It's been a long time since I've updated. I recently got a summer job and it's taking up my time. Life happened too. The days go by so fast in summer vacation~ I won't let it stop me from updating.

To make it up to you guys, I made the scheme longer in length than usual.

1. If you're raising money to help a fellow country (or a human), don't let them know until the end. However, it's an option not to let them know about the good deed at all.

2. Schemes can be legal or not. (Try not to get arrested or worse.)

3. The schemes can range from a country's specialty to ideas from the news.

4. Countries can team up and work together.

5. Countries (or their pets) are allowed to crash other countries schemes, making them succeed or not. Everything is fair game when it comes to money.

The golden rule: If possible, don't spend money to make money.


Greece sits in one of the seats facing the large stage with velvet curtains. The lights are dim, but people can find their way around. He takes a sip of his coffee and sets it down in the empty seat next to him. He needs to stay awake long enough for the auditions to finish. The auditions will range from singers, drummers, and other instruments. He's wants to do this all in one go. Plenty of people are coming to the auditions so he might get some decent band members.

He has a brilliant idea of starting a band. He'll be the manager while the band members do all the hard work. They'll tour all over his country performing on the streets for tips and hopefully land some gigs if they're lucky. He'll listen to good music and no effort is needed from him.

One of his many cats is on the arm-chair with a clip board in its mouth. The fluffy brown cat meows as it lightly shakes the clipboard. Greece gently takes it and pets the cat's head. It purrs lovingly as Greece scratches behind its ear. "Thank you."

Greece reads off the clip board, "Audition number one." A pudgy man enters from behind the curtains. He's wearing a green shirt with the print 'This is Sparta, bitch' with plain brown shorts. He stands in the middle of the stage where the spotlight is. The man seems very nervous. His fingers are twitchy and he's sweating a lot.

Greece keeps direct eye contact with the man. "What can you do?"

The man pats his large stomach in a rhythm. He hums with the beat he's making. Greece can't help but stare in bewilderment. His eyes focus on the man's chubby fingers, memorized by the man's stomach flapping with each pat. The performer does this for two minutes before finishing it with a "Ta da~" The man's face is flushed as he twiddles his fingers.

Greece blinks his eyes. "….What was that?" He wasn't expecting bizarre performances like this. Maybe some amateur players, but not this…performance.

The man's hand pulls his collar with nervousness. "Well, the poster said you were looking for unique talents so I thought why not do this? It's sure to draw crowds." Maybe Greece should be more specific if he makes another poster in the future for whatever reason. He'll type something along the lines of 'No stomach patting, please. Or anything strange.' The performer mumbles under his breath, "I think." This didn't escape Greece's ears.

Greece thinks to himself, 'I don't think it's a good idea to have him in my band. I doubt he actually has any talent in instruments or singing besides the stomach patting.' He's not taking any iffy risks like this. People won't take the band seriously with the stomach patter. Heck, they won't even be labeled as a band. Freak show, more like it.

Greece takes his pen and crosses the man's name off the list. "Next."

The man wobbles closer to the front. "A-Am I in? Do I g-get the job?"

Greece sighs. "No."

The man drops to his knees. "Please, I'll do anything to be in your band."

He doesn't have time for this. The sooner he's done with the performances, the sooner he can take his nap. Coffee can only keep him awake for so long. "Security."

Ten cats dressed in cute blue security uniforms jump out from the right side of the curtains. They lurk closer to the performer and hiss at him. Greece needed security, so he used his military. They work for catnip and petting. They're more effective and he enjoys their company.

The man stands up and backs away, scared. "W-What are they doing." Greece ignores him. He admires the security uniforms on the cats. He must thank Japan for these Christmas presents. He may not be using the uniforms for its intended purpose, which is cosplay when he brings cats to anime conventions with Japan, but they came in handy.

The cats lunge at the man and bite him in varying places. The man runs around in circles screaming, "Holy mother of- Get off me!" He holds a tomcat away from his face. The man screams and runs to the exit backstage. The cats detach themselves from him. They calmly go back to their hiding spots behind the curtain.

Greece repeats, "Next."

Another man walks onto the stage. He's wearing nothing except swim trunks. Drops of water drip onto the floor, forming little puddles. Greece raises an eyebrow at the man's attire. He's wondering if the man just came from the beach and nearly forgot about his audition.

The second performer says, "I will now sing the national anthem." The man sounds like he's trying to suck up to him by being patriotic. He'll be the judge if it works or not.

He coughs into his hand before he starts singing. "I knew thee from Candy land-" Greece narrows his eyes.

This man is already off at a rough start. 'He better not be messing up the lyrics on purpose.'

