CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
Lise-Marie looked at Sheldon as he droned on about the logistics of the following Monday's nuptial ceremony and other business related to their research. She wondered if he ever turned it off. As if he had read her mind, she got her answer: she noticed his eyes drifting to areas of her body where they ought not.
Not that she had a problem with that.
"Sheldon," she interrupted. He looked up at her eyes. "Surely you think a break would be in order."
"A break?" he asked hesitantly. "I hardly need a break from this work. It's the most important thing to me. It's what I live for."
"Well then, surely you can at least give your wine another chance," she said. "You've hardly touched it."
Sheldon looked down at the glass that was taunting him again.
"It is a delectable wine imported from Europe," she said.
"Switzerland?" he asked.
"Of course not," she said. "Switzerland is not known for its vintners. This one is from France. My father gave it to me for my birthday."
"Then I would hate to partake from a gift that was meant for you."
"Ridiculous," she said in that accent that was so fetching. She drew closer, taking a seat next to Sheldon. "Nothing would give me greater pleasure than to share it with… someone I admire so much." She lifted the glass from the table and then brought it to Sheldon, inches from his face. Eyes heavy, and not immune to her carefully chosen perfume, he turned to her before taking the glass from her hand and having a sip.
"That is… delectable," he said, breathless and weak.
"Have more," she urged, staring at his lips. He did so. Taking the glass from his trembling hand, she also took a sip before "accidentally" spilling some down her blouse. Some of the droplets rather gracefully puddled in her plunging décolletage. "Clumsy me," she purred, before taking one finger, swiping up a drop and licking it from her finger. She dabbed at another droplet and brought her wine-soaked finger to Sheldon's mouth. Tossing aside the germophobia that usually gripped him, he brought his lips around the tip of her manicured digit.
Then, she replaced her finger with her mouth. After just the slightest hesitation, Sheldon pressed against her, and they fell into feverish kisses.
"Mommy," he said.
"Mommy?" Lise-Marie repeated.
"Huh?" Sheldon replied.
"You're scaring me, Mommy," Lise-Marie said.
Then Sheldon grabbed her, shaking her.
Amy sat straight up. It took her a moment to register her surroundings, and then she realized that she was at home, in bed. There were four eyes staring at her, and they all were stunned.
"Did you have a nightmare?" Aditi asked.
Amy supposed she had. She was profoundly relieved, and a little embarrassed.
"I think I must have," she answered, breathlessly. "Did I scream?"
Robert nodded. "But that's okay. I'm used to saving people from nightmares. DeeDee has them all the time, but I'm brave."
Amy couldn't help but laugh, and then reached out for her daughter and then her son, cradling them in her arms.
"I'm fine," she assured them after a moment. "Don't worry."
"Do you need us to sleep with you?" Aditi asked. "That will make it better. I promise."
Amy looked at the empty spot next to her, then back at the twins.
"I would like that," she said. With characteristic glee, they leaped into the bed and wasted no time in making themselves comfortable. Staring at the loves of her life, Amy snuggled in too, and tried to go to sleep.
Sheldon had still not quite made it clear why he had stopped by. Lise-Marie had a nagging suspicion it had to do with her and Amy's acrimonious conversation from earlier in the evening. After she had offered him a seat and glass of scotch (the latter of which he adamantly rejected for a glass of water), she went to the restroom. When she returned, he was sitting there, looking through a folder on the table.
"The vows," she said.
Sheldon looked up, as if he'd been caught. He cleared his throat. She walked over to her bar and poured herself some of the scotch. If she waited on having company, she may never drink it.
"I said words very similar to those to a man once. In French, of course."
"You're married?" Sheldon asked.
She shook her head. "Divorced."
"Why did you get divorced?" Sheldon asked.
"I did not love him. I was a young girl and immature. I saw my wedding as a grand party, and it was. The marriage, however, was foolish."
Sheldon found that notion absurd. "Your father was not upset?"
"He advised me against the union. But I did not listen." She grinned to herself, a bit sadly, and took the folder from his hands. "I am afraid my second marriage will carry more purpose than the first, even if it is not real. I would much rather say these words to you."
Sheldon didn't respond immediately, and there was a long pause. She took a seat next to him on the couch and saw him stiffen in the corner of her eye. When she looked up, Sheldon was looking at her gravely, if not through her.
"Are you in love with me?" he asked.
She snickered to herself, and then took a sip from her scotch. "Would you like me to be?"
Sheldon thought about Penny and Leonard and Amy. "I want you to tell me the truth."
She sighed, and placed her scotch on the table. "The truth is I need this marriage as much as you do."
Sheldon didn't understand. "Why? You can travel freely between the two countries."
"I know, but…" She paused. "Can I tell you something?"
His shoulders dropped. "If you must."
"I was not the one in my family who was supposed to be a physicist. It was my sister. She excelled in the sciences. But she met her untimely death in grad school, in a freak skiing accident. I was 16 at the time, and was devastated by her death, but I just remember... something broke in my father. Even after he stopped crying openly, his grief never ended. There was a perpetual gloom in our home. I think that may be why I got married so soon after graduating. However, my marriage failed within six months and a divorce decree was issued two months later. I moved back to my father's home. His sadness had only deepened in my short absence. It was then that I promised him that I would be the scientist my sister couldn't be, and I enrolled in school. He was comforted, somehow. Slowly I saw the light return to his eye. It was like my sister was living in me. Through me."
She stopped there, a sadness settling over her. She looked at Sheldon. He was unmoved.
"I fail to understand how that story answers the question of why you need this marriage as much as I do."
