So I wrote this the day after episode 5x07 and the lack of Cophine made my muse demand fluff. I really wanted to explore simple, domestic days in the life. Don't judge my love of Xena. If you don't love that show too you are MISSING OUT! Thanks to belowthesky for her amazing beta-ness!


One of the perks of being 'the sick one' was that Cosima wasn't allowed to lift a finger helping Delphine move-in. While she didn't want to be defined by her disease or have it looming over every conversation, she wasn't above using it to her advantage. But only every once in awhile. The hospital in San Francisco released her relatively quickly as, apart from her seizure and concussion she got during the process of said seizure, and the incurable illness, there was nothing wrong with her. After all, it was just a seizure. People had seizures every day and only a small amount of them ended up in the hospital. It was only because of her disease that things had escalated.

They weren't able to determine what caused the seizure. Best guess, as anticipated, another symptom of the disease and something else to worry about. Awesome. As if Delphine wasn't already overdoing the doctor role.

They spent an extra day in San Fran with her mother, but it was a relaxing day in which Delphine and Carolyn waited on Cosima hand and foot and ensured she did as little as possible. The next day, confident there would be no further incidents, she and Delphine made their return flight home without issue.

Though Delphine still promised Cosima's doctors and mother, as her physician, to monitor Cosima and ensure she took it easy. Thus, she was taking it easy. On the sofa. While everyone else helped. With the cannula tucked over her ears and under her nose like the good patient she never was.

Thankfully she had four healthy sisters who adored her girlfriend and were happy to help. Okay, three who adored her girlfriend and were happy to help. Sarah was helping, but she still didn't trust Delphine. To be fair, she didn't trust anybody so that wasn't all that surprising. And Felix. Felix was helping too. He always helped where he could. Paul wasn't invited to the party and Donnie conveniently hurt his back the morning of the move. Didn't matter. They were strong, independent women who didn't need men to help them.

Cosima was reminded of a Xena musical episode before Xena's daughter was born where Xena's mother was asking her how she would raise the baby without a man and how she would get by and whatnot. You know, aside from the fact that Xena was the freaking Warrior Princess and could do it herself. But there was a song Xena sang about how 'sisters are doing it for themselves...standing on their own two feet...ringing on their own bells...' The song wouldn't leave her head as she watched her sisters and she couldn't help but chuckle.

"Yeah, right, laugh. Have a grand ol' time while we're busting our asses." Beth complained as she and Delphine came in carrying a large oak bookshelf across the living room and into the office. The up until this point, empty office.

"You're hardly busting your asses. She doesn't have all that much stuff." Cosima protested.

"No she doesn't." Sarah agreed, carrying a rather large box. "But what she does have is bloody heavy!"

Felix came in after her holding a pillow. "It's alright to me."

Immediately Sarah dropped the box, yanked the pillow out of her brother's hands and hit him as hard as she could with it.

"Hey! What? The pillows aren't going to move themselves." He protested.

Sarah stopped and smiled. "You twat."

"Children, children," Alison reprimanded on her way up the stairs with another box, this one labeled 'linens.' "Bedroom, Delphine?"

"Yes, thank-you Alison."

Cosima chuckled at her crazy rag-tag family when she noticed Kira had stopped coloring on the coffee table and was looking around with a sad expression on her face. "Hey Kir, what's the matter?" She asked, gently coughing into her elbow.

"Does Delphine moving in mean we can't have sleepovers anymore?" The child asked sadly.

"No of course not sweetie. You are always welcome here. Why would it mean we can't have sleepovers?"

"Where will we sleep?" The child asked.

Cosima's brow furrowed in confusion so she looked over at Sarah who shrugged. "The same place you always do."

"Buuuut isn't that going to be Delphine's room now? Where's she going to sleep?"

Cosima's eyes went wide. "Uh-huh." She nodded, taking the cannula off and hanging it on the oxygen tank. It wasn't like she needed it all the time. It was more of a precaution than anything else at the moment, and headed upstairs after her girlfriend. "You get to deal with that one Sar."

