Chapter Twenty-Seven: A Mother's Love
Inexplicably, Rue found herself standing in front of the sacred tree in the present day.
She had no recollection of how she'd gotten there; the last thing she could remember was... well, actually, nothing at all. That thought was an empty void. Somehow—within the blink of an eye—the wounds on her stomach had disappeared and she'd felt better than she could ever remember. It was almost as though she'd awakened from a nightmare. Rue thought long and hard about it for a moment, trying to deduce exactly how she had arrived home... but for some reason, there was a fog inside her mind
Then, while she was slowly trying to figure it out, she suddenly realized she was standing on a dock in Feudal Japan.
There had been no transition whatsoever in scenery: she hadn't even noticed that the tree had vanished until a minute afterwards.
"Look at that sunset," a voice suddenly whispered, threading through the air; when Rue turned her head, she spotted an unfamiliar girl with extremely long black hair standing in front of a familiar white-haired boy. She was wearing a red and white priestess kimono, but even though she was staring at the sunset with somber eyes, a small smile had graced her soft lips. Then she turned her eyes on Inuyasha, and the two of them hugged; Rue slowly blinked her eyes as the image rippled and started fading. "Inuyasha..."
"Kikyo..." the half-demon whispered. "My Kikyo..."
Then the world swirled and faded out to a new scene.
This place had a sunset that seemed to be completely ablaze with color, vast green hills and crumbling castles. The sky above had been set on fire: hues of yellow, orange, amber, amethyst, and pink kissed the sky as the incandescent sun peered over the horizon. A warm breeze gently rolled by, lifting her long silver hair off her shoulders.
The breeze brought with it the scent of new life.
Inexplicably feeling a pain that buried itself into the deepest part of her heart and soul, Rue turned her back on the land before her and started to walk away from the rolling hills. However, the instant she looked up, she froze.
"—aru-chan...?" a Japanese voice called, making the five people standing right in front of her dissolve. "Miharu-chan, are you okay?"
"No..." the girl whined, wincing as the dull throbbing in her chest broke her out her nightmare. "Don't go... not now..."
"Miharu-chan, wake up," Nanami's voice gently sighed. "You need to wake up."
The girl felt something gentle and cold moving against her upper torso.
She followed the repetitive movements over her skin with her mind, but she couldn't understand what was happening. She wanted to open her eyes, but they seemed to be glued shut and she couldn't make them work. Rue could hear voices speaking somewhere, but they were incoherent and undefined since her hearing was still nullified from her immobile state.
"I just don't understand how she survived," Sango murmured, sounding thoroughly amazed. "That blade pierced her clean to the other side of her body."
"I'm actually more concerned with how much power she let loose after receiving such a wound," Saelind muttered gruffly; the albino gave a mental frown, instantly wondering when he'd arrived and how he'd been introduced to her friends. "The fact that she did so on her last store of energy... it's more than just a little frightening."
"Her wounds are healing so fast I can see her skin moving," Miroku stated grimly. "I've never seen anything like it in my entire life... unless you count... beings like Naraku."
"DON'T YOU EVER COMPARE MIHARU TO THAT MONSTER!" Nanami instantly shrieked, flying over to the monk and gripping his robes with rage in her eyes; Rue twitched and struggled to move, but her energy was still failing her. "NEVER, EVER! Naraku is an abomination that absorbs the flesh of others to regenerate himself! He steals other lives to heal his body! Miharu is different! She heals because it's a natural part of her own, individual existence! ALL demons have that power!"
"Okay!" Miroku exclaimed, pushing the woman off of him and shaking out his robes. "I understand... what I said was wrong. Miharu-san is nothing like him."
"That doesn't change the fact that she has some pretty incredible abilities," Saelind sighed, trying to soothe the blonde woman. "I noticed it a long while back, you know... when we were leaving the cavern village."
Nanami froze, then looked at him.
"What do you mean?" she asked, lowering her fists. "What exactly are you saying?"
"I don't think even we realized just how angry she was," Saelind growled, closing his eyes with a grim expression. "After she lost control of herself and expelled all of that earth-shattering power... Miharu still managed to freeze an entire river by merely lifting her hand. No effort whatsoever was put into it, either. Personally, I think we've just seen what that girl can do if she's really trying."
A shaken silence followed that statement.
"Feh," Inuyasha finally grunted, sounding thoroughly pissed off. "I'll admit that she wasn't bad... for once... but when is the little runt gonna wake up? It's been a whole day!"
"I'm not a runt, dog-breath," Rue finally mumbled, scowling a bit; the speakers jumped back when she slowly opened her eyes and blinked the grogginess away. After a few moments, the girl weakly attempted to sit up and cautiously felt her chest, slowly running her hand over the spot where she'd been stabbed. She'd been bandaged up, but even though the rags were bloodstained, she didn't feel as bad as she should have. "Um... good morning?"
