In just the span of three days, everyone was talking about Amai's disappearance.
Students from the school were quick to create and plaster posters of her all over the vicinity. They all panicked and wondered where their kind and supportive Cooking President had gone, and the police also joined the search.
Some people assumed that Amai had run from home, while others feared that something may have happened to her. They tried to find a trail, but they simply couldn't find one.
More than anything, people were worried about Amai's father. He had finally gotten rid of his debt and he had a chance to make his daughter happy after all those painful years of their struggle. For her to suddenly disappear without a trace was certainly shattering.
It feels like I'm the only one glad about Amai's demise.
Sure, it hadn't been part of the plan, but it was satisfying nevertheless. Sticking so close to Senpai during the afterschool activities, she was simply asking to be killed. I was happy to oblige.
That day was a nightmare, however. There's no denying it, I was almost arrested for what I did. I had constructed an entire plan around my friendship with Amai. I would get us close to each other, then manipulate her to the point where she wouldn't even get near Senpai, and everything would be fine. There wouldn't be a trail to cover up or the police to avoid. Instead, however, I threw the whole thing out of a window because I simply couldn't control myself. My hatred for the Cooking Club President nullified my sense of reasoning. I slipped up.
If I hadn't received Info-chan's assistance that time, I would unquestionably be behind bars by now. She saved me.
But still after three days, I am still recovering.
Not physically, no. Physically, I am perfectly alright. It's more of a mental stress that's fallen upon me. Before I found my precious Senpai, I had never done these things, but now I was doing it frequently and tiringly often. There's no denying the fact that it is taking a toll on me. I'm exhausted.
So, I've been resting. I watch Senpai from afar and attend school normally. This is the life I know, the life I had before girls started getting to close him. This is the kind of daily schedule that I prefer. Things are so simple this way, and I can enjoy every wonderful thing about Senpai without any worries. This way of living is all I've ever asked for. I can watch my invaluable Senpai without any hinderance.
It turns out that with the changing weather, Senpai has been down with a slight cold. It's minor, so he can still come to school, but he's been sneezing more often. I've been observing it all very closely. It's so adorable and pleasant to hear. Its pitch, the way his face contorts before he sneezes, and everything else about it is just…perfect.
The other day I was able to get my hands on one of the tissues he used before sneezing. I had to wait until everyone in the classroom left, but it was undoubtedly worth it. I've stored it nice and well in my bedroom and I've been sure to not rub it anywhere. If it even scraps against something, some of his snot could fall off the tissue, rendering it useless.
Another piece of good news? No girls have been circling around Senpai since Amai's 'disappearance'. I was on edge at first, constantly checking to see if anyone even looked at Senpai for too long, but I found nothing. It seems as though no one will be bothering the two of us anymore. That's nice.
But I'll still keep my eyes open.
Since what happened, Akademi High is starting to pop up on the news more and more. A respectable high school that has recently been hit with tragedies over and over. People are beginning to talk, and I heard four students left the school because of superstition.
Still, Akademi High seems to be handling the situation well, despite all that is going on. They've been able to calm everyone down on several occasions, and even keep the stories vague when they appear on the media.
Am I surprised? No.
It's all the Student Council President's doing. With her wealth and influence in this city, forcing media outlets and the authorities to mostly keep quiet about what is going on must be as easy as snapping her fingers. This school has been the centre of controversy, investigation, and mysteries, but none has actually fazed it yet. Security hasn't even changed yet since Amai's disappearance. Take away the mourning of parents and students, and it's almost like nothing ever happened.
I have to hand it to the Council President and this school, they're determined to keep their property from being taken down.
One thing has changed, however.
Teachers noticed how students were becoming more paranoid and afraid, so they've set up short counselling sessions for every student. This helped parents remain calm and optimistic, since every session was confirmed to be completely free of charge.
Clever.
Some students saw this change as pointless, while others admitted that they desperately needed it. No matter the case, however, it became mandatory for everyone. Every student has a counselling session once a week, and can request for more if they feel the need. Even if you think you're fine, they still say that you are required to attend it and get evaluated.
I definitely see no use. There's nothing to gain from it. I'm not part of the fickle bunch that has been dramatized by the recent events. Sure, it's partially because I am the one behind it all, but something like this wouldn't bother me even if it wasn't my doing. Everyone fears for their lives and are always watching their backs, even if they pretend not to be.
I lurch forward on the bench and heave a heavy sigh.
It's almost the end of the school day, and I'm sitting in the small courtyard positioned within the interior of the building. It's rather relaxing and I can just sit here, able to recollect my thoughts.
Boys and girls are standing instead, chatting away at one another.
Only one other girl has bothered to sit down on these benches. She's on the other bench, most of her face covered by her hair.
