Cold Summer Heat Chapter 28

I don't own R and I.

Jane could feel Maura's grip on her forearms tighten, pulling her from the tranquil peacefulness that kissing Maura had provided. Jane knew the kiss couldn't last forever, but she wanted to believe that this particular feeling could.

"What's wrong?" Jane could see the troubled expression on Maura's face as she pulled away. While she was concerned about what she was seeing, she was so very thankful to be able to see at all. Jane carefully pulled her arms from Maura's grasp, only to then reach for her hands.

"I can't believe this is happening. I can't believe that you're okay and that I'm okay and that…" Maura was having a hard time focusing on Jane's face as she talked, looking everywhere but into her friend's eyes.

"You're not okay, are you, Maura?" Jane lied her head back against the pillows, choosing to ignore the slight ache that suggested she was beginning to over do it.

Jane watched as Maura offered a sheepish smile before standing and walking away from the bed. Maura always dressed so nicely and today was no exception despite the fact she was dressed down. Jane could immediately see that Maura had lost weight. She figured it probably wasn't much, but enough to be noticeable. "Maura? Talk to me."

"This is crazy!" Maura whirled around to face Jane, her eyes now completely focused on her. "I should be dead. You should be dead. Frankie. Barry."

Jane watched as Maura wavered slightly on her feet. "Maur, please come sit down." Jane tapped the bed where Maura had just recently vacated. She was pleased and even relieved when Maura obliged.

The silence in the room was deafening, neither woman really wanting to continue the conversation, but both knowing it was important to do just that. Maura had been strong for so long and it was apparent to Jane that she was beginning to break. The scene was enough to fuel the already existent feelings of guilt that continued to torment Jane. Jane closed her eyes just before reaching out, placing her hand onto Maura's face. She didn't need a reminder of how it felt to not be able to see Maura, but she wanted to capture the feeling that particular gesture had given her. She opened her eyes when she felt Maura's tears slide onto her hand.

"Frankie will be fine. Frost will be fine. I will be fine." Jane spoke slowly and clearly hoping Maura would allow her to be strong for her now. "I know you have been worried about me and I'm sorry, Maura. You will never know how sorry I am for all of this."

"Jane…" Maura's efforts were abruptly silenced as Jane moved her finger to her lips.

"You're not doing well, I can see that." Jane smiled then as she slowly wiped the tears from Maura's cheeks. "I can see."

Maura couldn't help but respond to Jane's voice as it smiled along with the recovering detective. She pulled Jane's hand from her face then and grasped it tightly within her own, offering a small smile of her own.

"I can see that you're pushing it, Maura. I can see that you're not taking care of yourself." Jane was quick to prevent Maura from offering her protests. "I know for a fact that taking a bullet hurts like a bitch."

Maura shook her head as she reacted to Jane's way of diffusing the thick conversation. "Although I've never been shot in the chest. Let me see." Jane playfully reached out for Maura's shirt pulling it slightly.

"Jane Rizzoli!" Maura couldn't help but laugh as she slapped Jane's hand. Jane laughed then too, only to wince slightly at the pain that was still a nagging reminder that she wasn't well.

"Maura, please get some rest. I know you're worried about me and I love that about you." Jane quickly grew serious as she focused in on Maura's face. "If you're not okay, then I'll never be."

Maura knew Jane was expecting some response as she refused to let Maura look away. "I will, Jane. Now that I know…" Maura's voice trailed off. She squeezed Jane's hand before once again standing from the bed.

"Don't make me send my mother home with you to make sure you rest." Maura could tell Jane was quickly returning to her old self and that alone slowed her heart down just a bit. Maura was concerned as she could feel the rise in her heart rate, but the last thing she wanted to do was worry Jane.

"Your mother is an exceptional woman." Maura let her thoughts shift briefly to her own mother as she bent to hug Jane goodbye. Jane could feel the slight shaking of Maura's body as her embrace was tighter than what was their norm. Jane forced the memory of when she first found Maura in that hot train building. The relief mixed with fear that accompanied Maura's hug then was not unlike what she was feeling from her now.

