I'm back. I was enjoying wonderful stories with mindful plots, a good story line and thought out characters and I have to come back to this... thing! Am I crazy? Don't answer that.
I also absolutely forgot what the heck is going on in this so don't mind me. Also, last thing my dear tourists, my mother decided to give a message to Tara/Maudite before realizing that this story was completely over.
My mother's message to Tara Gillespie/Maudite when I read her the first chapter and then explained what the story is: " I can't believe you have no idea Harry and Draco are wizards. What is going on in your, so called, gothic mind?"
(I said stop flaming the story it was a mistake when professor Trlawney said that ok! Go too fucking hell! You suck! Thanks to fily for the help! Raven have fun with kiwi!)
Chapter 28.
AN: I sed stop gflmaing da story it wuz a miskat wen profsor relory sed dat ok!11111111(Ok. Than why didn't you fix it.) GO 2 FOKENG HELL!1111(NO! YOU GO!) U SUK!(DOUBLE FOR YOU!) fangz 2 fily 4 da help!1!(A new helper who doesn't help that much.) raven hav fun wif kiwi!1111111(She just told her "friend" Raven to go have fun with a KIWI! ... This does not help with mental images.)
We went in2 a blak room.(I thought you guys went outside!) The wallz were blak(Well... It is a black room and seeing as you take everything so seriously...) with portraits of gothic bands lik MCR, GC and Marlin Mason (Who in the world is Marlin Mason?)all over them. A big black coffin was in the middle.(Time for more "Goffick"!) Red vevlet lined da blak box.(At least she got three words right, I think I would have cried if she got the word "box" wrong.) There were three chairs made of bones with real skullz in dem.(Whose skulls? Because if it's from some guy from like Walmart then that is not cool. Make it a tribal warrior at least, gives it more "pazzaz".) I wuz wearing(Don't care.) a blak corset bar wif purple stuff on it,(Don't care.) fishnet suckings (Don't care.)and a blak leather thong underneath.(That can't be... comfortable. Oh, and still: don't care.)
I sat down one of da chairs dispersedly.(She sat the chairs down? How does that help anyone? ... Dispersedly? Not even going to comment on that!) So did Drako and Vampire.(Wonderful.) "Are you okay?" Vampir asked potting his albastard (I... I don't even know what to say! I'm shocked! This... This is so funny! I can't stop laughing right now! I'm completely serious, as I'm typing I am giggling like a little school girl!)hand on mine. He was wearing(Really don't care.) black nail polish. I was wearing(Why don't you ever shut it about this!) blak nail polish with red crosses on it.(Don't care.) "Yah I guess." I said sadly.(As I said before: I forgot what happened before this and I refuse to reread everything so I'll let it pass. But... Usually when someone has to ask if you are "okay" it means that something traumatic happened so I say that she is LYING!) Drako also pot his hand on mine sexily.(He "pot" his hand. Is he smoking pot or is his hand in a pot or ,maybe, he's smoking his hand!) I smiled sadly with my blak lipstick.(Oh my god! Shut it!) "The problem is… … … … … … … … …(Something for suspense. Why don't all you at home play the JAWS sound track! That should help!)I have to seduce Volxemort. Ill have 2 go bak in time"(Or you could kill him. It's just a thought you know. From a sane person... I think.)
Draco started to cry sadly.(Suck it up buttercup... That sounds incredibly wrong at this particular time.) Vampire hugged him.
"Itz okay Eboby."(Maudite. I've decided to stick with the name for now... Even if I'm not happy about it.) he said finally. "But what about me? Ur not gonna brake up or anyfing, are you?"(You have got to be kidding me. If I were you Draco, I'd ditch this chick and find someone who actually cares about you. Thanks for the advice but if you remember: We had never been together! I don't even know this chick! I've never seen her before! Shut it! Stop ruining my moment! You don't even like me! Does it matter?)
"Of coarse not!" I gasped.
"Really?" he asked.(Ugh! I want to puke!)
"Sure." I said.
We frenched sexily. (I predict another stupid sex scene. Tourist, please avert your eyes.)Vampire looked at us longingly.
Then… … … …(I'm thinking. What soundtrack would be good for this... No, not the Notebook! Who ever suggested that should be imprisoned!... Think up something raunchy.) I took off Draco's MCR shrift(So they went to a Thrift shop and bought a shirt so she calls it "shrift". That makes sense!) and seductvely took of his pants.(You misspelled "seductively" and you missed an "F". It went for your grade in spelling instead of this abomination, I believe.) He was hung lik a stallone.(I'm sorry, but right now, again, I really can't stop laughing!) He had replaced the Vampire tattoo that said Enoby (With that exact spelling too!)on it. Black roses were around it. I gasped. He lookd exactly lik Gerard Way.(I'm not even going to ask if "Gerard Way", who ever he is, even has a tattoo because it is impossible for him to have the same exact tattoo. And even if he did I wouldn't believe it because in my mind there is no way!) Vampire took a vido camera. (I had sed it wuz ok b4).(I'm sure you did. Just so everyone is caught up: They are going to have sex and Vampire/Harry is going to film it! Shut it back there. I know I have the wrong word but I'm French and you are going to have to deal with it! Got it!)
I took of my clothes den we were in 4 da rid of r lif.(I'm trying to make sense of this sentence but I think my brain just went on holiday. Again.)
We started freching as we climbed into the cofin.(Seven words right out of nine! She's getting better at this Grammar thing!) He put his spock(I think she means "dick" or "cock" or "penis" or "joystick" or... Sorry, I googled "other words for penis" and it gave me plenty!) in my you-know-what (Google other words for "Vagina" and find out yourselves!) and passively we did it.(How in the world do you "passively" have sex? I mean... Is that even possible?) "I love you Eboby. Oh let me feel u I need 2 feel u."(Sounds so sexy. For the ones who don't know: Hazel's using the sarcastic voice.) he screamed as we got an orgasm.(That wasn't even a scream. I'm feeling cheated right now for some reason that I don't even know!) We watched Vampire filmed everything perfectly. Suddenly… … … … … … … … … … (Nothing! You dreamed it all and we find out you're actually a teacher! I think my ending is even more scary than anything she ever will write in this thing! Tell me I'm right if you think so!)
"WHAT THE FUCK R U DOING!"(Ruining the moment apparently. Thank you!)
It was … … … … … … … … … … .(Dun Dun. Dun Dun. Dun Dun Dun Dun Dun Dun Dun Dun DUNNNNN! Blame Jaws.)Snope(Snape with scope! Quick! Look away!) and Profesor McGoggle!111(She's wearing goggles! That's why Maudite calls her that! Now I got it! That just leaves one question: Did McGonagall steal them from Hooch?)
(Guess it's my turn. I'm running out of ideas so why don't you guy's make up your own scenario.)
Snape looked around the room and went even more pale than he usually is. McGonagall asked the two boys what had happened before the teachers had arrived but all she could understand was that somehow the room had filled with water until it was waist high and the girl had been eaten by a shark. She looked around the room: There wasn't a single puddle.
