AN- It's not as long as I wanted but it's here! Things are going to speed up a bit from this point on… I hope. I have started another story that probably won't be posted until it's done, something shorter and a bit more character focused to let me work more on my writing. My actual writing is something that gets left behind in this story, I feel like I am very focused on the plot and I sort of lose everything else. I am trying to find a happy balance.
Also! Thanks to all my readers who put up with some of my trash chapters, as I approach the home stretch of this story I want to make sure I have everything organize. I will be going through my chapters and making style corrections and deleting rambling I feel are cluttering the story. Along side this my Beta will be cleaning up my shit grammar :)
Because if this, chapters will probably be slowing down even more, BUT I swear this long ass story will be finished!
SIDE NOTE!
The Coffee Shop is pretty much on hold until I feel motivated to write it… I will think about doing something with it this week, but it's really just a side thing.
ANOTHER SIDE NOTE!
Got my wisdom teeth out on Friday, I was planning to finish this chapter and update sooner but then I was stoned out of my mind, and you know what they say… write drunk, edit sober, and do nothing but stare at the TV when on Hydrocodone… heh.
ANOTHER, ANOTHER SIDE NOTE!
I am obsessed with VOLTRON, my every thought is somehow entwined with this wonderful show! I can't take a breath without at least one syllable about this show passing between my lips, I could fucking INWARDS TALK about this show so that there is no break between caused by my inhaled breaths to interrupt the flowing river of words I have to say about this show. Every word I say that does not involve Voltron like holding a cigarette and not taking a drag (I don't smoke but I imagine that's what it's like)...
My roommate is sitting in the room with me and when she found out I was talking about how much I like Voltron again she sighed and said "I know Deets" in the same way you would placate a child, but I don't care because VOLTRON.
So if anyone wants to say something about Voltron to me, go ahead! I don't care if you say one single thing about my story in your review if you are talking to me about loving Voltron.
Thank you to my Beta minijaxter
Summary- This is a story about people, feelings and corruption. This is most definitely a story about magic. Because there is a lot more to the world of magic than just silly wand waving. When Harry decides to start making choices independent from Dumbledore's influence he discovers a much more than he expected. Perspective changes everything. It can also make things weird.
Warning- I don't think there are any for this chapter
Disclaimer- I own nothing in this story that is from the Harry Potter Universe. It is all owned by J.K. Rowling. Anything original in this story that may be similar to another work is coincidence and not intentional.
Harry Potter and the Magic of Perspective
Or (A.K.A)
Verum Inhereditas
Chapter 28
Purpose
Draco Malfoy looked scared, he was a lamb in a room of hungry wolves, all of whom were about to realize that he was the only prey left. After everything that had happened in the last 24 hours he could barely register the words Remus spoke, but the moment Harry stood up and agreed with Lupin the situation became clear. Draco could already feel the sharp teeth nipping at his heels.
Harry was about to spill all the inner circles secrets, including the most important one… the plan to kill Dumbledore and how it was Draco's fault that they had to. He tried to listen as the events unfolded, the Method's young leader was talking about trust and truth, but the words were all muffled by Draco's raging panic and an undertone of hurt that Remus would out him like this. He tried to arrange his face into an innocent expression, but it was skewed, a neatly organized desk that someone jostled.
Now someone else was talking, Longbottom maybe, he was saying something about Slytherin's and trust… Draco chanced a look at Severus but couldn't catch the older man's eyes, he was staring at Harry with a blank expression. Draco continued to watch as Severus stared at Harry, who was nodding while members of the Method droned on about their petty issues.
Then Harry glanced at Severus and Severus' expression shifted ever so slightly, Draco thought that most people wouldn't notice, but he did. He wasn't positive, but there seemed to be something else going on… and then it happened again, but this time it was Remus who looked at Severus and they both nodded very slightly.
Definitely something going on…
"WOAH, WOAH! WHAT DO YOU MEAN MY TEMPER?!" Ron's familiar and angry voice jarred Draco out of his thoughts.
Apparently he missed something while he was panicking. Ron was standing with his hands clenched at his sides and Harry had his own hands up in front of himself in a calming gesture.
"Ronald, we both know that you have a short fuse, remember fourth year?" Hermione spoke up in Harry's defense.