Maura was afraid, Jane could sense it. "Well take that exceptional woman home with you. She'll stay here all day and she looks beat as well." Jane didn't want Maura alone right now and who better than her mother to look after her. Maura let go only to lean her forehead against Jane's for a brief moment. And then she was gone and Jane hated the feeling that came with the loss of contact.

"Is Korsak out there? Could you send him in, I really need to talk to him." Jane watched as Maura headed to the door to leave. She then cringed as Maura spun around on her heels, giving Jane a look she wasn't quite sure how to react to.

"Jane Rizzoli! You are not to worry about any of this as a case. It is over. Do you hear me? Over." Frost had filled Maura in on what had Jane so on edge before her body shut down back at her apartment.

"Yes, Dr. Isles." Jane tried not to laugh at how serious Maura was right then. "I just want to see how he is doing. I just want to see him." Jane used her two fingers to point at her eyes and then towards Maura. Maura couldn't refuse Jane's grin as she realized she had over reacted. She smiled despite of herself and reached for the door.

"I'll see if he's available. Rest Detective, Dr's. orders." Maura was then gone leaving Jane to wonder about what she had said earlier. How were they all alive right now?

Jane wanted to see Korsak. He had been there for her for years and never had she missed his presence as she did now. She wanted to see him, needed to thank him. And then she wanted answers. What the hell happened that caused Maura to be shot by one of their own. He knew and she knew he knew. She should drop it, Maura was right, it was over. Jane couldn't just drop it. Another error. Another mistake by her own people. Almost another death because of it. Almost Maura's death. No, she couldn't just drop it.

Jane relaxed back against the pillows on her bed. She was so very tired, but the last thing she wanted was to sleep. She feared closing her eyes, feared not be able to emerge again from the darkness. She scanned the room while her body slowly began to shut down. Never had the inside of plain, boring hospital room looked so good to her. Her mind went to Maura. To seeing Maura, touching her, kissing her. It was crazy. All of it. Everything was moving so fast in a direction she wasn't anywhere near prepared for. Maura scared her. Loving Maura scared her. She was not only the smartest woman she knew, she was proving to be the strongest as well. Jane felt like a child trying to figure out what was going on while Maura blatantly ignored her own health to look out for Jane. She didn't seem to be afraid of these new feelings that were absolutely terrifying to Jane. Maybe they weren't exactly new feelings for Maura. Jane dismissed the thought despite realizing Maura seemed to be taking point on the whole situation and that was more than okay by her. She was by no means a rookie, but Jane sure was green when it came to loving another woman…like this. The feelings scared her, frustrated her in a way she was unfamiliar with.

Jane had finally given in to the fatigue that had been threatening her since before Maura had shown up. Korsak would have to wait. Jane knew he wouldn't mind. She knew he'd already know what she was going to hit him with and would probably be grateful that Jane was physically unable to perform at the moment.

"It seems she doesn't really want to see me after all." Korsak rolled his eyes as he quietly exited Jane's room. He was fairly certain she never knew he was there.

"Maybe she'll be less adamant about this whole thing after a nap." Frost carefully watched Jane through the window to her room. "Why can't she just accept it's over? Benjamin Chase is dead. Bradley is dead."

Korsak pulled Frost by the arm, suggesting they leave Jane to sleep for a while. Neither man spoke as they boarded the elevator. Frost was struggling as his leg was still very weak from his wound, but worked to hide his discomfort from the senior detective. Korsak ordered two coffees and took the closest table once they entered the cafeteria.

"Jane has a lot to process. She's going to be a head case for awhile to say the least." Korsak shook his head before sipping his coffee. He looked up into the almost frightening glare of her now partner.

"Relax, Junior. It's just a figure of speech. Although she would probably say the same thing about herself right now." Korsak took the time to really study Frost. The kid had been impressive throughout this whole ordeal. "Jane wants answers because she wants to be able to punish someone. She can blame Benjamin or Bradley but she can't punish them."

"What good will that do? We all survived." Frost began to sip at his own coffee then thankful that Korsak was willing to talk to him about Jane.

