Disclaimer: Altogether now, "Car is not Stephanie. Car does not own Twilight." Very good.

A/N: More amazingness for me to gush about! hehe The sad thing is I became very busy and was not able to respond to everyone like I want to! You should get a response from me if you review, so don't think I'm ignoring you or don't care, I love you all for your support so much!

With that said I have to tell you Chapter 28 was hard for me to write. It just wouldn't form correctly. That's why it's so late going up, I wasn't happy with it for a long time. I feel like I got some pretty memorable stuff in it though, and it feels like part of IEWIS so here I am giving it over to all of you. You know the drill, give me the "hit or miss" so I know. :) I don't want to call it a filler chapter, because I don't believe IEWIS has those. I think every sentence and every scene is important because the characters are so much a part of it. Hopefully you all agree.

Ok - I got a review yesterday saying IEWIS was nominated for an award. What the heck? You guys, that's crazy! haha I guess it's nominated for the "All Human AU Round" of the Twilight Awards in the category of "Best Love Triangle". I was surprised and flattered and it took me a while to get over it haha. I have no idea what kind of chance I stand in that category since the love in IEWIS isn't so much a triangle as it is an out of control spiral for the first 26 chapters, haha, but I'm so incredibly thrilled to even be thought of. Thank you, whoever made this happen and whoever else is here reading this now.

Ah, ok, I'll save the rest for after the chapter... off you go!


Chapter 28 - Home for the Holidays

Much to my discontent everyone booked their plane tickets home for the holidays and I planned my lonely 8 hour drive.

"Honey it's not going to be that bad. You love Christmas, remember?" My mother was trying to soothe me as December 22nd, the day the last of my Hollywood family flew away, drew nearer and nearer. She sounded more sad than I wanted her too.

"Mom of course I remember that I love Christmas." Honestly, what kind of a question is that? I fell in love, I didn't get amnesia.

"I just... things are different this year. I know it will be nice in Phoenix and I'll have fun,"lies,"but I'm just going to miss people-"

"Edward."

"Ok, Edward." She knows me almost as well as he does.

She paused then, not comforting me. Just letting me sit in my own misery that now included making her sad about Christmas as well.

"Don't be sad mom. I'm excited to be home for a while." More lies.

"Don't lie to me Isabella Marie! I know where you heart will be all week long." She sighed but then perked up, "Well, I don't even care if you mope, I can't wait to see you anyway! And your father is pretty excited too. You know, as excited as Charlie gets." Her laugh took over then and I smiled at it. It was almost a musical sound as well, just not as smooth or lyrical as Edward's.

I hung up soon after that and went over the next week's schedule in my head again to make sure I had it right.

Rosalie leaves first on the 19th, then Emmett and Edward on the 20th, then Alice on the 21st, then Jasper on the 22nd, then I head off myself on the 23rd.

It sounds kind of ridiculous, doesn't it? You'd think they'd all coordinate better since I was the only one able to drive everyone to the airport. No. Communicating about things like airport schedules wasn't this group's strong point. Grape Toss, dance parties, faux weddings, forts, Halo, and Friends can bring it! But practical scheduling - forget it.

Rose has to leave earliest because her family is spending Christmas in the Bahamas this year. Well off, remember? Alice is going the 21st, and Emmet and Edward were on the 20th, which was all reasonable. The thing that probably makes the least sense is the Cullen boys' split schedule. Emmett and Edward are leaving the 20th and Jasper the 22nd. I sighed as I remembered how much more clever Alice was than I am.

"I can't be expected to carry all my luggage all on my own all through the whole airport can I?" She pouted at me, reenacting her cute little scene. I even fell for it for a second.

"That's what did it? That's all you had to say to get Jasper to stay a few extra days?" My jaw dropped.That didn't seem fair. I knew the real reson was because he wanted to stay with her and I knew Edward would have stayed longer if I had asked him to, but honestly I hadn't really thought of it. I mean they were going home for Christmas, I assumed Carlisle and Esme set up arrival and departure dates that worked for the whole family.

So as it stands I will have one extra night here with just Jasper and I. He said he could get a shuttle or something if I didn't want to stay in LA and drive him to the airport, but that didn't make much sense to me. Of course I would help him out.

Each day brought us closer and closer to the dreaded 19th when we would be apart for a total of 2 whole weeks and 2 days. Rose was the first to leave on the 19th and I was the last to come home on January 5th. My mother's birthday was the 4th so I was somewhat obligated to stay through then. We were going to see "The Lion King" (you know, the Broadway version) on her birthday and I was going to drive straight back to Hollywood after that.
December 18th came and there was a show. The Holiday Show I guess it was being called.

Alice dressed me in bright red and clapped when it didn't clash horribly with my skin.

Edward made me blush by looking me in the eye for a moment during one of their songs on a line that mentioned something about being "red hot" and I smiled sheepishly.

When they finished their set and cleared their gear off stage we all went outside to help load the jeep. We found this helped things move quicker later on when it was time to leave.

Edward took my hand suddenly after I loaded a guitar case into the open trunk of the jeep and drug me around the other side of the huge vehicle so it blocked us from the view of people coming in and out of the venue.

He pushed me up against the door and looked right into me, his green eyes positively smoldering at me.

"Why would you do that to me?" He asked through the crooked smile.

"Do what?" I was smiling back idiotically because I didn't know what else to do.

Yes, I had been kissing him as often as possible for nearly a week now, but it's not like when we did that any of his God like perfection rubbed off on me. He still had it all. He stunned me in this moment just as much as he had the first day I saw him.