"H-how in the… what did you…" Kagome spluttered, apparently at a loss for words. "How are you—?"
"I'm fine, Kagome-chan," Rue interrupted, giving her a somber look; the black-haired girl instantly caught on to the fact that she didn't want to talk about anything concerning Naraku for a while. "I don't really get why, but I'm feeling better now... I'm even a bit hungry."
"You'd better be," Inuyasha irritably snorted. "That boy from your time is still out there. I still have no idea why you'd kiss a freak like him, though... yuck."
In a flash of white, Rue's hair billowed around and a loud slap filled the air.
When everyone spotted her, she was on her feet in front of Inuyasha.
Her hand had been extended, and the half-demon had a huge welt on his face.
He looked stunned for a moment, then thoroughly pissed.
"What the hell was that for?!" he barked, glaring up at her. "Why did ya hit me?!"
"Never bring him up again in front of me," Rue quietly spat, glowering down at him with such a venomous expression that he flinched backwards and blinked; everyone in the room drew back as well since they'd never seen her so angry. "Never let the topic of that boy touch your lips again. Period."
When she lowered her arm and Inuyasha's gaze shifted lower, his face unexpectedly flamed bright red. Sango gasped and slapped her hands over Miroku's eyes when the girl turned to look at Saelind, who pointedly closed his eyes and turned his back to her.
Rue blinked in confusion before she looked down at herself.
What she saw didn't exactly make sense to her groggy mind.
She stared with uncomprehending yellow eyes, lifting a hand and touching the hair that was resting against her skin... but when she finally made the connection, the girl let out a scream that forced everyone to cover their ears. Clutching her arms over her bare breasts and falling to her knees, Rue frantically began to shriek incoherent insults.
She was stark raving naked.
"Miharu-chan, calm down!" Kagome cried, wincing when the girl's shrieks filled the hut. "You'll open your wounds again! Plus, Shippo and the other villagers are sleeping!"
"Yeah, keep it quiet!" Inuyasha complained, lazily covering his own ears with a disgruntled yawn. "You're gonna blow out my eardrums!"
"Shut up!" Rue shrieked angrily, huddling into a ball so nobody could see her body. "Pervert! Pervert! Pervert!"
"Quit calling me that!" Inuyasha snapped, glaring at her. "I'm not even interested in you! Who cares if you're naked in front of me? It's not like I'm paying any attention!"
"Oh, really?" Rue retorted defiantly, weakly standing up and brazenly planting her hands on her hips. "If that's the case, you should be able to look right at me, then!"
The demon's eyes went wide and he turned away with a startled hitch in his breath.
She tapped her foot expectantly.
"Oh, my... Miharu!" Miroku gasped in delight, trying to see through Sango's trembling fingers. "You need to learn some morals!"
"See, what'd I tell you?!" Rue shrieked, clamping her arms over her body and falling to her knees again; her enormous wings were soon enfolded around her torso like a shield of feathers. "You can't even look at me straight when I'm standing like this, pervert, so don't even try saying there's nothing wrong with it!"
"How about a little embarrassment with your anger, you prepubescent brat?" Inuyasha shouted, muscles still unbelievably rigid from the shock of seeing a teenage girl standing naked in front of him. "Show some common morality already!"
"Excuse me?!" Rue shrieked, eyes widening in outrage. "I am not prepubescent, you creepy pedophile!"
"Who are you calling a pedophile, you exhibitionist?!" Inuyasha squawked, frustration building up to the point where he wanted to blow his top. "Show some self respect!"
Kagome, Nanami, and Sango watched the two of them bicker back and forth for several minutes. However, when Inuyasha leapt to his feet and tried to tackle the girl, Kagome drew the line and closed her eyes with a calm expression.
"Inuyasha," the girl stated simply, sipping her cup of tea with a nonchalant expression. "SIT!"
"UWAGH!" the half-demon yelped, slamming face-first into the floor. "Ow... Kagome... what was that for?!"
"For being a pervert and stressing Miharu-chan out. Now, everyone, get out!" the black-haired girl muttered, finally getting to her feet; after pushing Saelind, Miroku, and Inuyasha out the door, she grabbed a spare wing-harness and one of Rue's school uniforms before holding them out to the shivering albino. "Here, Rue... put these on and don't worry about a thing. Your mother hasn't woken up yet, but I'm sure she'll want to see you first thing in the morning. She was so worried..."
