"Make sure you watch how much you're spending." Carlisle tells me as he counts out bills in front of Emmett and I. Pongo lays at my feet, worn out from playing in the garage. If Carlisle still had the Mercedes, Pongo and I would have never been allowed to go in there to play. It works perfectly, though. Pongo gets to run around in circles and I can throw him tennis balls and wear him out. Esme will be thankful for it, too, because Emmett and I are going Christmas shopping today and Pongo is so tired he will probably just fall asleep in his crate. "Make sure to get gifts for everyone. You have about thirty dollars per person."
"Dad, we know." Emmett promises. "Just give him the cash and let us go."
"Do not lose this, Jasper." He tells me as he pushes the stack of $180 towards me. He wrinkles his brow. "Do you have a wallet?"
I reach in my back pocket and pull out an old Velcro wallet with the Tasmanian devil on it. Emmett snickers at it, and Carlisle shakes his head.
"Come with me, buddy." He tells me, and rolls towards his bedroom. I follow right behind him, Pongo stays right next to me, and we go to his closet. He heads straight for a stack of drawers. "You need a man's wallet, not a boy's wallet."
He pulls open the drawer and backs out of my way. There are wallets, watches, rings, all kinds of little odds and ends.
"Pick out a wallet." He tells me. My eyes instantly fall on a black bifold wallet. I open it up and run my finger over all the slots for cards. There's a clear slot where you would put a license, but instead, it's a picture of Carlisle and Esme on their wedding day. Esme has a simple white dress on. The top half has some simple lace along the neckline. Carlisle's wearing a grey suit with a light blue vest and tie. They're standing in front of a large tree covered in tons of white lights. Carlisle is dipping Esme, one hand on her hip and one hand wrapped around her back, and is kissing her. She has a bouquet in one hand and the other is draped around Carlisle's shoulders.
"Can I keep this?" I ask, holding it out for Carlisle to see. He smiles at the picture.
"Sure, buddy."
We leave the bedroom and return to the office. Emmett dramatically rolls his eyes as if he's been waiting forever. I grab the money and my ID from the old wallet and put it in my new wallet. Carlisle tells us to have fun shopping, and we leave the room. I point to Pongo's crate, but he doesn't go in like he's supposed to.
"Crate, Pongo." I say. He just stairs at me. I sigh, take his collar, and lead him over to the crate. Once he's locked it, he lays down and I drop a treat in front of him.
"Seriously, Jasper, let's go!" Emmett calls. I sigh, say goodbye to Pongo, and hurry to the door before Emmett leaves me here.
"What store do you want to hit first?" Emmett asks me as we weave through the crowded mall. I shrug, but Emmett is leading the way and can't see it.
There's only a week until Christmas. I should have known that the mall would be this packed, but I didn't even think about it. I try not to think about how crowded I am or how people keep bumping into me. Instead, I focus on the back of Emmett's head and keeping up with him. I can't wait for Pongo to be ready to come out with me in public.
Emmett cuts through the crowd and slides into a store front. I follow him in, thankful to be out of the big crowd. The store is pretty busy, but not packed like the aisles through the mall are.
"Look," Emmett points towards a big cardboard sign at the entry way. It reads: All tee-shirts, 2 for $35. "If you want to get Rosalie some shirts I'll spot you the extra five bucks and the tax."
I nod. Sounds good to me.
We wonder through the store. Emmett and I dig through sale racks and find a few things in Rosalie's size. Emmett finds a black sweatshirt with little red roses printed on it. I find two tee shirts, one with blue stripes and another with the phrase "messy hair don't care" printed on it. I give Emmet the shirts and thirty dollars, and he takes it up to the register. I wonder around the store as he waits in line. I go to the men's section where there's less people. They have wallets on sale too, but I like the one Carlisle gave me better. A little farther down is a rack full of men's socks, boxers and ties. I wonder down that way, grabbing a few different articles to feel the texture of the material.
Carlisle has plenty of ties, and he buys me all of my socks and underwear, so there's no reason for me to take anything. It's strange, though. I feel a twinge in my stomach. I look over my shoulder. No one is watching me.
