Zared prowled the bridge of the Gehenna in a foul mood. Radha and the historians still hadn't translated the whole parchment, only giving him coordinates to a remote spot in the galaxy. An asteroid field of all places, with hundreds of thousands of the little buggers. It could take weeks. Weeks, he didn't have and then there was no guarantee that the next key would lead him to the third. Regardless of Jaden having Mandalore, he was still going to have to find the key. He was sorely tempted to break his promise to Jaden, knowing Admiral Onasi would do anything to get his son back, even involve the Jedi Council, but he couldn't do that. Who would have thought that the leader of the Sith Empire was a man of his word?
On top of that, Jaden herself was adding to his foul mood. He kept repeating it didn't matter, but damn it, it did! Somehow, she had gotten under his skin. She was sharing Carth Onasi's bed and that knowledge felt like a saber through his heart. Zared had been unable to sleep last night because of the feelings he sensed through the Force. He knew the moment Onasi had touched her and it twisted him into a knot. Frack! What was it about Carth Onasi that turned normal, intelligent, strong women into a quivering mass of need? Even Revan, despite her dislike of the man, had willingly gone into his arms. Granted, Zared had benefited from a few lessons, but really, he thought, the man was in his late forties, shouldn't he be slowing down or something?
Now, his left shoulder was throbbing and he knew it wasn't a good thing. It had started not too long ago and had just spiked, causing him to flinch. Jaden was up to something, he just couldn't figure out what it was. Somehow, she was tapping into a source of Force power and he could feel it swirl around him, teasing, tugging, and pushing back. Mixed with that was a sense of found peace and acceptance. That made him shudder, but perhaps worse, it scared him.
"What are you up to?" he whispered stopping in front of one of the observation windows. As he watched the blue weave of hyperspace, he felt the strong pull of the Force causing him to step forward to keep his balance. What's this, he thought as his mind flashed on the vision of Carth Onasi, his hand poised over Jaden's symbol, hesitating once before slamming his palm down on the glowing stone pillar.
Zared reared back a few paces before roaring his outrage and lunging at the vision before a white flame cradled itself around the admiral then threw him off his feet. Alarms screamed around him while the Gehenna bucked and twisted as the hyperspace route spit it out as if the ship was something vile. Zared found himself thrown to the deck, the wind knocked out of him. Several moments passed before he was able to breathe and get to his feet.
The bridge was in disarray, the ship listing at an odd angle. Some of his men were injured and others were putting out the small fires around various stations. He ordered Captain Balla to turn off the alarms.
"Milord?" The captain asked clearly shaken.
"You have fifteen minutes to give me a report on the condition of this ship and get me the location of the Sojourn," Zared snapped and stormed from the bridge to his private office.
"By all that is sacred, what have you done?"
Jaden took slow, calming breaths before she rose and signaled for the medics. "Come on handsome," she said as she tipped the chair back and straightened out his legs. He moaned at the movement. "Talk to me, Onasi." She sat next to him and brushed the hair from his face then ran her hands over his shoulders, arms, and chest to make sure there weren't any other injuries. She leaned forward and kissed his cheek before calling his name again. "Onasi, come on. Talk to me." When he still didn't respond, Jaden felt a shaft of fear go through her. Had she gone too far? She knew she lost control of the Joining when the Midiclorians had stepped in to protect Carth. She hadn't anticipated the dark side's violent reaction, thinking it hadn't gained such a stronghold, and that mistake had almost cost him his life.
"Coulda . . . told . . .me," he whispered. Jaden silently sighed, taking his hand and gave it a squeeze.
"The medics will be here soon."
"Tell me . . . what . . . to look . . . for," he said with an accusing look under his lowered lashes. Jaden brushed at his sable hair and smiled.
"You figured it out faster than I ever did."
"Cuz I'm an admiral," he painfully swallowed, " . . . just a girl." Jaden cocked a brow and chuckled. "Oooowww," he said as he gingerly moved his arm to her leg. "Thank you," he whispered, his eyes filled with gratitude.
"You're welcome."
"Luffu," he mumbled as his eyes closed and his breathing evened out.
Jaden kissed him gently and thought, you say that now, but when what you experienced sinks in, you may feel differently.