"Why would you distract me like that while I'm on stage?" He kissed me slowly and then pulled away.

"I'm sorry," I laughed nervously when I could breathe again, and I wasn't very sorry at all. Quite pleased with myself actually. "I was just standing where I always do." I said it innocently and he smirked.

"I'm not just talking about tonight, love."

Gosh I loved when he called me that. He is always doing that to me now. He's always saying things that make me wonder at how he sees me that way. So differently from how I see myself.

We kissed again and then he released me some, walking us back around the jeep to the others but keeping a hold of my hand.

"I'm sorry but I was thinking of that the whole show," he said to me quietly with a smirk.

"No complaints here!" I raised my hands in surrender and he laughed loudly, making me entirely happy.

Rose and Alice found me then and told me they were walking down to the 7-11 a few blocks away for some snacks and stuff. They boys had to stay and mingle and sell merch so we left them behind and began our trek to the store, just the 3 of us.

We took our sweet time and sauntered back to the venue slowly, Alice practically dancing the whole way as she showed us the sidewalk version of her final dance number for school. Our graduation at school was in January, about 2 weeks after the new year started. It's such a weird time for graduation, we all speculated on that. But the thing is - we went to acting school. Their motto might as well be: "Well it's not real school at all so we can do whatever the heck we want!" At least that's what it felt like.

We got back to the venue and waited for the show to end. No one felt like hanging out at home so when we got back to the apartments we decided to change, well I decided to change, and head to the beach. Heck if I was wearing my "show look" to the beach. I grabbed the maroon hoodie and my sandals, my hair curly hair the only survivor of the "red hot" outfit from the show.

We drove to Santa Monica and parked then walked onto the sand. It was incredibly dark and beautiful, still warm enough in a California December to be there with just jeans and sweatshirts on.

We were all huddled around eachother just watching the water and laughing at various things but then it got quiet.

I felt like we were all thinking about the separation coming up. Not only that it was going to be for the holidays, but that someday it might be permanent. Like this was just a preview of life ripping us apart for good someday. I didn't like the feeling at all.

"Let's make a deal guys." Alice broke the silence with her little voice."Let's promise that no matter what, 10 years from right now we will meet back here. No matter where we are or what we are doing in life we have to come back to this spot and hang out."

"Deal." I said too quickly.

"You don't expect us all to still be together in 10 years, Alice?" Edward said behind me. He had his arms wrapped around me and was leaning into my back.

"Well, I don't know. Not all 6 of us all the time like now. We have to do something with our lives, right? We can't survive by hanging out together in Hollywood for the rest of time, can we?" She was laughing a little at that thought and it quietly spread throughout the rest of the group.

"Maybe we could, if we found someone to sponsor us." Emmett laughed.

"Like, we'd wear their logo around and be walking advertisements and make appearances, and they'd paid for us to live together?" I asked seriously.

"Heck yes!" Emmett laughed again.

"That could work, or we could become a traveling circus act." Rose threw out sarcastically, mocking Emmett's silly sponsor idea.

"We could go deep into the south and hide out," Jasper said mysteriously.

"Like in the underground railroad or something?" Rose laughed as she said it skeptically, shooting down another silly idea.

"Oh yeah, can you imagine us showing up at people's houses in the middle of the night, asking for shelter in their basements?" Alice asked the group as more laughs broke out.

"No, no. I meant like witness protection. We could just take on new identities. Stay on the move and law low. " Jasper defended his idea and shrugged.

"We'd have to play music though Jazz, no way we can lay low doing that." Edward was serious with that point.

"Oh yeah, man, music would still be involved." Jasper nodded with a smile.

The mood was lifting now.

"We could make matching clothes out of curtains and run away from real life to hide in the mountains, like the Von Trap family in the Sound of Music." I laughed at my own joke and pictured Emmett in a pair of floral patterened shorts and knee socks like the kids in the movie.

"We would be on tour forever!" Emmett boomed with satisfaction, picking Rosalie up and spinning her around.

"Hey! We could finally form that band you guys made up in high school." He looked at Jasper and Edward now, but they looked confused. "Remeber?! When mom and dad were planning on moving us to Texas? What was that band called?" Emmett stopped spinning Rose and looked at his brothers with laughter in his eyes as they both remembered simotaneously.

"The River Bottom Back Door Band!" Edward and Jasper said it together and then all 3 boys started laughing.

"What is that?" I asked on the edge of laughter myself.

Edward explained, "When we were in high school our dad was thinking of transferring to a hospital in Texas so we were talking about moving for a while. This was in the throws of the Maria era for Jasper," Edward glanced to Jasper and Jasper dramaticaly shuttered at the name, "so naturally he threw a little fit and refused to go. Nothing was certain but he was still upset for days. He sat in his room and wouldn't talk to anyone." Edward chuckled at the memory even though it sounded sad.

"I was moody in high school." Jasper shrugged it off.

"Anyway, Eddie decides to try and cheer Jasper up one day so he comes up with this elaborate story about how living in Texas would be fun. We could wear overalls with no shirts and chew on straw and play music on washboards and stuff." Emmett was flailing his big arms as he explained.

"He got me into the joke and we ended up forming a whole Texas life for ourselves in our heads. We decided to form a new band, a 'Texas appropriate band', and only play music with things you could cook and or clean with." Jasper was smiling widely.

"I don't remember how we came up with the name of the band but we made aliases from it as well." Edward smiled wider. "I was Johnny Bob River Bottom and Jasper was Louie Draw Back." They were all practically giggling now, or whatever the boy equivalent giggling is.