He snaps out of his furry for a moment to put his focus back on the performance. "-hail, Emperor Romano. Hail-"

Greece rarely gets mad over anything. In fact, it's difficult for him to even be mad, let alone show any signs of anger. This man is pushing his buttons for badly screwing up his national anthem. He doesn't even recognize it at all. It's destroyed beyond recognition by this singer. He questions who would mess up this badly. He understands why a singer would mess up a few words if they get too nervous singing in front of a crowd. But this is ridicules.

Is he mocking his national anthem and culture? He doesn't like this one bit. 'Why is Romano in my anthem anyway? He's Italian, not Greek.'

Greece angrily says, "Next and security." He wants this man out of his sight and far away from him as possible.

The man pauses in mid singing. "But I haven't finished singing yet." The cats leap at him. Caught off guard, he takes a step back and slips from the puddle. He falls to the floor with the cats biting him. He rolls around the floor with the cats jumping on him so they don't get squished. He screams, "I'm allergic to cats." He wheezes uncontrollably as a furball lands inside his mouth.

The swim trunk man rolls himself off the stage and continues rolling around. The security cats become bored with him. They leap onto Greece's and cuddle with him. Greece's furry subsides a bit. He gently pets the tomcat on his lap.

The swim trunks man gets on his feet and runs out the exit, screaming for his mother the entire way.

A young man walks out from behind the curtains with his flute in hand. He looks at Greece, confused. "What's with all the screaming? I've been hearing it with each performer."

Greece nonchalantly replies, "They couldn't handle show business." He doesn't need to know about his security force unless he screws up badly or refuses to leave.

Greece remembers at the moment to cross off the other performer off the list. "You can start now."

The man nods and plays his flute. A beautiful melody flows out the flute. Greece can't help to hum along with the music. He sees potential with this performer. The money will come in hoards with this flute player.

The performer finishes his song and looks intently at Greece. The Greek nods. "You're in."

He grins. "So, how much are you paying me?"

Greece becomes nervous with his question. "We'll talk about money later." This is exactly the reason why Greece advertised in the first place. He wants to gather the most people as he possibly can in a short amount of time. The second reason, he wants cheap labor. If he wanted an expensive flute player, he would've become a talent scout or something.

The performer leaps from the stage and walks up to Greece's face. "Look, I don't want to be swindled of the salary I deserve. Pay me good money, or I'm leaving."

Greece doesn't need to yell 'security' for his security force to attack. The cats screech as they launch themselves at the flute player.

The flute player ducks to the ground and the cats soar over him. He gets up and runs out of the theatre yelling all the way.

Greece yawns. "I'll never find a decent band member if all the performances are like this."

A man dashes from behind the curtains. He slides on his knees and speaks into the microphone. "I'll show all those cowards how show business is done."

Greece takes a closer look at the man. He feels like he recognizes the man from somewhere. He's very familiar.

His eyes widen as he sees the familiar mask on his face. "Turkey?"

Turkey stops singing and glares at Greece. He jabs at finger in Greece's direction. "It's you!"

He jumps off the stage and jabs the microphone in Greece's chest. "What are you doing here?" Turkey looks towards the other empty seats. "Where's the judge?"

Greece slaps the microphone from Turkey's hand. "I'm the judge. Why are you here?" It's sort of shocking to see Turkey in his country on his own free will. He must have sinister motives.

Turkey huffs. "It's none of your business if I want to shoot to stardom and make tons of cash."

Greece and Turkey get into a heated argument over the best ways to become famous. They both fail to see three identical women walking onto the stage. Their long black hair stops at their waists and their bangs almost cover their eyes.

One of the triplets coughs into their hands. "We'll be humming some high notes." Her voice stops the arguing. Turkey takes a seat on the other side of Greece.

Greece nods. "You can start now."

The triplets hum the high notes in unison. The two countries lean out of their seats. Greece is mesmerized by their singing. His senses dull and the tension in his body is fading away. He wants to listen to them all day.

The women stop humming. They ask in unison, "Well?"

Greece snaps out of the trance. His eye flickers to Turkey. The Turk is slouched back in his seat with a dazed look in his eyes. Drool falls from his mouth.

Greece's mind is struck with a realization. The trance these women put them both in and Turkey's dazed state. There's only one possible explanation. "You women wouldn't happen to be sirens?"

The women simply reply with boredom in their voices, "Yes, we are."

Greece must have these women on his band. With them, he doesn't need to continue the auditions. He can have them hypnotize people into liking the band. He sees them as a goldmine. Hopefully they don't want a huge salary.

The women squeal when they see his security force licking themselves near the curtain. They rush to the cats and cuddle with them. One of the women squeaks, "I love cats. I wish I had a pet cat." The other two women agree with her.