"Jaden, the medics are here," Dustil's voice crackled over the comm unit. And, she thought, everyone else based on the raised voices outside the door.
She was faced with chaos when the door opened. Dustil and HK stood in front of her, sentinels keeping out the riff-raff. HK had his rifle ready to fire, was in full assassination mode and aiming at Bastila and Tuluk, who were flanked by Atton and Canderous with Visas right behind. Beyond them were the medics trying to get through. To top off the party, General Lavek was bearing down on the group with a security detail close behind.
"Ensign Onasi! What the hell is going on here?" Kwyn bellowed down the narrow hallway.
"Ensign?" Jaden asked Dustil as she touched his shoulder.
"I did graduate," he said not taking his eyes off the group before him.
"So I heard. I was a bit busy that day."
"Thank the Force," he mumbled.
"You're welcome," Jaden said with a wink. Dustil gave her a curious look. "He's out of it, but you can see him." Dustil nodded and turned to the room.
"HK?"
"Eager Statement: Yes, Master. I am ready to defend my two favorite meat bags."
"I don't think that'll be necessary," she said rolling her eyes. "You can stand down."
"Query: Are you certain, Master? The one called Tuluk looks rather shifty to me."
She heard the snickers from the hallway and knew several of them agreed but didn't say so. Tuluk's face was mottled with rage, which made his beak-like nose stand out, and his close-set eyes appear smaller. "Stand down."
"Weary Resignation: Very well, Master, if you wish to thwart me of my duty, who am I to argue?"
Next?
Jaden crooked her finger at the med-techs. They looked at the group warily but came forward. "Take care with his midsection."
"Yes, ma'am," one of them acknowledged and they went into the room.
Next?
"So," she looked at Atton and Canderous, "how was the meeting?" she asked cheerfully.
"How dare you defy the wishes of the Jedi Council!" Bastila practically screamed. Jaden looked at Canderous who only shrugged.
"We can have you arrested for attempted murder," Tuluk added. Jaden snapped her gaze to the two Jedi Masters.
"The Council's wishes or yours, Bastila? I don't answer to the Council and I certainly don't answer to you," Jaden told her dangerously as she pointed to the irritating woman. She then turned to Tuluk, "You want to try to arrest me, you better remember I have a lot of energy I haven't absorbed yet that's just itching to be used."
"Are you threatening me?" He asked outraged that she would speak to him in that manner.
"Just a warning of the state I'm in at the moment."
"How could you do this again, knowing it could kill him?" Bastila demanded, shaking with her fury.
Jaden touched her temple and shook her head. "He's fine." Her head was pounding and she hadn't lied to Tuluk. She could feel the energy she had taken from Carth swirling around her and she needed to find a way to absorb it. Standing here arguing with two Jedi Masters wasn't the answer.
Bastila sucked in a breath as they brought Carth out of the room strapped to the gurney. She quickly went over to him and took his hand. Carth moaned at the contact, and when she touched his brow, he turned his head away. "Carth?"
The techs looked at Jaden and she nodded that they should move on. Dustil stopped beside her. She hadn't missed the sharp look of pain on Bastila's face when Carth turned away from her or the nasty look in her direction.
Jaden looked at Kwyn, "You want a piece of me too?"
"Yeah. You could have warned me this would take out half the systems on the ship," he said as he crossed his arms over his chest and narrowed his eyes.
Jaden tried to look contrite, but the grin peeked out anyway. "Sorry. T3 can help with the repairs."
"Damn straight," he said with his own lip quirking. "Are you okay?" He asked quietly.
"I will be," she said with a smile. "Thanks for asking."
Kwyn dismissed the security detail and started down the hall. He stopped at the end and turned back to her, "Are we going to have visitors I should be aware of?"
"No," she said shaking her head. Kwyn nodded and disappeared around the corner.
"Visitors?" Dustil asked.
"The Sith, you idiot!" Tuluk snarled.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Jaden said grabbing Atton around his waist as he charged at Tuluk.
"This isn't over," Bastila said haughtily and walked away with Tuluk.
~~ Why does she refuse to listen? ~~ She asked as her exhaustion threatened to undo her.