Ron backed down a bit, he looked decidedly ashamed, "yeah…"
Harry stepped around Hermione, "There are just a couple of situations we weren't being completely honest about with everyone… mostly due to some tension that we worried would cause problems."
"Tension?" Ginny questioned.
Harry nodded, "Yes, you for example, have not been very trusting with the Slytherin, starting with Draco."
A jolt of surprise went through Draco, what was going on? When was Harry going to tell everyone that they had to kill Dumbledore because of him? He tried to keep his face blank as he listened carefully to the events as they unfolded.
Ginny's face immediately contorted into something ugly in response to Harry's comment.
"I don't know what you're talking about," She firmly crossed her arms.
Harry sighed, "Oh, come on Ginny. You and Neville have been throwing looks at Draco since he joined, and when it seemed to be getting better Pansy came and you guys reverted to your old behavior."
"I have to agree with Harry about this," Hermione once again backed him up, "And I also have to point out that Draco and Pansy have been very mature about it as well."
Whispers of agreement ripped through the room.
"Even I learned to get along with that blond git, and Pansy's not bad too." Ron puffed his chest out and looked at his sister with a superior air.
Draco almost smiled when Ron insulted him, it had become almost like terms of endearment for them since they became friends. Even though everyone of the "inner Circle" was worried about Ron's temper, there was no denying he was a true friend and would throw himself into danger for Harry.
"Fine! Maybe I have been having trouble adjusting… it's just hard after all the years of animosity."
There was a hint of tears in Ginny's voice. Neville put his hand on her shoulder while nodding in agreement.
Hermione stepped forward and took control of the situation, Harry looked a bit relieved.
"This is exactly why we kept things from you guys. We have responsibilities and goals that we can't stop just because one person has qualms about it based on old hatred, which will cause problems within the Method."
Draco once again felt dread, what truth was going to be revealed? He tried to trust Harry and Hermione, they were his friends. He would have to dig deep down, very deep… and find his Hufflepuff loyalty.
"So what have you been keeping from us?" Neville spoke up, his voice was steady.
Before Hermione could answer Harry took the attention of the room back. Draco felt his heart jump, if Harry was going to take the control back from Hermione then he was going into leader mode. His shoulders straightened, his head was held higher and everyone in the rooms felt their eyes drawn to him.
"I should have told everyone, I was worried about how it would be received… and so when I learned the truth I kept it close to my chest, like Dumbledore would have."
The strong statement from their leader was met with silence, but he didn't look nervous and simply explained.
"After Draco joined the Method, we learned what his mission from Voldemort was…"
"We know," Fred interrupted.
"He was going to let Death Eaters into the school," George other finished.
Harry nodded.
Draco felt his insides squirm as he waited for the final words to cast his fate. He remembered when they told everyone the partial truth to cover up the larger problem of his orders from the Dark Lord.
"What I didn't tell you…" Harry continued.
Draco's entire body clenched for the blow.
"…is that we were going to continue with Draco's plan of using the vanishing cabinets in the room of requirement to set a trap for the death eaters."
Draco let out a very large breath into the silence. Maybe his trust wasn't misplaced, maybe the looks he saw going between Sev and Harry really meant they had a plan.
The first person to break the silence was unsurprisingly, Ginny.
"You were going to endanger everyone in the school so you could set a trap?!" Her voice was filled with righteous anger, "Did you even think of what would happen if something went wrong, what if someone got killed?!" she continued to rant, but Harry endured it like a stone tower in a storm.
Draco simply tuned her out as he absorbed the fact that he was safe, he glanced at Severus who was looking directly at him. The older man gave a small, rare, smile which only irritated Draco, Sev knew exactly what was going on and let Draco hang in suspense.
"This is the type of idiotic plan that almost got you killed…" Ginny was red faced and throwing flames from her mouth when she was interrupted.
"What do you mean you were going to use the plan to trap Death Eaters," Ron's completely calm voice and absolute dismissal of his sister threw everyone off balance, and effectively shut Ginny up.
Harry recovered quickly, "Well, now that Severus and Draco can't spy there's no one to tell Voldemort when the cabinet is done… well, no one he would believe."
Ron's eyes took on a faraway look that meant he was using his great knowledge of strategy, "So all you need is a spy?"
"That is what Harry said, I am astounded by your ability to retain what you hear Mr. Weasley," Severus' comment caused a small wave of chuckles, and the tension in the room melted a bit.
