definitely chop off certain parts of you," she jokes and our eyes travel downward. "And I want to play with it at least one more time before that happens…" she teases and my eyes narrow on her.

"You aren't funny…"

"I'm kinda funny," she giggles, that innocent giggle and a smile appears on my face.

"Yeah kinda," I agree, leaning in for a kiss. "Hurry downstairs," I let her slide down my body to stand on her own, her hand in mine.

"Ok…" she promises, giving me a wink before I walk over and slip out the window. Climbing down the balcony and down the small wooden flower thing, I don't know the name of and jump down. It's still dark out, there is a light breeze and I know Brooke is going to complain about being cold and as much as I love those little skirts she wears, in about five minutes she will be freezing and regretting it.

But seeing her legs in it will make me happy.

Moving around the corner to my car, I climb in and crank it as I wait for her. Glancing up to see her with her arms wrapped around herself and moving quickly to my car.

"It's freezing!" she announces as soon as she climbs in and I laugh. Told you.

"It's not that bad," I shake my head, reaching behind her seat for my jacket.

"Aw, thank you baby," she grins big when I drop my lettermen jacket over her legs. "Aren't you just the sweetest," she has a little mocking in her tone as she leans over to kiss my cheek.

"Yeah, don't tell anyone. Can't have that shit getting out," I joke, putting my car in reverse and pulling back from the curb.

"Oh I won't tell a soul," she promises; my hand dropping under my jacket to her leg and she laces her fingers through mine.


The ride is pretty quiet, I haven't asked where we are going or what we are doing but I can tell Lucas is nervous. His thumb keeps absentmindedly tapping against my leg where it rest. He is fidgeting a little, shifting in his chair, chewing on his lip, occasionally playing with the radio, but his eyes stay focused on the road. Him weaving in and out of lanes without a second thought, him moving along the road like he knows it better than he knows anything.

The look on his face makes me worry, it's so unreadable and I hate it. For some reason I have this alarming want to protect this boy, protect him in a way I've never wanted to protect anyone like I do him and I'm afraid today, I can't. I'm not sure what is going on, or what is going to happen but I do know, I don't think I can protect him from it.

"Lucas…" I look over at the building her turns into and then back at him. Him not even looking at me as he kills the engine opens his door and climbs out and I slowly slip my arms through his jacket as he appears opening my door. "Luke, what are we doing?" I ask as he closes my door.

"Come on," he nods his head and I slowly follow as he walks a few steps ahead of me. Him stepping through the sliding glass doors and again I just follow into the bland white area, the air of the building feeling so cold as I stand there. Walking over to where he stands, him giving a smile at the young girl behind the counter and signing some clip board.

I don't know why it bothers me, because it's so selfish that in a moment like this, at this place I feel it but when I see the way the dark haired girl behind the counter looks at him, I feel that familiar feeling bubble up in me. When I was with Jack girls used to be like that, blatantly gawk at him, hit on him and flirt with him and to this day, I'm still not positive on how many times he cashed in on those advances. I know it's stupid, but it doesn't change even with Lucas, that feeling builds in me.

Walking over, and sliding my hand down his arm, he tosses a glance at me, before looking back down at the clipboard, my cheek resting against the side of his arm as I lace our fingers together, and give the girl a half forced smile, her returning an awkward one before looking down at her computer.

"Lucas…" his head snaps up to see a heavier set woman moving down the hall towards him.

"Wylee," a glimpse of a smile appears on his face as he moves towards her, his hand still in mine, pulling me with him. Him giving her a small hug with his free hand, and I stand shyly behind him.

"Sweetie, why are you limping?" she pulls back to look at him. "Are you ok?"

"I hurt my knee last Friday," he explains and I frown at the fact I didn't stay to know that. I could have taken care of him, if I wasn't such a coward and ran.

"Lucas…" she shakes her head. "Have you gotten it checked out?"

"It's ok," he gives a tight lipped smile and her eyes drop on the corners. "Don't give me that look, I promise. I'm ok…"

"Well I don't believe you, but I know you're just as stubborn as your father, so I won't argue," she holds her hands up and shakes her head. Him tensing a little at the mention of his father and I truly wonder what his father is all about. I haven't met the man, but from what I hear, he isn't all that great. "And who is this?" she looks around Lucas, and I shuffle my feet, hiding myself in his shoulder.