~~ Listening and hearing are two different things, child. You listened many times, yet you did not hear. ~~
~~ You're speaking Jedi again. ~~
~~ When you hear the voice, what is it saying? ~~
~~ That it feels shame for it's failure, that it feels lost, that it is alone. ~~
~~ And when you listen? ~~
Jaden thought for a moment, ~~ Empty echoes off a steel facade built around accepting that trust is not to be given lightly, that it only leads to betrayal. ~~
~~ She listens to the message, child but she does not hear what it is saying. ~~
Something was going to have to be done about Jaden. The Council had taken a wait and see attitude, as it always did, but it was becoming clear that she was a threat to the Jedi and the Republic. She had fooled some on the Council into thinking she was this light side point in the Force, but there were others who were convinced she was Sith and working with the Exile. Jaden was endangering the Republic and slowly murdering Admiral Onasi. The time to act was now, while emotions ran high and were easily manipulated.
T3 beeped, buzzed, and did what the technician told the droid to do. Reroute this, diagnose that and all the while T3 happily searched through the Republic database for information to store in the massive databank on the Ebon Hawk, built behind the bulkhead in the cabin Jaden used. An occasional whistle of dread slipped through and fortunately, the technician thought it was something to do with the system.
There were times T3 had occasion to question why the Master wanted such information but it wasn't the droids place to speculate. T3 carried out its orders and happily. Of all the masters, he liked Jaden best. She took the best care of T3 and HK, although the Master Revan had looked out for them. The little droid's motivators had revved up when Admiral Onasi had returned and T3 secretly hoped that the Admiral would be the next master. HK had put down that idea saying it was doubtful the Admiral would want any reminders of Revan or Jaden around when this was over. He had "pbbbbt" at the assassin droid and wheeled away.
Now, T3 was following the technician to their next assignment when a burst of static activated the private comm-link in the internal systems.
"How's my favorite Astromech droid?"
"Dwoo."
"One day I'm going to win you over, T3." The droid quietly beeped his denial. "Where is Jaden?" T3 ignored the question and rolled on. Zared sighed, "If I can reach this private channel, do you really think I can't reach other parts to you?" and to prove it, T3 felt a mild electrical shock over the com-link and freaked. There was no other way to describe it. His head shook back and forth while the stout body turned in circles, emitting excited beeps, twerts and chirps of doom. The droid felt another mild charge and if jumping was part of the programming, then T3 jumped.
"Stop it! You're giving me a headache. Now, where is Jaden?"
"What's wrong with your T3 unit?"
"I don't know. It just . . . freaked out."
"Well, you better catch it or General Lavek's going to have your head," the tech chuckled.
"Hey! Come back here you mechanical Gizka!"
T3 raced along the corridors of the Sojourn in search of Jaden, ignoring the angry shouts of the crew as they quickly jumped out of the way or risked being mowed down by the fast moving droid. As it was, a few were rewarded with bruised or broken toes for their lack of speed.
When T3 entered the medical center, he literally rolled into Kwyn, who found himself knocked to his knees. "Slow down. Where's the fire?" he asked picking himself up and rubbing a sore spot, but T3 had already rolled on, chirping of doom.
When T3 entered the private room Jaden and Carth had used, she was asleep on the bed. He rolled to her, chattering excitedly, as he bumped the bed several times. Jaden opened one eye and told the little droid to go away.
"Dwoo!"
"Then tell him you can't find me," she muttered pulling the pillow over her head. T3 didn't go away and the next string of beeps and whistles had Jaden getting up and sighing, "Fine, put him through."
As T3 hooked into the rooms comm unit, Kwyn walked, or rather limped, in the room. He locked the door and stood with his arms crossed and his feet apart. It was obvious he wasn't going to leave so Jaden ignored him and nodded to T3. "Stop torturing my droid."
"Your droid? I think T3 belonged to me first."
"Actually, T3 belonged to a Rodian named Bezit, or Whozit, or Whatzit long before you. It doesn't matter. Stop hurting T3."
Kwyn's arms fell to his side when the hologram of the Exile had appeared. Now, his mouth was in danger of dropping open as well.
There was nothing Jaden could do about it now so she asked, "What do you want, Zared?" She was resigned to the fact that she was going to have some fancy explaining to do when this conversation was over. She braced herself and pushed back the headache she could feel gaining ground in her skull.