I take a tie off of the rack. It's soft, made from cotton. The design is so ugly, though. I'm no fashionista, but even I know the red and green checkered tie with little pictures of Santa Claus in the boxes is tacky. My fingers seem to work on their own, though. As I look over the bad design, my fingers go up to the little hanger it's attached to. It doesn't take much effort to snap the thin plastic barb that holds the tie to the hanger. I drop the hanger, and reach for other tie with my left hand as I use my right hand to push the tie into my pants. Once it's completely hidden, I turn around and wonder to another part of the store. I spot a mirror handing on the wall and pause by it. Other than my junk looking a little bugger, it's not obvious that I've hid it.
"Ready, bro?" Emmett asks as he strolls towards me. I nod and we head back out.
We go back into the madness of the main aisle. I keep close to Emmett so we don't get separated, and we duck into another store. It's an entertainment store.
"This is Edward's favorite store. I always get his gifts from here." Emmett tells me.
There's so many different things in this store. Everything from CD's and DVD's to posters and games and sheet music. There's little nicknacks from different movies and TV shows. Emmett goes right over to the CD's while I wonder the perimeter of the store. My fingers twitch and tap against my leg. I scan every item I see, debating on if it would be a good gift for Edward, but I can't focus well.
There are little plush characters hanging on a keychain. They're small, only about two inches long. I grab three and hold them on my index finger by the round ring. I glance down at the bag in my hand from the last store. All I have to do is just barely tilt my finger downward to let the first keychain fall right into my bag. Before the other two can fall in, I look closely at the little characters before putting them back on the rack.
No one will ever know.
I keep looking around. Half of my attention is on looking for a gift for Edward, and half is used to spot for something I can sneak away.
I find a big box full of mind games in it. It has twelve metal puzzles where two pieces are connected and you have to find a way to disconnect them. I'm sure Edward will like this, so I tuck it under my arm and wonder towards Emmett. He has three CD's in his hand.
"You find something for him?" Emmett asks. I nod and show him the box of mind games. "He'll love that. He's such a nerd."
Emmett takes the CD's towards the register, but pauses at a display of earbuds. He mentions how Edward has been on a rampage about his missing earbuds and grabs a package off of the rack.
We hurry to the next store- a greeting card store with all kinds of feel-good gifts. Coffee mugs, wooden signs, necklaces. There's all kinds of cheesy little gifts. Emmett and I split up again. There are wooden figures, much like the Santa Pongo chewed up. Almost all of them are figures of adults with kids. A man and a woman holding a baby, a man with a little boy on his shoulders, a little girl and a man dancing. There's one that really catches my eye. It's a man and woman standing next to each other and two young blond kids, a boy and a girl, standing in front of them. I grab the figure and look at the price tag on the bottom. $49.99 for it. I carefully set it back down and go to a different shelf.
On a black velvet stand is a display of necklaces. They're all different shapes and styles. I find one that is a silver heart with the word "Mom" written inside. I look at the little tag on the beaded chain. $24.99. That's more doable. I take it off the display and hold it in the palm of my hand. Before leaving that shelf, though, I grab one more necklace. It's another silver one, but this one is an oval and has "Godmother" etched into the charm. I hold that one in my other hand, and as I walk away, I slide it into my pocket.
There's a whole wall full of cups. Some are overly decorated wine classes, some have collectible characters on them. Most are pretty girly, but I find a white travel coffee mug with "World's greatest father" printed on it in big, bold letters. It will be perfect for when Carlisle goes back to work, and the sign says it's on sale for $14.99, to I take it off the shelf.
I glance around the store, eyeing the walls and the ceiling. Unlike the other stores, this one doesn't have a single camera.
I don't even have to think about what I'm doing. My hands seem to work separately from my brain as they grab little things to stuff in my bag. A kid's birthday card, a tiny notebook, a few rubber bracelets, a set of plastic coasters. It's so easy when cameras aren't watching.
"Hey, Jasper! What do you think about this?"
Emmett's voice pulls my attention away from my treasures. He walks over to me and hands me a business card. On the front is an advertisement for twenty percent off a locket-type necklace when you buy three charms to go inside of it.
"There's a case over there that has all of the charms. I don't know which Mom would like best. Come help me pick."
I follow him across the store to a wooden table-like case with glass over it. It has multiple tiny square cubicles in it that hold all kinds of little charms that are smaller than the nail on my little finger.