"This is my friend Brooke," he introduces and I feel the ping in my chest by how he said friend. "Brooke, this is Wylee."

"Nice to meet you," I outstretch my hand which she takes, cutting her eyes over at Lucas before looking back at me.

"Nice to meet you too," she smiles, her eyes drifting over me, taking me in and I feel a little nervous.

"Wylee's known me since I was little," Lucas explains. "My mom and her went to nursing school together."

"Oh honey we were friend's long before nursing school," she waves her hand. "We went to high school together and I've seen this one grow up. The stories I could tell you," she whispers to me and I truly love when Lucas's ears turn a little red.

"I might have to hear a few of those," I tease, rocking myself into Lucas and he rolls his eyes at me.

"You might not," Lucas informs me, his first words to me since we left my house. "But Wylee… I… I was wondering… I mean I know visiting hours haven't started yet, but I just…"

"I can get you in," she gives him a sad smile and he returns it. "Come on sweetie…" she nods her head and we follow, Lucas's hand trembling as I take it.

Following them both, through a few doors, down a couple halls and up one elevator ride we arrive at a room. A room on a less crowded hall and a room with the label Karen Scott on the outside and my stomach drops.

I don't know if I want to be here anymore. I don't know if I can handle this, handle what is happening and handle being here. I'm not good at these things.

Opening the heavy door, it slowly glides open to reveal the large dark room, the beeping noise sounding so loud as we walk in. Wylee walking over and opening the blinds, checking something on the beeping machine and smiling down at the pale woman with hair that looks just like Lily's.

"I'll be right out here if you need me," Wylee gives a gentle smile before leaving us alone. The heavy door shutting and I take in everything, with the light from outside I look around the room and see a desk in the corner with a laptop on it, papers scattered all around, a pull out sofa with a bed made and a suitcase in the corner, pictures everywhere along with flowers and balloons.

I watch Lucas as he walks closer to the bed, sliding down on a chair beside it and watching her, watching her with such…pain in his eyes it crushes me.

"Lily looks just like her," he says so quietly, I barely hear him.

"You…you look like her," I whisper, kind of nervous of what I am supposed to say to him.

"You think?" his eyes look at her more carefully and I slowly nod.

"Her high cheek bones, her full lashes...ya'll have the same nose," I point out things I can just see from this side of the room, Lucas looking at her as if it was the first time he's ever seen her. "You have her eyes," I look at a photo on the stand, it of Lily and her.

"I've gotten that one a lot," he tells me and I slowly nod.

"What…what's wrong with her?" I ask carefully, walking over and easing myself on the other side of her.

"She's here, but not here," he tells me slowly. "That's…that's what the doctor's told me. Physically she is still alive but brain wise…" he trails off and I turn my gaze to him, seeing the pain wash over him.

"Do you visit her a lot?" I ask and he starts to quickly shake his head, running his nose along his sleeve.

"I used to…but after a while just stopped. I've accepted she is gone, it was hard but I get she isn't coming back," he explains, his eyes squinting a bit as he looks at her. "My dad can't accept it though," he tells me. "He stays here most days, only really comes home when he needs to wash his clothes."

"He…he like lives here?" I glance around, the room suddenly making a lot more sense.

"He doesn't want to leave her alone, he doesn't believe there is nothing they can do," he sniffles a bit and I watch him swallow the large lump in his throat. "But she isn't coming back," he reaches up to brush her hair back, revealing a really nasty scar along her face.

"I'm sorry Lucas," I whisper real low, not really sure what to say in this moment. I've never been good at these things, in a time of lose and pain, I just let Clay or my mom handle it, I never say the right things, act the right way. I go into some awkward moment and just…just suck.

"I always drive too fast," he randomly states, his eyes still locked on his mom. "I don't know why but I just…I do…" he pauses and I just stay silent. "One day my mom wanted me to go shopping with her for dad's birthday and with Lily on her hip and a smile plastered on her face she spent hours in that damn mall shopping for the best gift. I of course bitched and moaned the whole time because I hate the mall…but she was so happy…"

"Lucas…" I reach to touch his hand when he gets distant look in his eyes.