"What was Emmett's Texas name?" I asked through small giggles of my own.

"Cletus!" Emmett said with pride and a heavy melodramatic Texas accent. "Cletus Door Bottom, brother of Jon Bob River Bottom of course." He stuck out his fist to Edward and they bumped them together in the air as we all laughed at the enthuiasm of their story.

"We spent hours in Jasper's room that night talking in Texas accents and writing songs for The River Bottom Back Door Band. It became the running joke that if our parents really did move us to Texas, or anywhere away from Forks for that matter, we would head down south and forsake real life and become our new hick identities." Edward smiled approvingly at the plan.

"Wow. So much information we did not need to know!" Rosalie laughed.

"Awe Rosie, you wouldn't come to Texas with me and be Mrs. Door Bottom? I wrote a song about her, you know. Well finding her someday." Emmett leaned in and kisser her cheek.

"You wrote a song?" I raised an eyeborw. Emmett doesn't sing in the band, ever. Apparently they really would change things up in Texas.

He nodded and Alice bounced a few times, "AH! We have to hear it! Sing it now!" She was giggling and looking at all the boys hopefully.

"I don't think I remember it..." Jasper said uncertainly while he thought.

"I might." Edward smiled.

"Oh I do!" Emmett laughed. He cleared his throat and started clapping a beat out as he took a step back from Rosalie:

"Well I came on down to Texas, to get me a new lyfe,
I didn't think, however, that I'd be missing me a wife..
."

He began the song in his thick, fake, ridiculous, Texas accent and started bouncing his shoulers up and down in rhythm with the clapping, making us all laugh harder and harder.

"I ain't got me a Chevy and I ain't got me no cow,
But down here in Texas I'll find all that some how
,"

Now Jasper and Edward had familiarity in their eyes and they both joined in the next line with their own hurrendous accents, appearing to have remembered everything and suprisingly enough they even had a bit of a harmony:

"You see all them flashy thangs can be paid fer with coins
But if you ask me what I'm wanting - what I'm cravin in my loins,
I've got one thang on my mind - one somethang fumblin' in my heart,
Deep down here in Texas I'm hankerin' for a brand new starrrrrrt...
"

The last note was held out and Emmett was singing a very high pitched comical note and then he let our a huge, "Yee haw boys! Bring it home!"

All of us girls were silently dying with laughter, not wanting to interrupt the performance. This was the most ridiculous thing they had ever done. The chorus got fancy with Jazz and Edward singing back up:

Em: "I need to round me up a wife!"
J & E: "Cletus needs a wife..."
EM: "I'm gunna lasso me a wife!"
J & E: "And she won't put up a fight.."
"So watch yer back boys, lock up yer ladies of you got 'em!
I ain't stopping my tour of Texas until I find the future Mrs. Cletus Door Bottom!"

Alice literally fell into the sand in laugher when they ended and I was hunched over trying to calm my breathing down. Rose was laughing into her hand and the boys were cracking up as well, but in a more proud and memorable fashion.

When Rose recovered she turned to Emmett, "Well, Cletus, I'm no southern bell so I'm not sure how happy the south would be with Rosie Door Bottom shakin things up."

I laughed at the image of Rose in overalls and suddenly got a picture of all of us in plaid shirts and cut off jeans, having a hoe down and raising chickens.

"Anything goes as long as we're together though, right guys? Even the River Bottom band." Jasper mused.

"Yeah, we'd talk Rose into it eventually," I said smiling at her.

"We could be your Back Door Groupies!" Alice laughed and continued to roll around on the sand until Jasper finally helped her up.

The laughter died out eventually and we settled back into the silence. The mood was definitely lighter though, like having the fake back up plan really did save us from having real lives someday.

"Man, we cannot do this beach thing in Forks." Jasper sighed looking towards the crashing waves.

"Not even in the summer!" Edward mused beside me.

"Is it really that bad?" Alice asked. She loved the sun so much, it was hard for her to imagine life without it.

"Yeah, it's practically the rainiest place in the world." Jasper laughed and put his arm around her. "You would like it though. Shopping ins't too far away so you would be inside all the time anyway." She giggled and in a rare moment he leaned down and sweetly kissed her in front of everyone.

Edward leaned down to me and I liked hearing the velvet again with out Johnny Bob's southern twang tainting it's smoothness, "You aren't going to react reflexively to that are you? With your bad habit and all?" He smirked and I stuck out my tongue quickly.

"No, I'm fine thank you." I said it smugly and narrowed my eyes play fully. I had given up fake gagging after that first day he caught me.

"Too bad." He sighed.

"Why is that too bad?"

More smirking, "because I was having a good time curing you of it." He shrugged and turned to walk away from me towards the water, denying me the kiss that was supposed to me my remedy.

"Oh no you don't Johnny Bottom!" I ran after him and grabbed his shoulders, turning him around to give me some much needed "curing".

He was faster though, as usual, and he spun around first to start tickling me.

When he relented I stood up straight and swatted his arm for attacking me. He just laughed and put it around me.

That's when I noticed Rose was alone.

"Where's Emmett?" I asked her.

"Oh you know, he had business to take care of." She rolled her eyes dramatically and pointed over her shoulder towards the ocean.

A few moments later Emmett came running up and the bottom of his pants were soaked.

"Guess what I just did?" He sounded proud.

When none of us responded...

"I did number one in the ocean! The big relief in the big blue!" He clapped his hands together and laughed proudly.