Ron on the other hand completely ignored him. His expression was one of someone doing a very complicated puzzle.
"Couldn't we just… you know…" Ron, looked around at everyone waiting for him to speak, his face became the same shade as his hair.
He took a calming breath, "Couldn't we use Pettigrew?"
Hermione smacked her fist down on her palm, "That's brilliant! I can't believe we forgot!"
"Can someone fill me in?" Harry asked.
Hermione jumped at the chance to explain something, "Pettigrew owes you a life debt Harry, you can give him any task you want and he has to do it! We can use him to get information… although I don't think he can help us with the vanishing cabinet plan."
"Why not?" Neville asked, he got a sharp glare from Ginny.
Severus moved his hand to his head catching the room's eyes, and tapped his temple.
A sound of understanding came from Ron, "I forgot, legilimency. If Pettigrew suddenly brought up the cabinet, Voldypants would probably get suspicious."
Ginny turned sharply towards Ron, "Why aren't you more upset about this? Harry was making plans to let Death Eaters into the school! He was hiding things from us! He…"
Ron grabbed both of his sister's shoulders and turned her to face him, she went silent in surprise. He bored into her with his startlingly blue eyes.
"Ginny," his voice sounded more mature than anticipated.
Draco watched as Ron told his sister an honest truth that she still hadn't comprehended.
"We are at war."
The words rang in everyone's ears, it was something everyone knew and no one had voiced. Draco was grateful that someone had finally said it; with his father dead and his mother defeated it was more apparent than ever what was at risk.
Ginny turned pale, Ron took his eyes off her and looked over her shoulder at Draco, "It's time to stop acting like this is a schoolyard rivalry and look outside of Hogwarts."
Everyone looked at Draco when it became apparent that Ron wasn't speaking directly to Ginny anymore.
All the sad and understanding faces made Draco want to duck away, but he stood still and fought down the wave of emotion that washed over him, and in a clear voice responded.
"There are lives at stake."
Ginny looked as if she had been slapped in the face, and Neville was pale as paper, they had both forgotten that someone died that night, and left behind his son, and it wouldn't be the last time it happened.
Everyone settled down after that. For the rest of the evening the Method simply talked. Remus had meant his outburst but he had unintentionally almost revealed larger secrets, but he wasn't wrong. Draco realized it was quick thinking that turned the mistake into a good excuse for dirty laundry to be aired and the long standing problems between members to be fixed. He was almost impressed by the Slytherin maneuvers that took place.
Draco was grateful that he wasn't alone as the evening went on; they all just continued to talk and learn about each other, except Severus, who slipped out after everything calmed.
Draco had been afraid of being alone, going to bed and seeing his father's body behind his eyes or dreaming about his mother's torture.
This distraction was good.
Severus quietly closed the door to Narcissa's room. He was sure she would sleep for a while longer. Halfway down the hall to the stairs he stopped briefly. The door before him was the same as the others; it was what it blocked from view that made it ominous.
Severus' hand made it to the knob but was unable to turn, instead he placed his palm to the door and said a silent goodbye to his misguided friend and moved on. He slowed only once more in front of the door to the blue room, he heard voices but no yelling and decided it was ok to leave everyone in Remus' care.
Although he was released from his place at the Dark Lord's side, he had another master that he was still tied to for the time being, and he needed to report in.
The kitchen smelled of ceramic dust and old wood that floated in the air. Severus moved smoothly over the wreckage while he looked for the object of his desire, and he found it in a pile of broken tea cups. He picked up the small wooden container that was sealed with magic.
From inside he pulled a pinch of floo powder, and with a flash of green he was gone from the safe house.
He knew the path to his destination by heart, he could walk it with his eyes closed from any part of the school, including from the Come and Go Room. The gargoyle moved without even needing a password and granted access to the golden, swirling stairs.
The large door at the top of the steps also opened without knocking or prompting.
"Severus, I expected you sooner."
The voice came from across the room; as usual Dumbledore was at his desk, looking as if he was waiting especially for whoever entered.
Severus crossed the room and took the seat opposite from the Headmaster.
"I am sorry Albus; I had to stay behind to secure my place in the Dark Lords ranks." The lie flowed smoothly as it had many times before.
Dumbledore looked over his half-moon glasses, but he did not try to look into Severus' mind.
"Of course, can you enlighten me as to what happened earlier this evening to bring down the Malfoy wards?"
