Another Atlantis' balcony. John, Teyla and Aiden were lingering on another of Atlantis' numerous balconies at about the same time Elizabeth reached hers and played Rodney's message. They were disappointed and sad because Elizabeth was supposed to add Rodney's name to the list of people lost to the Wraith. For them, it meant that Atlantis had given up on her only salvage who could caress and mend her so that she could face a Wraith attack. But only John knew that Elizabeth hadn't put his name there, yet.

The ocean they were looking over was vast, endless. The sky was a breath-taking shade of red gently changing into dark blue. As if there was something hot all around, beginning to cool off on its way to becoming a freezing body.

"I don't understand why nobody's trying to find the Dart," Aiden spoke up suddenly. He was leaning over the metal railing and looking out at the darkening ocean beneath them, absently rubbing his elbow. His crutches were set next to him as he had refused to have them in his hands.

"It's not that easy," John responded from his left. His eyes were fixed on the sun but then he lowered them to the base of the tower. The water around looked dark and unfriendly.

"Everyone is pretty sure that he's dead already. They seem quite convinced that the Wraith piloting the Dart needed a snack." John said these words dully, not wanting to think too much about their significance now. "And if he's still alive, that Dart is too far away."

Teyla sighed sadly. She was standing to Aiden's right when she spoke: "Maybe it would be best if he has 'passed away'."

The men looked at her in surprise after using this phrasal verb. She didn't explain to them that she had learnt the euphemism not so long ago, and continued with her eyes on the light blue waters near the setting sun. "I don't want him to be held by them for a long period of time. I do not want to think that he's suffering." Her face saddened and she balled her hands into fists subconsciously, hitting the railing lightly. "Too many people have suffered at the hands of the Wraith. I do not want him to suffer like that, too."

Nobody said anything to it. There was no sensitive way how to respond. John's face was drawn when he remembered Sumner. There was no 'passing away' when a Wraith sucked the life from a man. But suffering… There was a hell of it involved in the process. Suddenly, his mind's eyes clearly saw his nightmare again, but this time it was Rodney whom the Wraith Keeper was interrogating, not Sumner. John shook his head to get rid of the image of ageing Rodney and focused on Aiden talking.

"It's so weird," Aiden had said before John began registering his words. "I just can't get my mind around this. He can't be dead!"

John gave him a rueful smile. He wanted to believe that Rodney was alive even though there were many proofs that he had been culled. However, that didn't mean anything for sure just yet.

Aiden went on: "I can't believe he's stuck on a Wraith ship. I won't think he's been fed upon. It just doesn't seem right!"

He ran a shaky hand through his hair and pulled his jacket more tightly around himself. "I keep thinking he's just in his lab, or about to step out that door," he pointed behind them to emphasise his point, "to find us. I just can't get rid of the feeling that he's still around somewhere and we haven't been looking in the right place thoroughly."

Teyla placed her hand on Aiden's right shoulder in sympathy. "It also seems wrong to me to think that Rodney's gone," she said seriously.

"It IS wrong," John exclaimed forcefully.

Aiden glanced sideways in his direction but knew better than to interrupt John's inner demons for now. Teyla squeezed Aiden's arm for a moment before settling back to gripping the cold metal.

They just stood or leaned, watching the sun slowly disappear below the horizon, leaving the night sky dark like black ink, swallowing up all the vestiges of colours. The waves were rolling below them, washing Atlantis as always, dark and ominous in their essence.

John watched the scenery, not wanting to remember all the people they had lost to the Wraith. There were many he didn't know much, thankfully, he thought to himself, but those few he knew, were enough to haunt the rest of his life.

They stayed on the balcony for several long minutes without uttering a single word. An occasional silent sigh or a shuffling of a leg were there, though.

When the brilliance of the last rays of sun dissipated, a faded moon claimed the sky, looking like a leftover ornament from a past celebration. Very slowly it began to take on lustre and then the other moon appeared below it.

It was a magnificent play of nature but nobody talked, and the quiet was quite welcome. The three team members didn't long for, couldn't, talk about the issue just yet. Would you have behaved any differently if your close friend had been proclaimed dead although his body hadn't been found?

However, Teyla couldn't help herself as she silently commented on the stars appearing in the sky. "These stars… Tonight they look like tiny pinpricks in a large black quilt."

Aiden and John looked up and accepted it; that day's night was clear without clouds. And the stars looked like small shining diamonds. The shapes they were forming were different from the Earth constellations but they created a pretty image, nonetheless.

"And according to an old Athosian legend," Teyla continued, "one shines for every person that has died. But there is no new star visible so Rodney can't be dead, right?"