"Really? Number one Emmett?" I asked, not sure why I was so surprised that he did it or that he still called it that.

"Heck yeah! It was f'kin awesome!"

The 3 of us girls looked straight at him then. It was more odd than hearing the fake Texas accent and listening to him sing about rounding up Mrs. Door Bottom. None of us really ever swore. We were ladies, and I had been told that the boys "weren't raised that way". It made sense once you met Carlisle and Esme.

But what Emmett just said wasn't even the whole word. It was just the consonants. He skipped right over the "u" which made hearing it from him even more unusual.

"Alright!" Jasper said suddenly, raising his fist to Edward. It seemed as if another brother memory was happening.

They both looked delighted as Edward raised his fist up too and they bumped them together.

"Cussin' day!" They said happily and in unison, just like when they remembered the band name a few minutes ago.

"Excuse me, what?" Rosalie said looking to all 3 boys. You could see the disbelief in all of our eyes as we watched the boys act exactly like, well, boys.

"We started it when we were younger. This was way before the River Bottom Band. We knew there were certain words we shouldn't say, because mom told us not to, but Emmett would always try to get Edward and I to say them anyway to get us in trouble." Jasper started explaining to our blank faces.

"I was me so of course I never gave in and said them when I knew that our mother had already told us not to." Edward smiled a proud smile that still looked a little too boy-filled.

"So I made up Cussin' Day!" Emmett proudly proclaimed and then they all looked at us like everything was explained.

Nope. Living in Texas, raising chickens, lassoing wives, and playing washboards made more sense than this. This memory's humor was lost on us girls.

"And this...Cussin' Day... it's a happy thing?" Rosalie was representing us girls, trying so very hard to understand.

They all started laughing then.

"It was good for me! You should have seen proper little Edward and quiet little Jaspie over here telling my friends to eff off., not knowing what the heck it meant."

They were still laughing at memories and we were still confused as to why it was such a great thing.

"So you'd have days where you'd all just sit around and say bad words to each other?" I asked with a raised brow. "That seems productive and wholesome." I nodded my head theatrically and my heavy sarcasm was making Edward nervous, I could tell by the way his smile faltered a little.

"Well you see, Emmett made rules so that we still wouldn't say the words in front of our parents and then tell them he told us it was ok and in turn get him into trouble. So he told Jasper and I that whenever he said one, we would know that it was ok. It became a game of sorts. As we got older and we knew what was really going it sort of evolved and continued, and if Emmett slipped out of anger or somthing we would return to the game and start to keep score to see who could fit the most words in during the next 24 hours and still not get caught by anyone outside of the 3 of us."

Their smiles turned sweeter as if they just told us the story of Emmett helping them rescue a kitten out of a tree or something.

No. We were still talking about their brilliant Cussin' Day.

"Clever." Alice snorted with as much sarcasm as I had ever heard her have.

"So why not say the whole word then? You left out the u if I remember correctly." Rose was just egging them on now.

"It doesn't feel as dirty." Jasper shrugged and the mood got awkward when nobody said anything more.

They weren't laughing anymore because it clearly wasn't as entertaining as they thought it was to people outside of their little Cussin' Club. Maybe they should take on the rules of Fight Club. Namely the first one.

After that the ambiance of the beach was a little ruined so we headed home.

I ended up in Edward's room that night as he started to pack and I was just laying on his bed as he moved around his room.

"So... this Cussin' Day thing..." I started with a smile, knowing he wouldn't want to talk about it with just me.

"Bella, don't."

"I'm just wondering...did you ever win a day?" I was holding in laughter as I watched him shift uncomfortably. It was amusing, he was usually so confident and gracefull.

"I don't remember, can you hand me that shirt?" He sped by his answer and tried to distract me with his own question.

I handed him his shirt and continued to stare at him.

"Why don't you want to talk about it with me?"

"There's nothing to talk about, it's just a stupid thing I do, or did, with my brothers. It hasn't come up in ages so it's nothing." He wasn't looking at me, just down at his bag.

"Edward, seriously, you can't even look at me. I don't like that." I gave him a sad face, knowing it would work.

He looked up then and his shoulders slumped in defeat when he registered my sadness.

"What do you want me to say Bella? I dropped the "F Bomb" 36 times in 24 hours and it felt great? It was a stupid game we played in high school." He sounded kind of annoyed. This wasn't what I wanted.

"Is that annoyance I detect Edward Cullen? At moi?" I put my hand over my mouth in dramatic surprise and finally got his smile to break.

He climbed onto the bed, half on top of me, and let himself relax.

"It's just weird to talk about with you." He laid his head down by my neck and sighed.

I let my fingers find their favorite spot in his hair and I started running them through the bronze mess, knowing it would confort him. "But why? We've talked about so many other ridiculous things-"

"Because I don't want you to view me differently because of this Bella. I don't want you to think of me as some mindless guy that thinks saying some absurd word is amusing. That's so elemantary, it's so crude, its-"

I cut him off my pressing my lips to his.

"Why did I get that?" He looked confused but pleased as I pulled away.

"Cause you're cute when you think that your gentlemanly ways are being threatened." I smiled at him and was glad I finally understood his odd behavior. He still looked unconvinced.

"So what if you and your brothers have guy moments Edward? You're guys. I'm not going to view you differently. As long as you don't start calling me your 'boo' or something I'm fine with the words that you have been using up until this point." He chuckled and ducked back into my neck and kissed it once. "You will always be a gentleman to me. Besides, we've never told you this, but Rose, Alice, and I have Drinkin' Day."