Severus jumped into a half lie, half true story. He explained that the Dark Lord planned an impromptu marking ceremony for Narcissa that Draco and he did not know about… which was half true. He also made sure to speak as if Draco was at home and recovering as Albus believed him to be. He told Dumbledore that he was called to a Death Eater meeting and was blindsided… completely true. He explained the happenings up to Narcissa's magical outburst exactly as they unfolded. Instead of finding a way to explain the portkey, he told the Headmaster that Lucius used the emergency spell to drop the Malfoy wards and save his wife and son from Voldemort. The emergency spell did exist, but had never been used by a Malfoy before, so it was the perfect cover. Severus then explained that the three Malfoys apparated away to parts unknown and described the aftermath as it actually happened.
Dumbledore placed his hands together under his chin, his blue eyes held sorrow.
"I am sorry for the loss of your snakes Severus, they were too young," he said earnestly.
Severus genuinely appreciated Albus' words and he felt a spark of his old affection for the Headmaster, warm him inside.
"Thank you, hopefully we will be able to find the ones that escaped."
"Yes," Albus agreed, "But I did not only want to speak of the events at Malfoy manor."
"Oh?" Severus was legitimately surprised, he wasn't sure what to expect, which was his least favorite feeling.
The Headmasters blue eyes became dark and the hands below his chin laced together.
"I wanted to have a talk with you about what is to come after I am gone."
A chill went up Severus' spine, the reminder of what he had to do hit him harder now that he was in front of the man he would be killing. He was also confused, he already had this conversation with Albus shortly after he had taken the Vow, and a second one earlier in the year… was he going senile?
"I know we already spoke about what you must do to help Harry after I depart," Albus began, already confirming Severus' thoughts.
"But there is something else, about Harry that I need you to know. He has a destiny that you will need to make sure he fulfills. This task may prove the most difficult of them all, even more so than sending me away."
Surprise gave way to a sick feeling deep in Severus' chest. They had already talked about the horcrux's, only weeks after Harry had brought news of them to the Method, Dumbledore revealed their existence to Severus and explained his role in helping Harry find them from behind the scenes.
Albus was putting a lot on his Spy's shoulders, and now there was more. Something that was apparently worse than having to kill his old mentor and that was hard to believe.
Dumbledore returned to the topic at hand after his short silence.
"I am sorry to have to ask this one last favor, but you are the only person I can trust with this information."
The sick feeling seeped deeper, spreading from Severus' chest to the pit of his stomach. This was information that Albus held close to his chest the entire war, something no one else knew… it could not be good news.
Dumbledore took Severus' silence as acceptance.
"Harry is more important than I have let people know," The look on Severus' face must have clearly stated his thoughts, because Dumbledore sighed and started again.
"I know you probably don't believe that he can become more important after the Prophecy was revealed, but it is true. The Prophecy is not going to be fulfilled because Tom has an obsession with killing Harry; it is being fulfilled because of Harry. Neither can survive this war, Severus."
Now Severus wanted to be sick, his mind tried to wander back to the day Harry unlocked Ron's ability. When he confronted Harry in the infirmary and learned about what Ron had seen in Harry's scar, and his suspicions… NO! He clamped down on those thoughts, he did his research, and there had never been a human one! What Ron saw was only the connection between the Dark Lord and Harry due to the killing curse… it had to be.
Albus waited, Severus knew he wasn't hiding his thoughts very well; his face probably gave away everything he was thinking. The Headmaster watched as he made the connection and then rejected his conclusion.
"I am Sorry Severus, but I must ask you to make sure Harry fulfills his destiny. He is a hocrux and must die at Voldemort's hands, or all is lost."
Snape reacted before he could stop himself; he stood violently, knocking his chair to the ground as he rose.
"NO!" The word came without permission.
Albus looked down at his desk, his eyes were tired, and his silence was heavy. It was obvious how much this situation weighed on the old man… but Severus didn't give a fuck!
He marched over to the headmaster's desk and slammed his hands flat on the surface. He leaned forward so that he could hiss his fury into the old man's face. Anger was the only thing keeping the rolling nausea at bay, and he grasped onto his anger to keep his panic down.
"Are you telling me you knew this whole time, ever since he was a baby?" Severus' words were almost a whisper between his clenched teeth, but they conveyed his rage with more efficiency than yelling ever could.