"By the time we left the mall it was getting darker out and mom asked me to drive because she always had trouble seeing at night," he tells me and I see the liquid wash in his eyes. "I don't remember much… but I remember that my light was green and I just… I never saw the other car coming…" he lets out a dry laugh, reaching up and scratching his eye, I know trying to stop from getting upset. "The other driver had been drinking…" he informs me and suddenly him not drinking makes more sense. Why everyone seemed so shocked when he did. "So it…it wasn't my fault… but a lot of people swear it is…"

"No…" I shake my head, moving from my side and over towards him. "Lucas no it's not…" I drop down on the edge of the bed beside his chair, taking his broken face in my hands. "Lucas, your mom would not want you to at all think that…"

"I was speeding, Brooke, even…even if that guy ran a red light, I was going fast, if I was going slower maybe…"

"Maybe nothing," I cut that thought out quickly. "You can't forever play the maybe game Lucas… Play what if? I mean…what if ya'll found out what you wanted sooner, what if you stayed in the mall a second longer or left an hour earlier. You can come up with a million what ifs Lucas…it won't change anything…"

"He loves her, he loves her more than he loves anything in this world and he blames me for her not being here anymore. He reminds me every day that I took her from him and he hates me."

"He doesn't hate you," I whisper to him and his eyes drop down. "His hearts just broken…" I give a slight shrug. "We all do and say things we don't mean when our heart is broken. We are in pain, such a great deal of pain and we just…we want someone else to feel it with us. This…" I wave my hand around the room, at all his dad's stuff. "Is him not accepting it and healing… He is so scared to admit she is gone, that he is jealous you are slowly starting to heal."

"I just wish she would wake up," he looks back over at her. "Because he is my dad…" his voice cracks a bit and it just kills me how much he is hurting. "And I just… I want him happy again. Even with us never really getting along she just…she had this way of dealing with him, and when she was around his mood was just better."

"He will be ok Lucas," I give his hand a squeeze. "We all have our own way of dealing with things. But I do know your mom would not want you to sit around not living your life and she sure as hell wouldn't want you to sit around blaming yourself…that alone would crush her."

"I…I'm sorry for all the shit I've put you through…" he whispers to me, and I drop my gaze down. "I just…I don't want to ever become like him, I don't want to care so much about someone that when I lose them, I become almost robotic to life."

"Why would you assume you're just going to lose me?"

"Because life is unpredictable," he states and I nod agreeing. "I've done one hell of a job not letting people in, Brooke, and it truly scares the hell out of me how much I've been letting you in."

"Oh Lucas," I shake my head with a slight laugh, latching my hand on the back of his neck and bringing his head to rest against mine. "You're so screwed up," I admit, opening my eyes to look up into his. "About half as screwed up as me…" I whisper and he lets out a small laugh. "And I think that's why I'm so crazy about you...I promise you I won't let you turn out like him," I run my hand through his hair and he slowly nods, him being so vulnerable right now, I wonder how I really accomplished it. "But you can't keep up all these walls; you can't keep people locked out because you might miss out on something really great…"

"I know…" he whispers and I know he hates being so hard to trust people. I'm the same way, I don't really trust anyone and swear that only are after one thing or going to hurt me, it's a terrible way to be.

"And just because you know she isn't coming back, doesn't mean you don't have to visit her. She may not know you are here but you do… I know it's hard but anytime you want to come… you tell me and I'm there," I promise and he slowly nods.

"Thanks…" he knocks a curl back, sliding my hand in his and bringing it up to brush across his lips. "But I guess…I guess we better get to school…"

"We can be late," I lean back in my chair, glancing at his mom. "Tell me about her…"


Moving my way down the hall, I have the biggest grin in the history of grins. I honestly feel stupid, no one smiles this much, no one should smile this much. Yet I am. Every time I think of Lucas I grin, because he's mine. I don't know how it happened, I don't know when everything started forming for us but it has. Maybe it was all those moments together, him being so gentle and kind to me, him being so protective and caring. Maybe it was our first time together, or maybe…maybe I'm just fouling myself and the moment that boy kissed me I knew.

I was just too damn scared to admit it.

Yet with everything we've been through I think it might be better. I wasn't just a girl on his list, I was his friend. He opened up to me, he let me in, or as he put it I weaseled my way in, but it doesn't matter, I got there.

And I'm happy. So damn happy, even if we have a lot of work to do.