"Yeah…" Rue mumbled, shrugging the harness on before pulling on her clothes one piece at a time; she blinked when she realized just how weak her limbs felt, though, and she slowly shook her head. "Then again... somehow, I don't think it's a good idea for me to see her right now."
"What?" Kagome, Nanami, and Sango all asked simultaneously. "Why?"
"She saw everything when I lost it..." the albino dully explained. "She probably won't want anything to do with me after what happened with Naraku."
"What's with you being so gloom and doom?" Kagome asked, frowning at her. "You beat Naraku and saved your mother, so... why do you sound upset?"
"Well, isn't it hopeless for me to go back home the way I am?" Rue shot back, making her friend fall silent. "And if my mother is here... isn't she stuck here, too?"
"Look…" Kagome muttered, shaking her head. "I'm very, very happy that you trust us enough to confide in us, but there's someone else you need to talk to before jumping to conclusions."
"Who?" Rue asked, blinking at her in surprise.
"Your mother," Kagome replied seriously. "Obviously."
The albino girl paled and was about to let out a protest, but she stopped since she couldn't really disagree.
"You're right," Rue muttered; they became silent for a while, but her three friends frowned a little when she eventually smiled at them halfheartedly. "Kagome... if my mother... you know, really doesn't want anything to do with me... will you... y'know... be there so I can have a... a... shoulder?"
Kagome merely blinked in confusion at her subtle play of words.
However, since Sango and Nanami were older and instantly understood, they earnestly nodded their heads.
"We'll be here," Nanami fretfully exclaimed. "I'll hold you tightly and not let go until you wish me to do so. I doubt that would happen, though... after all, a mother's love is something very powerful, Miharu-chan: the bond between a parent and her child can only be broken by something as complete as death. And even then, it never fully fades away."
"Yeah... so don't worry," Kagome murmured, looking at the severely downtrodden albino. "If you want to see her, your mother is in the next hut over."
"Okay... but, I... I need some fresh air, first," Rue sighed, shaking her head in dismay. "I feel... extremely weak, and I want to breathe better."
So saying, she stood up and left everyone to their thoughts.
"Do you really think she'll be okay?" Kagome asked, glancing at the older women with nervous eyes. "When Tachibana-san woke up that one time, she seemed..."
"Like she'd gone into shock," Sango finished, staring at the wall with a worried expression. "We gave Miharu-chan the right nudge... all we need to do now is wait."
"You're forgetting something," Nanami pointed out, giving a smile that many beings normally wouldn't see on a full-blooded demon's face; both Sango and Kagome stared at her in surprise, since her jade green eyes were sparkling. "You girls are young... so you might not understand any of this, but... I meant what I said."
"What do you mean?" Kagome asked, hooking a strand of hair behind her ear. "Care to explain?"
"A mother's love can't be broken, even in death," Nanami murmured, setting a gentle hand against her breast. "I know... because I was actually a mother once."
Sango and Kagome instantly straightened up, staring at her.
"Really?" the demon slayer inquired. "You mean... you have a family."
Her smile saddened and her eyes glimmered, freckled cheeks pale and blonde lashes hiding the pain residing within her irises.
"I did once... long ago," she quietly explained, not looking at them. "They were lost to me a long time ago."
Sango's eyes flickered with recognition.
"I'm sorry," she sighed, setting a hand on the blonde's arm. "I understand."
"If that woman breaks Miharu's heart," Nanami muttered, lifting her eyes to the moon, "I'll never forgive her."
"Eh?" Kagome whispered, instantly drawing back with a reserved expression. "Wait, you don't think that Tachibana-san... would actually disown her or anything, right?"
"Only time will tell," Sango muttered, looking up at the stars. "I really do hope things go well for them, though. I've seen enough families broken because of Naraku... I truly hope this won't be one of them."
None of them realized that Rue herself was listening to their conversation with shadowed eyes. She clutched her aching shoulder with a sigh, then pulled her shirt down and looked at the barely-healed scar that had been carved into her flesh.
Ever since she'd merged with Ria... her body had healed at a bizarrely rapid rate.
Every single injury that had been inflicted on her from that point on had disappeared.
That is, aside from the ones given prior to the merging.
For some reason, her shoulder refused to fully heal itself... but she had grown so used to it that it was easy to keep the pain from showing up on her face. Stepping away from the hut, Rue Thompson walked into the forest and sank down to her knees.
So many confusing and painful things had happened recently.
She truly was beginning to wonder if she was a cursed individual, because every single place she settled down in was befallen by tragedy. Tilting her head back and staring at the sky, she let out a sigh that was covered up by the gust of wind that roared across the clearing. She tilted her head and basked in the sensation.
In that moment, she caught her mother's scent and froze.
Her eyes widened and started shining, finding this to be a peculiarly strange sensation.