Albus looked up from the desk, there was no shame on his face like Severus expected, only righteousness, and this brought his anger to levels he thought impossible.
"I had to keep it a secret Severus, understand that he could not die before it was time and he had to be raised to be willing."
Raised to be willing?! Those words ignited a flash of blinding rage in Severus, the very notion that Harry was raised just to die burned him from the inside out, Harry was worth so much more than being a sacrificial lamb! Severus was made of nothing but rage and darkness, and he wanted to turn it all outward at the old man.
Before he could completely register what he was doing, Severus let his rage fly from his body as a physical release. He swept his arms across the top of the Headmaster's desk with the momentum of his entire upper body. Papers, books, ink wells, quills and delicate silver gadgets crashed to the ground. The sound was awful and sharp but at the same time loud and rolling, and it was somehow only a small fraction of the roaring in Severus' ears.
After the deafening crash, there was an eerie stillness, Severus now understood why Harry had destroyed the Headmasters office last spring, it was very cathartic.
Angry, heaving breaths filled the void left by the ringing sound of metal and glass colliding with the floor. Severus stood tall and recollected himself.
"He had to be raised to be willing?" The deadly whisper was back, threatening to over flow into a violent rage once again.
Harry's deepest memories, ones only shared with Severus, flickered in the back of his mind. Isolation, hunger, pain, but most of all the feeling of being worthless and unnatural- feelings Harry only allowed Severus to know because he had no choice in their occlumency lessons, feelings purposely instilled in him by the headmaster to make him easier to manipulate. Everything was falling into place; all of Dumbledore's moves in this war game came together with the revelation of Harry being a horcrux. The only reason Severus didn't see it before was because he simply refused to admit it was a possibility to begin with, the soft spot he had formed for Harry was blinding him.
"Yes, he needed to become the type of person that would give up his life for those he loved, someone who would put others before themselves." Dumbledore's calm never wavered, even in the face of Severus' violent outburst.
"You mean someone with NO SELF WORTH!" Snape's hands were slammed back onto the now empty desk.
Dumbledore did not react, but his silence only confirmed what Severus had deduced. He let out a sound that was almost a growl.
"You left Harry with Tuney," He practically spat the pet name, "and her orc of a husband, knowing how they would treat him. Knowing that they would grind him down to fit into the slot you made for him in your little game."
Albus folded his hands slowly, "I did not make that slot Severus, it has always been there. I simply facilitated his ability to fit into it."
Gone was the calm façade that Albus used to keep control of a situation, and in its place was cold calculation. Severus knew this side of the Headmaster well, it always came out when he needed to have an iron grip on his emotions, it let him know the old man wasn't an emotionless monster- but it was almost worse knowing that he did feel and went through with his "for the greater good" plans anyway.
"I am surprised," Albus continued in a cool tone, "That you know so much about Harry's home life."
Severus almost faltered, "I am not an idiot Albus, and I knew Tuney growing up. I know what she could be like; I have also had the displeasure of meeting her husband."
"Then you understand why he was left there, Harry could not end up like his father. He needed to be humble and pliant." Dumbledore's tone sounded final, as if his explanation closed the subject.
Severus' was having none of it, his anger still hot in his chest.
"HUMBLE AND PLIANT?!" He yelled.
Then he leaned farther over the desk, "Do you know how dangerous your decision was, what Potter could have become?" his words were pushed between his teeth in a vain attempt to control his temper.
"He would not have become that," Dumbledore did not speak the word, equally unwilling to say it as Severus was.
"You don't know that for sure Albus, you dropped a potentially magically powerful infant into the perfect environment to turn into one of those… he could have taken out half of London." Severus couldn't voice it; the thought of any child being that tortured inside was horrendous.
"But I do know," there was complete certainty in the Headmaster's eyes, "Tom would never have let that happen. The piece of him in Harry needed the boy whole and sane."
Severus doesn't respond, his normally sharp tongue was without words, the old man was crazy.
Albus must have taken the silence as a sign that his spy was seeing reason.
"Will you fulfill my final wish Severus? Guide Harry, help him fulfill the prophecy."
There was nothing Severus could do, arguing was pointless, and he needed to keep the Headmaster's trust. Without another option or any outlet for his continuing rage, Severus dragged it deep into himself. He looked straight into the blue eyes of the man he was going to kill, who was asking him to help a teenager commit suicide, and reinforced his mental shields.
