Maxs PoV
They made Fang leave the next morning. I had to stay for another week.
The nights were the worst. The nightmares were terrible. I begged and fought the nurses, trying to convince them not to give me the sedatives, but they always did anyway. So I had to relive everything, exactly the way it happened, up until the moment I shot him. Thats the only thing that changed. He would beg and plead for me not to do it, but I always pulled the trigger anyway.
Funny how something that didn't actually happen can haunt you so much.
The police came 3 times to get my statement. I made sure to tell them exactly what happened, no exaggeration. I just wanted this to be over.
When they finally released me, I was hoping the sedatives would be done for. Unfortunately, they just gave them to my mom and made her swear to give them to me. And from the steel in her eyes, I knew there would be no getting out of it.
We drove home in silence. I had a million pounds of homework to catch up on, but it wasn't exactly high on my priority list. I was tired, but I didn't want to sleep. I was hungry, but I didn't want to eat. Mostly what I wanted was to stop existing completely.
The feeling only increased when we pulled up to our house. Dylans mom was standing on our lawn, looking insane with rage. The last time I had seen her, there was a man with her, but today she was alone. There was a can of red spray paint in her hand, with stains splattered across her dress and hands.
And across the garage door was a spray painted word.
Murderer.
It felt like getting stabbed through the chest, reading that word. I heard the car door slam as my mother stormed up to Dylans. I could dimly hear them start to argue, but after a few seconds it faded out.
Everyone kept telling me I wasn't a murderer, that it was self defense, that it didn't count as murder. But I never quite believed them. Now here was the truth, smacking me in the face. It was murder, wasn't it? I took a life. Ended an existence. Turned a person into a cold corpse and left his family with nothing but a coffin and a memory.
Sounds like a murderer to me.
I could've shot his leg, or his arm. Something non-fatal. But I didn't. I chose death when I should have chosen life.
I heard my mom scream something along the lines of 'get off my property', then a second later my car door opened. I shook myself and started to get out of the car. Mom moved to help me, but I pushed her away. It might hurt, but I can at least walk to the damn door by myself. She looked worried, but let me go and got our stuff out of the trunk. I pointedly avoided looking at the bright red word scrawled across our house.
I stepped inside the house. The first thing I saw was one of Akilas chew toys, and had to look away. I missed her so much. That was one life lost that couldn't be blamed on me.
My eyes fell onto the stairs, and my heart sank. I was never going to make it up those to my room.
"I'll make you a bed on the couch." Mom said, coming up behind me. "Until you can get upstairs."
I nodded and sat down on the couch, sighing in relief and closing my eyes.
"So Max," Mom said as she swept into the kitchen. "When do you think you'll be ready to go back to school? After your ribs heal, obviously."
"I don't know, Mom." I rubbed my head, which had suddenly begun to ache.
"That's ok, honey. No rush. I'm going to go outside and… clean up." I heard the cambinets opening and closing as she got out cleaning supplies, then the front door.
I slowly moved so that I was laying on my side on the couch and closed my eyes.
I don't know whether I fell asleep or not, but awhile later I heard some sort of commotion outside. With difficulty, I pulled myself up and walked over to the window. As soon as I looked out, I was blinded by white flashes.
I yanked the curtains shut and backed away, blinking rapidly. The press. Of course they had to get in on the tradgedy of a dead boyfriend and his girlfriend who claims to have killed him in self defense. All the men will be using it as proof that all women are crazy and out to get them, and all the women would be playing up the abuse and the rape and claiming it was completely deserved.
I just wanted to wake up from this nightmare.
The house phone started trilling its happy little ringtone. I crossed to the kitchen counter and answered with a tired hello.
"Give me my son back!" screeched Dylans mother from the other end. "Give me-"
I slammed the phone down and slid to the ground. I buried my head in my arms and blinked back tears. The phone kept ringing, ringing, ringing. I could hear shouts outside as my mother attempted to beat back the papparrazi and the click of flashing cameras. I couldn't do this, not right now, when the guilt is still ripping me to shreds.
"Max." A hand landed on my shoulder. I jerked away instinctivally, jarring my ribs, and my head shot up to stare at the person. I half expected to see blond hair and clear blue eyes grinning down at me, but instead I saw the opposite.
"Fang? How did you get in here?" I exclaimed, half relieved and half scared.
"Back door was unlocked." he said. "Wanted to check on you."
"Did you lock it when you came in?" He nodded, and I sighed in relief.
"Press got to you too, huh?"
I frowned and looked at him, then realization dawned. He had been there too. He saw everything I had seen. The press wanted him too.
A closer inspection of his face revealed tired circles under his eyes. He had been home a week longer than I had, so he had been dealing with the press for that long at most. And the nightmares probably hadn't helped much, either.
"Are you doing ok?" I asked him. A slight smile quirked at the edge of his lip and he helped me to my feet again.
"I've been better." he answered. "I heard Dylans mom is going to bring in lawyers, take you to court."
I sighed. "I know. She called me a few minutes ago, screaming for me to give her son back. And she spray painted Murderer on the garage door."
"You aren't a murderer." Fang told me, firmly but tiredly. "She's in mourning. She's hurt. If she had known what he did-"
"What good would that do?" I interrupted. "Even if she believed me, it would just ruin her memory of her son."
Fang didn't say anything, and I sighed. I was tired. We were both tired. I wanted to go to sleep, but I didn't want to dream.
Both of our heads turned as the door opened. My mother stomped in in a rage, and slammed the door shut, making me flinch ever so slightly. Fang looked at me, but I refused to acknowledge my moment of fright.
"Those damned reporters!" she swore, slamming her hand down on the counter, making me jump again. "Do they have any idea what you've been through?! They keep calling it a tradgedy, but I don't even think they know what that word means!"
She make a sound of exasperation, then seemed to notice the extra person in the room.
"Fang? What are you doing here?"
"He came to check on me." I answered, sensing Fang would rather not talk too much right now.
"Thats probably not a good idea. People might think you're coming up with a cover story or something."
"I don't care what people think!" I suddenly snapped. "They don't know shit about it!"
"Maximum!" Mom exclaimed angrily. I wasn't sure if she was mad at my language or my sudden mood swing.
Just like that, I wasn't angry anymore, just exhausted. I turned away from my mom and went back to the couch, resuming my lying down position. I heard her huff and stomp up the stairs.
"I didn't mean to do that." I muttered, not to myself but not really to anyone else either.
"I know." Fang answered, moving my feet to sit on the couch. "We're all a little edgy."
I sighed.
(A/N I know you all want to kill me for not updating. But can you wait until after ComiCon? Yeah, I'm at ComiCon in Phoniex and it;s sooooo amazing and tiring at the same time. I'm cosplaying as Fang, with the leather jacket and the black jeans and the combat boots and little black wings. But it's killer in Arizona heat, I'll tell you that much. And tomorrow I'm going to a death note panel from 10:30 to 1. It's gonna be awesomesauce.
Ok. Tumblr blogs. I haz a maximum ride one (mycrazymaxrideblog) a horror one (skogsra-and-mylings) and a general (arwenride). I also have a youtube channel Jade Lane, which might change cause that ones lame, but whatever. Goodnight peeps.
UNC-
Silence)