So this was what her Mom smelled like... floral spices, warm milk, and the baby's breath flower. It was a warm smell... a smell that reminded her of home. Rue stood up and followed the smell throughout the sleeping village, dazedly moving forward until she found herself walking into the forest. She followed the trail with her eyes closed... but then, without warning, her eyes opened and she found herself standing in the middle of a clearing. A familiar woman with braided waist-length brown hair was standing in front of the sacred tree.
Her eyes widened and began to sparkle from the inside out.
She had found her... the one person she had been longing for even more than she'd longed for Sesshomaru.
The one person she'd thought she would never see again.
The one that had come back.
"O-Oka-san?" Rue whispered, making the Asian woman in front of her jump and whirl around with a start. "Oka-san... it's really you?!"
"M-Miharu-chan?" the woman asked, staring at her with startled eyes before lifting a bruised hand to her cheek. "My... I'm having the weirdest dream. I didn't expect you to be in such a place!"
"Oka-san!" Rue whimpered, running over and throwing her arms around the woman's middle. "Oka-san! Oka-san! It's you, it's really you! You're alive!"
"Miharu-chan?! What are you doing?!" the woman exclaimed, touching her shoulders with startled eyes. "Of course I'm alive! Why wouldn't I be?"
"It's a long story... but Oka-san, this isn't a dream!" the girl whispered, looking up at her mother's confused brown eyes. "This is all real!"
"Eh?" the woman whispered, staring at her in confusion. "Miharu, what do you mean? This can't be real! It's all just a dream, right?"
"Just listen to me, please!" Rue stammered, grasping her hand. "There are so many things I need to tell you! So many things I want to say... please, listen!"
"What on earth is going on with you?!" Mizuki cried, unexpectedly gripping the girl's shoulders and shaking her a little with a frantic expression. "Are you in some type of danger or something? Is this a premonition? Please, tell me! What happened to you on the day of the field trip?! Who took you?! As your mother, tell me!"
"It's a long story, and half of it I'm still having trouble believing myself, even though I personally went through the experiences," Rue instantly whispered, touching the woman's hands with shaking fingers; she felt as though she were going to cry, and her muscles were shaking violently. "A lot of things happened to me. You don't want to know."
"Tell me!" the woman sighed, staring at her with a confused expression. "I do want to know!"
Rue merely nodded and closed her eyes.
Mizuki immediately pulled the frail-looking girl into her arms and started running her hands through her hair. The teenager blinked like a startled owl, but then she relaxed and returned the embrace. She could already feeling her worries and fears melting away. Even though Ms. Tachibana had adopted her… this woman was her mother.
Rue genuinely loved her.
She had given her the one thing so many others had denied.
A home.
And that one simple fact gave her just enough faith to explain everything, from being dragged into the past, merging with a demon, finding out that she was a powerful reincarnation, the abilities she had developed, and even how she was struggling to find a way to return home. The home that wasn't a part of this time frame.
Rue had made her decision: she was going to tell her mother everything.
"If you really want to know," Rue whispered, gently shrugging off the embrace and looking her in the eyes, "I will show you the truth."
When her mother blinked at her, the pale girl stepped back and shakily started undoing her red neck-scarf. For a moment, Mizuki looked extremely confused by her actions, but when she managed to shrug off her upper clothes, her eyes went blank with confusion.
Rue shivered before averting her gaze.
The belts that had been wrapped around her upper torso had obviously caught the woman's attention.
"Why on earth are you wearing something like that?" Mizuki instantly asked, hesitantly stepping forward with her arm held out; Rue instantly shied away from her hands and hugged herself with shaking arms. "Hey! Come on, let me see!"
"That's what I'm doing…" Rue weakly retorted, shakily lifting her hands and undoing the clasps; when her mother stared at her with confused brown eyes, Rue's fingers faltered and she paused... hesitating for about a minute. "Hey, Oka-san? Hypothetically... if I wasn't... normal... like you and I had always thought… would you still... love me? I mean, w-would you still care about me even if... even if I was... a freak?"
"How could you even ask that?! You're not a freak!" her mother snapped, speaking with an expression of hurt and disbelief. "I could never not love you, Miharu-chan! You're my daughter! I chose you! I knew from the moment I saw you sitting alone in that playroom that I wanted you! You're my child, so just tell me what this is all about, all right?"
"O-okay... I'm... happy, but..." Rue shakily whispered, squeezing her eyes shut and flicking off the clasps, "but... things are different now."
"Eh?" Mizuki asked, soft brown eyes went blank when the belts slid to the ground with a soft jingling noise. "What do you mean, Miharu? Nothing is really different... right?"