"Yes."
Fluffy flakes slowly fell, there was no wind and so they went straight down creating the idealistic image of what winter should look like. It wasn't too heavy or too light, and was exactly like Harry always imagined when he thought of Hogwarts in the winter. He sat in shorts and a T-shirt with his legs hanging over the edge of his doorway, bare feet swinging free. His dogwood tree was bare of leaves and flowers, but the snow was so light that it piled up on the branches like cotton.
It had been a while since Harry had spent an entire night in his mindscape and not let himself dream. He touched the glass bead on his necklace and admired how the strings of magic flowing off of it shimmered in the snowy air. The three strings told Harry that Luna was still sleeping, Ron was just waking up and Hermione was already wide awake. Ever since Harry unlocked Hermione's core abilities she had been sleeping less. Most of her time was spent in the small private Library behind the creepy bookcase; the only person who dared to enter her new domain was Remus. They were working on a few things, but had only revealed one of the projects they had brewing. They were compiling all the information they could from the secret library and from the Method members about Core magic, creating a reference book like no other that's ever existed.
Harry was slightly worried about his friend's obsessive research, but he hoped that once it was out of her system she would scale it back a bit. Ron on the other hand seemed perfectly fine with Hermione practically locking herself in the hidden office. He said something about there being worse places she could be hiding in, and Harry had a suspicion he was still on edge about her time spent with Professor Jigger… for who know what reason. The potions professor was still in Hogwarts infirmary in a coma.
Harry let his mind wander, in general things were calm with the Method, and the only thing bothering Harry was the slow speed of their progress. He needed to remove more curses but the magical strain held him back. He needed to keep tabs on Voldemort but they had yet to make contact with Peter. He needed to recruit more members but school was out and they had no way to find trustworthy people. Harry felt like he had a sharp blade pressed against him and one false movement would be the end. That was probably the reason he withdrew to his mind scape this time, it helped him relax.
Harry continued to swing his legs; he enjoyed the peace that filled him while he was safe in his tree. He let his mind become blank and every corner of his psyche relax like tense shoulder muscle getting a good massage. Maybe he was getting the hang of this leader of war thing, after the crisis with Draco's parents, things began to smooth out. Well... Narcissa still didn't really interact with anyone except the Slytherins, and the disposal of Lucius' body had been weird. They cleaned him of all evidence and left him in Diagon Alley to be found when the shops began to open, leaving his death to be interpreted as a warning from the Dark Lord. It made Harry feel like a mob boss from one of those movies Dudley used to watch. Draco and Narcissa were surprisingly OK with this plan; overall it gave their loved one the best chance of getting a proper burial, even if it was from the ministry.
Besides all that mess he felt like he was starting to really get into the core of his role. Now he could begin freeing all the method members from their curse, slowly, as his magic allowed.
Things were finally settling-
BANG!
"HARRY!"
Harry flailed to a sitting position with half a scream in his mouth. His hand clutched his chest while he breathed heavily to calm his heart.
Hermione stood in the doorway of his Grimmauld place bedroom with her arms wrapped around a book held to her chest, the door she slammed open was slowly creaking back towards her after bouncing off the wall. She was smiling brightly, obviously very excited, and didn't seem to care that she just barged in without knocking.
With a skip in her step, she rushed over to his bed and hopped on with nimble grace that she always seemed to have when she was happy.
"Oh good, you're awake!" She was either being facetious or she was so excited she really didn't notice he had been sleeping.
Harry blinked slowly at her, still not completely aware of his surroundings. He was still half asleep and now on the tail end of an adrenalin spike.
"Wha..?" Harry couldn't vocalize his confusion.
Hermione held out the book she was hugging, almost bouncing in excitement.
Harry slowly looked down at it, the first thing he noticed was that it wasn't a regular book, it was a sketch book. He leaned in closer, squinting through his sleep fogged eyes he could see intricate line work, symbols and writing. His sleep addled mind tried to make sense of the information on the page, but all he could think was that it looked kind of pretty.
"It's pretty," Harry mumbled the only thing his mind was telling him. He really needed a cup of coffee.
Hermione's radiant smile settled into a thin line and she slapped Harry's arm.
"It's not just pretty; it's the solution to our problem."