"I'm torn between getting everyone's birthstones, or one of the shaped charms. There's the rose for Rosalie, the paw print for you and Pongo, the music note for Edward, the stethoscope for Dad." Emmett says, pointing to the corresponding cubicle for the charm he is describing. "That would be more personable, but birthstones would be classier. What's December's birthstone?"
I point to the turquoise charms.
"What do you think? Shapes or birthstones?"
I tap the glass over the birthstone section.
"Good choice. I'll get the cashier to open the case."
Emmett finds a free cashier who comes to open the case. He picks out all the birthstone colors for our family and a heart shaped locket. It's on a silver chain and the frame of the heart is the same silver with small rhinestones along it, and a clear center so the charms can be seen. The cashier pops the heart open and places the charms in and puts it in a little velvet bag. Emmett and I head to the registers, pay for what's in our hands, and head back out into the aisles.
Emmett and I hit up a book store, another woman's clothing store, a fancy men's accessories store, and a hobby store. I buy Alice a pink silk shirt, but pocket a plastic bookmark, a set of mini gel pens, a cheap tie clip, a small bag of buttons, and a little box of chalk. Emmett doesn't expect a thing, and neither do any of the stores. It's so simple to hide things when you're already carrying bags from other stores. Just drop it in a bag and no one sees it. I hid the tie clip in my pocket, hidden behind my phone. It's so easy.
Emmett finally decides on a gift for Carlisle, a set of small picture frames for his office, and we finally get to go home.
I don't have much experience wrapping presents. Esme gave me a whole roll of shimmery silver paper that she swears will reflect the lights on the tree beautifully. I'm sure she's right, but I also hope she has more paper. Edward's gift was easy to wrap, but everyone else's was a struggle. I had to redo almost all of them.
"Here, Pongo." I say as I crumple up another patch of ruined paper. I toss it at him and he instantly pounces on it. He has six other balls of paper around him that he's been playing with. I unroll more paper, cut a piece, and try to figure out how I'm supposed to wrap a travel mug when I hear a knock on the door. Pongo barks at the door, and I quickly push the presents under my bed. "One second!"
"Jasper, we need to talk." Carlisle's stern voice says. "Now."
Shit. He only sounds like that when someone is in trouble. I run through all the possibilities of what I could have done wrong. No one has been fighting or arguing and I've followed all the rules. Maybe something happened to some of the other family members. I jump up and hurry to the door.
Carlisle is standing in the hallway, a angry scowl on his face and his brows scrunched together. I wish that was the only scary thing in the hallway, though.
Bella's father, Chief Charlie Swan, stands next to Carlisle in full uniform, complete with handcuffs and a gun on his waist. He crosses his arms over his chest.
My mind starts racing. Why would he be here? Esme met a friend for dinner and coffee this afternoon. Did something happen to her? Maybe Charlie caught Edward and Bella screwing around with each other and they want to know if I know anything about it. Pongo charges over to me and starts nudging my hand with his nose until I pet his head.
"What did you take from the mall?" Carlisle asks me.
Oh shit.
I try to hide any sign of guilt, but I can't help but panic a little. My eyes grow wide and I can feel my cheeks turning red. I shake my head no.
"Don't lie to me, Jasper." Carlisle warns.
"An employee saw you stuffing products into a bag from another store." Charlie explains. "They followed you and Emmett to the parking lot to get a vehicle description."
"You told us you wouldn't steal anymore." Carlisle sighs. "What did you do with the products?"
I don't respond. There isn't anything I can say or do to really get out of this.
"Do you realize you could be sent to Boysville for this? If you get sent to Boysville then that could jeopardize your adoption!" Carlisle says sharply.
That really gets me panicking. My heart rate races, my breathing gets shallower. I can feel my throats getting tight. I didn't think anyone saw me. I looked for cameras and employees. How did I get caught? I didn't realize it could ruin my adoption.
"If you hand over the items you took, I may be able to convince the store to not press charges." Charlie tells me.
"Show us what you too, Jasper." Carlisle demands.
I nod and walk over to my nightstand. My hands shake. Pongo stays right by my side. I open the drawer while keeping my back to the door but I can hear Carlisle and Charlie coming closer. I grab the tie, the bookmark, the gel pens, and the plush keychain. I lay them out on my bed for Carlisle and Charlie to see.