However, only a second later… Rue's enormous feathered wings unfurled at the joints with a small ruffling sound. Sliding open around her slender body, the wings spread themselves wide before she flapped them and folded them around her like a cloak.
"Oka-san..." Rue whispered, hugging herself with trembling arms. "I'm not… your perfect little girl anymore. I've turned into something... strange. And I don't know how to handle it. Oka-san, what am I supposed to do?"
When Rue opened her eyes, she looked at the woman who had adopted her.
Her heart skipped a beat, and her eyes went blank.
All she saw was disbelieving shock and fear.
"It... wasn't a dream," the woman whimpered, mouth trembling with fright as she backed off a step. "What I saw... your injuries... and then... you... it was real..."
"Oka-san?" Rue asked, lifting a hand with a shaken expression. "Wait... it was, but..."
When the girl tried to touch her, the woman flinched away from her pale fingers.
"Stay back!" Mizuki shrieked, covering her mouth with both hands and staring at her in horror; Rue jerked her arm back and stared at her with huge eyes. "Get back! You're a monster! Someone, please! Help me! I've been corned by a monster! HELP!"
Rue recoiled backwards a few steps and felt her heart jolt, eyes immediately losing their sheen.
Monster? the pale girl silently whispered, heart breaking into pieces that slowly tinkled away into the darkness within her soul. That's what she thinks I am...?
"Oka-san?" the albino whimpered, lifting her hand again; the woman jerked away yet again and rapidly backed away, eyes large and full of fright. "Oka-san, wait! It's me! I'm not a monster! I'm still Miharu Tachibana! I'm not a monster! I'm not, I swear!"
"Liar!" the woman screeched, backing away from her. "I saw you! You were stabbed through the heart and turned into a monster! I saw it with my own two eyes! Now it all makes sense... everyone who adopted you always suffered some sort of misfortune, but now it makes sense! You must have done something to them! Get away from me!"
Rue's face instantly screwed up and her eyes filled with tears that she desperately tried to hide. She once again attempted to move forward, but now her head was lowered and she was staring at the ground.
"O-Oka-san... please..." Rue croaked, voice cracking. "Please... I didn't... and I'm not..."
She continued moving forward, then lifted her trembling arms and attempted to embrace Mizuki... to show the woman just how much she cared for her... but before she could so much as raise her eyes, the woman lifted her hand and struck her as hard as she could. Her head was sent flying to the side with such a sharp jerk that her neck cracked.
Stumbling backwards, the girl clutched her cheek with a stunned expression.
"Get back! Don't touch me!" Mizuki screeched, backing away until she was pressed against a tree. "Someone, help me! I've been cornered by a monster! HELP!"
That was it.
For the second time since the moment she could remember things... it happened.
Everything around her blurred as something hot stung her eyes.
Rue stood there in the center of the clearing, blank yellow eye unresponsive to the world: her mouth was trembling, her eye was watering, and her face had turned so pale that her skin had almost become see-through. Taking in a deep breath, the girl tried to beg her mother to listen again... but only a watery croak slipped out of her mouth. The woman covered her face when she tried again, simply because the same unpleasant sound escaped her lips.
However, after a moment, her expression became lifeless and her shoulders sagged.
The trembling in her mouth stopped... her watering eye slowly glazed over... and slowly but surely, all traces of emotion fled from her.
Slowly tilting her head back and staring at the sky with a vacant expression, the girl watched the clouds drift by without even bothering to pay attention to her surroundings. In that moment, she would have given anything just to be able to fly away like a bird... to escape from everything. Slowly lifting her hand, she reached for those clouds, feeling hollow from the inside out and simply waiting for the anger to fill up the emptiness Mizuki's words had created.
However, no anger came.
In fact, nothing did: there was nothing she could use as a shield this time.
She had no right to feel angry at her mother: she'd deserved every single horrible word that had been said to her. This time, all she could do was let the weight of the pain crush some tears out of her. Closing her eyes and letting her hand fall limply to her side, she spoke.
"You lied..." Rue croaked, making the woman freeze with a startled expression. "You lied to me, Oka-san... you lied right to my face and said you'd still love me. I knew it was a lie, too, but I still tried, because I really do love you... you're my one and only mother, after all."
"SHUT UP!" the woman shrieked, shaking her head. "I'M NOT YOUR MOTHER!"
Something inside her broke for real when those word smashed against her ears.
And after that, she couldn't stop it.
The sting of barely-suppressed tears welled up and the dam inside her burst.
Lifting her hands to her eyes, the tiny girl let out a single, weak-sounding hiccup, which made the woman twitch in wary surprise. Then she let out another... and another... weakly rubbing at her eyes and trying to fight it off all the while. However, she just couldn't keep it locked away anymore: weakly tilting her head back towards the sky, Rue hiccuped a few more times.
