Hello again!
Thank you so much for the reviews and pm's and alerts, everything!
I just wanted to let you know that Natalie is not going to come between Charlie and Brax in this story, I'd never let that happen!
I hope you enjoy this Chapter x
CHAPTER 28- What's really going on?
"Milk no sugar, just how you like it" Charlie said, placing the coffee mug on the table, not too far from Brax
"Thanks" he smiled weakly at her, she returned his smile, for a mere second bringing her eyes up to meet his before focusing on the steamy mug in front of her
"I'm sorry" he said, placing his hand over hers, she looked on gently at their hands, reveling in the feeling of his touch for a small moment until reluctantly pulling away and tearing her gaze from his.
"You've got nothing to be sorry for, you're angry" she whispered, her voice trembling as she spoke
"Nup, nah I was drunk, I didn't mean what I said…going off at you like that…" he trailed off, hoping he hadn't pushed her away to the point of no return. His heart cracked at the core as a silent tear slid down her cheek "Hey, what are the tears for?" he asked, reaching over and gently tracing his thumb over her cheek, catching the tear as it fell
"Did you find my note?" she asked hesitantly, ignoring his last question, he silently nodded his head, bringing his eyes up to catch her gaze
"Yeah the afternoon you left, when I was at Angelo's" he said sadly, bringing his hand down from her cheek and resting it on the table, sweeping it in a brushing motion, something Charlie knew to well, he was nervous and shaken. She clamped her hand down softly on his, meeting his eyes
"You do that when you're nervous" she whispered, he smiled faintly at how much she knew him, how that one small action put his mind at ease, she'd found him out, now there was nowhere to hide
"Did you read it?" She asked hopefully, he gave her a small nod before breaking his hand away from hers and placing his own clasped together in front of him
"I read it, but I still don't get why you left…I'm still confused" he said, his eyes longing for her to explain, she nodded weakly bringing her path of sight away from his expectant, hopeful gaze and back to the oak table underneath her
"When Sid told me about um…" her voice shook as she spoke "the chances of having kids was getting slimmer…I thought you deserved better, but then seeing you with Leanne; it hurt, the thought of living without you seemed easier than the thought of seeing you holding someone else in your arms everyday and so I left, it felt like the easy way out." she felt Brax's gaze upon her, they sat in a awkward silence until Brax finally spoke up
"You do know I have no feelings for Leanne," he said gently "I still lo-" he stopped his sentence, changing his wording "care about you" Charlie shook her head abruptly
"If you cared me, you wouldn't have jumped into bed with her", both of them avoiding the L word that they felt strongly towards each other, tears fell down her cheeks as she spoke, he clenched his fists together and bowed his head at her words, she watched him through her clouded eyes,
He shook his head aggressively "You can't tell me how I feel Charlie,"
"I know that, I'm just stating what you already know"
Brax clenched his eyes shut, inhaling deeply as he spoke "Nup Charlie, I want you, only you, if I can't have kids with you, then I don't want kids at all" Brax said desperately, despite the searing pain of having her leave him, he still spoke how his heart felt about her
"You can't say that in two years time you'll feel the same," he looked at her, a tear falling from his eye, did she really think that he felt so little about her that he would leave her
"How could you say that Charlie?" he said, "Nothing, nothing could ever change how I feel about you-" he paused, his eyes meeting her gaze "You could of spoken to me about how you felt." she looked at him registering the sorrow in his eyes
"Don't say that."
"Don't say what?" he sighed "Charlie, do you have no trust in me?"
"I do." she replied instantly
"Do you?" he questioned, glaring at her from across the table "Because if you did you would have talked to me," he said, looking at her attentively
"Brax you said yourself, I'm damaged goods…" she finished in a whisper, recalling the events of the previous night in her head, his bewildered eyes looked on at her
"Charlie the last thing I wanted to do was hurt you," he said, burying his head in his hands, shaking his head aggressively
"But its still on the list." she stated quietly as if she were weary of his reaction "You should probably go, get back to Leanne"
"Did you not hear a word a just said-"
"No I heard you loud and clear"
"Is this the big problem, Leanne?" Brax asked, searching her expression for answers
"No, not really…" Charlie said anxiously, her fingers drumming on her coffee cup
"Nice to hear you're so sure about that one Charlie!"