Greece smiles. "I'll give you some cats in exchange for your work for me. You can also cuddle with the other cats as much as you want." The sirens hastily nod their heads in agreement.

"This will be easy money. Maybe the band can shoot for stardom."


Japan is backstage with his friend Greece. He readies his video camera as Greece talks. "I need you to record my band's performance. I want them to rise to international fame." Greece's band has become popular with his citizens in recent days. He wants to increase his money income with a larger audience.

Three women are chattering to each other a few feet from them. "Are they the band members?" Greece replies that they are.

"What instruments do they play?" Japan is curious. It's two minutes before show time and he doesn't see them carrying any instruments. Surely it's in a case nearby somewhere.

Greece calmly says, "They're singing."

"B-But if you only have singers, wouldn't your group be considered a choir instead?"

Greece picks up a cat holding a tambourine. "No, we're a band. See, he's playing an instrument."

The Greek pets the cat's head. "I prefer the title band. It makes more money. Too bad it's not an all male band. We could've become a boy band and earn even more money." Japan drops the conversation. He's not going to push it and trample Greece's logic. It would be impolite to do so. Besides, it's time for the band to go onstage now.

One of the singers comes up to Greece. "Is it alright we change the song? We found a cool new song on YouTube earlier today and we thought it's amazing."

Greece says, "It's alright. You're the ones singing, not me."

The woman gets really excited. "Don't worry. You won't regret it." She leaves them and follows her other sisters to the stage. Greece follows her with the cat in his arms.

Japan asks, "You're going too? I thought you were the manager?"

Greece scratches behind the cat's ear. "He gets stage fright without me."

The women get into positions and face the cheering crowd, which the majority are men. Greece is lying on the floor with the cat on his stomach. The cat is clawing at the tambourine. Japan hits the record button and waits for the performance to start.

The women say in unison into the microphone, "We're going to sing a new song a girl on YouTube made."

The sirens grin as they put their hands on their hips. "Seven a.m., waking up in the morning, gotta be fresh, gotta go downstairs, gotta have my bowl, gotta have cereal~" The cat lazily pats the tambourine. Greece continues petting the cat.

Japan winces at the song. His hand touches his ear. A while ago, Greece provided him some special earmuffs coated in beeswax. "It's not working. I can still hear them." He wants to take them off, but Greece made him promise not to do so when the women are singing.

Shouts coming from the crowd alert him. Japan focuses his camera on the crowd to see them parting for someone. Turkey walks up to the stage and climbs onto it. His clothes are ruffled and the stench on him is unbearable. Japan resists the urge to cover his nose.

Turkey slaps the microphone and sends it flying into the air. "I am saving everyone from horrible music. It can't let it become a musical sensation! Not on my watch."

Greece yawns, "Security." The security force made up of cats swarm Turkey. They jump him and tear at his clothes.

Turkey screams as he falls off the stage. "Greece, you cheater!" The crowd catches him. Turkey crowd surfs with the cats biting and scratching at him. The band ignores Turkey's screaming for help in favor of continuing the song.

Japan feels conflicted on what to do. "I want to help Turkey, but I have to record the performance."

After some thinking, he decides to tend to Turkey's injuries as soon as they stop singing.


A few hours after Japan's video of the performance goes viral on YouTube….

America puts the volume on his computer to the maximum. He sings off tune with the music. "It's Friday, Friday. Gotta get down on Friday~"

"TURN OFF THE BLOODY MUSIC, YOU GIT!"

"Nah ah Iggy. This music is awesome."

"Don't call me that and The Beatles are better! You have no taste in music just like with your food."

"You can't appreciate people getting their fifteen minutes of fame on YouTube."

"No one can forget something like this no matter how much they drink."

There's silence for a few moments. "Don't drink! I don't want to be stuck here until you're sober again. I have to leave soon."

Frugal money scheme: Success.


Sirens are in Greek mythology. Beeswax was your only defense against them. You put them in your ears so you can't hear them singing.

I didn't want to wait until Friday to update this so I did it today. :) I had to do the infamous Friday song. Poor Turkey tried to save us all. XD

The swim trunk man sang the poetic version, by Rudyard Kipling, of the national Anthem of Greece. I was surprised that there are different versions of the Greek national Anthem.

I have a surprise announcement to make. I'm thinking of making a side fic to this. The reason I won't put those chapters in the same fic is to prevent possible confusion and to keep the flow of the original schemes.

It will have deleted scenes: Romano's birthday party scheme, Turkey's adventure to Greece's concert, Belarus' other victims in her teddy bear schemes, Russia's car crash scheme on England (Which I cut out. It's not in the final version of his scheme.), etc.

So, would anyone be interested to reading them? I'd like to hear some feedback in the reviews.