I noticed her a few minutes ago. She's sat down and not said a word in a long time, choosing to simply stare at others instead, like me. It looks like I'm not the only one who is an observer.
Thanks to her, I don't look out of place.
I've seen her many times around school. With her hair obstructing the view, I've never actually seen what she looks like, but I can tell that she's more of an introvert.
Like me.
She's always alone and never around other people. She probably doesn't have any friends.
Truth be told, I haven't made any proper friends at Akademi High yet either, which makes blending in slightly more difficult. If I had a few 'friends', I could've gossiped and laughed with them to fit in better, but that isn't the case. The only friend I was able to get was Amai.
And she's, well, gone.
I check my phone. It's twelve already. That means I need to get moving.
I've got my own 'therapy' session to go to. There's no point in protesting either, the school isn't about to take no for an answer.
I get off the bench and head back into the school building. Fresh, cooling air hits my face the moment I open up the doors, all thanks to the air conditioning.
Brushing past a few students, I fall into the main hallway.
I'm dreading this, honestly. It's incredibly annoying to do such things, but it's only once a week, so I'm forced to just muster through it. All I really need to do is smile, say what the therapist wants to hear, and wait patiently until our time is up. It's like its own torture session, and you have to just wait it out.
I walk up the staircase with my bag on my shoulder. Currently, they've set up their room on the second floor.
Once I'm up, I wander over to the room and stand hesitantly in front of it.
I really don't want to do this, even if it's only for a couple of minutes. Even if it's not that difficult to go through, it's still undeniably frustrating. I don't need this. Some feeble weaklings in this school might need something like this every now and then, but I am most certainly not one of them. Why does the school even enforce such a stupid and wasteful thing onto us?
My hand slowly motions towards the door and I shake my head.
Life's tough, Ayano. Just go with it.
I knock on the door a few times and wait for a response. It takes a couple of moments, but eventually the door opens and I'm immediately greeted with a bright, cheerful smile.
"Ah, hello!" a middle-aged woman exclaims. "How are you today?"
"Great."
"That's good to hear." she says as she glances at the folder in her left hand. "Are you here for an appointment, Miss…?"
"Aishi."
"Miss Aishi." the woman repeats back happily. "That's a beautiful name."
"Thank you, ma'am."
"Oh dear, there's no need to be so formal." the woman laughs. "Please, call me Miss Greens."
"Okay, Miss Greens."
Greens opens up the door the whole way and I step inside.
There's a small desk in the middle of the room, with two chairs. There are plants scattered on every shelf, beside every window, and one on her armrest. The wallpapers of the room are also coloured completely in a sky blue tint. As I sit down on one of the chairs, I even notice an orange lava lamp on her table.
This place disgusts me.
Greens watches me sit down, then walks over to her filing cabinet and begins to search for my file. Once she finds it, she pulls it out and begins skimming through it with her smile growing larger.
"Oh!" she giggles, still reading through its contents. "It looks like this is your first appointment, isn't it?"
"That's right."
"Feeling nervous?"
"No."
Miss Greens motions towards the table, places down a small, red timer, and sits down on the chair opposite me.
"That's good." Greens smiles again. "Some of the students I get are very shy. You're not shy?"
"I don't think so."
"Okay, well, can you tell me a bit about yourself?"
This part is a little difficult.
I definitely don't feel like telling her anything, but she wants to know more about me.
I suppose I'll just go with family.
But even that is a challenge. My family isn't exactly ordinary anyway. Even if I had more time to think of a way to explain my family in a normal manner, I wouldn't succeed. Mother is the stranger one out of the two of them, considering the weird vibe she always gives off, and how…slippery she seems.
And Father? He could be a rotting corpse in our living room, and I wouldn't be able to tell the difference. He shows no emotion. He says around three words in an entire year. He doesn't even seem alive for the most part.
I'll just have to settle on idle chit-chat instead. Going into detail will only harm my reputation.
"I live in a small neighbourhood near the school, my mother chose the area because it's quiet." I finally answer.
"Ah," she nods as she keeps writing things down on her folder. "Do you like it there?"
"It's okay."
"Can you tell me more about your parents? What are they like?"
"My mother is…interesting, and my father is pretty quiet all the time."
"What do you mean by interesting?"
"Well," I hesitant, unsure of the meaning myself. "I guess I never know what's on her mind."
"I see." she murmurs. "Do you all get along well?"
"Yes."
"And how about school? Do you enjoy it?"
I look a little upset, showing her the reaction she wants to see. "Not recently, miss."
"Why's that?"
"The things that have been going on…it's scary."
"Oh, don't worry, dear. You're as safe as you can be in this school." Miss Greens says calmly, trying to reassure me. "And I'm sure our Cooking President will be found soon."