I practically felt him roll his eyes but I didn't stop. "Oh yeah, and Gamblin' Day, and Sleep Around Day, and Smokin' Day..."

"Bella..." He kept his head down and laughed my name out but I didn't stop.

"No really! The second Rosalie takes a shot, pulls a slot, drops her pants, or lights up - it's on! The rest of the day is devoted to whatever black moral crime we can committ." He was laughing fully now, which was good.

"You don't view me any differently now because of all that do you?" I looked at him seriously. "I'm still your Bella after all."

"Yes you are." He smiled and kissed me. "I'll take you, black morals and all." Then he wrapped his arms around me and rolled us over so he had his back on the bed and I was laying on him.

I put my head down on his chest and he stroked my hair and it was just us laying there without and words for a few moments.

"I'm going to miss you." I confessed sadly.

"I know. You should really just come with me. We could send Emmett to Arizona instead. I'm sure it wouldn't be difficult to fool him into going." We both laughed and I sighed.

"I reaslly do wish I could go with you though. Finally see Forks."

"I should just kidnap you. My mother would love that!" He smiled at me widely.

"Mine wouldn't."

He sighed. "Next year then. You and your parents should come up to Washington for the holidays! My mother would approve, she loves to entertain. Plus, they all have to meet sooner or later, right?" He looked at me with a nod and I nodded back.

"Right." Now I sighed. "Next year then." That will have to do.

"And the year after that." He added.

"And the year after that." I smiled.

"And forever after that."

He started laughing sweetly then and kissed me quickly before getting up and packing some more.

Emmett decided to take Rose to the airport the next day, which made more sense than the original plan of me doing it. Like I said, we weren't the best at thinking of practical things.

I had to take Emmett and Edward the day after that, which was horrible.

It was raining that morning before we left which was an ironic send off for California to give to the guys before they headed back to the always wet Forks.

I parked the car and Emmett got out quickly to check in his bags, sensing the sappy goodbye that was to come. I looked after him for a second. At least the rain had stopped.

Edward wasn't ready yet. "Walk me in?" He asked eagerly.

"Yep!" I wasn't ready either.

The goodbye went by too quickly, of course. I promised myself I wasn't going to cry and I didn't. It was only going to be 15 days after all. I'd gone 33 without seeing him before, and a then jillion more after that when he was the black hole. It was like using the patch after quitting cold turkey. The only thing was I had no intention of quitting Edward after the patch expired.

"You're going to be ok then?" He teased me as I flung my arms around his neck one last time and explained my 33 days to 15 theory.

"A-ok. This is as easy as pie. No wait, I don't like pie. Easy as cake." I buried my face in his neck then, to get as much of the sweetness as I could, not backing up my "easy as cake" theory at all.

"Easy as coffee cake?" He teased again, no doubt trying to keep my light mood going.

I groaned. "Oh man, I'm going to have to live without the free coffee cake for 15 days too!"

We both laughed but never let go of eachother.

"15 days Isabella, nothing's going to change. Absence makes-"

"Don't say it Edward." I warned, cutting him off. This was proving to be harder for me than I thought it was going to be for some reason. "Don't talk about my heart growing fonder of you, if I squeeze any more love for you in there I swear it's going to burst. I'm on full Mr.!"

He squeezed me tighter then and breathed into my neck creating a wonderful sensation down my spine.

"So do you want to grow a backbone and be the stronger one, or should I?" I could hear the smile but it sounded sad as well. He had learned to joke through pain from me.

"You take this one." I said sadly, clinging to him even harder.

He chuckled at waited for a moment while the invisible backbone grew. Then he sighed.

"You have to let go of me, love, I don't think they will let me take you as a carry on."

"I will. I'm mentally preparing." What is wrong with me? This shouldn't be so hard.

He chuckled but made no move to leave either.

"Hey love birds, they're boarding first class. Eddie, swap the spit and lets go!" Emmett was as sensitive as always and quickly walked away from us and over to the boarding area where the line was starting to move.

"Bella..." His voice sounded tor sweet.

"No Edward. Don't say someting horribly romantic and make it worse for me. Backbone, remember?" I was in a death grip now. Or so I thought.

He reached up and unlocked my arms from his neck, bringing both of my hands into his.

"I don't want to leave you either Bella. It's just Christmas. 15 days." He looked into my eyes and I memorized the green again for the umpteenth time.

"You do know last time you went home you told me you were marrying another girl, don't you?" Huh. Is that what this is about? I didn't even hear that thought in my head before it came tumbling out.

"Is that what you're worried about?" He looked shocked now. His eyes got wider and then shut tightly as he pulled me into him again, the backbone shattering instantly.

"Bella, no! My God- Please don't think like that. Last time I went home...last time was all wrong. I wasn't complete last time. I was confused." He was talking quickly, frantically almost.

"I'm sorry Edward, I don't know where that came from. I guess I... don't know. I'm sorry. I'm fine, I promise." I couldn't think of what else to say. His panic had calmed me actually, and saying it out loud had seemed to drain the worry out of me too.

He pulled away to look at me again and put his hands on either side of my face. He sighed and smiled smally.

"We are hopeless aren't we?" He shook his head and we sarted laughing at ourselves. He kissed me once. "Bella, I am so entirely in love with you I constantly have to fight it from taking over everything I do every minute of everyday. These 15 days won't be any different."

I nodded and he nodded back then he kissed me one more time, longer, then walked away.