"Her brother. Her partner. Herself. All victims at the hands of a man who only targeted her because of an error on our part back then." Korsak stared hard into Frost's dark eyes making sure the younger detective was following his train of thought. "Maura is on us."

Frost nodded slowly refusing to lose Korsak's gaze. "We could put a name on that bullet. She will do just that eventually."

"She could and she may." Korsak spoke matter of fact. "It was a good shoot and a good operation. It was just unfortunate. All we really had to go on was what we were able to get from your radio."

Frost let his eyes drop to his cup. "It was ugly, real ugly. He was going to kill one or both of them. There was no doubt about that."

"Jane's angry. It really is that simple. She was betrayed by Bradley in the worst way, then controlled by Benjamin. Was so close and still couldn't protect Maura." Korsak couldn't hide the anger that crept into his voice as he spoke. "Her anger really stems from her fear. Maura." Korsak shrugged as he continued to work on his coffee.

"It won't help her to name somebody. It'll probably take Maura to convince her of that though." Frost leaned back in his chair now studying Korsak. "Do you think this thing between Maura and Jane is because of what happened."

Korsak allowed himself to laugh a little, knowing what Frost was alluding to. "You're asking me? I can't explain any of it. All I know is I could barely keep Jane from her when she realized Maura was shot. As bad off as Jane was, she was determined to get to her. You tell me."

"She would do that for any of us. She cares about her family and friends, deeply." Frost let his mind replay how focused Jane was about finding Maura.

"This is true." Korsak leaned in a bit closer so that his tie barely managed to miss falling into his cup. "I didn't see her kiss you like that when she found out you were okay." Korsak laughed at the look on Frost's face. Frost couldn't help but laugh himself. Korsak was old fashioned in a lot of ways, but he believed love was love and that never changed with the times.

Maura's head was jumping from one thing to the next, trying desperately to comprehend and dissect all that she was thinking and feeling. Jane was right, she had been neglecting her own health in favor of Jane's, but she had absolutely no regrets about that. There was no doubt Jane would do the same for her and had. She witnessed the hell Jane went through to save her from Benjamin and Drayson. Maura witness first hand how Jane refused to give up, refused to surrender despite her injuries that were far more serious than any of them realized.

Maura lied down on her bed, hoping she would be able to get the rest her body so desperately was begging for. Jane was going to be okay, that thought alone was enough to allow her to close her eyes against the headache that had formed from seemingly nowhere. She tried to clear her mind of everything except the feel of Jane's arms as they wrapped around her. Jane was so very strong, never afraid to prove that to anyone at any time. She was so very intelligent as well. She knew people; she knew how to read people. Jane could see right through Maura and how she tried to present herself.

Maura didn't bother to try to hide the smile that appeared on her face as she relaxed into her mattress. Jane could see through her even when she couldn't see. She was just that good. Maura's thoughts shifted abruptly to her own body and how tired she suddenly felt. She had just slept nearly ten hours before being summoned to see Jane, she really shouldn't be this tired already. She had been shot recently and like Jane had said taking a bullet hurt like a bitch. Maura smiled to herself at Jane's terminology. That was Jane.

Maura wasn't sure how it really felt to be shot, but she knew what if felt like to recover. Her body ached and her head throbbed. Her chest felt heavy and her breathing shallow. She wondered if she had been feeling this way since she was released from the hospital, just oblivious due to her concern for Jane. Maura tried to diagnose herself but gave up quickly as she felt herself beginning to drift off.

Korsak pulled in directly behind the paramedics. Angela was terrified and she found it difficult to even speak until Korsak managed to calm her. Maura had called for her as she tried to get out of the bed. It wasn't until she had fallen to the floor unconscious that Angela had reached her.

Korsak physically turned Angela from the scene when the paramedics pulled out the paddles. Maura's heart had stopped, that much he knew without any explanations from the professionals. He moved the both of them from Maura's room so that neither of them would have to witness the frantic effort on the part of EMS. It wasn't until Maura was wheeled out into the waiting ambulance that Angela was finally able to make any sense at all. She had collapsed down onto her knees pulling Vince down with her.

"Don't tell Jane." Angela's voice was low and stressed, not unlike her daughters when she was upset. "Please don't tell Jane."