Sorry so long, my best friend died and things have been difficult. So here's my distraction, hope this sates your curiosity...but watch for that cliffhanger. it's a doozy!
Chapter 28: Lost Cause
Derek's stomach did a flip and that morning's breakfast threatened to return, he tried desperately to keep his mind sharp and rationalize what could be causing Meredith's pains that was severe enough to warrant a hospital trip. Mark and Amy were talking to him and trying to calm him down, but he barely heard a word.
"Derek, it's gonna be okay," Amy felt him trying to squeeze her hand harder as if trying to ground himself or wake up.
Meredith lay on the exam table a nervous wreck, Christina at her side holding her hand and Owen exploring trying to find the bleed to stop it.
"Meredith," Owen's voice came from beneath the drape," We need to take you into surgery."
"Wha-what?"
"You've developed a severe case of Abruptio Placentae, we need to deliver now," he packed gauze to try and minim ize the bleeding," Christina page the OB stat, tell her to meet us in OR one."
The pain in her stomach grew worse as Hunt raced down the hallway to the waiting OR, it was insignificant when she thought of Derek,' What is he thinking? How long have I been gone?' her mind raced,' Does he know? Is he okay?' her thoughts were interrupted as Hunt and the awaiting surgical team transferred her onto the table. She felt someone hooking up an IV to her arm, then the pressure of whatever drugs they were pumping into her.
"Meredith, we need to stop that bleed," Owen was talking to her," Meredith!" he turned her to look at him," Mer, we can induce labor and hope for the best or we can do a C-section. It's your call."
"Deliver?" her vision was fading fast,' I can't deliver yet, I'm too...' blackness threatened.
"Meredith!" Hunt shook her lightly," Shit!" he turned to Christina," Call Derek, we need a decision and a consent to operate."
His cell rang, Mark jumped at the sudden noise in the room. He picked it up and answered," Sloan," a pause as Derek clutched Amy's hand so tightly it was getting increasingly more difficult to feel her fingers," Derek, it's for you," Mark put the phone on speaker and held it near him.
"H-hello?" his voice shook and he was sure he sounded about three inches tall.
"Derek, it's Owen," Derek tried to reposition and winced," listen carefully. Meredith is okay, she's developed Abruptio Placentae, meaning that her placenta has separated from her uterus and it's causing her to bleed heavily. You with me?"
"Yeah," a million possibilities went through his head.
"Okay, we need a decision," Hunt was trying not to scare him," She's unconscious and we need to know if we should do a C-section or induce labor."
"W-what's the risks?" Derek was afraid of the next sentence that would come through the phone.
"C-section we risk more bleeding and possibly her life, induce labor and we lessen her bleeding but risk your baby."
"S-save Meredith..."
"You got it," Hunt crackled a bit from static," I'll keep you updated, Derek," the phone beeped as the call ended.
Derek felt like he'd been stabbed again, all at once he couldn't catch his breath and the world spun uncontrollably. He heard Mark call for him one last time before his world faded to black.
==FLASHBACK==
Derek shuffled through the rubble, blood stained his shoes and the hem of his scrubs as he tried to find her. He picked through the crowd towards the dock and saw a small blonde haired girl looking out to the water. His heart went out to her as he approached her," Hey," he knelt beside her and put an arm around her shoulders," Do you know where Meredith is?" he hoped since Meredith had a soft spot for children that the child had seen her earlier and might remember her," She has blondish hair...?" he fished. What he wasn't expecting was for that little girl to stare him straight in the face and point outwards to the water," You sure?" she nodded.
He shucked his jacket as fast as he could, without giving it a second thought he dove off the pier into the icy water. The sudden shock of cold paralyzed his muscles temporarily, he almost drew in a breath before he forced himself to keep going,'For Meredith,' he risked it. His eyes opened and searched for her, he panicked when he didn't see her,' Did she sink all the way down?' he dared a glance towards his feet,' Is she hurt?' he saw her. Arms upwards in ultimate surrender, Meredith was about five feet below him and sinking fast. He flipped his feet over his head and started towards her, he was terrified he wouldn't make it.