"Is that all?" Carlisle ask. I shake my head no, and grab the four rubber bracelets, the box of chalk, and the kid's birthday card and line them up with the rest of my treasures.
"Damn, boy," Charlie sighs. "How much did you take?"
I look at Carlisle. My mouth is so dry that my lips want to stick together. My tight throw feels even tighter. Carlisle nods towards the drawer.
"How much is in there?" He asks me.
I pull the drawer out as far is it can go. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've worked so hard at growing my treasures and not getting caught. I grab both sides of the drawer and give it a little shake until it comes out of the nightstand completely. Hesitating, I stare down into it at all the things I have. I never gave those glass figures to Rosie like I wanted to. I can't risk being put in juvie and screwing up my adoption.
"Jasper Lee," Carlisle says in a grave voice. I turn around and slowly set my drawer on my bed. Carlisle hobbled over to it as I sit next to my lined up ill-gotten goods. I lean forward with my elbows on my knees, my head in my hands and staring at the ground. Pongo lays on top of my feet. "Jasper, what the hell is this? Did you take all of this?"
I pierce my lips together. I don't want to tell him.
"Did you take all of this?" He repeats. "Answer me, son."
I reluctantly nod.
"Oh my god." Carlisle sighs. I keep my head ducked down. Either Carlisle or Charlie start rustling through my things.
"It was the craft store that called. This isn't all from the craft store." Charlie murmurs.
"This is from the pharmacy," Carlisle says. "And these are from the hospital. Jasper, did you steal from hospital gift shop?"
I force another nod without looking at him.
"What do you have to do about this?" Carlisle asks Charlie. The disappointment in his voice is undeniable.
"Should we talk in the hall?" Charlie suggests.
"Yes, of course."
They leave my room, shutting the door behind them. I lift my head and look over at all the things I've collected. Charlie and Carlisle have laid out even more things on my bed. I grab the drawer. It's still over halfway full. There are things from almost all the stores I've gone to. There's Emmett's coffee reward card, Edward's headphones, the little nameplate I took from Carlisle's office.
I don't want to go to Boysville. It is the worst place for someone like me. When I was thirteen they sent me to Boysville and Rosalie to a girls group home for a week because there wasn't a foster home ready for us. Rosalie got the better end of the deal at a group home. At least there she got her own bedroom and got to stay in a house. Boysville is a juvenile delinquent center, but when they can't find a home for foster kids, they dump us there. I had to stay in a room with a boy who was arrested for beating his little sister to the point that she had to be in the hospital. They call them rooms, but it's a cell. There aren't any windows except for on the big metal door, and the concrete block walls are painted this dull, ugly beige. We had to go to group therapy together, eat together, go outside in the gated yard with barbed wire along the top of the fence together. Needless to say, it is not a good place for a kid who doesn't talk.
I can't go back.
My door opens and I quickly set the drawer back down. Charlie walks a beeline towards me. Carlisle takes a set to the side, staying close to the wall.
"Jasper, stand up, turn around, and put your hands behind your back." Charlie tells me. He grabs his handcuffs from his side.
My jaw drops. I look over at Carlisle. He keeps his jaw set, but won't look me in the eye. I try to blink back tears, but it isn't working. With one last pleading look to Carlisle, I do what Charlie told me. He holds my arms and cuffs my wrists.
"Let's go." Charlie says. He grabs my elbow and walks with me to the door. Pongo whines as he walks next to me. Carlisle grabs his collar and tries to hold him in the room, but Pongo keeps trying to pull away from him.
"Hey, someone help me with this damn dog!" Carlisle calls down the hall. I keep walking, but look over my shoulder. Rosalie's bedroom door flings open and she comes out in sweatpants and a tee shirt. The moment she sees me she starts to panic. She runs over to Carlisle.
"What's going on, Carlisle? Where is he taking Jasper?" She asks, her voice spewing out rapidly. "He can't go back to Boysville!"
"Rose, relax," Carlisle sighs. "Grab this dog. Keep him in Jasper's room."
"Jasper!" Rosalie calls for me. She tries to rush towards me, but Carlisle sticks his crutch out to stop her.
"Rosalie Lillian, listen to me." He says firmly. "Lock the dog in his room and I will explain it all."