"Brax-"
"I'm not leaving until you spill the beans," he said adamantly, leaning back and crossing his arms "And even though that door's wide open, you won't leave, because you won't be able to stay away either."
"You should go."
"I told you no."
"Well I'm telling you, I don't want to talk. And you shouldn't be here, making sure I'm ok, when blondie is probably looking for you"
"Oh yeah and says who?" Brax said, frustrated
"Say's me!" Charlie shouted, her hands slamming down on the table, her tone matching his before Brax could answer the tapping of footsteps sounded through the kitchen, Brax ran his fingers through his hair, cursing his brother and Bianca for walking in on them
"Sorry are we interrupting?" Bianca asked as she noticed the awkward tension between the two. Brax shifted uncomfortably in his seat, his eyes darting away from Charlie's, Bianca looked at Charlie, her eyes full of confusion
"No, nope Brax was just leaving." Charlie said uneasily, her eyes registering the abrupt movement of Brax's figure, Charlie brushed her cheeks with the back of her hand, wiping away the remaining tears as Brax paced silently out of the house. She sucked in a deep breath as he left without a word, resisting the urge to break down in front of her best friend and Heath.
…..
"I take it there's no point in me asking how your day's been then?" Bianca asked as she eased herself down into the couch next to Charlie, tucking one leg underneath her and staring at her friend with pleading eyes
"No, no there's not much point." Charlie sighed before turning to her friend who had a questioning look on her face "God how do I manage to screw everything up Bianca!" Charlie exclaimed, throwing her hands in the air
"You don't screw everything up Buckton, just the stuff with Brax." Heath said carelessly as he cracked open a beer and turned to the TV
"That's it Heath, you offer emotional support babe." Bianca scoffed
"Anytime," Heath said, rolling his eyes before sitting up and looking intently at Charlie "I'm just saying, you and Brax are both miserable why not just get it together? You both know more than anyone what its like to waste valued time yet you still insist on wasting more, I don't get either of you"
Bianca dismissed Heaths fairly logical comment and turned back to Charlie "You know what you need to get your mind off of things?" She said excitedly, Charlie looked back nervously
"A girls night in, me, you, Leah, Marilyn and Roo, oh and the new councilor, oh what's her name?"
"Natalie." Heath butted in, earning a curious look from Bianca and Charlie
"She's Casey's councilor ok? I'm innocent!" He laughed, holding his hands up in surrender
"Casey has a councilor? Brax never said anything." Charlie said, still confused
"Well Buckton, considering you haven't been on talking terms for the past week and a half, he's not gonna come running to you about his brother problems is he?" Heath scoffed, shaking his head in disbelief, turning back to Charlie, and shooting her an apologetic look before smiling cheekily at her best friend
"Friday, girls night in, deal?" Bianca asked, holding her hand out for Charlie to shake it. Charlie's lips sheepishly curled into a small smile before firmly shaking her friends hand, both of them wearing cheeky grins on their faces.
…..
He sat staring blissfully out to the horizon, trying to push back the memories of the past hour to the back of his mind. Trying to erase the images of her charcoal tear stained cheeks, as she looked deep into his heart. Failing deeply he found the only thought that floated through his mind was the fear that she may leave him again. Arriving on the beach usually brought him a sense of clarity, however this time he only found himself more confused than before, did she want to see him? Or was her coming back only for the sense of guilt she felt for not finalizing their break up? Or were the tears that fell down her cheeks as genuine as his? Did she miss him as much as he missed her or was Brax just trying to give himself false hope, was the thought of being with her unconditionally leading him to a fool's paradise? Groaning he picked up a pebble and skimmed it across the calm waters, his anger being conveyed in the harsh ripples erupting on the surface.
Struggling to find a feeling of content he slumped back down into the sand, it'd felt like he'd been here a life time, trying to get her image out of his head, yet somehow it'd only been ten minutes…the one person that taught him how to love and gave him the right to be loved had been the person to make his heart broken. Maybe he was just one of those people that have been destined to live a life of solitude, maybe he was better off that way, or maybe he was just trying to take the easy way out.
