*deep breath*
Yes, this is an update. You guys are all so brilliant and honestly, I don't deserve you. This is the second time I've lost my files for this story. I was cocky and bold, thinking I wouldn't have to keep backing it up. I was reaching down the rabbit hole for reviews and follows and favourites… and I fell. And what's down there? Hell.
I struggle with a lot of things in my life, and I took to this site to write, to vent my feelings into words so I would never have to turn to something much worse.
This is a new me, I swear, and I'm never taking you all for granted. You like my writing? Well you're going to get it. Prepare to have your emails spammed with update notifications, as there's no way I'm giving up on this now.
(And to the person who told be to just update already? You've inspired quite a lot for this story, along with something else. You'll never know what it is, you'll never know my opinion about your review, or why I took it the way I did. But you inspired something, so I guess I have to thank you.)
And to all of you who wrote the encouragement? Thank-you. Shit happens, and I shouldn't even give a damn about it.
Enjoy the chapter—
Cecily, Tessa could tell, was annoyed. She'd snapped something to Tessa about how she may as well come with them as she wouldn't stay if told, which Tessa agreed with, and had grabbed Tessa by the arm and towed her to the room the younger had just exited. There, she had thrown a square necked top that was a little too low for Tessa's liking, leggings, and converse —all black— to Tessa, telling her to put them on quickly. Tessa had obeyed and had decided not to comment on the fact that the clothes were at least two sizes too small. Although the younger girl had a tiny waist, Tessa's chest was larger, which meant the top didn't fit in any places. Then there was her height to deal with, meaning the leggings were halfway up her calves. Because of her height, her feet were large too.
Tessa hated herself so much right now. She just hoped she wouldn't run into anyone.
"You need a jacket, otherwise you'll probably get ripped to shreds." Cecily commented. "Jem'll have one, come on."
Wait, what?
Ripped to shreds?
Jem?
Oh crap. In this attire, she didn't want to run into anyone, especially her boyfriend's brother— for whom she was currently having mixed feelings for.
Nope. She'd take getting ripped to shreds, thank-you very much. However, one look at Cecily, and especially at the gun on her belt, and Tessa decided against expressing her opinion.
"Cecily, what's even going on?" Tessa asked.
Cecily paused. "It's dangerous, and there's a chance we could all die. Painfully. Throats ripped out so we won't have a chance to scream. No one'll know where we went and will assume us missing. Will won't be coming with us, he'll have to deal with his sister's, his brother's and his girlfriend's death." She looked to Tessa's set expression. "Is there nothing I can do to put you off coming?"
Tessa shook her head, fear burning her up. She was curious and worried— she wanted to know why her friend had a gun on her belt and knives in her hair.
They went up the stairs to the converted attic but not all the way down to the opposite side of the house— which was Will's room. Instead, Cecily went to the first door and opened it without knocking.
"Jem?" She called, entering the room. Tessa followed.
"Cecily?" Came a confused answer, as Jem stepped out of what Tessa thought was a closet. She was now ninety per cent sure it was walk-in, otherwise Jem would just be sat in a tiny space. And with his height, Tessa doubted that was happening.
"Ah, finally coming out of the closet, are we?" Cecily asked him. "I guess 'the thing' with Will didn't end last year." She sighed. "Still. You sing, dance and cook, so I'm not surprised that—"
"Cecily. I am quite definitely straight." Jem told her, taking in the appearance of the two, his cheeks colouring when he saw Tessa, who blushed also. The top was too small, she couldn't help it being rather tight in some places. "Why are the two of you in gear?" He asked Cecily.
"Tessa's not technically in gear yet. Do you have a jacket from last year that you could lend her?" Cecily asked. "I mean, not to be rude, but it would fit her."
Tessa frowned, about to comment on the fact that she wasn't fat and that it wasn't her fault she was one of those girls who actually ate lunch, before thinking back to the photograph's on Will's wall. Jem was quite definitely thinner last year— that was for sure.
Jem's eyes darkened, but he nodded, opening the wardrobe and gesturing the two in after him. "You didn't answer my question." He pointed out.
Whilst Cecily explained, Tessa looked around. It was a very small walk-in wardrobe, not much larger than an actual closet, but nevertheless, walk-in. There was a dresser and a wardrobe on one side of the small walk-in, and on the other side was an array of instruments.
Tessa scoffed. Sure. Whatever. So he could evidently play violin and viola. But there was only what—a size difference? Pah. And then there were the guitars: electric and non-electric. One just looked more hard-core and they sounded different. That was all. A ukulele was present too. But that was just a small guitar. There was also something that looked like a squashed guitar and a violin put together.