"You can't let this happen!" Rosalie cries.
"Rosalie!" Carlisle says so loudly it's borderline yelling. It catches Rose's attention, though. "Relax. Get the dog in the room and I'll explain everything."
She gives me one more look and I mouth "I'm okay" to her. She nods, grabs Pongo and leads him back to my room.
"Watch your step." Charlie tells me as we reach the stairs. I look down at me feet as we head to the lower. Emmett and Edward are lounging on the living room couch. They stare at me with wide eyes, neither one really knowing what to do. I turn my head so they don't see the tears that are starting to fall.
Charlie doesn't even let me stop to put my shoes on. When we get to the door, I reach my leg out to slide my shoes over to me so I could put them on as well as I could without my hands, but Charlie doesn't wait and just yanks me outside. I can hear Emmett calling for Carlisle before the door closes behind us. Charlie drags me through the snow to the patrol car waiting in the driveway. My socks and the bottom of my jeans are soaked from the snow. Charlie opens the back seat and pushes my head down as I get in. He slams the door shut, gets in the front seat, and starts the car. I lean my head back and close my eyes. My tears flow down my cheeks. The car revs to life, and I hear Charlie get out of the car and slam his door. I open my eyes again to watch him go back to the house.
I don't even try to hide my tears now. I just let them flow like water from a faucet. I screwed everything up. Rose and I have it made here, and now I've ruined it. Carlisle and Esme wanted us, they wanted me.
Jeopardize your adoption. Carlisle's words rattle around my brain. Will they still adopt Rose? Where will I go? Hopefully they keep me close so I can still see Rosalie and the Cullen's and Alice. Oh god, Alice. What will she think of me now?
No one likes a boy who can't talk and is dependent on his sister, but somehow I got lucky at this home. The whole family accepted me. Alice accepted me. But now with another black mark on my record, I probably won't find that again.
My phone vibrates in my pocket three times to tell me there's a text message. It could be my dad, or maybe Rose or Emmett or Edward asking what's going on, or maybe Alice. My hands are still cuffed behind my back so I can't check.
A car pulls into the driveway. I look over my shoulder and see Esme's car coming towards the house. She slowly passes the cop car, and when she sees me in the back, her jaw drops. Once the car is parked in the garage, she gets out and comes over to me. She doesn't try to open the door, but instead talks through the window.
"Jasper, what's going on?" She questions me. My lip quivers as I look into her concerned eyes. I look away. The disappointment on her face is too much to handle.
It only takes a second for Esme to leave the car and hustle to the door. I do my best to wipe my tears off my cheek with my shoulder, but they're quickly replaced. I just ruined everything. I never thought the end of my stay with the Cullen's would be crying like a baby in the back of a police car with cold, wet socks and my hands cuffed behind my back.
It's been about twenty or thirty minutes that I've been sitting in this car. The heat is turned up, but my toes are still cold. I'm sure my cheeks are red and stained from crying, but I really don't care. How am I not supposed to cry in a situation like this? I keep my head down and stare at my feet. I curl my toes over and over again, hoping the movement will help warm me up.
It isn't the first time I've been in the back of a cop car. I rode in one to Boysville, and they dropped me off at our new foster home in one. It is the first time being back here for being in trouble, though.
"Get out, Cullen."
Charlie's voice startles me, and is paired with him yanking the car door open. I furrow my brow and look up at him. Get out? And Cullen?
Legally, I'm still a Whitlock. But the Cullen name has a really nice ring to it.
"Are you gonna get out or am I going to have to take you to the station?" Charlie grumbles.
He doesn't have to ask me twice. I fling my legs out of the car. The light layer of snow on the driveway is freezing cold on the soles of my feet, but is so much better than in the back of a cop car. Charlie grabs me by the elbow again, slams the door behind me, and guides me back to the house.
Emmett, Edward, and Rosalie are all sitting in the living room when Charlie walks me to the stairs. Pongo is locked in his crate, whining. Edward doesn't look at me, but Rosalie and Emmett do. Rosie let's out a big sigh of relief. Emmett stares at me. He must have been told that I took the coffee shop reward card from his wallet. I look away from him and down at the stairs. I leave behind a wet footprint with every step I take on the white carpet. Esme won't be happy about that.