Walking down the beach Natalie squinted out to sea, her mind settled on her Casey's brother's distraught features when she met him the other night, her brain trying to piece him together as she trudged along, her mind finally settled on the sand below her, relishing in the feeling of the warm grains rushing over her feet as they sank into the sand, gazing up the beach she saw a familiar figure hunched over, holding something small in his hand and letting go with one harsh swipe that disrupted the sea's calm flow. She saw the intense lines on his brow crease even further
"Your look miserable you know that?" Natalie said, coming to a standstill in front of him, holding her sandals in one hand
"Do I, and let me guess you know that because you have a little certificate right?" Brax chuckled, looking at her and shaking his head
"No, anyone could see that." she said, taking a spot on the white sand next to him, she peered at him curiously, Brax just carried on ignoring her presence, pretending not to be annoyed by her existence in his personal space.
"Do you want to talk?" She offered, her eyes remaining glued on him
"Does it look like I want to talk?" He questioned
"I don't know, that's why I'm asking."
"Well no. No I don't," he said bluntly, waving his hands at her, gesturing goodbye in a bid to get her to go away. She didn't move. "Anything else?" he asked her, sticking out his bottom lip
"No, just Casey said you've had a lot on your plate lately, I just wondered if you wanted someone to talk to" She said blandly, he looked at her, not until then had he paid any attention to what she was rambling on about
"Did he now?" Brax scoffed "Well that's none of your business" Brax barked
"And Casey knows that, which is why he didn't tell me what was bothering you" She explained, raising her voice to match his
"Well good, he knows where his loyalty's lie," Brax said, nodding in approvement
"Yeah he does…But do you?" she said, shuffling sideways so she was facing him
"What's that supposed to mean?' Brax hissed
"Well it's just you seem quite distant, I'm wondering if Casey gets all the attention and support he needs right now?" Brax's head shot up abruptly, who was she to judge him
"Right and you got all that from one conversation did you?" She stared at his icy exterior as his cold eyes examined her, immediately making her feel intimidated by him "Just stay the hell away from me, and the rest of my family for that matter" he heaved himself up and walked briskly away from her, his mind still unable to rid it's thoughts of Charlie.
….
Witnessing the icy exchange, Ruby ran after Brax, watching as he slumped down "What was that all about?" Ruby asked
"Nothing, nothing just someone sticking their nose in where it's not welcome." he sighed, leaning back into the sand, using his arms for support
Ruby searched his hidden expression for a while before biting the bullet "Wanna talk?" She offered, Brax immediately shook his head aggressively, his gaze set firmly on the sand beneath him, not wanting Ruby to see the pain he was in
He regained his composure just enough to look up from the sand, still avoiding her eye contact "No not really…" he trailed off "Anyway, how are you going?"
"Alright I guess" Ruby mumbled
"That doesn't sound very convincing" Brax questioned, brushing the sand and patting the space next to him
"Casey's just been distant lately…for a week or two now…" Ruby explained, glancing at him questionably, hoping he'd have the answers she was searching for, only to be dumbfounded by his response
"Well you'd have better luck asking her than me." Brax sighed; pointing his index finger in the path the councilor took
"Who is she?" Ruby asked curiously, pointing over to Natalie's now distant figure
"Casey's 'councilor.' " Brax scorned
Ruby raised her eyebrows in delusion "Casey has a councilor?"
"Apparently so" Brax said mockingly, before his eyes lit up a little, his mind snapping up an idea "How about a daddy, daughter day out?" he asked hopefully, thinking getting away from the bay for the day would do them both good.
"For real?" she beamed
"For real." he clarified, chuckling at the grin on her face that looked like a child on Christmas morning "I was thinking about taking you to the city, shopping, lunch…" Brax trailed off, examining her now extremely excited expression
"Shopping really, me and you going shopping?" she laughed, imagining Brax buying clothes
"Yeah, don't laugh at me!" he said, punching her arms playfully
"I'm not laughing!" she said, struggling to breath through her fit of giggles
"I just thought it might help us both take our minds off of things," Brax said honestly
"Your on." Ruby nodded, pushing up off of her feet and holding out her hands to heave Brax up
"Good, listen I've got a few things at Angelo's to sort out but I'll pick you up at 11?" Brax offered, edging towards the direction to Angelo's
Ruby nodded, turning back to him as she headed home "Sure" she said, holding her thumbs up
"And make sure you let Charlie know." Brax said, pointing his index finger sternly at her
…
"Shopping, you and Brax?" Charlie questioned
"Yes, please, pretty please Charlie! It's a daddy daughter day out!" she begged, placing her hands together in prayer form as she battered her eye lashes at her mother. As much as Charlie's heart warmed at Ruby calling Brax dad, she couldn't help but feel guilty at how she'd let him become such a part of her life and now flushed him out as quickly as she could, not stopping to acknowledge Ruby's feelings towards him.