"This drawing is going to kill Voldemort?" Harry yawned, covering his mouth with the back of his hand.
Hermione huffed and slapped Harry's arm again, only harder this time.
"Ooowww," Harry whined and rubbed the red mark forming on his skin.
Hermione sighed, "Will you be serious?"
"I was being serious, killing Voldemort is sorta our biggest problem," Harry shrugged as he spoke.
Hermione smacked him one last time and then ignored his comment, choosing to move forward with her explanation.
"This," She pointed at the drawing, "is part of my core ability, and it's going to allow us to speed up removing people's curses."
Now Harry's attention was fully focused on Hermione and her crazy looking sketch. This was something Harry had been yearning for, his need to move forward and go faster. The feeling was a knife's edge pressing against his skin, just hard enough to hurt but not break the surface. He had put a lot of effort into keeping the sharp edge from cutting into him; the last time he gave in it almost killed Ron.
But here was Hermione, like a shining light in the darkness, offering to pull Harry's hand off the knife handle and help him turn it against his enemies.
"Tell me everything."
Those three words lit Hermione's face like a lumos spell and she leapt into her explanation, the knowledge flowed from her naturally, as important to her survival as the air she breathed.
"Ever since you removed my curse, my mind has been moving so fast I can barely keep up!"
Harry held back a snort, and almost choked on it. If she could barely keep up with her thoughts, then they would probably explode a normal person's head. He kept his thoughts to himself and listened as Hermione continued to explain, so enthralled that she had missed him laughing at her expense.
"I have figured out a magical array we can use, I can activate it with my magic and it will amplify yours. I tailored it specifically to you and your magic and core ability. By amplifying your magic you can use less to remove people's curses and thus less recovery time!"
A sweeping excitement rushed through Harry, he felt like there was a clear path for him, a job to do. He had a clear objective handed to him in a way that only Hermione could accomplish. He smiled, and she smiled back, the golden morning sun from his window set her frizzy halo of hair alight. Her eyes shined in the way they always did when she solved a puzzle, only brighter now with her magic unlocked, and she was flushed with the rush of discovery. The soft spot in Harry that loved Hermione, in a way he thought loving a sibling would feel like, grew larger. He clung to it and to her; he could always count on her to keep him on his feet and walking towards his goals.
The part of Harry that knew he needed help, because he was human and all humans needed help sometimes, came forward and he hugged Hermione.
He let out a breath he felt like he had been holding since the first time he removed a cure, the ill-fated night that almost got him killed in Hogwarts great hall.
"Thank you," He whispered in the same relieved breath.
Once again positive he couldn't do this without Hermione.
Later that day in the blue room, Hermione played with a tiny glass jar that was tied around her wrist with a leather cord. Inside the jar was an impossibly small copy of Hogwarts: A History.
Harry had to smother a laugh that tried to escape when Hermione's anchor was her first magical book; it was so fitting it almost hurt. Ron had been less tactful and did laugh, earning himself a slap on the arm and an irritated Hermione.
Harry pondered his memories, his friends and himself as he watches Hermione transfer her drawing onto the wood floor in large scale. His mind was in a state of half an occlumency trance and half aware of his surroundings as he sat on one of the couches pushed against the wall to make room for the magic array. Harry was idly flipping through his recent memories and self-discoveries, filing them away here and there, or he would putz around with his barrier.
His eyes were glazed while he simultaneously took in every detail of his friend on the floor happily working and organized his mind. Being only half a part of the present caused a muffled sort of view port for Harry, like watching everything through an old camcorder.
This was a rare moment, it was quiet and warm, just two friends sitting in a comfortable silence. Hermione was bent over a small part of her array, trying to get it just right, content and fulfilled were the only words to describe her in that moment. She was made entirely of curiosity and determination, all of it pointing outward at every challenge she took on, it was in every swipe of her hand over the floor and each thoughtful pause she took to collect her thoughts.
Harry found himself filing this memory away in a safe place as it played out before him.
The door opened, and grabbed Harry's attention. Severus walked in, he looked tired, Harry unconsciously noted. In his half trance, his mind was on autopilot, he tended to absorb environmental information and pull up facts about everything he was seeing.
Severus was a man made of rough edges and sharp glares, he turned them to face anything new or that even slightly annoyed him. He threw sarcasm and biting words from a distance and let very few people get close.