John shook his head sadly. Teyla didn't know what they did about the universe and galaxies. New stars weren't born every day or when a person died. And even so, it would take millions of years before its light would reach their planet, and then the star could be burnt out already.

But neither John, nor Aiden wanted to steal her belief, her faith in the old story, so they exchanged a knowing look, that, of course, didn't come unnoticed to her, and avoided any comment from their side. She knew that they knew that her legend was a mysterious story based on the first understanding of the world. It had always helped her deal with a loss because, later on, she would think to herself that there was indeed a new star next to a known constellation.

Suddenly the gentle wind brought quiet sobs to them. They didn't know whose the sound was but, combined with the atmosphere of the night, it seemed as if it was Atlantis herself crying silently. They listened thoroughly but they were unable to pinpoint the source. And so they silently grieved with the sound of another broken soul.

– – – – – – – – – –

M1X-808, night time. Rodney snapped awake suddenly in the middle of the night. He didn't dream but it took him a moment to realise where he was and why.

He checked his body and sighed. He was stiff and aching, his head was pounding even more than last time and his mouth was dry. He groaned when he tried to stretch out to where he had left his casing to allay his thirst. The casing had filled with water completely, but the liquid was colder than before. Rodney drank the small amount and shook due to the feeling.

He rubbed his forehead because he had done all this on an autopilot like heating a coffee after falling asleep in his lab, and he blinked fast a few times. He was surprised to see clear shadows out of his sheltered area and thought his eyes may have adjusted to the darkness. However, it was caused by a super rare occurrence on this planet. The barrier of clouds had got thinner and allowed the moon to shine through its usually dense layer. Those clouds were acting as a natural barrier for the sun rays, which would be deadly otherwise.

"Time to get moving again I suppose," Rodney whispered. His breath created a tiny cloud of fog in front of his mouth.

"Is it really this cold?" he wondered. Then he sighed and went on: "I'm so damned tired. I don't think I can continue like that."

Rodney shivered badly and fingered his T-shirt, which was still damp. "Marvellous. Am I ever going to get dry?"

He was feeling as though he'd been this wet for weeks, as if it had been months since he was warm and dry.

Rodney sat up slowly and pulled his knees under his chin. "Another day," he thought aloud because outside it was as bright as if it was a very early morning. As he had woken up more, he considered it more plausible than his eyes had only adjusted, and, moreover, he had lost track of time quite a while ago. "Another day that will, either way, be my last day on this planet."

He sighed and added: "I just have to walk higher up the slope. Just go along the path and hope my feet won't betray me again. Or that a rabid or a hungry animal won't find my weakness overly attractive."

He shuddered. He dreaded leaving his 'cosy' shelter in the cold weather but he realised walking was his only possibility to warm up. What would he give for a steaming mug of the strong Athosian tea right now!

He rested his chin on his knees and shook in cold again. Not good. He was well aware of it. But he didn't know what was the major cause of it so he obviously expected the worst.

"I'm so screwed," he breathed out, but he couldn't help it, his thoughts drifted to his teammates afterwards. He closed his eyes and whispered: "It's probably night time at Atlantis. I hope you've been sleeping well since I got lost, not bothered by nightmares about the Wraith or something. Are you worried about me at all?"

Rodney wanted to believe that they were, that they didn't write him off. On the other hand, he hoped they weren't having a tough time due to this.

He yawned and rubbed his forehead. "Time to get moving," he told himself persuasively. Then he stiffly crawled out of his tonight's bedroom and carefully sat on a stone next to it.

It was quite demanding to stay awake, and he didn't know how long he had slept. With a small delay, he realised he had dropped the casing inside his hole, so he stretched out for it and lifted it up.

His bleary eyes fixed on it and tried to see something more than was apparent on the first sight. It wasn't just dangling wires and a broken metal shell of a former projector, no, it was his ticket home.

Rodney nodded to himself and clutched the projector to his chest. Then he put it in his pocket and zipped it closed. He couldn't afford to lose it at this moment, not when he was so close to his goal.

He wouldn't admit it aloud, but it also made him feel that he really belonged to a technological society. It was his only gadget and he clung to it for his dear life.

Then he took a steadying breath and carefully got to his feet. He didn't have the courage to check his injuries just yet for fear that it would prevent him from doing what was needed.

Ruefully he realised that whenever he was complaining about something, Carson treated his injuries lightly. It was him being quiet and responding with a 'yes' or a 'no' when he got concerned about their extent. Rodney knew that this time he would talk in the very start and then get silent so he didn't dare guess how Carson would react.

With a sigh, Rodney wobbled hard to gain his stability. When he thought he could balance adequately on his sore legs, he took a tentative step up the slope. It worked although he felt every muscle in his stiff body due to pins and needles in them.