"What do I want? Well, for starters you can tell me what the hell you're doing . . ."
"I was sleeping."
" . . . Then you can tell me why my ship was thrown out of the hyper-space route and oh hell, I can be nice, how's Admiral Onasi?" he asked planting his hands on his hips.
Jaden kept her features schooled in a mask of indifference. "I don't know why and he's fine, kind of you to ask."
Zared smiled his slick and oily best, "If I've told you once Darling, I've told you several times," the smile dropped and Kwyn felt a chill along his spine, "Stupid isn't a good look for you," he sneered.
Jaden sighed and shook her head. "Do you want a fair fight?"
"Stupid questions now?" Zared snapped.
"I'm leveling the odds."
"By knocking me on my ass?" He yelled. "This is the second time you've sent a wave of Force energy through the galaxy. I want to know why."
Jaden just stared at the holovid. How the hell did Zared know about Carth? He wouldn't just ask to make conversation. He must have seen him when the transfer took place and the Masters protected him as the dark side lunged forward. Stupid, stupid, stupid mistake on her part, but she wanted to give Morgana one last time with Carth. Why didn't you tell me the dark side was that entrenched? I would have found another way!
"Fine," he spit out.
"What do you want me to say?" She asked as her own anger began to rise. Fortunately, she was strong enough to allow that to happen.
"Well, maybe you can tell me why Carth Onasi shows up in my vision, just before I'm knocked on my ass!" Zared ran his hands through his hair in frustration.
"How the hell should I know? You know he's Telosian, descendent of the original settlers." In a well-duh tone, she went on to say, "Do you honestly think he's such a great pilot and commander because he practiced? Why do you think the Sith took his son?"
Zared frowned mulling the information over and was about to say something when his grin got in the way. "You wicked, wicked woman. Carth Onasi is Force Sensitive and you trained him. Isn't that breaking some cardinal rule?" Zared asked with a chuckle. Jaden gave him an innocent look, and then he burst out laughing. When Kwyn stepped forward, ready to defend his friend, Jaden shot him a look that had his feet stalling.
"I should demand to know how you convinced him to learn to use the very thing that has screwed with his life, but I need the laughs thinking about it will provide."
"Hmm, trade secret, but it is nice to see you smile again."
"Darling, only you could get the leader of the Sith Empire to . . ."
"Giggle like a girl?" Jaden mocked him angrily.
"You tell anyone . . ." he warned.
Jaden shook her head as she rolled her eyes, "Not a word."
After watching each other warily for a few moments Zared said, "Well, I have a key to find."
"Good luck," you're going to need it.
"Thanks for the lies, Jaden."
"My pleasure."
"Oh, and you really should have T3 checked, I think there's a short," he said with mock concern. "See you soon, Darling."
Jaden again rolled her eyes, "Looking forward to it." She collapsed to her knees the moment the holovid ended.
Kwyn was immediately at her side, helping her up and to the chair. "Are you all right?" He asked and Jaden nodded.
"T3, did you get a location?" The droid beeped, "How close is he?" Again, T3 answered. "Two days? Damn it."
"He's coming here. You said . . ." Kwyn asked with concern. T3 beeped and Jaden frowned. "Jaden!"
"Huh? No, he was two days from . . . the location of the second key. But the Force wave damaged some of his systems as well, so we have more time."
"Time for what?"
"To go to Korriban and seal the cave," she said as she reached up and scratched the side of her neck. She could still feel the prickle of the dark side and it was becoming imperative that they seal the cave. Hopefully, the pushback of the dark side at the Valley would buy them some time, but she wasn't counting on it.
"Then what?" Kwyn asked watching her.
"Don't know. I'm making this up as I go along."
Kwyn sighed and went to the wall to lean on it. He was worn out. Between commanding the ship and running interference with the Jedi Council, he hadn't had much chance to rest. The stims helped but he didn't like using them so Visas taught him some meditation techniques, but what he really wanted to do was lock the door to his room and get horizontal. It just wasn't going to happen with his best friend zoning in a Kolto tank, a certain Jedi dogging his heals, and a woman chatting amiably with the enemy as if they were old buddies catching up. If Kwyn hadn't known the history behind all this and trusted Carth, he too might think Jaden was a Sith.