"Bye Bellarina! Love you sister!" Emmett boomed over the airport crowd as Edward got to his side.

"Goodbye Emmett!" I wave at them both and smiled confidentially.

15 days. Bring it.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

When Alice left we had another epiphany that Jasper should just use my car to take her to the airport. This gave me a few hours to just relax and hang out by myself. Which was the worst idea ever.

I laid helplessly on the Love Sac the entire time he was gone staring at Friends but not really watching. Being alone no longer suited me.

"How did it go?" I asked when he finally walked in the door. "Tearfull goodbye?" I smiled jokingly, I couldn't imagine Jasper crying.

"Hardly." He did sound sad though. "She was upset because she forgot to pack her "plane jacket" in her carry on so we spent a lot of the time going through her 4 different suitcases looking for it." He shook his head and I laughed. Of course Alice has a plane jacket.

Then he sighed and said, "I actually found it right away but ignored it and kept looking for a while so I could spend a few more minutes with her."

He smiled apologetically and I laughed a bit then said, "Oh Jasper, come wallow with me. The Love Sac is good for that." I patted the spot next to me and he walked over and flopped down. He sunk in next to me and we laid there for a while not talking. We were pathetic, but we were pathetic together.

Friends went on for another episode or 2 and besides the small laughter we both had we were silent.

"I miss Alice." He sighed finally after the DVD stopped because we had reached the last episode.

"I know what you mean." I goraned. Now we were laying in silence just staring at the blank TV.

It got a little awkward then. Jasper and I were close, like we all were. But he and I never really had that much time when it was just he and I. We'd spent a couple days here and there where we would lounge in a living room and watch Lord of the Rings or play Halo, but we now had a whole night. It was only 6pm and his flight didn't leave until 5pm the next day.

"This is ridiculous Jasper." I said after about 5 more minutes of wallowing. "We don't need them for fun! We are the funnest 2 in the group anyway." I looked over and smiled at him.

He laughed and looked back. "We are, aren't we?" I nodded and we laughed some more to cure the silence we had been sitting in for so long.

"Hungry?" He sat up suddenly.

"Sure!" I responded quickly.

We got up and he threw me my keys and we bolted out the door. Maybe a change of atmosphere would get rid of the wallowing.

We decided to get pizza at this little place down the street that had these amazing things we called Heart Attack Balls. They had a real name but I don't know it. It was a ball of the dough stuffed with cheese. They were greasy and fattening and delicious. It was the only real reason for coming to this pizza place over any other one. My obsession with the cheese balls was slightly embarassing so I tried to supress it when we started to form an order.

"Um, peperoni?" I asked for the 3rd time. We had gone through the pizza topping menu many times now, neither of us committing to anything.

He shook his head. "Bella, I have to be honest with you, I couldn't care less about the pizza. I really just want those Heart Attack things"

"Oh thank God, me too!" We laughed at ourselves and ordered far too many orders of the cheesy wonders for just 2 people.

The lady at the counter eyed us suspiciously when I paid and I found it odd because the order was funny to us, but not all together that unusual.

"What was that for?" I asked him quietly after she walked away.

He chuckled and stuck his hands in his pockets casually. "Well yesterday I came in here with Alice and she paid for our lunch. And the day before that I came in here with one of my co-workers, Charlotte, and she paid for that lunch. Now I'm in here with you, and you paid so this lady has served me for the past 3 days and she's seen me now with 3 different women. All who have paid for me."

"Oh. That's pretty funny Jasper." I could only imagine what this simple woman probably thought of Jasper and his many paying ladies.

We were both laughing silently now and I got another case of the giggleberries because of it, which passed right on to Jasper. I had to lean on his shoulder for support when the lady came back out and she continued to look at Jasper like some criminal, which made the laughter worse.

We finally got our Heart Attack Balls and we sped away with them, bursting through the door and letting our laughter loose all the way home.

We got back and fell to the floor and ate there quickly, saving whatever we couldn't finish for later.

We were both laying flat out on the floor as we finished our last ball for round 1, both of us too full of bread and cheese to really move.

"I feel gross." I moaned.

My phone started ringing and I smiled as I answered it.

"My Edward!"

"My Bella!" The phone version of the velvet greeted me and my heart became as full as my stomach.

"Oh man! I am so satisfied right now, it is incredible!" Jasper was still rubbing his stomach and reveling in the aftermath of the food. He was doing it rather loudly though.

"What exactly are you doing right now Bella?" Edward asked skeptically.

"Um, laying in the middle of the floor with your brother."

"Your very satisfied brother!" Jasper lifted his head towards the phone and yelled into it and I smacked his arm at his joke making him laugh.

"Uh-huh." Edward mused. "Enjoying yourselves, are you?" He was holding back a laugh, I could tell.

"You know, we're making the most of what we have." I answered casually and Jasper lifted his head to the phone and whispered, "yeah, eachother..." into it seductively. I was seeing a very unleashed side of Jasper I had never seen before, it was kind of fun.

"Did you get Jasper drunk?" Edward asked with an amused chuckle.

I laughed back. "Nope, not at all. But I'm beginning to think that cheese is to Jasper as pina colada is to Emmett. We had Heart Attack Balls for dinner."

Jasper was good after that and laid on the floor silently. I sat up to finish my conversation with Edward but it didn't last long.

"Call me later, before you go to bed," he suggested that so I could keep Jasper company.

"So what do you want to do now?" I asked Jazz when I hung up the phone.

He sat up too and shrugged. "I don't know. We can do what we usually do. Though I'm pretty sure you and I could act out the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy by now!" He chuckled and I laughed a little louder than necessary.