It wasn't that she didn't know how to broach the same-sex relationship aspect with Kira. Her Uncle had covered that years ago, but she didn't know how to have those kinds of serious discussions with a child. Besides, being the cool aunt meant she didn't have to.

Upstairs she stood by the doorway to the bedroom, sidestepping to let Alison back down the stairs- they really owed her a cake or something since she was the only one of her sisters consistently helping, and watched Delphine move around the room; hanging things in the closet, throwing a blanket on the bed, putting a framed picture of the two of them on her nightstand, hanging something on the wall. Cosima hadn't done much decorating. Delphine helped her furnish the house when she moved in, but she didn't have paintings or pictures or anything hanging on the walls. She didn't have knick-knacks or trinkets or things hanging around just because she liked them. Delphine did and with every item Delphine took out of her box and put in their shared space it made it feel more like a home.

"Mon Dieu Cosima!" Delphine exclaimed, a hand flying to her chest. "You scared me."

"Sorry." Cosima said, not in the least bit sorry. "I came up to see if I could do anything to help and then I couldn't stop looking at you."

"Oh yes, I am sure I am quite something to look at right now." Delphine scoffed, tucking a stubborn curl behind her ear for probably the fifteenth time in the last thirty seconds. She was tired and sweaty, but even with no make-up, sweat dripping down her back, hair haphazardly tied up in a messy bun, ripped jeans and oversized sweater, she still looked like a goddess to Cosima. "Where is your cannula?"

"You know I will always find you irresistible." Cosima said, finally making her way into the room and pointedly ignoring her girlfriend's question.

Delphine couldn't help the blush that spread over her face.

"But, I was thinking about how this is all ours now. It feels so much more like home with you and all your stuff here. It all just fits."

Delphine swatted Cosima's wandering hands away with a smile and placed a fleeting kiss on her lips as she ran back out of the room.

"Delphine!" Cosima moaned in complaint. It had been a couple of hours now and she was bored. Not that even if she wasn't she would have been placated with such a chaste kiss.

"Soon, chérie. I promise!"

Cosima sighed and flopped down on the bed. Delphine was much more organized than she was. She wouldn't sit down until all of the boxes were unpacked and every single bobby pin had a home whereas Cosima would have been content to leave the boxes where they were until they slowly got unpacked as she needed things. Rolling over onto her belly and grabbing Delphine's pillow she smiled. Didn't matter how or when things got unpacked...Delphine was home!

"Oi, what's Delphine making for dinner tonight?" Sarah asked, trying to mask her excitement. For as much as she didn't trust anyone outside of her family, she trusted Delphine's cooking.

Cosima turned over to address her sister, hoping she hadn't been caught with her nose in her girlfriend's pillow. Thankfully Sarah had a large box in her hands and didn't give any indication Cosima had been caught as she, not so gently, dropped the box by the bottom of the bed.

"Oh, I thought I'd give Delphine a break tonight." Alison said before Cosima could open her mouth, coming in and carrying a box into the closet. 'Shoes' Cosima shook her head. She was pretty sure there were three or four identically labeled boxes already in the closet. "She's doing so much she's going to be tired. I brought things to make vegetarian lasagna."

Cosima smiled and her wild sister deflated. Alison was a good cook, but couldn't hold a candle to Delphine's French cuisine. But if there was one dish of hers that Cosima nearly drooled over, it was that. It was something all the sestras would eat and thus a favorite among them.

"Unless there's an issue with that?" Alison asked.

"Issue with what?" Beth asked, joining the rest of them as she and Delphine set a beige arm bench down at the foot of the bed, Helena and Felix trailing behind them with a box of books and more pillows, respectfully.

"Ali cooking family dinner tonight." Cosima explained. Sarah mumbled something inaudible under her breath. Not that she would ever say, but she had been looking forward to Delphine cooking. One of the only reasons she agreed to help. That, and she knew it was important to Cosima. Though for as much as she denied it, Sarah was warming up to the Frenchwoman. A time or two they actually had a pleasant conversation, even.