Charlie takes me back to my bedroom. Esme and Carlisle are both there. I duck my head and look at them through my eyelashes, trying to look as remorseful as possible. Esme crosses her hands over her chest and turns her attention to all the items laid out on my bed. Everything from my drawer is neatly arranged in a big square. Charlie yanks on my shoulder so I'm facing the bedroom wall.
"I'm going to take these cuffs off and you're going to place your hands on the wall and spread your legs shoulder length apart." Charlie instructs gruffly as he stands behind me. It only takes a second for the cuffs to come off. I instantly pull my hands back in front of me and rub my wrists.
"On the wall, now!" Charlie yells. I jolt a little, and instantly smack my palms against the wall and spread my legs out just like he instructed. "Do you have any stolen items on you?"
I shake my head no. Charlie pats me down like a criminal, feeling my arms, sides, and legs. Once he's done, he grabs my arm again and leads me to where Esme and Carlisle are standing near my bed.
"Shoplifting can range from a misdemeanor to a felony. At sixteen you can be tried as an adult and can face a maximum of five years in jail and over ten thousand dollars' worth of fines." Charlie says. "Are you prepared to face that?"
I shake my head no, tears still falling.
"Are you ready to say goodbye to your parents and spend the next five years in jail?"
I shake my head no again. My fingers shake and my throat feels like there's a hand clenching it.
"Listen up, boy," Charlie says. He cups his hand under my chin and forces me to look him in the eye. When I try to pull away, he just tightens his grip. My eyes get wide and I try to gulp down a big lump in my throat. "The Cullen's don't raise criminals. You're damn lucky to have parents who are so highly respected. They are the only ones keeping you from jail tonight. And you can forget about Boysville. You're sixteen. You'll be going to jail for a charge that big. Understand?"
I nod furiously. He drops his hand from my chin and gives me one last mean look.
"Straighten up, Cullen." Charlie tells me before turning around and leaving my room. He closes the door behind him and suddenly I'm left alone with something that isn't nearly as scary as the thought of being sent away, but still terrifying in its own way.
I'm left alone with Carlisle and Esme and the saddest, angriest, most disappointed looks I've ever seen. Esme sighs heavily.
"Don't ever scare me like that again, Jasper." Esme tells me. Her voice is firm. "You have no idea how terrifying it is to see your child in a cop car."
"What is the meaning behind all of this?" Carlisle asks, gesturing to all the things on my bed. The things I took from the mall are gone. "What do you have to say for yourself?"
I just look down at my feet.
"Get out of those wet socks before you get a cold." Esme tells me. I do as she says and toss them into my hamper.
"Tell me about these, Jasper." Carlisle orders. I keep my head down.
"Jasper, come here." Esme says. Her tone is a little calmer this time. She pulls me into a hug and squeezes me tightly.
I wrap my arms around her and hold her just as tightly.
"I thought I was being taken away." I admit in a quiet voice.
"You're not going anywhere tonight, buddy." Carlisle promises.
Esme pulls away and kisses my forehead. She wipes my wet cheeks with her thumb, but she puts on a firm face.
"Sit, young man. We need to talk about this."
I drop my head again and plop down on a clear spot on my bed. From the look on Carlisle's face, I know I'm in for lecture of a lifetime.
Rosalie and I have been in almost every kind of foster homes. We've been ignored and beat, and we've been carefully watched and hounded on. One home we were in for about two months was run by the father and his adult son. The mother didn't do any of the punishing. She just cooked and cleaned. Whenever we acted out, either the father or the son would give us a smack or two on the back of our heads, our faces, our hands, or our butts. There wasn't any talking about bad behavior or why it was wrong or time outs or groundings. Just a few moments of discomfort. Rosie and I were nine when we were in that home, and I hated it. I got smacked a lot, and it use to make me so angry, but now I wish Carlisle would just smack me across the face and leave my punishment at that. Carlisle and Esme's lecture is long and boarder line torturous. The disappointment on their face kills me.
"And you stole from your own brothers? You violated the trust of the two boys who will always be there for you." Carlisle lectures. He's trying hard to keep his voice even and low, but it's obviously a struggle for him to keep from yelling at me. He grabs the little plaque from my bed. "You took this from my office. It is a privilege to be able to spend time in that office. A privilege you no longer have!"