"But I'm still happy," I grin, looking at a picture I had sent off to Lindsey and smile. "And my boy is gorgeous…" I bite my bottom lip.

"Brooke," a body slides beside me and I glance up at some guy I recognize from lunch. He's that football player I can never remember the name up.

"What?" I shut my phone, and go to dig around in my locker for nothing in particular, just not wanting to give this guy attention. Ever since the rumors, which I guess aren't rumors came out about Lucas and I it's been like this. It's like they all just assume I offer to everyone, which I don't. Stupid high school.

"So what's up?" he takes a step closer, making my breath hitch but not in a good way.

"Just at my locker," I grab a book and flip through it. "Getting stuff before class."

"That's cool," he takes his finger and runs it down my arm. "What are you doing after school?" and my head drops annoyed.

"Look I don't know what you heard but-" a heavy arm drops over my shoulder and I freeze.

"Standing a little close don't you think?" Lucas's voice rings through my ears and I'm suddenly completely relaxed.

"Hey man what's up?" no name guy takes a step back with an innocent grin.

"Not much just about to walk my girl to class," he shrugs and I grin, taking my hand and lacing my fingers through the hand that rest on my shoulder. "What's up with you?"

"Nothing, just talking," he shrugs. "But I have class to get too, nice talking to you both," he gives an unsure smile before turning on his feet and walking away.

"He bothering you?" Lucas nods his head down the hall and I shake my head.

"No," I shut my locker. "People don't seem to bother the girl with Lucas Scott," I smirk up at him and he chuckles.

"Come on," he rolls his head back and steering me down the hall. "You have class."

"That I do," I agree as we start heading down the hall. "So Mr. Scott…"

"So Miss Davis," he mocks and I roll my eyes.

"How…" I fiddle with my fingers, looking down.

"How what?" he stops us to face me.

"How do you feel about…you know relationship stuff?" I mumble and his brows creases.

"Relationship stuff?" he speaks slowly and my eyes dart to the ground, not wanting to slightly freak him out and rush him. I know he is a little new to this stuff.

"Yeah, you know…like hugging and hand holding…" I sway a little bit as I start to grin, "…kissing…"

"Well…" his posture straightens and throat clears. "I don't really like people in my business…"

"I know that…" I tell him quickly, placing my hands on his shoulders and push up on my toes. "But I'm a kisser…"

"You are, huh?"

"Yup…" I tell him with a grin. "I kiss when I say goodbye and hello and you know randomly in conversation," I inform him with a giggle. "I'm a full blown hand holding, pet name giving, watching movies on a Friday night type of girlfriend…"

"Well…" his hands skim down my side and rest on my hips. "How about we take a slow progress?"

"Baby steps…."

"Yeah…" he whispers, brushing my hair back. "Baby steps…that works…"

"What about behind closed doors? We having baby steps there?" I kink my brow and just love the look that flashes across his face.

"Oh hell no…" he growls and I giggle. "And being as we are late…" he glances up at the clock, the time showing just ten minutes left of second period. "We should get behind a closed door…."

"Lucas…" I giggle, when he grabs my hand and tugs me into the nearby closet, the regular closet he seems to enjoy so much and slams his mouth into mine.


Hello my loves!

So I want to thank you all for the reviews…I was going to write for my other stories today but got side tracked and hung out with my baby brother…we went to a movie and got lunch. Then tonight got ice cream with mommy and hung out with my boys (You know the 'Tony' 'Jason' 'Nash') and it was so much fun. But I felt guilty and since I had this chapter written forever ago figured I'd reward you all with a new one!

So I hope you enjoyed!

Also! Some of you readers who read 'My Diary' and 'Just Say You Love Me' have asked if my family is how the story goes…and yes…yes it is. I wish I could put into the story half the stuff that happens with us because it's always a blast! However you all also wanted to know how to picture each other them and though I picture other people I made a video. It was actually because I was playing with my computer and new programs and made this little youtube video which isn't great but was kinda fun.

Seriously made the thing in like less than an hour.

But you all should check it out! The link is

http:/www (dot )youtube (dot) com/watch?v=WfwfGEr4vw4&feature=g-upl&context=G25200cbAUAAAAAAAAAA

Just where it says (dot) obviously put a real . haha. But please check it out!

And!

Review!