You know how many instruments that was? Two. Two and a half if you counted the squashed guitar/violin.
You know what Tessa could play? Recorder. Very well. She knew three songs fluently, having been taught them in early middle school when she'd taken up lessons. Did she see a recorder anywhere? No. Therefore, she was more musically talented than Jem.
Grinning to herself like a maniac, she turned to face the others and froze at what she saw plastering the walls. They were images —very rough sketches done in charcoal— but there were so many of them. Obsidian eyes, sharp lips, a shaded tall, slender figure, a face, a whole person, a cruel smile, high-heeled boots, every angle and feature was plastered onto the walls. But with the manner it was drawn, Tessa knew Jem hadn't been drawing a model. Especially since there were variations. The woman with a shadow behind her of a terrifying beast. Blood staining wooden floors, a couple bound to chairs with chain— this was something she'd seen before in various films. Drawings of the monster that haunted them at night in their wardrobe. "The monster in the wardrobe." Tessa said softly.
Jem heard her. "You needn't pay attention to those." He told her.
Tessa looked to him. "Why?" Why have you got a nightmare plastering your walls?
Jem knew what she was asking about. "Yanluo." He informed her. His voice was quieter when he spoke again. "People had no idea. They just told me to 'get over it'." A dagger hit a drawing of the woman straight in the chest.
Tessa jumped and realised Jem had thrown the knife. He had a group of them on his belt.
"You don't just get over something like that." He sighed quietly, before snapping into business and handing her a jacket.
Tessa swallowed. "Nice throw." She said finally.
Cecily laughed dryly. "He's the best throw in our group." She informed Tessa. "Now come on." She snapped her fingers. "Business."
"What is it?" Jem asked her as the trio descended the stairs. Jem and Cecily turned suddenly to the door of Will's room, before casting a glance at each other, filled with disbelief.
Tessa sighed in annoyance. She was getting her hearing checked out, ASAP. Evidently the others had heard something.
"He wouldn't." Cecily said with an air of confidence, before continuing to descend the stairs and answer Jem's earlier question, Jem and Tessa following her decent. "Nothing major. Just one measly Shax member skulking around." She scowled. "You'd think, as it is Christmas, that if we were called out on business, it would be for something more exciting. I want something we've never faced before, battles we win but with a war to overcome*. Not," she looped her fingers into her belt, "a gang member on a walk."
"I agree with you that it's nothing particularly exciting, but nothing major is definitely wrong. Shax aren't particularly law-breakers, that's why it's harder for us to subdue them. With moloch or ravener it's a lot easier: they're always in fights or theft— they're just up to no good. Shax aren't technically doing anything wrong, it's not illegal to find out information— within reason." Jem pointed out. "Besides from that, we'll have to find out who hired them to do some dirty work. And that is when it gets interesting."
There was silence. Tessa was processing the information, trying to make sense of it. Jem and Cecily were merely lost in thought.
"Who's coming tomorrow, from your family?" Cecily asked.
Jem ran a hand through his hair and sighed. "I think everyone. Elias is, most definitely. Colette will probably go with the Verlac's, which is a shame, as when she's around, Elias actually pretends to like me—"
"He does like y—" Cecily went to cut in.
"Of course. And whilst we're at it, we may as well point out that Will is illiterate and is secretly in love with Gabriel."
Tessa snorted. Cecily glared at Jem.
"Alistair will of course be attending, possibly Cordelia, and in a very unlikely case: Emma." Jem finished.
"Emma's parents recently died, though. Surely she'd want to pay her respects—" Cecily pointed out.
Jem looked down. Cecily cursed mentally as she reminded herself that Emma's parents were his aunt and uncle. "Of course she does. But she's too young to bless the soil."
"Who's doing it for your family?" Cecily asked. "Have you finally decided?"
Jem gave a bitter laugh. "I'm foreign. My blood's 'tainted', there's no way Elias would allow me near my uncle's grave and my ancestors. Probably wouldn't be allowed to do so with my father's, either. Alistair and Cordelia are too young, so Elias will most likely be doing it."
Cecily sighed. "I'm doing it this time." Jem looked at her and opened his mouth. "No, I am. I don't care. I never paid my respects to Ella, or to anyone else." She paused. "Mam and Pa are coming this year."
"And you and Will are alright with that?" Jem asked. "You know you can't talk to them, right?"
Cecily nodded. "I know. But I just want to see them." She sighed. "Will doesn't know yet. I don't know how he'll react."
"Doubt he'll take it lightly." Jem predicted as they opened the door.
"I know." Cecily repeated. "But hanging 'round with you has made me think that perhaps I shouldn't take family for granted."