"Does Carth know you two can find each other?" He asked.
Jaden inwardly sighed. "Yes."
"So Zared contacted you the last time," he stated.
"No. I hadn't spoken to him since we made the trade for the first key."
"Then why now?"
Jaden shrugged, "Know thy enemy and their capabilities." And, because I made a stupid mistake.
"But you didn't tell him anything. Even he said it was all lies," Kwyn said trying valiantly to hold on to his patience.
She wrinkled her nose, "Not exactly." When Kwyn rubbed at his temple, Jaden flexed her fingers and took away his headache. He gave a tired smile of thanks. "I didn't lie about Carth. He is Force Sensitive," she paused, "Very Force Sensitive. None of this would have been possible otherwise."
"Why didn't he ever say anything? Why didn't the Jedi come for him when he was a kid?"
"Because he doesn't know, Kwyn." Jaden sighed recognizing she had put her foot in this one by telling Zared of Carth's connection to the Force. "As far as the Jedi go, they did come for him. His father threw them out, just as each Onasi patriarch had done before. And," she added to emphasize the point, "He never told Carth or his mother."
"How do you know this?"
"Embodiment has its privileges," she said realizing, that in her state, she was saying things she shouldn't say.
Kwyn recognized that she was avoiding his question so he went on. "Okay, but surely the Council would recognize that he is Force Sensitive, wouldn't they."
Not when he's been shielded from those that use the Force since the night his wife died. "A few did, but what purpose would it serve to tell him when he does so much good in the Republic Navy. Besides, the Force hasn't exactly been his best bud, wouldn't you agree?"
Kwyn thought for a moment, and then nodded. "Then Dustil . . ."
"Almost as strong as his father."
"Then why is he a go-fer for the Council, why don't they train him?"
"Besides being . . ." she was going to say idiots, but decided that wouldn't look to good so she shook her head and said, "Dustil was a Sith."
"And you? Are you Sith?" Kwyn asked outright. Jaden appreciated his forthright nature. Carth was very lucky to have a friend like Kwyn. The man was loyal to the bone yet not afraid to speak his mind. It was refreshing to see after so many people become deferential when it came to the Force. Yes, it was all-powerful, could be good or evil and determine one's destiny, but elevating it to God-like status got on her nerves.
Jaden grinned as she rose from the chair and approached him.
"I am Sith. I am Jedi. I am the Force."
Jaden blinked away the stars in front of her eyes as she struggled to regain her breath. Canderous moved, unfocused, above her. "Had enough?" he asked.
She squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head. "One more." Canderous hesitated then helped her up.
"Mandalorian or Echani rules?"
"None."
Canderous was surprised but then narrowed his eyes at her, "No Force powers."
"Agreed," she mumbled, "I probably couldn't control them anyway."
"What the hell does that mean?" He demanded as he toweled off his sweat-covered chest. Jaden, despite her smaller size, was a good fighter and he hadn't had this kind of workout since he was in the training camp on Dxun before Vaklu attacked and had him arrested. She was quick and slippery, a little like chasing an oiled Gizka, and while that normally didn't interest him, sparing with Jaden proved to be a challenge.
"It means all that power is still here," she answered waving her hands in front of her, "not here," she thumped her chest, "where I can control it." He raised a brow. "It's like . . . food. You eat to replenish the energy you use. I need to use up my own energy so I can absorb more."
"So what did you do the last time?" He asked and immediately regretted it when Jaden blushed and turned away. He grunted in disgust.
After Jaden's conversation with Kwyn, she had checked on Carth, who was still in the Kolto tank. The doctor told her it would be a few more hours so she hunted up Canderous for a little hand-to-hand combat to help her absorb what she'd taken. So, now they were in one of the training rooms beating on each other. Atton and HK were sitting in the gallery with a few others, shouting advice to her, but it wasn't helping much against the tall, solidly built Mandalorian. Jaden didn't want to think about how many pounds Canderous had on her she just needed the exercise.
"Ready?" he asked and found himself thrown to his back by her sidekick to his midsection.
"Funny, I don't recall ever hearing you ask that during the Mandalorian wars."