But right now, he was just tired and strangely vulnerable. It was more common to see the man's outer defenses lowered a degree when he was in the safe house, surrounded by people he chose to trust, but this was more than usual. Harry filed these observations away in his section for Severus.
He also noted that this was the first time he had seen Severus in several days. It wasn't uncommon for the older man to be gone for a few days, but since classes were out Harry expected him to be around more.
When was the last time he saw Severus?
Harry turned even more inward, his meditation deepened as he looked through his memories.
Ah, Severus slipped out the night Draco retrieved his mother. Harry was one of the few to notice but assumed the spy left to report to the Headmaster. It was strange that he didn't come back to share what happened with the Method.
Snape's black eyes suddenly blocked Harry's view, a pulse pushed against his mind, almost like a sharp jab that was distinctly Severus. The sudden mental push broke Harry's trance.
"You shouldn't spend too much time like that," Severus' words rang clear through Harry's forced awareness.
He cringed at the sharp clarity of his surroundings, "Why not?"
"Do what?" Hermione looked up from her work.
Severus didn't answer either of them, and Harry saw that his normal defenses were back in place like they had never left. Maybe they were never gone and Harry only saw what he did because of his mental state, he could have picked up on micro expressions and body language.
He wanted to ask if something was wrong, but he didn't, Severus would only lie, and he was very good at lying. Harry was irritated for a moment, but he let it slide. Severus would tell him eventually, or considering the vulnerability Harry had seen, it could be personal.
"Do what?" Hermione repeated.
Severus sighed and looked at her, "Harry was in a meditative state used for occlumency."
He looked at Harry, "A state that can cause a person to become too inwardly facing if they are not careful."
Hermione hummed to herself but didn't inquire further; she was drawn back to her work like a magnet.
Severus joined Harry on the couch and watched the array practically materialize from Hermione's hands.
"What's this?" he asked pointedly.
Without looking away from her work, Hermione explained, this time in more detail than she had given Harry. She told Severus about each piece of the array as she drew it.
An hour later, Hermione's work was finished and she declared it as she stretched her sore back.
A wave of anticipation flows up from Harry's toes to meet the burning excitement in his chest. He wanted to grab the first person he saw stilled cursed and drag them into the room to try out the array.
Hermione beat him to the punch, "I want Remus to be next."
Ron played with the trim of his robe, he sat next to Harry but his eyes were transfixed by the large drawing on the floor. The unnaturally bright blue eyes traced each line as if he were watching a mouse scurry around a maze.
"That's cool," He muttered.
"Isn't it?" Hermione preened, and they struck up a conversation about what he was seeing and how Hermione created the array.
Sometimes Harry wished he could see what Ron did, everything to do with magic fascinated his friend ever since his gift was unlocked.
The door opened quietly and Remus poked his head in, he opened his mouth to speak but quickly lost his words when he caught sight of Hermione's work.
He fully entered the room and smiled, "Oh, Hermione, it came out wonderfully."
Hermione beamed, "Thanks, Remus!
Remus moved to the couch with Ron and Harry.
"I'm looking forward to seeing it in action."
Remus sat forward in anticipation.
"Well that's good," Harry placed his hand on Remus' shoulder, "because you are the first person it's being used on."
"One day you will discover your purpose, and then you will tell no one, and then you will die."
-Night Vale
AN- Do you ever think about time… and also like… death? (both are scary) Not death as in what happens after you die, but like as a deadline? (forgive the pun) I am very stressed out by deadlines, both in school and the symbolic ones in life that I am only aware of because of the social construct of society which dictates what ages I am supposed to have completed a certain task by. Anyone else think about this as much as I do?
A third deadline that's always on my mind is debt, which seems like it is on everyone's mind lately… death is literally my deadline for this (Pun intended). I feel like I don't have enough time to do all the things expected of me (Even if I have already rejected some of them, like having kids) and also pay my debt. All of this is monumentally STUPID because money and debt are also things that only exist within society. The only things that are real out of all of this trash are time and death, and time is probably not linear, we only perceive it like that so our heads don't explode or something. The deadline is not approaching like a fish being reeled in on a line, its swirling all the fuck around us and we just have to hope we don't smack the fuck into it.
Where was I going with this? I can't remember…
All I know is that if I were immortal I would have no debt deadline… or no deadlines at all if I wanted.
(PUN INTENDED)
(NOT SORRY)