"You know we buy you everything you need and plenty of things that you want." Esme says, taking over the talk. "Do you realize how much we just spent for that dog? You have absolutely no reason to be stealing anything!"
They've been going strong for about fifteen minutes now. At this rate I would have rather Carlisle just slap me once and call it a day instead of this talking to. I thought that since Esme stuck around for the lecture that it would be a good-cop-bad-cop type of situation, but I was wrong. It's all around bad cop. They really know how to lay the guilt on thick.
"What are we supposed to do with you, Jasper?" Carlisle sighs. "We obviously can't trust you!"
I wipe my teary eyes and fix them on Carlisle's slippers.
"You still gonna adopt me?" I whimper.
"What did you say? Repeat yourself, Jasper." Esme demands.
"Are you still gonna adopt me?" I ask again.
They both get very quiet. A few seconds pass before I lift my head and look at them. All of the anger has melted from their face. Carlisle's jaw relaxes and Esme's eyes return to their typical soft look. Esme pushes my treasures away from me and sits next to me. Carlisle hobbles over and does the same on my other side.
"Jasper Lee, we would never give you up, understand?" Esme asks. She wraps her arm around my shoulders. "You are a part of this family even when you do something wrong."
"This isn't a goodbye speech." Carlisle tells me. He puts his hand over Esme's. I can feel his fingertips just past hers. "This is simply an issue that needs to be addressed."
I give a slight nod. I gather enough courage to look them in the eye, but once I see Esme, I lose it all. Her eyes are welling up with tears now. Seeing her cry makes me cry even harder, which feels almost impossible. I'm shocked I have any tears left.
"I love you, Jazz." She says. "Nothing will change that."
"That's for both of us, buddy." Carlisle says.
"I love you guys, too." I murmur through sobs. Esme pulls me into a hug again.
"Jasper, what made you choose this stuff?" Carlisle asks slowly. I pull away from Esme and shrug. "If you ever want to earn our trust back, you need to answer our questions. Now tell me, what made you choose this stuff?"
"I dunno." I admit quietly.
"Jasper," Carlisle warns.
"I really don't know." I quickly defend myself.
"Do you like these items?"
"Yeah."
Carlisle looks over at all the things spread across my bed. He picks up Emmett's coffee reward card.
"You like this?" He asks, holding it up for me to see. I shrug.
Carlisle twirls the card between his fingers, staring intently at it. He sets it back down and pulls his cellphone out of his pocket.
"Carlisle, what are you doing?" Esme hisses at him. "Put your phone away!"
"Hang on." Carlisle tells her. He taps on the screen, and starts asking me all these questions. "Do these items offer you any monetary value?"
"I don't know what that means." I say.
"Are these items valuable? Can you get money from them?" He explains. I shake my head no. "Is it a reoccurring urge to steal that you cannot resist?"
I shrug.
"Do you feel tense before you steal?"
I initially want to say no, but I think back to the mall.
"I was tense today, but because of the crowds." I explain.
"What about the other times? I were you tense then?"
My mind wonders to the hospital gift shop, the pharmacy, and all the other stores.
"Yeah."
"Do you feel pleasure, relief, or gratification during the act of stealing?"
I nod, but Carlisle is staring at his phone screen.
"Yes." I say out loud. For the millionth time today, my throat tightens. What is he reading?
"Do you steal because you are angry or looking for revenge?"
"No."
"Carlisle, what is this about?" Esme asks.
Carlisle passes the phone over to Esme. Her face falls as she reads the screen. I lean over to take a look at it myself. Carlisle pats my arm, gaining my attention.
"Have you talked to your therapist about this?" He asks me. I shake my head no. "Why not?"
"I, I don't talk to my therapist." I say. Carlisle let's out a big, heavy sigh and pinches the bridge of his nose.
"I've been sending you there once a week since you've got here, and you haven't been talking to him?"
I shake my head no again.
"I don't like him." I whisper.
"Listen, you need to talk to someone about this. Let me make an appointment at my therapist. Will you talk to my therapist if I come with you?"
I shrug. I didn't know Carlisle had a therapist.
"Let's just try it, okay?" He compromises.
I don't really know if that is a good idea or not, so instead of answering, I peer back over at Carlisle's phone. In big blue letters at the top of the screen reads "Symptoms of Kleptomania".
