Chapter Twenty-Eight

The Journey Begins

Hours later Leonardo opened his eyes and found out he was still under the shelter. As he sat up, he winced as he felt very stiff from sleeping on the hard roof. As he looked out from under the shelter he saw that it was daytime but the sky was still very dark due to storm clouds.

Even though it had stopped raining, the clouds were still very dark and black.

Leonardo began to remember what had happened at the lair and the shame and dishonour washed over him like freezing water. Leonardo pulled his knees to his chest and began to sob.

As he cried, he wondered if he could ever make up for what he did. He knew he had hurt his brother physically and hurt everyone else spiritually. He didn't know if his family would forgive him and he didn't know if they were planning to banish him because of what he did.

"I can't go home..." he thought "I cannot face my family...I don't even know if they've been wondering where I have been or if they're waiting for me to return"

He then began to wonder what Splinter would say to him when he returned, or whether his brothers would talk to him again or if Mona would look him in the eye again.

The more he thought about it, the more he felt in his soul got worse; it was like there was a knife twisting within him making him bleed internally. Leonardo then looked down at a puddle near him and he saw his reflection in it. He stared at it for a few minutes wondering if the turtle he was looking at was really him or an insane monster.

He hadn't heard Mashimi's voice come to him, nor seen him in the mirrors but he could still feel the poison within him and he started to wonder if there was any way he could remove the poison from his soul.

Leonardo crossed his legs and closed his eyes and began to mediate.

Clearing his mind he tried to think hard, it was difficult to concentrate as he could still see the faces of his horrified family and the bleeding wounds on Raphael.

But he soon managed to push the thoughts away and he began to see other things in his mind.

As he meditated he began to smell the sweet scent of lotus flowers and blossoms and he saw the calm picture of a blossom tree on a hill and in the background, he saw a large white capped mountain, Mount Fuji.

Leonardo stared at the scene in his mind and he remembered that place!

"Japan" he thought "The home of the Ancient One" he thought about his training with the wise and powerful Ancient One and remembered how Splinter had sent him there after he had accidently hurt him in a training session.

"Maybe I should go back there..." he thought "Maybe if I go there...I may find solace and peace..."

The more Leonardo thought about Japan, he thought again about his family.

"After what I did" he thought "they won't miss me...they hate me...I know Raph does...and Mona..." tears fell from his eyes as he thought more about Mona and how devastated she was.

"I'm so sorry..." Leonardo whispered, "But I know it's too late to say I'm sorry to any of you...maybe if I do leave...you won't have to see my face again, I've dishonoured you, I've hurt you, and I've shamed and dishonoured myself..."

Leonardo opened his eyes then narrowed them with determination.

He then crawled out from under the shelter and stood up, he looked around New York then out to the sea. He guessed that he could jump on a ship to Japan easily like he did last time he went there.

Taking a deep breath and making up his mind he turned and began to run back to the city and back to the lair.


Leonardo ran as fast as he could back to the lair, he knew everyone would be asleep now as they always slept during the daytime. At least he hoped they were asleep.

He ran over the rooftops and jumped the gaps until he came to the alleyway where he had climbed out of the manhole.

Leonardo climbed down the fire escape of the building he was standing on and went down the manhole. He then ran through the sewers as fast as he could and he soon made it to the lair.

Leonardo's stomach tightened in fear as he wondered whether Splinter or his brothers and Mona were still awake.

He stood outside the entrance and walked forward slowly. All was very quiet in the lair, he looked around and saw that the TVs and the computer were off and the lights were off apart from some small nightlights in the corners of the lair.

Leonardo stood very still and held his breath as he listened for any sounds.

But the whole lair was completely silent. Leonardo guessed everyone had gone to sleep.

Leonardo climbed up to his room and decided to prepare for his journey to Japan. He found a backpack and began to pack all the different essentials he needed for his journey.

As he packed he saw the box on the bedside table that had the bracelet he was going to give to Mona.

Leonardo walked over to it and opened it, as he did; he felt the tears form in his eyes as he looked at the shining pearls and the lotus flowers. He then looked up towards where Mona's room was.

He lit a small candle and walked out of his room and over to Mona's room.

Leonardo could see the door was slightly ajar. He walked over and saw Mona was lying in her bed.

Leonardo crept in as quietly as he could, he then saw she was indeed fast asleep, her hair was spread around the pillow like delicate rose petals and her hand rested next to her head and her other rested delicately on her breast.

Leonardo couldn't get over her prettiness as she lay there like Sleeping Beauty.

As he lifted his candle he saw that there were tear marks around her eyes showing she had cried herself to sleep. Leonardo felt his heart break in two seeing her tears.

"Oh Mona..." he whispered "I wish I hadn't lost control...I didn't want to hurt you...all I wished was that you were mine...But I was never clear enough"

He knelt next to her side and placed the candle on the side table. He then placed his fingers on her cheek and stroked the tear marks on her cheeks. As he did, Mona made no movement.

"I wish I had said something sooner" he whispered "I promised I would make you so happy after all the shit that had happened to you, and that I would protect you"

Leonardo gritted his teeth as the tears fell again.

"But instead...I hurt you and broke your heart when I attacked and injured Raphael" he wiped his tears and tried to control himself "I wish I could tell you how sorry I am, I wish I could express how sorry I am...I wish I could turn back the clock..."