Then, face screwing up, she shakily burst into tears.
Her hands rested limply by her sides as she stared up at the sky, crying her eyes out with tears streaming down her face. When her legs buckled and she collapsed, crying almost hysterically, Mizuki immediately backed away. The woman looked rather startled when the girl buried her face in her small hands and jerkily pressed her forehead against the grass.
Her shoulders heaved as she cried, but she no longer cared.
Everything was too much.
She couldn't take it anymore.
It was killing her.
"M-Miharu... chan?" Mizuki whispered, eyes blank with confusion. "You're... crying?"
She couldn't stand to hear that voice: without even bothering to cover up her wings, the albino girl snatched both her harness and her clothes before sprinting in the opposite direction at top speed; her eyes were blurred with the tears gushing from her eyes.
"Miharu-chan, wait!" the woman shrieked. "Come back! I… I… wait!"
No… Rue was done waiting for her mother.
She was done waiting for everyone, period.
She was done waiting for someone to come rescue her... because, in reality, she had always been alone: nobody was going to save her. Nobody was going to come and help her. Nobody would ever truly be there for her. Nobody would ever see her as anything more than a monster. She was a demon... a vile creature in every form of the word.
Her reality was a nightmare she couldn't escape from.
She wasn't human.
She was a monster.
And in the end, she didn't know where to go.
She was confused and she didn't want to think about why her heart felt as though it was being crushed by a large fist. She continued running in an aimless direction, hoping for someone... anyone... but nobody was there. Nobody was there for her... even though she was about to fall again, nobody would be there to pick her up.
"S-Sesshomaru..." she sobbed, blindly stretching her hands out. "Someone..."
Shockingly enough, someone actually crashed into her from behind and smashed her face clean into the ground with a loud howl of victory. For a few seconds, she shook her head and tried to figure out why she was suddenly tasting dirt, but then she was pinned down by her assailant from behind: when the scent of wolf engulfed her nose, she twitched and fought to move her arms. She knew this scent... she knew it pretty well, actually.
"Got you, Inuyasha," a male voice stated in a cocky tone. "I knew you were weak, mutt, but not this weak! Now, where is Kagome...? I've got some proposing to do."
Rue trembled violently, not wanting to make a sound... but the tears continued flowing.
"Ow..." she whispered, rubbing her eyes. "That hurt..."
"Wait... what the hell?!" the voice snorted, sounding alarmed. "You're not Inuyasha!"
Not too far away, a shadow slid out of the darkness and a green eye became visible.
The albino girl twitched when her attacker forcibly rolled her over and backed off a bit before squatting down. When she sat up, she came face to face with none other than Koga, who was staring at her with an irritated smirk. Koga was obviously expecting her to attack him, but not what she actually did... because when Rue shakily crawled forward and clung to the front of his shirt, his cocky expression instantaneously faltered and his body started shaking all over.
"H-hey!" the wolf-demon yelped, staring at her with a threatening expression when she buried her face in his chest. "Are you drunk, half-breed?! Get off me!"
However, his anger faded into total confusion when he realized that the girl was shivering violently. The startled wolf demon plopped down on his backside when she started sobbing against his chest, staring down at the top of her head with wide eyes.
"O-o-o-oi..." Koga stammered, looking extremely uncomfortable. "Seriously, what's wrong with you? I didn't hurt you that bad! Why are you hanging all over me?!""
"Oka-san..." Rue sobbed, eyes squeezed shut. "Oka-san... Oka-san... Oka-san!"
"Uhhh... look, I'm not your Oka-san," Koga droned, voice hitching unbearably high when she sobbed even harder; when she continued crying, he timidly patted her back and tried his best to cope with the situation he'd found himself in. Quite honestly, he'd never seen a woman cry before, not even Kagome, so this experience was actually quite unpleasant for him. "Really, though... I didn't actually hurt you when I hit you like that, did I?"
Rue couldn't answer... she merely kept crying.
"I can't... deal with it anymore..." the girl bawled, hiccuping as she sobbed against his shoulder. "She doesn't… she called me a... I'm just a monster to her! I'm not a human like I've always thought! My Oka-san is right! I'm a freak!"
"Ugh, just be quiet already!" Koga muttered, rolling his eyes. "It'll be all right! Just wean yourself off her tit and go separate ways!"
"How?!" Rue wailed, pushing away from him and lifting her eyes; her mouth trembled as she looked at him, hot tears trickling down her pale cheeks. "I'm alone! I've always been alone, from the very beginning! And someone I love with all of my heart just abandoned me because I'm not human! How will things possibly be okay?! I'm alone again!"