"…" There was an uncomfortable silence.
"No," Jem said finally, his voice quiet, "you shouldn't."
"Finally!" Gabriel cried, exasperated. "What the hell took you so long…?" He trailed off when he saw Tessa. Then he shrugged, not even sighing. "Whatever. If she dies, it's your fault." His words were uncaring as he looked up to Jem, who was regarding Gabriel with mutual dislike. Gabriel's large green eyes, so reminiscent of Clary's, fell upon her. "Try not to fall behind when we're walking." He told her.
Tessa gave a 'humph' at his words and stalked ahead, chin jutted in the air, uncaring that she didn't even know which direction the group would be going.
"Tessa!" Jem called after her.
Tessa clenched her jaw. He didn't need to be so protective of her right now, she was hardly going to die.
"Tessa!" Jem repeated, a note of distinct warning in his tone.
Tessa still ignored him, resulting in her promptly walking into a stick.
A girl walks into a heavy-metal bar. Ouch.
As crappy as the joke was, Tessa had to admit it was true. She was winded— she'd given a gasp before glancing down to see the road non-existent below her.
Plumbers were fitting new pipes, and she'd almost accidently walked into the hole in the pavement, stopped only by a thin, green stick, held by Jem.
Tessa felt her cheeks blush in mortification and she stepped back from the roadworks. Jem relaxed his stick, which she could now see to be a cane that looked oddly familiar.
"Um… thanks, I guess." She told him, turning to walk to the car the others had stopped beside.
She paused when she felt a hand lightly touch her arm, sending a jolt of electricity through her. She looked at the hand, and then at its owner. And, all too predictably, she became lost in those bronze eyes of his.
"Tessa; I didn't hurt you, did I?" He asked. His pupils were dilated in worry, his voice caring, soft as velvet.
Tessa was surprised by how much he cared. "No, erm… no. I… you saved me a lot of embarrassment, so… thanks, I guess."
"If you're sure." He said, his hand lingering just about long enough to make her blush, before he dropped it.
The two entered the seven-seater car. The brothers, whom she knew to be Cyril and Thomas, sat in the front. Cecily, Gabriel, and Gideon were sat next, in that order. Jem and Tessa were placed in the very back.
"Will you be attending tomorrow?" Jem asked Tessa calmly as the car set off.
"Um… remind me what's tomorrow?" She asked, confused by Jem. Sometimes, most of the time really, he'd be so formal and polite. She'd become used to the times he wasn't, when he was with Will and/or Cecily.
She'd never met someone as eloquent as Jem. Will was clearly the better speaker: he was quick-witted and sharp, he always had the right punchline and always had the right speech.
Jem was different. He seemed to put a lot of thought into his words before he spoke them as if we were weighing out the outcomes of what would happen if he spoke, meaning his dialogue was always calm and polite.
It also meant he always expected her answer and was never caught off guard. "The tribute to the dead." He said, his tone still the same.
Tessa paused. Tribute to the dead? No, thank-you very much. When she'd become friends with Jem and Will, she'd been expecting a pair of incredibly hot gay men who were always ready and always perfect: happy, content and bubbly.
She'd signed up for unicorns, rainbows and cupcakes, no exaggeration intended.
She had not, had definitely not, been expecting to date one straight man while developing a crush on the other. Expected tragic backstories neither men deserved. And she absolutely did not sign up for tributes to dead people.
However, she didn't voice this. "Is it some kind of mass funeral?"
"No," Jem's voice was even, "not really. It's more like mourning. There's an old cemetery in London, we Shadowhunters call it 'the City of Bones'. Our ancestors were cremated and their ashes used for…" He trailed off. "…Well, you're technically not allowed to know that. But there are countless headstones in London's Bone City for greater shadowhunters— one's who've died in selfless acts— and every Boxing Day, Shadowhunters from across the globe visit."
"Do…" Tessa didn't really know how to word it, "Do your parents…" She trailed off, hoping Jem would understand.
"Have a memorial there?" Jem completed. "Yes, they do."
"Ella does as well." Cecily added from the seat in front of them.
Tessa looked to Jem in confusion as Cecily tuned to the Lightwood's conversation.
"Ella died for Will." Jem said quietly. "And Will still believes that Ella's death is his fault."
Tessa didn't know what else to add to the rather sorrowful topic, so she and Jem lapsed into silence; instead listening to Cecily's and Gabriel's flirting, and Thomas and Cyril arguing over directions.
The car had pulled over to a halt, and the group had got out, Jem around the car and opening Tessa's door for her to help her out before she's even taken her seatbelt off.
Tessa thanked him, looking around the dim street as she exited.