"Do you think I'm a-"
"I'm not a psychologist, Jasper." He defends himself after cutting me off. He puts his arm around me, pulls me closer to him, and kisses my temple.
"Carlisle," Esme says. "We should talk."
"I agree. Jasper, you're grounded until further notice. You are to stay in your room for the rest of the night. Understand?"
I nod.
"Give me your phone." Carlisle orders and holds his hand out. I pierce my lips together, pull my phone out of my pocket and pray that he doesn't look through it. Esme packs all of my treasures in my drawer and she takes it with her once she and Carlisle leave my room. They shut the door firmly behind them, but I can hear them in the hallway.
"He shows all the symptoms, love." Carlisle says.
"My baby isn't a kleptomaniac." Esme defends me.
I can't hear the rest of their conversation, just their footsteps down the hallway.
I've been stuck upstairs all night. Esme brought me dinner up around six o'clock, and Rosalie snuck in for about ten minutes to talk to me before Esme came up and shooed her out. I could hear my dog barking all afternoon. It's weird. When I first got here, being all alone in my room was a good thing. Now, all I want is to go downstairs and be a part of the family.
Everyone else has gone to bed by now. I can tell who is in the hallway by their footsteps. Emmett stomps through like a heard of elephants, Rosalie's steps are light, and Edward's strides are faster than anyone else's. They have all gone to their bedrooms. I'm assuming it's about ten thirty or eleven. I can't sleep. I don't want to be in here anymore.
I debate how much trouble I would be in if I leave my room. If I were in trouble for back talking or not doing what I was told I wouldn't risk it, but I'm already in deep enough. I leave my bed, grab my pillow and blanket, and head downstairs.
All the lights are turned off on the lower level except for Carlisle and Esme's bedroom. Their door is shut and the light that beams out from under the door. I tiptoe over. Pongo must be sleeping because he isn't whining or barking anymore. As I get closer to their bedroom, I can hear Esme and Carlisle arguing.
"He just needs to be properly taught and it will stop. You are making this into a bigger deal than it is!" Esme huffs.
"Why are you so afraid of labels? He fits right in with the rest of us! Edward's depression, Emmett's ADHD, Rose's and Jasper's codependency, my anger issues, your anxiety. We all have labels in this house!" Carlisle damn near shouts back.
"You always want to bring that up! How many times have we talked about this? Emmett is not his ADHD, Edward is not his depression. They are not their labels so why do you insist on giving it to them?"
"How are they supposed to get help without a label, Esme!"
"Jasper has been through enough in his life. What do you think another label will do to him?"
"It won't do anything for him, but it will let us know how to help him! What do you think I do at the hospital? Not run tests? Not give a label? Just love the sickness away?"
"My kids aren't sick, Carlisle, and you know damn well a physical illness is different than what we're talking about! He already has the label of selective mutism. What do you think "kleptomaniac" is going to do for his self-esteem?"
I quickly knock on the door and they both go completely silent. A few seconds pass and I can hear Carlisle walking towards the door. He opens it up, and I have to squint from the light.
"Jasper," he says calmly. "What do you need?"
"Can I sleep in here?" I ask meekly. Carlisle turns to Esme.
"Of course you can, sweetie." Esme answers. Carlisle steps out of the doorway to let me in. Esme. Comes over, puts her hands on the side of my face and kisses my forehead. "We were just getting ready to go to sleep."
Esme turns to her dresser, grabs pajamas, and disappears into the master bathroom. I look over at Carlisle for more reassurance before making my bed on the floor.
"Just for tonight, son." He tells me. I nod.
Carlisle is already dressed for bed and settles down on his side of the bed. I put my pillow and blanket down before laying down myself.
"Dad?" I murmur.
"Yeah?"
"Charlie called me a Cullen."
"Of course he did. Just because it's not legal yet doesn't mean you're not a Cullen."
"I liked that." I admit. "And I like when you call me son."
"I like when you call me Dad."
Esme comes out of the bathroom, turns the lights out, wishes us goodnight, and climbs into bed. The tension rises once she comes back in the room. A few moments pass before I finally get the guts enough to try to fix it.
"Mom? Dad?" I say into the dark. "I'm sorry I mess up so much."