He looked down the slope and all he saw was a layer of mist. As if the slope had been cut in two halves and one had moved to the sky. The fog was thick and he could only guess what it was concealing from him.

Rodney took a deep breath, checked his surroundings and began his journey to the top. As he was travelling onward, he realised that the mist was ever-present, only that it wasn't so dense around him. And amidst the mist, his dear deer carefully walked around him, wondering if the intruder posed any threat to them.

Rodney smiled. He could clearly hear the rustling of undergrowth although the animals refused to make themselves seen. They were keeping some distance, feeding just out of his reach, but didn't rush away. He hadn't attacked them so far so they believed it was safe to remain where they were.

Rodney was walking in his own tempo, almost oblivious to animals around because he couldn't see them wholly. Therefore, he jumped up in shock when there was a sudden loud rustling right next to him. His breathing hitched until his mind processed that it must have been one of the animals hiding and it must have darted away as he got too close. He understood that they hadn't got to meet people for a few decades, in the least, but he considered the reaction a bit exaggerated.

The journey was otherwise uneventful, given that it was the middle of the night, though he didn't know it, and the trail still continued. Rodney hoped for a thousandth time that it would really lead him to the Stargate and not to a distant place on the other side of the hills. The path switched back and forth, and together with the mist, it made him feel as though he was reaching the end of the world from medieval stories.

Rodney sniffed, wiped his nose on his sleeve and looked around. This part of the trail had become one murky mud but he couldn't get around it, he had to walk, if not slog, through it not to get lost again. The mud tugged at his boots, making his injured foot hurt almost unbearably as he pulled himself loose every time he wanted to make another step.

"You're getting closer," he encouraged himself. "Only a few moments, and you'll get a warm bed, a hot shower, and a cup of Teyla's strong hot tea. And Carson will feed you with pills for the pain and an IV to give you some dissolved additions to boost your immune system." Rodney sighed contently and added: "You'll be dry and warm and safe," he promised to himself, "no more cold and wetness and danger."

He trudged along, thinking about Atlantis and its people. 'It would be nice,' he mused in his head because he was getting short of breath, 'to have a little chat with the Major or hang out with Ford or Teyla.'

He found it funny that he was actually looking forward to seeing them again more than to his job and experiments as the chief scientist. 'Yeah,' he added mentally, 'I would love to find out what Zelenka is up to or what Grodin knows about the latest missions. Oh hell, I will have to report to Elizabeth, fill her in on my little adventure. And see if Carson has a bit of free time.'

Rodney sighed, struggling further up the path. He jerked his foot out of the deepening mud layer, realising that his limp was gradually getting worse and worse due to the ill-treatment.

"Great," he breathed out, "just great. I'm not going to make it. I'm not the type to do this."

He stopped to lean his left forearm on a tree next to the trail. He placed his head on his arm and breathed raggedly. "I've got no stamina," he complained silently. "I've never been one to like outdoor sports, camping and all that."

He lifted his head and looked up to the branches. "Give me any kind of a lab any day," he told them. "Give me a computer and at least one warm meal a day and I'll be over the moon."

He put more weight on his abused foot and groaned in pain. He couldn't go on like this anymore. It was a lunacy! He turned and leaned his back on the tree. "How much longer do I have to walk? How much further?" he asked silently.

Rodney watched the fog swivel around the trees and was mesmerised to find the fog's beauty in an open area in front of him. Once again he wished he hadn't accepted the mission, wished he had stayed in his comfortable lab.

His knees gave way under him and he slid down to the roots. As soon as his butt hit the ground, he stretched his legs and continued complaining: "I just can't walk any further. But I've got this far already. I must be very close to the Stargate."

He shook his head. "Who am I trying to convince? I'm miles away from its ring, following a trail to nowhere. I can't walk on in such a thick mud layer. It hurts too much."

He blinked and looked around. It seemed as though it was getting dark again but he could swear that he hadn't been walking for an entire day yet. "I'll never make it back," he whispered before adding a forceful: "But I have to."

He frowned when his eyes fell upon a structure in the mist. It looked like a house, a ruined and rotten one, but a house. He believed it was a mirage until it started to rain again and the fog partially cleared. He bent his head due to the pattering and got up carefully. Then he walked over to the building and…

Rodney got so elated! He found out the trail had led him right to the old village where all his adventure began a couple of days ago. He laughed hysterically, refusing to believe his luck. Gingerly, as if expecting the building to disappear in a snap of his fingers, he stretched his filthy hand out and touched the stone and wood. It remained there, it didn't vanish.

Rodney kissed the wall briefly and walked around the building. Thanks to his memory he figured out where he was in the village and set off along the path leading to the Gate, immediately feeling as if he could do anything in the world.