His hand touched hers and he pulled her into him, he looked up. The surface seemed so far away, his lungs screamed for air as the lactic acid in his muscles began to build. His vision was clouded as he neared the surface,' What if I pass out?' the thought terrified him and he tried to push it away.
When he finally broke the water, he crawled up the ramp and gasped for air," Meredith!" he yelled at her and slapped her to try and wake her up. He scooped her into his arms and ran towards the nearest medical station.
==END FLASHBACK==
Images of a cold, blue, lifeless Meredith ran through his mind. He was suddenly freezing, just like when the air hit his wet scrubs as he emerged from the water. His chest tightened as he fought his way back into reality," Merrr..." his words slurred,' They must have drugged me again,' his thoughts were sluggish.
"She's okay, Derek," Mark's voice was near, but his vision hadn't cleared enough to focus on his face," Addison finished the surgery," worry spread over Derek's face immediately.
"Merr..." he struggled to sit up, his body barely reacted.
"She's okay, Derek," Amelia squeezed his hand," Lay back down, you've got enough sedatives in you to tranq an elephant."
"Th'baby..." Derek did feel like a tranquilized elephant, his every move was clumsy and his body was almost numb.
"Addison..." Mark sat next to him, Derek's vision finally cleared," Addison was able to...but there's no guarantee."
"D-don't..." he felt numb, he sank back into the pillows. Hoping for some way to make it stop, praying that this wasn't reality, that it was all a bad dream and he'd wake up at any minute. His thoughts went to Meredith,' Does she know yet? Is she awake?' he imagined her waking up and hearing the news from Addison, or worse...one of the nurses," Hospital," Derek almost didn't recognize his own voice.
"What?" Amelia shifted her weight on the bed.
"'M goin t'hospital," he felt sick, ignored when his leg screamed at him to stop moving; and rolled to his side to sit up. He grew dizzy and the world seemed to distort around him, pain shot up his side when he dragged his legs to the edge of the bed and his ankles dangled off the sheets.
"Okay," Amelia put a hand on his shoulder," I'll get some clothes."
"Hurry," his voice came from between clenched teeth as he bit back the pain and willed himself to move.
==FLASHBACK==
Derek was barely aware of where he was, his eyes were heavy and his body throbbed. He heard Hunt and Webber talking and caught bits and pieces of the conversation.
"Came in and..." Webber sounded angry.
"Thought he was still hallucinating and..." Hunt was also trying to contain himself and not doing a great job of it.
"If it wasn't for Dr. Hunt..."
Derek finally realized the two were talking to a third person in the room and the conversation was about him. His eyes opened slowly, though his vision was still blurry he could make out a blue uniform that he was becoming all too familiarized with.
"Derek?" Hunt had noticed his eyes open and was over him in an instant.
"Ow-n..." he tried to form his friend's name and found his lips were nearly unresponsive.
"Yeah," Owen shined a penlight in his eyes and checked for pupil constriction," welcome back."
"Mmm..."
"Meredith's getting checked out," Hunt put his stethoscope in his ears and pushed the cloth away from Derek's chest," She's okay before you ask," he paused and glanced at his watch to keep time.
Derek felt the room jerk and twist," You're lucky you know," Webber was suddenly next to him," If Hunt hadn't noticed that you weren't having flashbacks we'd never have known Clark was here," he sat next on the edge of the bed next to him," if we'd sedated you any more we could have killed you."
The realization and previous day's fears struck, a cold chill ran down his spine as he thought about all that could have gone wrong. The walls began to drip towards the floor and the ceiling looked like it had snakes descending from it, he shuddered and shut his eyes trying to block out the hallucinations. He opened them slowly to see if they'd cleared, the metal railings on his bed now looked like knives.
"You okay?" Owen put a hand on his to try and ground what he guessed were about a million different ghosts from the way Derek's eyes darted around the room.