"That's not true," Koga snorted, staring at her shimmering yellow eyes. "You have Kagome and Inuyasha, not to mention those other whacky humans. I don't like you very much, but seeing you like this... I won't deny it. This bugs me."
Rue covered her face with both hands and fought to stop weeping.
Her shoulders shook with the effort... but she couldn't do it.
"You can't understand how I'm feeling," Rue finally choked, dropping her hands and turning her head to look at the moon, ignoring how he bristled in offense. "Demons are different than humans. Even though some of them outwardly look like regular people, on the inside, they aren't. They have more to them, but also... less."
"Yeah?" Koga asked, not really comprehending where she was going. "So what?"
"From what I've been taught," Rue stated simply, not looking at him, "humans feel things on a very profound level, but most demons don't really have much emotional capacity. They don't grow attached to things beyond a certain point. I don't know what I am, exactly, but... my mother is my whole world. She's the person I hold closest to my heart... my best friend... the one who gave me hope when I was lost in darkness."
Wrapping her arms around her middle, Rue closed her eyes as a fresh wash of tears slid down her cheeks.
"And yet, in one instant," she choked, shaking her head, "all of that was destroyed, because she found out that I'm a... a... monster..."
"I don't get it," Koga grunted, sitting back a bit and glaring at her. "Kagome is a human, and she doesn't think you're a monster. Same goes for everyone else in your group."
"Why do you love her so much?" Rue asked in a small voice, glancing at him with a frail expression. "Kagome-san told me once that you proclaimed to have feelings for her... but why is that? When you don't even understand this pain, how can you know love?"
"Well, uh," the wolf-demon stammered, furrowing his brows. "Kagome is one of the few women who ever openly stood by me. She's saved my life on several occasions, and she's always passionate about everything she puts her mind to. She also... has a rare form of kindness about her. I feel as though my restlessness is gone when she's around... in a way, she makes me feel safe."
"Is that so?" Rue sniffled, burying her face in her hands. "How would you feel if Kagome-san ever called you a monster? How would you react if she called for help and screamed that she didn't know you? What would you do if she flinched away from your hands if you tried to touch her, out of nothing but fear of your existence?"
Koga's cerulean eyes instantly went blank and he stared off into space.
His face rapidly turned pale.
Admittedly, the very thought had given him a sick, tight feeling that settled into the core of his belly.
"There's no way Kagome would ever do that!" Koga barked, instantly glaring at the girl with hostile blue eyes. "She's not that kind of woman!"
"Answer the question," Rue commanded, looking at him with hollow eyes; he swallowed when her gaze locked onto his, ears immediately burning with embarrassment. "How would you feel if she ever did that to you?"
"I'd hate it!" the demon growled. "I'd hate every bit of it! It would... hurt!"
"Exactly," Rue whispered, looking back up at the moon again. "Now you know what's wrong... because, in truth, that's what just happened to me."
"Eh?" Koga asked, eyes widening as he made the connection; he hated admitting it, but he'd never really thought about how certain feelings could create a mutual sense of understanding between two different people. "Why are you going through so much trouble to explain this stuff to me? You're on Inuyasha's side, aren't you?"
"I'm not on anybody's side," Rue droned, feeling her insides icing over. "I just hate violence... it's stupid and petty. I want everyone to get along peacefully."
"You're a weird woman," Koga muttered, rolling his eyes. "That's just the way this world works, you know? It's fight or die... that's how things have always been since peace never lasts."
His ears twitched when he heard his lackeys calling for him to slow down.
After a moment, he lifted his eyes to the crying girl staring at the moon.
"Take care of yourself," he stated firmly, looking at her with a sigh. "And don't be crying next time I see you, Silverlocks: I don't wanna feel guilty while I'm gettin' even for those insults you threw at me. Especially since you get clingy when you're upset."
"You're leaving?" Rue asked, looking at him with a weak expression. "Now?"
"Yeah," he chuckled, flashing her a cocky grin. "Later."
Without even missing a beat, he took off running, rapidly disappearing from sight in a whirlwind of dust. Rue lowered her eyes and closed them yet again, trying to prevent the tears from sliding through any further. But they wouldn't stop flowing.
They continued dripping off of her white lashes as she sat there on her knees.
"I never would have believed it had I not seen it," a deep voice suddenly murmured. "A powerful creature like you... perhaps you do feel."
Rue didn't even twitch.
She merely sat there, feeling broken, unable to do anything more.
"Why are you here?" the girl whispered. "Why...?"
"I sensed something strange, so I followed my instincts and wound up here," the deep voice retorted. "I don't know why you thought masking your presence would prevent me from figuring out who you are, but whatever your reasons, it didn't work."