"Where are we?" Tessa asked Jem.
"East end." Jem said, zipping the collar on his biker's jacket up to his neck. "Tottenham, to be rather precise."
Tessa's eyes widened ever-so-slightly. "Is it safe to be here? Not to stereotype or anything, but I thought East End wasn't London's best side."
Jem himself looked slightly wary, but from the laughter of two men behind her, Tessa guessed she was being stupid.
"Won't do ya no good to be worryin'." Tessa turned to see Thomas— or was it Cyril?—laughing alongside his brother.
Someone cleared their throat loudly. Gabriel marched in between the two brothers, his nose in the air haughtily. "Yes, well. Whilst you may be used to these parts, we are not, so let's keep walking, shall we?"
"You ain't scared, are ya?" The other brother asked.
Gabriel sniffed. "Don't be ridiculous. I just think we'd rather—"
"Sure, sure." The same brother said.
"We believe it." The other added.
"Let's keep walking." Gabriel grumbled, marching ahead, followed closely by Cecily and Gideon.
The brothers looked to her. "I oughtn't worry, neither of you. Everyone knows everyone here, place like this. Me and Thomas,"
So it was Cyril talking, Tessa noticed. He had lighter eyes than his brother, and was slightly taller. She'd remember them that way.
", we grew up 'ere. No harm'll come to ya."
They grew up here? Tessa thought. Well, it sure does explain the cockney accent. Everyone else here talks in bloody Queen's English, except from maybe Cecily.
Jem shook his head, smiling slightly. "Shanghai isn't the richest of cities in China, and I grew up there." He reminded the brothers.
"You sure as hell don't act like you did." Thomas commented.
"And you grew up 'n what, a mansion?" Cyril added.
Jem smiled in defeat and began swinging his cane as he walked, evidently relaxed. His cane gave a tap on the pavement which each rotation as it slapped down onto the tarmac.
Gabriel whipped around. "Quit doing that, Carstairs. We need to be ready for an attack at any time; Raziel knows where the Shax are lurking."
"He has a point." His brother added quietly. "What would you do if a Shax jumped at you?"
"This." Jem said easily as a blade shot from his cane, wickedly fast and deadly, shining as the moonlight came out from behind the clouds to cast its light upon them.
Gabriel scowled in defeat. "Put it away."
"But you said I needed to be ready for an attack." Jem pointed out. If it were Will who had said it, it would have been taunting and mocking, yet Jem merely relayed the words back to Gabriel, no sarcasm in his voice.
"No," Gabriel said, his green eyes looking past Jem, his face contorted slightly into a frown. "Look."
Following his gaze, the Tanner brothers, Tessa and Jem turned around to see the shadowy figures of a man and a woman coming towards them quite some distance away. The man wore a baseball cap tilted downwards, casting shadows onto his face, and the woman had her hand linked with his, pale hair down and blowing across her face due to the wind; yet she made no endeavour to brush it away.
"Bit late for a walk, isn't it?" Jem asked, sliding away his blade.
Cyril and Thomas drew guns from their belts.
"They probably think the same about us?" Tessa suggested. The sentence wasn't phrased as a question, but it sure did sound like one.
"Um…" Cecily began, "shouldn't you guys hide your guns in the presence of pedestrians?"
Cyril and Thomas cracked a crooked smile each. "Anyone 'round 'ere out this late ain't never not seen no gun before."
Everyone out this late around here is used to guns, Tessa translated in her head.
Gabriel sighed, turning on his heel and marching the group forwards.
They'd split off into groups. Cyril, Gideon and Gabriel had gone off together, meaning that Tessa, Jem, Cecily and Thomas made up the second.
So far, neither group had found the Shax, though Thomas had received a call from his brother. The first group had found the body of a fourteen year old girl— Emma Bayliss— dead in an alley. She'd been stabbed, a misericord ('a hunting dagger', Jem had told her) a few meters away. Thomas had sworn. He'd known the girl, she was the daughter of his friend's sister.
They'd been out for around an hour and three quarters and the groups were calling it quits, they would be meeting by the car.
And that was where the problem was. The woman from earlier was sitting on the bonnet of the car, the man standing beside her.
Thomas had called out, yelling them for to get off his car. The woman did get up, but only to stand next to the man, both having gone eerily still.
"Do they look odd to you?" Tessa asked Cecily.
Cecily said nothing, but her eyes narrowed in confusion.
"I mean, who stands so perfectly still like that?" Tessa continued.
"Anyone looking for a fight." Jem said quietly, walking over to the couple with his usual calm grace. He'd barely made two steps before the couple moved to go forwards.