"Funny you should say that..." I trailed off still laughing.

"Why?" He asked me with a confused look.

I shouldn't have brought it up, the excessive amount of cheese must be clouding my better judgement.

"Never mind, it's nothing." But I was still laughing and he was looking at me suspiciosly.

"No way, why are you still laughing?"

I sighed. I could trust Jasper, right? We were kind of having a bonding night.

"Ok, but you have to promise me that you will not tell anyone. Not Alice, not your brothers, no one." I looked at him seriously and a smile overtook his face.

"Ok." He said hesitantly.

I gave him another serious look then got up and went into my room. I opened the bottom drawer of my night stand and then dug to the bottom of that until I found the small DVD case I knew would be there. I walked back to the living room and put the DVD in the player then turned to him.

"I'm only showing you this because I think you will appreciate it. It's going to be embarassing though." I smiled sheepishly and his deepend.

"Belle you didn't do a Lord of the Rings adult film did you?" He wiggled his eyebrows and I blushed instantly and smacked his arm.

"No Jasper! Ugh!"

He was cracking up and rubbing his arm like I actually hurt him. "I'm sorry, I couldn't help it. It's just the way you were setting it up...you make it sound so scandalous." I started laughing then and realized he was right. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt. Please, go on." He shut his mouth in a show of his good behavior but his bright blue eyes were still laughing at me. I continued anyway.

"Ok. In high school we had this project we had to do for one of my acting classes. It was a film acting project. You had to create a parody. My 2 partners and I decided to do a Lord of the Rings parody..."

His face lit up and he said, "Oh no, this isn't it is it Bella?" He pointed to the DVD and actually looked excited, which gave me confidence.

"Unfortunately it is." I laughed a little. "I play 5 of the 12 characters actually, since there were only 3 of us working on the project. Mainly we focus on Sam and Frodo and Gollum, but we had to do the opening scene with all 12 characters for comedic and story purposes."

He pursed his lips in anticipation now and I turned the TV screen on to the opening shot. I turned it off again right away.

"Remember this is high school, completely low budget, no formal acting training-"

"Bella just play it! It's going to be great no matter what, it's a good idea." The look he was giving me was excited and encouraging and I appreciated Jasper a lot in that moment.

I started it and hid my face initially. Then I started laughing along as it went on and on. I forgot how much I had enjoyed it. Jasper laughed at all the right places and completely appreciated every parody that flew across the screen like only a true fan could.

When it ended I knew my face was at least a little red and I turned to him sheepishly.

"That was great Bella, really. So funny. I didn't know you were that funny." He was finishing laughing and I was flattered.

"Thanks. It's still embarassing though. You cannot tell Edward, Jasper! He will beg me to let him watch it and there's no way I'm ever letting him see this! He does not need to see his girlfriend running around as a hobbit!" As I said it I was overtaken with laughter with him. I couldn't imagine Edward understanding. He had seen the movies all at least once but he was no fantasy buff like Jasper and I.

"I won't tell him if you really don't want me to, but he would love it no matter what because you are in it." He looked at me sincerely with a smile.

"Yeah that's true. He would probably say something like 'You, love, are the most alluring hobbit this side of Rivendale'." I mocked a deep voice for Edward and Jasper broke out laughing at my tease. "Which would be a load of crap because Hobbits are not alluring in the slightest."

"He would say something like that. But it's better than what Emmett would say. He'd say something ridiculous like, 'Those elf chicks are hot, the femmie boy elves don't deserve babes like that'". He puffed out his chest when he did his impression of Emmett and we laughed harder.

"Then Alice would probably complain about how their combat boots don't match their war paint on their faces."

"Oh yeah," Jasper agreed. '"I love her to death, but I can hear her know, 'Jazzy? Why do the big ones have to be so dirty? Didn't they have water back then?'"

He did a little voice for Alice and I fell over laughing. Who knew we would bond even further at our friends' expenses?

"Who are we to tease though?" I said still laying on the floor after I finally finished laughing. "We are the ones upset at them because they don't understand Lord of the Rings!'"

We laughed a little longer at ourselves then. I really did feel closer to Jasper, it was nice. Laughing always bonded me to people. There's just something about sharing that much joy with someone that brings you together.

"Oh man. This night has been so random." Jasper got up and took his regular spot in the bowl chair and I climbed into the Love Sac.

"Yeah, it really has. I never thought I would show anyone that DVD. I keep it because it's a good memory, but it's not my best acting or anything."

"Wait a minute, I got to see you act before Edward!" He smiled proudly.

"I guess you did. But you aren't allowed to tell him about it so it doesn't really count." I looked at him sternly, reminding him of his promise.

"Oh yeah." He looked let down. "Either way I still got the first look. He would hate that, I bet. He's really in love with you, you know?" He smiled at me but I was kind of surprised at how he just threw it out there.

"Um, yeah, he's told me."

"Ha. Good. You know it's not weird for you to be so sad to be away from him, Bella. Even for this short time. You guys just got into really being toghether, you probably don't feel like it's been long enough at all." He was being serious now, comforting. I appreciated it.

"Thanks Jazz. It does kind of feel that way. It's like, right when I make progress with him in our relationship something pulls us apart in one way or another. I know this time nothing will change, but I guess it's odd because I'm not a part of his life in Forks." I shrugged it off as he listened.

"That makes sense. It's weird for me to think of Alice back home with her family and friends that I don't know."