He lifted the bracelet, "I was going to give you this bracelet to show you my deep undying love for you...but you chose Raphael..." he then placed the bracelet on Mona's wrist that rested on her chest

"I wish I could have given it to you sooner" he looked at her wrist again and admired the bracelet, "it suits you..." he whispered.

Leonardo then leaned forward and placed his lips on Mona's forehead.

"Sleep tight Monalisa..." he whispered "May you be happy with the one you have chosen...with the turtle you love..." he slid his hands away from her cheek and stood up.

He took one last look at her, then picked up his candle and left the room.

Leonardo returned to his room then made sure he had everything he needed for his journey. He then found a large notebook and a pen and began to write a note to his family:

To Master Splinter, Mona, April, Casey and my brothers.

By the time you read this note, I will already be gone. I know what I did was dishonourable and words cannot express how ashamed of myself I am and how bitter I feel.

For the years I have been part of this family, I have sworn to protect and care for my brothers and sensei as a true leader. But I broke that vow and promise when my blade injured Raphael.

I cannot live with the fact that I did something so dishonourable and shameful. I know you all must be shocked and ashamed of my actions, and I can understand that you must think I am a terrible person and completely insane.

To my Sensei, I'm sorry I dishonoured you, and that I let you down, I never wanted it to be this way. I wish I could make up for what I have done. But I know I cannot take back the dishonour.

To my brothers, I cannot express my sadness and shame, I have shocked you and broke your hearts with my actions and Raphael, I'm so sorry I hurt you, but I know it is too late to say I'm sorry, after what I did to you.

To Mona, I wish I could turn back the clock, I'm sorry for everything, I just wish I had told you my feelings, maybe if I had said something, maybe things would have been different. It's true, I've loved you since you moved into the lair and I wanted to make you so happy after everything that happened to you, you're such a good and beautiful person, and you deserve so much.

As I write this note with a heavy heart, I have made my decision to leave New York and go back to Japan and I don't think I will return. Maybe there I might find solace and peace and maybe the strength to clear the venom and dishonour from my soul, whether I succeed or not, I will not stop trying to wash these poisonous stains from my soul.

If I should not return, I want to tell you all, my love for you is strong and I will never stop loving any of you. I wish I could turn back time and never have hurt you but I cannot take back what has been done.

Goodbye Master Splinter, Goodbye my brothers, Goodbye April and Casey, I'm sorry for everything. Goodbye Mona, may happiness be yours.

Leonardo

Leonardo finished writing the note, and then placed his pen down. He saw some of the ink had run due to some of his tears that had fallen.

He placed the note on his bed and took the backpack off the bed. He then looked around his room sadly taking in everything he owned and how he would probably never return.

Leonardo then searched in his wardrobe and found a black baggy Japanese suit, he had worn it for disguise before and because it was black he was able to blend into the darkness more easily. He dressed into it and placed his katana swords on his back.

Leonardo then picked up his backpack and walked down to the middle of the lair. He stood there for a while looking around taking in the surroundings of what was once his home.

Tears filled his eyes as he thought of the years he and his brothers had lived there together, and now because of his dishonour, he would never experience those moments again.

Leonardo looked towards Splinter's room and looked at the other bedrooms of his brothers. He decided to say a last goodbye to his brothers before he left on his journey.

He walked over to Michelangelo's room and peeked in where he saw the young turtle laying on his front and his arms dangling over the side of the bed and his duvet was hanging off. Leonardo swallowed hard as he thought about his playful and happy go lucky baby brother.

"Goodbye Mikey..." he whispered walking into his baby brother's room "Keep smiling...even when you're feeling sad" he then pulled the duvet over Michelangelo's body so he wouldn't be cold.

Leonardo then walked away from Michelangelo's room and walked towards Donatello's room where he saw the brainy turtle had a book resting on his chest. Leonardo sighed sadly as he thought about his intelligent yet sensitive and caring little brother. He walked in and took the book out of his sleeping brother's hands before placing it on the bedside table.

"Goodbye Donnie" he whispered "Take care of the others"

Leonardo then went to Raphael's room, he hesitated a little but after a minute he peeked though the door and saw his hot-headed brother laying in his hammock and his wounds bandaged up. Leonardo felt his heart pound and hurt as he looked at the bandages.

"Goodbye Raph" he whispered as tears fell from his eyes "I'm sorry for everything, but I know you must hate me now after what I did to you...take care of Mona...and protect the others for me"

Leonardo stepped away from Raphael's room then walked over to Splinter's quarters. He quietly slid open the door and looked in to see his Master sleeping peacefull in his bed.

"Goodbye Sensei" he whispered "You've been a great master and father to me all these years...I'm so sorry I've dishonored you..." he bowed then closed the sliding doors.

He wiped the tears from his eyes then began to walk towards the exit of the lair.

As he stood at the exit, Leonardo took one last look at his home then gathering all his will and strength he turned around and ran into the sewers tears streaming from his eyes.

So Leonardo has finally left to go on his journey.

I wanted to make the scene as sad as possible as he was saying goodbye to Mona his brothers and Sensei.

And so, Leonardo's Journey begins.