"Oh, we're doing family dinner tonight?" Beth asked.

Alison came out of the closet, brushing off her hands. "Might as well. We're all here."

"Yes, dinner, family, we should do this." Helena agreed. "Much moving. We will need to replenish our strength."

"Settled then." Felix smiled. "I brought wine."

Cosima noticed Beth look around the room at all of them. Her eyes were glassy, almost as if she was going to cry, and the way her eyes floated from one of them to the next made it seem like she wasn't quite seeing what was in front of her. "Everything okay Beth?"

"Yeah, yeah I just have to work tonight. You know how it is."

"Oh, well there's always next time." Alison shrugged, interrupting before Cosima could press Beth further. "I'll save you some."

"No." Beth said a little too quickly. "Ah, no thanks Al. I'll just uh...catch it...next time. I'll see you guys later." With a look to each of them in the room landing on Cosima last, Beth offered her a quick, tight-lipped smile. "You all be good."

Felix scoffed. "Sounds dreadfully boring."

Beth, Alison, Felix and Sarah all headed back downstairs and the thought of hoisting herself off the bed made Cosima cough, but she took a couple of deep breaths and went to get up just for Delphine to hold her hand up in a 'stay there' motion. She went to the door and once she was sure everyone was downstairs, closed it all but a crack and turned to Cosima. "Something is up with Beth."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean something has been...off the past couple of weeks."

"Have you asked her about it?" Beth might be Cosima's sister, but the truth was that lately Delphine saw her more than any of them did. Apart from their morning runs, Beth always seemed to be at work. Anytime any of them asked her to hang out or anything she was always busy. "That's the life of a cop." Beth would say.

Delphine took a breath and shrugged. "I have and Alison has. At first she said she had a fight with Paul, but when I asked her again she was conveniently late for work. And now..."

"What?" Cosima prodded.

Delphine pulled a small bag out of her back pocket. "She dropped this outside."

Cosima took the small baggie and felt her blood run cold. "You sure Felix didn't drop this?" She joked, but it fell flat. There was no mistaking the white powder inside, but it didn't make sense for Beth to have it.

"It wasn't Felix." Delphine simply shook her head. "I think something's happened at work. Her partner followed us for a few of our runs and once I hung back after Beth left to ask him and he didn't know either. Just said that she started acting differently after one of their cases and the Captain told him to keep a close eye on her."

"Why didn't you tell me? I could have talked to her."

"I told Alison. She told Sarah who told Siobhan. You've had enough going on. They told me not to give you more to worry about, but now..." She gestured to the bag in Cosima's hand.

Cosima took a deep breath. Made sense now why she hadn't seen her sister in a while. Cosima had a nose like a bloodhound and usually knew when something was up and since this was clearly something Beth didn't want any of them to know about, she kept her distance. That would change. After dinner Cosima was going down to the station and Beth wouldn't have any choice but to talk to her.


"Delphine! Come on!" Cosima yelled up the stairs again. "Towels can wait! Dinner was ready twenty minutes ago! We're hungry!"

"So eat! I'll be down in a minute!" Delphine yelled down the stairs from the bedroom.

"That's what you said twenty minutes ago!"

"Delphine!" Sarah joined her sister at the stairs. "So help me if your arse isn't down here in one minute! We're bloody hungry and Alison won't let us eat until you come down."

Delphine wordlessly floated down the stairs seven seconds later and took her seat at the table without a word.

Cosima looked at Sarah in awe. "You have to tell me how you did that."

With everyone seated at the table, Cosima took a moment to look around. Nearly all the most important people in her life were sitting in this room. Her family, her love, her entire world in one place. Twice now she had to tell them she was dying. Once some time after she was first diagnosed. After they'd tried a variety of treatments and she kept getting sicker. The second time when she told them she was stopping treatment. When she was in the hospital at least they had hope, even if it wasn't based on anything, even if she was still dying. To have taken that hope away and tell them she was willingly choosing to leave that behind was telling them for a second time that she was going to die.