"Yeah, but last time Edward was home he decided to marry Tanya so him being in Forks leaves me with bad memories." There it was again. I wasn't upset or worried, just working through why him going home without me caused such a bad reaction in me.

"Oh, right. I forgot about that. That was the stupidest thing my brother has ever done. You know that wasn't anything serious, Bella. They spoke about it for about 10 minutes, if that. He told me about it afterward. They were at the river or something and she was asking him about his plans for when the band failed-"

"Ugh." I scoffed. That was rather unsupportive.

"I know..." Jasper rolled his eyes, "I guess he said if the band didn't make it he knew he would end up back in Forks. She took that as an opportunity to go on and on about how she saw her life going for the next 10 years or so, and how if he planned to be a part of it he needed to know marriage was included. He of course agreed, being the good boyfriend he was to her, and that's where he got that silly 'I'm marrying Tanya' stuff from. It was literally nothing. Just her telling him what his life would be like with her after he failed horribly at his dreams." Jasper looked angry now and I understood why Emmett had once said he rather have me as a sister instead of her.

"That is so wrong." I almost whispered."That's probably why he sounded so dead when he told me about it."

"Exactly." Jasper siad confidentially. "His plans to marry her didn't correspond with what he really wants to do with his life. He couldn't have both and he assumed he had to choose. Clearly he chose poorly. He had that ridiculous 'I have to save this relationship' complex with her. She's not exactly a bad person, Bella, but Tanya knows how to manipulate people, especially people she knows inside and out."

Wow. This new information was making me sick and comforting me at the same time. When Edward talked about marrying me the other night it was through his own free will. Sure I had asked him about his feelings about the faux wedding to lead into the conversation, but he's the one that declared it would be me he would sing his vows to.

My heart swelled as I realized how different the 2 situations were, and how very much alive he was when he had been softly telling me about how he envisioned his wedding. It was the exact, extreme opposite of how he sounded when he spoke of marrying Tanya.

"Tahnk you Jasper, you don't know how good it is to know that. Not that Edward went through that... just the truth I guess." I smiled and he returned it.

"Anytime sister."

I raised my eyebrow at his use of Emmett's term for me.

"What?!" He looked amused and raised his arms. "I think of you like a sister too, it's not just Emmett. Just because I don't shout it at you all the time doens't mean I don't feel that way." He chuckled and I laughed. Oh, Emmett.

"Thanks Jasper." It's all I could say without getting sappy and ridiculous.

'"Oh, I should probably tell you..." he looked hesitant now.

"What?"

"Well, every year our parents throw a New Years Eve party. It's nothing big, just a casual gathering of the people from town. But every year Tanya and her family come..." He made an "uh-oh" face and assumed I would catch on.

"So she's going to be there this year." I said it very blankly. I didn't really have any emotions about it. I mean, I know Edward loves me. He knew they would see eachother again and said it would be "civil". But why didn't he tell me about it? He probably didn't want me to worry. I bet my little comment in the airport didn't help. That's probably why he freaked out so bad...

"Edward is going to ask our parents to not invite them this year, but we're fairly sure they won't do that. They have been friends with Tanya's family for years and my father is very, um, neutral when it comes to the dating matters of his sons. Being the town doctor and all, he gas to be pretty understanding with everyone." He laughed slightly and shook his head. "Anyway, you have no reason to worry but Edward's trying to dodge the whole situation to make sure he knows you don't. I think you deserve to know though. In case you do want to talk to him about it."

I sighed. "No, I think I'll let him deal with it. I trust him to tell me when he's ready. Thanks though, brother."

We smiled at each other but didn't hug or anything like that. We just heated up the rest of the Heart Attack Balls and spent the rest of the night talking about the finer details of Middle Earth.

I called Edward before I went to bed like I said I would and then missed him way too much after I hung up.

Tomorrow I drive the lonely road to Phoenix. Farther away from Edward. Suddenly my favorite holiday song, "Home for the Holidays" seemed way too ironic.

Oh Christmas. Again I ask, how did we let things between us go so terribly wrong?

Hit or miss, it's up to you now...

Hey! EPOV Saturday tomorrow! Be ready :)

Oh, and the reviews lately have seriously been incredible. Chapter 26 got a total of 105! The specific things you guys point out as your fav lines, moments, etc are making me feel like I know you all better. I like sharing that stuff with you, keep up the good work IEWIS citizens!

Oh, and someone mentioned wanting a maroon zip up now. I do too! I think I'm going to make one for myself that says IEWIS on it and something like "Forever" on the front because this has been such a freaking great experience for me.

Then, when people were pointing out their favorite quotes, all I could think about was getting buttons made. You know the trendy ones all bands have now that are amazingly fun to collect? I could just see them all with IEWIS sayings on them like: "Sherbert me!" or "YOUR MOM'S THE LIST" or "Pina Colada Ville" or "The River Bottom Back Door Band" or "Mrs. Door Bottom" or "Back Door Groupie" or "IEWIS Citizen" or "I'm mentally preparing" or "What went wrong Chirstmas?" or "TAG" or "Team Bertha" and "Team Ruth" or "Beware of giggleberries" or "All the pretty ladies drink for free" or "Throw me the shimmy" or "I heart EPOV Saturdays" or really anything else clever anyone can think of that I'm totally missing right now from over thinking this stupid idea, haha.

It's just a dream, I know, but I got caught up in thinking about how happy it would make me. I probably should have been writing but I was laughing inside instead. Sigh.

LOVE YOUS AND YOUR AMAZING REVIEWS! -Car