I highly doubt that.
Info-chan had already seen to that. Amai's dead body couldn't remain in my backyard, so she disposed it for me. I have no idea what Info-chan actually did with the corpse, but she's promised that it'll never be recovered.
"Yes," I say as I give a fake smile. "I truly hope so."
"Can you tell me your interests, Aishi? Is there anything you do in your free time? I'd like to know what inspires you."
"Err," I hesitate. "I draw."
"You draw? What of?"
I'm just making this up as I go along. "Flowers, trees, butterflies. Anything to do with nature, really."
"That's wonderful! Activities like drawing can really soothe the mind, and also bring out an artistic side of you."
"Yes…"
"How often do you draw?"
"Every now and then."
This is horrifically boring.
Here I am, getting evaluated mentally by some nobody. I could be outside, maybe snapping another precious photo of Senpai, yet I'm stuck right here, doing nothing. What is even the point of this? If it's supposed to make me feel better in any way, then it's failing. If it's supposed to calm me, it's failing. If it's supposed to make me see things in a different perspective, then it is failing spectacularly.
What even makes this woman so special? Who suddenly decided that she knew how the human mind works? If she is actually a professional, shouldn't she be able to see past my façade and notice how incredibly bored and indifferent I am of this entire session?
No.
Because she's not an expert. She doesn't know how minds work, not really. She only pretends to, and it only ever works on the other simple-minded fools that attend this school. I don't need help. I don't need an evaluation. I don't need any of this.
Yet, I have to silently go through it.
"Good, good…" Greens mutters, jotting more information down on her folder again. "I'm quite envious of you, I must admit."
"Thank you, Miss Greens."
"What about your social life? Do you have many friends at this school?"
I shuffle uncomfortably in my chair and slowly shake my head. There's no point of lying about this.
"No, Miss. I do not have any friends here."
"Oh? Are you a new student?"
"No, I've been here for a while."
"Oh dear." she frowns, looking genuinely upset. "That's terrible. Is there any reason why you don't have any?"
"I'm not sure. I guess I'm just not interested."
"In friends?"
"Yeah,"
Miss Greens nods slowly. "So…you don't want friends."
"I suppose so."
"What about special relationships? Do you have any interest in those?"
Oh.
Is she asking me if I have a crush on someone?
"Do you mean like love, Miss Greens?"
"Yes." Miss Greens chirps cheerfully. "I'd like to know if something like that is occupying your mind."
"Is it important?"
"Oh, yes. It could be the main reason why you have difficulty making friends. If you are already interested in a different kind of relationship, it might make it hard to focus on anything else. Tell me, Aishi, do you feel that way about someone? Is there a person that makes you feel special?"
Special?
To say that Senpai only makes me feel special would be a drastic understatement.
He makes me feel alive. My entire life, I felt so empty. I felt just like an empty husk. Nothing ever made me happy. Nothing ever made me sad. Nothing could even succeed to get a reaction out of me. My world was in black and white. I was a lifeless mess.
It's all because of Senpai that I'm alive now. The moment he came into my life, I was able to function like a normal person. Now I can feel angry, happy, sad, and all the other basic human emotions because of him. He brings out the humanity inside me, the thing I had been missing for so very long. My heart beats only for him, and I exist only to be by his side.
"Yes, there is." I answer. "But he doesn't only make me feel special. It's more than that."
Miss Greens doesn't lose her smile. "I see. Can you possibly elaborate on that?"
I could explain that I'm willing to do anything for Senpai. That I'm willing to kill every last creature that ever gets too comfortable around him until the end of my days.
And that all the girls that have died or gone missing so far has all been to ensure Senpai and I's relationship.
But, for obvious reasons, I cannot.
The timer on Miss Greens' table begins to erupt and the two of us glance over to it, our conversation ending abruptly.
It's over. Our session has finally come to an end. I can leave this place and get back to my classes. Even though Greens seems to be having the time of her life, I couldn't be any more thankful to hear that timer go off.
"Oh, my." Miss Greens laughs. "I hardly noticed the time. Our talk has come to its finish, I'm afraid."
"It's been a delight." I lie through gritted teeth.
"Likewise." she nods.
I get up from my chair, grab my schoolbag, and slowly head towards the door.
But just before I'm about to leave, Miss Greens stops me in my tracks. She looks eager and intrigued.
"By the way," she speaks with humility. "Aishi, who is this special person?"
With a large, genuine grin, I turn back at her and decide to be completely honest with her for once.
When she hears my words, she begins laughing at the 'joke' I had said, but didn't realize just how heavy they actually were.
"I'd tell you, but then I'd have to kill you."