A cold wind swept through the grass, lifting her hair away from her back.
Rue opened her eyes and slowly turned her head, looking over her shoulder.
When she met the gaze of the broad-shouldered redhead leaning against a tree not too far behind her, his eye twitched before narrowing. His snakelike pupil was as fierce and hostile as ever, but for some reason, Rue didn't feel afraid of him any longer.
"I apologize," she stated weakly, attempting to give a smile and failing miserably. "A lot has happened since I last saw you."
His eye twitched a second time when more tears slid down her cheeks and he unfolded his arms before stalking up to her. With a burning glare, he looked down on her.
"Why do you return here?" he demanded coldly. "Leaving behind nothing but a note... and an insulting one at that. I thought you were brave for being forward enough to blatantly insult me. So tell me... if you're brave, why are crying alone in the dark?!"
Rue's face screwed up and she hiccuped, mouth trembling.
"I can't help it," she stammered, looking directly into his lime green eye. "I'm not as strong as you! I can't just act like things don't hurt me anymore!"
In that moment, he realized for the first time just how large her eyes were... eyes that completely revealed her heart, which held things he didn't understand. His face blanked out and he stared at her with a startled expression, green eye widening.
In that instant, his heart skipped a beat.
Then his eye softened and he let out an irritated sigh.
"Stupid woman," he grumbled, kneeling down and lifting her into his arms. "Why am I even bothering with this?"
Cradling her in his arms, he whirled and started trotting back towards Kaede's village.
It wasn't too far from them, so it didn't really take much time for Reiji to make it.
A single tear dripped off Rue's cheek and landed on the ground when the half-demon leapt down in front of Kaede's hut. He held her tightly for a moment, then let out a sigh and chanced a glance at her face.
She wasn't crying as much as before, but for some reason, her eyes had gone cold.
Mouth twisting, he grumpily set the girl on her feet.
"Thanks for carrying me back," Rue mumbled, bowing her head before she turned away and wiped her eyes. "I... don't think I would have made it back tonight if you hadn't."
"It was nothing," he grunted, stalking away from her with a taught jaw. "Don't thank me for it. I still don't trust you... just because I was kind this once doesn't mean things have changed between the two of us, woman."
Rue merely stood there for several minutes after he leapt into the trees, rubbing her watering eyes with both hands in an attempt to stop the tears. Before she could, however, Inuyasha jerked the flap back and looked around, sword already drawn.
"I smell the stench of wolf," he growled, looking around with the Tessaiga held out in front of him. "Miharu, did you see anything strange while you were out here?"
The silver-haired girl didn't answer the question... nor did she turn around. Her lack of a response made the half-demon scowl. He figured it was because of their little spat earlier, judging by the rigidness of her shoulders; several minutes passed, but she made no move to look at him... nor did she seem inclined to tell him anything.
"Hey!" Inuyasha finally snapped, grabbing the small girl's shoulder and jerking her around in a circle. "I'm talking to you! Why don't you... huh?"
The half-demon's golden eyes widened with a start when he saw the tears on her face.
Her long hair swirled around her face with the motion of his actions.
Her mask was no longer in place when she met his gaze.
It was the first time that he had ever seen Rue show so much emotion. Her eyes were shimmering with something awful... there was so much pain flickering within those glistening yellow irises that he didn't even know how to react.
It was like he'd been kicked clean in the stomach.
"Oh... h-hey, Inuyasha," Rue shakily chuckled, frantically trying to smile at him even though more tears streamed down her cheeks; when the half-demon's eyes widened even further, she rubbed her face and laughed at herself. "Um... sorry, I don't know what's come over me all of a sudden. It's so weird... why am I crying?"
"Are you all right?" Inuyasha asked, hesitantly sheathing his blade and suspiciously poking her arm. "You aren't feelin' sick or somethin', are ya?"
"No," Rue sighed, looking at him with a grin that wasn't all there. "I'm fine... I'm probably just tired after using that much power. Plus... I've had a long night."
"Get some rest then, Idiot!" the hanyou barked, smacking the back of her head and shoving her into the hut. "You shouldn't even be walking yet! Go lie down!"
She was relieved that his dense personality had prevented him from looking beneath the surface of her feelings. Without saying anything else, she lowered her eyes and headed right past him, long hair swirling behind her.
For the rest of that night, the girl remained huddled under the futon that she'd been given and did nothing but cry. However... even though she had always held her tears back, pretending that they weren't real... she finally came to the conclusion that shedding her suppressed tears did nothing to relieve the pain inside her.
Her tears... were meaningless.
They couldn't change anything.
They couldn't fix her problems.
Shed or unshed, in the end, she was always crying alone.
And she hated herself for it.