Canderous flipped to his feet and the match was on. He swung at Jaden who blocked the blow with her left arm while leaning back. She turned slightly and jabbed her right elbow just under his ribcage. When he leaned forward, Jaden brought her knee up but he grabbed her foot to pull her off balance. Jaden executed a back flip and landed on both feet. Canderous side kicked her and she slid across the mat.
~~ He is no match for you. ~~
~~ I won't cheat. ~~
~~Trusting what you are, is not cheating. He knows his abilities and uses them. Use what you know. ~~
Ten minutes later, Jaden sat on his chest, breathing heavily, with her arms pumping the air soaking in the cheers from the gallery. "You can get up now," Canderous groused but she recognized the admiration behind the tone. Jaden looked down at him and grinned. This last match had gone longer than the others had, with Jaden countering each of his moves and letting her reflexes guide her actions. She was proud of each of her bruises and would allow them to heal unaided. Even the one on her chin.
"You didn't let me win, did you?" She asked as she moved and offered her hand to help him. Canderous frowned at her.
"There is no honor in throwing a fight," he answered getting up slowly.
"Thank you," she said touching his face and healing him in the process.
"Humph."
Jaden dropped the towel and looked at her nude body in the mirror. She had gone to Carth's quarters to clean up after her bout with Canderous and stood looking over her right shoulder, pleased to see her birthmark was brighter which meant she was stronger. The bruise on her left shoulder, however, was a dark mass of purples and blacks. She had a few bruises on her arms and legs, but the colorful display of blues, yellows and greens on her right hip had her grimacing then grinning. At the last, she had given as good as she got. It hurt a little to smile, but her lip and jaw would heal.
Dressed in leggings and one of Carth's comfortable old shirts, she began putting away the laundry the ships' cleaners had returned. She enjoyed the domestic task and knew it was another memory she would tuck away and take with her when this was over.
"You never put your own clothes away."
Jaden turned and smiled. "Mama!"
"I also didn't teach you to brawl like a bully in a school yard," Alcinia said with a frown.
"I know all kinds of things you never taught me," Jaden said with a grin as she swung her arms back and forth like a little girl hiding a secret. Alcinia cocked a brow. "Mom, I beat Mandalore, the leader of the Mandalorians!" She said excitedly.
"So did Revan."
"Not in hand-to-hand," Jaden said petulantly. Alcinia sighed and shook her head, but there was a smile tugging at her lips. "Why are you here? I didn't think I'd see you again." Jaden asked with the pleasure of the unexpected surprise clear in her tone.
"They asked, and I said yes."
Jaden, the thrill of beating Canderous fading, inquired warily, "What did they ask?"
"They are . . . upset and pleased with you. Or, perhaps, they thought only a mother could deal with you?" She teased sitting on the end of the bed and patting the spot beside her. Jaden sat with a sigh and Alcinia wanted so badly to hold her daughter once more. There were so few times that Jaden could be her true self when so much rested on her shoulders.
"Lay it on me."
"You told the Exile of his connection to the Force."
"I didn't lie," Jaden said quickly and defensively then sighed. "I couldn't very well tell Zared the truth, truth, now could I. He'd have been here in a heartbeat, killed me, then gone back for the keys."
"But he saw what you were doing," Alcinia told her as only a mother could when trying to correct their daughters behavior.
Jaden nodded. "I know. Stupid mistake on my part, I know that. I endangered Carth unnecessarily. I didn't stop and think that the dark side may have gained that much ground."
"Jaden, you also gave the Exile a weapon he can use against you. He knows of your . . . feelings for the Admiral."
"He won't come for him, if that's what they're thinking," she said looking at her fingers.
"Are you certain? You took Revan from him and Zared cared very deeply for her."
Jaden got up and wandered to the window. The hyperspace route was a blur as it went by and she imagined the sound of the ocean as the waves of the route crashed against the hull of the ship. It was soothing, so when she thought about Zared coming after Carth, the fear that thought would have brought yesterday wasn't there. Was she sure, Zared wouldn't come after Carth? "He won't," she said softly.
"Why?" Alcinia asked tipping her head as she watched her daughter. She wanted to spare Jaden the realization she was coming to understand. No matter how much a parent wanted to protect their children, there were some things they had to learn on their own.