Lise-Marie rolled her eyes. "Because after years of study, I somehow I fought my way into getting a job at the LHC, my lifelong dream. However, I have been renowned there for the wrong reasons: for my parties, for my fashion, for my looks. Everything but for the real reason I am there: to perform great science. So when I got this opportunity, to work with Sheldon Cooper on one of the great projects of our times," she paused, looking away. "It seemed too good to be true. And so it was."
"How so?" Sheldon asked.
She looked back at him. "Three weeks ago, the LHC asked Dr. Seibert to 'justify my presence' here at Caltech. Without you to vouch for me and explain my importance to the project, I could be back in Geneva doing smalltime work in a cubicle this time next week."
Sheldon turned away, looking at the far wall. His face was inscrutable.
"What is it, Sheldon?" she asked.
Sheldon turned to her. "So you proposed this marriage so that you wouldn't lose your position," he replied.
"Of course not," she insisted, placing two hands on his arm. He looked at them with uneasiness, and she pulled away. "Believe me; I am sincerely honored to be working with you. It would be a miscarriage of justice if you were dismissed from the project. That is how I truly feel."
He turned to her with doubt in his eyes. "Amy seems to believe otherwise."
"Amy is mistaken," she insisted. "She misunderstood some things I said earlier today. I felt awful when she walked away before I could make my meaning clear. Perhaps we could meet again and clear the air."
Sheldon shook his head, retreating from the conversation. But she had to have her answer.
"Sheldon," she said, urgently. "You must answer me this: What do you think of me as a scientist? Can I count on you to advocate for me to Siebert as I have so faithfully advocated for you?"
Sheldon barely paused before answering. "I think the LHC is wise in recalling you to Switzerland."
She looked at him in disbelief, crushed. "But you told me you thought I was critical to this project."
"I believe I said you had assisted me in some critical ways. You certainly help me get the paperwork done faster."
"Paperwork? Faster?" she repeated, completely deflated. Her bottom lip began to tremble and she placed a hand over her eyes, turning her grief-stricken face from him. A tear ran down her cheek.
"Why are you crying?"
"Are you really that dense, Sheldon? That naïve? I just confessed to you my entire struggle, my goals, my dreams and you just…" She walked off and poured herself another drink. "How can you be so cruel? So calloused?"
"I gave you the truth."
She took a sip from her drink—her hand was trembling—and then took a deep breath, sweeping away the puddle of tears that had collected on her chin. She brushed down her skirt and gathered herself.
"Fine," she said, clearing her throat. "I am a professional. I got this far because I have always been able to put my feelings to the side and get the job done. So, let us proceed with our original plan." She walked over to where he was on the couch and, suddenly formal, picked up the folder and began to show Sheldon a typed itinerary with notations. "Seibert will be in San Diego on Monday morning, so we should take advantage of his absence to get this done. I'll pick you up from the bookstore in Fairville Center at 8:00 on Monday morning and from there…"
As she spoke, Sheldon looked at the paper, staring at the lines of text until they began to fade together and the page went completely white.
"I don't want to do this."
She sighed. "Of course you don't. Nothing is good enough. We can change to a later time, or try another courthouse, although based on the research I've done on the wait times in Glendale—"
"I mean I don't want to get married," Sheldon said.
Lise-Marie shook her head several times, closing her eyes. "What are you saying?"
Sheldon rose. "I should go."
She rose as well, growing frantic. "Sheldon, surely you jest. We need you on that project. And what about your career? Are you just going to turn your back and walk away from—"
"I plan on speaking to the lawyers again and seeing if there has been any progress."
"But Sheldon, there hasn't been. They already said—" She started to protest and then just stopped. She was exhausted, discouraged and emot0ionally drained. "Nevermind," she said, shaking her head. "It is your life. You are free to do as you please."
With one final look, Sheldon turned and left for the door.
"I will see you on Monday, then," she called after him.
"Yes, of course," he said. She heard the door open and close.
From the couch, and sitting on her knees, she pulled back the curtain and watched as Sheldon pedaled away. She imagined him arriving home, greeted by a welcoming Amy at the door. She'd gloat in her triumph and laugh at Lise-Marie's misfortune as she and Sheldon cuddled around the fireplace. Sheldon would arrive to work and, with his luck, waters would part and he'd somehow ascend to ever greater heights as Lise-Marie descended into obscurity. The thought made her sick to her stomach.
She walked to the wall, turning out the light. She then sunk to the floor with her back against the wall, placing her head between her knees. Why is this happening to me?, she asked herself. What am I doing wrong?
The answer came to her like a flash in the dark: she had planned her entire future around riding Sheldon's coattails, but he had just discarded his coat—and her with it. If she was going to get what she wanted, she was going to have to remove him from the equation entirely.
And that's exactly what she was going to do.
Sheldon saw himself to the door and walked out. His bike was where he had left it on the side of the porch, and he mounted it, setting out for home.
Twenty minutes later, as he walked the stairs to the apartment, however, he took each step with increasing dread. He had no idea how he would be greeted… or what he would say. He stood outside the apartment door a moment, hesitant to go in. He finally entered and everything was dark. The apartment was quiet.
He walked back to their room and gently opened the door. He saw his family all asleep in the bed. Exiting just as carefully as he had entered, he turned around and walked back out to the living room. He lay down on the couch, pulling a stray afghan over himself and tried to fall asleep.
ENDNOTE: I love you guys! I got more love last chapter than ever, and whether you leave a review or read this story privately, we've been through close to 100,000 words together, and I thank you for that! Also, seriously, Lio is the best, beta or not. Really.