"Wallssss...Knniivesss..." his eyes rolled upwards, he welcomed the darkness.
==END FLASHBACK==
Derek felt like time had lapsed on him, he opened his eyes and saw the roof of Mark's car,' When did I get in Mark's car?' he wondered for a few seconds before,' When did Mark's car get to my house for that matter?' the car spun and suddenly he felt sick. Amy's face came into view, she ran her fingers through his hair like Meredith did when he was at the hospital and scared.
Amy stroked Derek's face and tried her best to keep him calm as Mark sped in and out of traffic. His chest rose and fell faster than it should have considering the cocktail Mark had mixed before they'd left. The only other time she'd seen anyone look as bad as her brother did was the night her life changed forever.
==FLASHBACK==
There was a nice ambience in the air as Amelia and Derek chased each other up and down the aisles, she giggled as he scooped her into his arms and tickled her. The bell on the door jangled as it opened, announcing another customer. Derek smiled and stopped tickling her," You know how dad is when he's at work," he whispered and made a mock salute. She covered her mouth and stifled a laugh as he marched towards the counter.
Amelia's giggles turned into a snort that her brother turned around to snicker at," Der-der," she pulled a bubble gum egg out of her pocket, it held two sticky bugs in it she'd won at school. It'd sat in her pocket all day waiting for when she'd see Derek at the store, she had images of the two of them tossing it on the cooler doors and seeing whose bug stuck the best and longest," Der?" she tried again for his attention, but his back was to her," Dere-!" Derek turned and grabbed her, he held her tightly and she thought he was going to tickled her again. She protested and started to laugh again as she feigned fighting his grip, his hand went to her mouth and covered it.
She began to get scared until he whispered into her ear," Amy, quiet," he sounded serious so she nodded her head, his hand moved from her mouth," Shhh," his breath was hot against her cheek as picked her up. Several moments of silence passed and she was beginning to get antsy and wonder what was going on. Derek kept still like he was watching something intently, her face was now buried into his t-shirt and Amy could see nothing.
A ear-shattering crack broke the silence and Amy screamed into Derek's chest, he tightened his grip on her and she felt him kneel into a running stance. Several tense seconds later the bell jangled on the door again and Derek finally loosed his grip," Amy, stay here," he put his hands on her shoulders," No matter what happens or what you hear," she started to shake and a tear ran down her cheek, but she nodded," I'll be right back."
Amy heard him scream, she couldn't resist. She ran towards the sound and saw Derek over their father, who was laying on the ground in a pool of spreading blood. Derek had both his hands on their dad's chest, trying desperately to stop the bleeding. The loud crack they'd heard, she now realized was a gunshot. He must have heard her footsteps," Amy don't!" he put a hand up behind him, smeared with blood all the way up to his elbow. He put his hand back on his dad's chest," Call nine one one Amy," his voice broke and she heard tears as he choked on his words.
"Derek?" she was numb as she rushed past her brother, and sick when she saw her father laying on the floor. Blood seeping out of his chest, he made a coughing sound that was definitely not normal. She dialed and held the phone to Derek's ear, anything to be close to Dad.
"Get here fast," Derek's eyes were wild as he put all his weight on his hands.
"S-son..." his father's voice was small and weak.
"Dad!" Derek's tears fell onto his hands and mixed with the blood.
"It's..." he struggled for air," s'okay."
"No, Dad stay with me!" Derek's voice shook," You're going to be okay."
"D-derek, take c-care of Ammm..."
"Dad no!" the bell on the door rang as the paramedics burst in, they pried Derek away from his father's body and did their best to revive him.
==END FLASHBACK==
The Derek that lay in her lap had the same shell-shocked look on his face as the big brother she remembered holding onto as she cried into his blood-stained t-shirt. That night she'd watched as he'd transformed from a boy to a man in a matter of minutes; from the big brother who tickled her and played tag, to the man that had watched over her and done his best to fill his father's shoes. As his eyes closed, she let herself cry.
Sooooo...emotional and a rollercoaster, next chapter coming fast :)