As Jaden watched the route, she could no longer deny that the truth had always been there. She had desperately pushed it aside because she didn't want to lose the one constant in her life, his voice, but no amount of denial would change the outcome. Jaden turned to her mother, her eyes brimming with tears. "Because Zared knows I will sacrifice what is necessary to win. Just as he did," she reluctantly admitted. Her spirit plummeted with the final acceptance that no matter how hard she tried; she wasn't going to be able to save Carth; he didn't matter in the grand scheme of things.
"You almost did."
"Yeah," Jaden said with a sigh.
"Why did you take so much? His connection to the Force, to you, was almost severed."
Jaden moaned and sat in a chair in the corner. This morning, their clothes had landed haphazardly on the seat, where Carth had picked them up from the night before. "He's going to want to do this again. I figured, since the medical facilities were handy, I would take as much as possible now. That way, in the future, I wouldn't have to take as much."
"And you wouldn't hurt him."
Jaden nodded as the misery she was feeling at accepting his fate by her hand, began to ripple out from her. There has to be another way!
"I wish I could make this easier for you, daughter. It is difficult to love knowing what must be done, so that others can live."
"So how did you do it?"
"Choice and free will are wonderful things," Alcinia said softly. "Sometimes though, there is no choice when your needs are insignificant compared to the needs of others. I knew you would leave me the moment you were conceived. I had five wonderful years with you and I have watched you grow into a woman without equal. It may be vanity, but I like to believe that how I raised you in those five years, has contributed to who you are today."
"It has. Well, except for the brawling part," Jaden added with a wry smile.
Alcinia chuckled, "At least you learned to put away your clothes."
"Is that the 'pleased' part of this conversation?" Jaden asked with a sad grin.
"That's my own personal triumph. No, what you did for Morgana Onasi."
Jaden looked at her mother curiously. "But I broke a few rules to do that."
"You fulfilled her greatest wish and healed a soul that had suffered for so long. He will be stronger for it, and from that Carth and his son will be able to move past old hurts and forgive accusations. You healed the wound that was deepest, the one that drove him. Now, he can find a measure of peace and happiness."
Just in time for him to die. "After all I have done to his life, it was a simple thing to do."
"Jaden," Alcinia sighed again aching to reach out and ease her daughter's guilt, "You are not to blame."
"It happened on my . . . watch."
"Jaden . . ."
"Mama, I can't change what has happened, I know that. I'm powerful, but not that powerful. If I can help them, any of them, find some forgiveness or peace, then I have done them a great service. Whatever happens, however this ends, I want," Jaden sniffed and wiped her eyes, "I need to know that I gave them a second chance at their lives; gave them something to live for after I have taken so much."
"Then of all your companions, that leaves only Atton. You restored Katarr strengthening Visas path in the light, healed Canderous and gave his life purpose, and reconciled a tortured voice. Atton has accepted what he's done in the past. What do you want for him?"
"Less of a smart mouth?" Jaden answered with a smile then sighed. "He may have accepted what he once was, but he refuses to move past it and accept what he can be."
"That is a tall order."
"I know, and one I may not be able to fill. However, if I can get him in the right direction, then that will have to be enough."
"I am very proud of you, Jaden."
At least someone is. "Thank you, that means a lot to me. You did raise me well, you know."
Alcinia smiled sadly, "My time is up."
Jaden frowned and went to stand before her mother, "So, soon?"
"The Admiral will be recovered soon. You should be there. He won't be happy to see you bruised," Alcinia said desperate to reach out and soothe her daughters injuries.
Jaden snorted, "Badges of honor. I doubt he'd believe me otherwise."
"Be careful, Jaden," she said and silently added, especially with your heart.
"Can I show you something?" Jaden asked softly with a childlike innocence. Alcinia looked at her daughter. She looked so guileless and so hopeful it broke her heart. She remembered that look whenever Jaden was particularly proud of something she had done.
"Of course," she said with a fond smile of remembrance.
"Vita vis vitea," Jaden whispered and a flash of light surrounded her. "It's one of the things I learned," she told her mother right before gathering her close. "I love you, Mom."
Alcinia's smile was stunningly beautiful as she held her daughter close once more.