If Duncan couldn't help them she would be forced to tell them a third time. Because now they had that fake hope again, only Cosima didn't know it was fake. Not at first. Not when she looked up at her girlfriend's beaming face as she talked about treatments and statistics and resources and actually believed they could cure this.

Even though it wasn't Delphine's fault, Cosima couldn't help but feel a little resentful. This was one of the reasons she hadn't wanted a relationship. Because she knew this would happen. She knew anyone she was with would want her to try to find a cure, try to find a way to live, and that would have been wonderful if she didn't already know there was no cure. Cosima didn't want treatment after treatment after treatment that got her nowhere, but she knew if she was with someone they would want her to, so she would and this exact situation would happen. Where they had been searching for something for months and kept coming up empty. Each time would be like a tiny piece of her soul dying along with her hope, and because of that she would start to resent the person who made her believe things could be different. Because she knew they wouldn't be.

It wasn't Delphine's fault. It was Cosima's. For breaking her own rules and falling for this amazing woman and believing they could cure her. But, while she might be a little resentful of Delphine, she also needed her. No one made her happier and feel safer and more loved and cared for. When she woke up in the middle of the night and saw Delphine lying beside her, she could pretend things were okay. When she heard Delphine singing softly in French while she showered, she could pretend she didn't already have an approximate number of showers she had left to enjoy. When they were being domestic and cuddled up on the sofa watching the news, on the exceedingly rare occasion that happened, after a long day with glasses of wine she could turn to Delphine and lose herself in in her and forget.

But if it turned out that Dr. Duncan wasn't the miracle they needed, then everything would come crashing down again and Cosima wasn't sure she had the strength to survive it a third time. Not now that she had Delphine too.

A gentle had on the back of her neck made Cosima jump.

"Are you okay mon amour?"

Cosima smiled sadly. "Just thinking."

"Are you feeling okay?" The hand moved to her forehead, checking her temperature.

Cosima moved away. "I'm fine." Taking a few deep breaths to push the rattling in her chest down to avoid a bloody coughing show in front of her family, Cosima reminded herself that Delphine was only doing this because she cared. Delphine tried, but it was impossible for her to stop checking for signs and symptoms and the line between girlfriend and doctor was getting more blurred with each passing day. It was only reminding Cosima of how serious everything was and she didn't need the constant reminder.

"Umm..."

Cosima and Delphine looked across the table. The color had left Alison's face.

"Alright?" Sarah asked.

Alison shook her head, replying to a text on her phone. "It's Beth. She's not making any sense."

Sarah's eyes quickly darted from Alison to Cosima. "Hey Cos, can you-"

"She knows, Sarah." Delphine said as Alison pushed the call button and brought the phone to her ear.

"Didn't we say it was better not to tell her?"

Cosima waved her hand. "I'm right here."

"I am not as comfortable with lying to her as everyone else is." Delphine protested. "I only just told her this afternoon. She deserved to know."

"Beth?! Beth what's going on?"

Sarah quickly turned back to Delphine as Alison excused herself from the table. "This isn't over."

Sarah, Cosima and Delphine followed Alison into the study. "Alison, what's happening?" Sarah asked, closing the door behind them.

Alison shook her head. "I...I...I don't know she's..."

Sarah took the phone and Cosima went to Alison

"Jesus Christ Beth what did you take this time?" Sarah cursed lowly into the phone.

"Where is she? I have access to any number of medications for various drug overdoses at DYAD," she whispered to Sarah, catching Cosima's eyes as she held her sister tighter and shielded her from the conversation a few steps away.

Sarah looked up at Delphine, her glare turning immediately from one of anger to one of appreciation. "Beth? I'm coming to get you. Where are you?" She shoved the phone at Delphine. "I'm calling Art and going over there. Keep trying to talk to her."