Thomas and Cecily relaxed and levelled themselves with Jem, Tessa following, before they found their path blocked by the couple, who'd smartly stepped in front of them.
Jem snaked his hand around Tessa's wrist tightly in anticipation, yet his voice was somehow level when he spoke. "Good evening." He said calmly. "Is there something we can help you with?"
Neither of them spoke, but the strangers took a step forwards. Tessa looked around, yet there were no other people out on the streets. It appeared London was deserted under the blurring moon.
"Pardon us," Jem said, his voice still calm, "but I'd appreciate it if you'd let my companions and I go by."
Only Jem, Tessa thought, would remain calm in this conversation.
Jem lightly pushed Tessa back about a step away, his hand slowly leaving her wrist. As if calculating the next minute of events, he slowly— very slowly— took a step forwards.
And he was totally expecting what happened next. The man swung his arm out, where his hand seemed to extend from his sleeve. But it wasn't a hand; it glinted in the moonlight. The man had a sword for a hand.
Jem swung his cane up as his blade appeared, blocking the man's attack. Then in a series of fast movements, the man was on his back, Jem's blade pressed at his heart.
"Why were you following us?" He asked.
Tessa stared at him. Why not who are you, or what are you? She asked mentally.
"Because that's not necessary to know yet." Cecily replied quietly.
"I said that out loud?" Tessa asked.
"Yep." Cecily answered.
Jem moved the blade an inch further. The man didn't flinch. Jem went to push the blade into the man's chest ever so slightly, when he ducked, just a milli-second before Cecily cried out a warning.
The woman had also swung her arm, yet Cecily had let go of Tessa's wrist and proceeded to battle the stranger, using only the short daggers in her hair.
"What did we miss?" Gideon panted, as he, his brother and Cyril skidded to a halt.
"Ain't that the missus from before?" Cyril asked his brother.
Thomas went to reply, before a horrible screech tore through the night.
Jem was pulling his blade from the man's chest, oil splattered on his face and presumably his black clothes.
Cecily saw the oil, and was quick to finish off the woman.
Tessa looked at the man and woman. They weren't even human.
"Start the car!" Cecily yelled suddenly.
They all followed her line of sight. At least two dozen other figures were advancing towards them.
"Tires are flat." Gideon responded.
"Split up." Jem told them. "Go in two's or three's. Make your own way back to the house."
He then grabbed Tessa's wrist, apologising as he did so, and the two ran down a small alley, skidding every now and then on the wet tarmac, Jem's cane clattering against his leg.
Tessa guessed they'd been running for a minute before Jem stopped, ascending a fire escape staircase on the side of a block of flats.
Tessa followed as they went up two flights, then stopped.
Jem sat down calmly, his legs swinging off the bottom of the railing. Tessa copied. "We'll wait for the others to go back first." Jem told her.
Tessa nodded, gasping for air. Jem wasn't out of breath like she was.
"Tessa…" Jem asked, wiping the back of his hand across his forehead in an attempt to clean the oil from his face. It only smudged. "Why didn't you tell me about the Infernal Devices?"
Tessa froze. "I—"
"They were in your dream you told Will and I about on the plane, weren't they?" Jem continued.
"I…" Tessa trailed off.
"Do you get dreams with them in every night?" Jem asked softly.
"No, no." Tessa said quickly. She paused.
"Tessa…" Jem sighed.
"Please, Jem." She knotted her hands together. "I don't want to talk about it."
Jem placed a hand on her knee momentarily. "Very well." He told her. "But pushing down your problems doesn't make them go away."
"But it makes you forget." Tessa argued as Jem removed his hand.
"No." Jem said quietly, so faintly Tessa couldn't hear it. "It makes it all you can think about."
*Did you all love my foreshadowing skills? I thought so.
Okay, so. Where do I begin?
Alright. Firstly: I'm aware this chapter sucks. It's painfully bad, and I'm paranoid that all my future chapters will be the same. However, I'm determined to make this fan fiction good. I can't not make it good, really.
Secondly: Choose for me. Short updates, fired out twice or more times a week, or long ones once a week. What would you rather?
Thirdly: Thank-you so much to all of you. You guys encouraged me to get back onto this story, and I'm excited to be writing it again. City of Infernal Gameswill be updated as soon as possible, and I may spring out an update for Eyes and Drabbles from the Shadow World.
Fourthly: If any of you need a laugh, a fic I most definitely would recommend is Red, Jack, the Wolf and the Bean Shop by SilverWolfFlight. It's parody, and an actual 'laugh out loud' style one-shot. It's short, sweet, and written in a can't-be-arsed attitude. But it's GREAT.
See you all soon—
SilverCarstairs