"Yes, but on one condition." Charlie said firmly "Be back by 5." she said, kissing her daughters forehead gently as she skipped out the door to find Brax.
…..
"I can't believe you've brought all that!" Ruby giggled as her and Brax strolled through Yabbie Creek, his arms weighed down with bags, some belonging to him and some for Ruby
He chuckled at her "You brutally forced me and ganged up on me with the shop lady!" he lied, nudging her in the ribs
"Did not!" she said, poking his arm roughly for payback
"Did too!" he said, straining his voice
Ruby giggled at him, hooking her arm around his so they walked arm in arm "Well I reckon you're trying to impress someone…" she teased, winking at him
"Really and who might that be?" Brax said, pretending to be dumbfounded by her mocking comment
"Just a someone." she giggled
…..
"What's on your mind?" Ruby asked, despite the natural conversation between the two, her intense glare on Brax hadn't gone unnoticed by him as they ate, Brax knew full well what she was getting at, she was bound to ask at some point.
"Nothing, its nothing" He said, running his hands over his face as he slumped into the chair "Nah just this stuff with Charlie and…" he threw his head back, letting out a loud sigh, shaking his head from side to side as he tried to piece together his emotions
"Its ok to talk about it you know" Ruby said reassuringly, giving him a light smile from across the table, dropping her knife and fork to her plate and glaring at him with some what pleading eyes from across the table
"I beg to differ" Brax sighed, rubbing his eyes
"She'll come round"
"Na, she won't not this time…She's got this idea in her head that us not being able to have kids means I don't want her anymore" The sadness in his voice earning him a sympathized look from Ruby
"But that's ridiculous, did you guys even talk about kids before?"
"We did, spoke about the future, having one or two maybe, I guess from Charlie's point of view she doesn't think she's worth it now." Brax said, attempting to swallow the lump in his throat that had arisen on thinking how he could never win her back.
"Well you need to ask yourself what you want."
"I know what I want, I want Charlie." Brax said honestly
"Do you love her?" Ruby asked, mentally kicking herself for asking such a stupid question
"Is that a trick question?"
"So I take it you and Leanne are at a dead end then…how serious are you guys?" Ruby said, peering at him, her eyes squinted slightly
"Not very; she's not your mum." Brax said genuinely, Ruby nodded her head before asking another question
"Do you miss her? Charlie?"
"Yep, yeah its just been difficult lately, with Casey and not having Heath around…" Brax explained, finishing off his food and scraping the table with the palm of his hand, trying to avoid the aching feeling arising in his chest at how much he yearned for one of her hugs, just to be held by her once more, make him feel the comfort that had lately been lost.
"You just wish you had her to talk to?" Ruby guessed, leaning her head in her hand
"Yeah, yeah something like that" Brax said, smiling warmly at how grown up Ruby was.
…
"We're back mother dearest" Ruby chirped enthusiastically as her and Brax bundled through the door, laden with shopping bags, her smile instantly fell upon examining Charlie's tear stained face, something she'd seen far too much of latey "Hey what's wrong?" She dropped the shopping bags to the floor in an instant, running up to her mother and encasing her in her warm arms
"Ah nothing…" Charlie mumbled into Ruby's shoulder unreassuringly "umm, what did you buy?" she said, sniffing back her tears and peering into the bags
"Well I brought a few new dresses, Brax however, invaded the whole shopping centre." Ruby laughed, batting her eyelids at Brax
"I have you know I was brutally forced." Brax said, holding his hands up in surrender
"Really?" Charlie chuckled, shaking her head as she looked at all the bags strewn over the kitchen, and these were just Ruby's "Honest, and for somebody who didn't want to go shopping with their ultra cool dad, I'd say we had a pretty good time" Brax said smugly smiling at Ruby
"Well for any teenager, the prospect of going shopping with dad is a social suicide." Charlie giggled, leaning up against the counter
"Well the shop lady seemed to think I was cool." Brax retaliated
"Yep…she was probably working on commission!" Charlie giggled, causing all three of them to erupt in fits of laughter, however Brax and Ruby watched as Charlie's smile slowly faded and was overcome with that same overwhelming sadness
"Are you sure you're ok Charlie?" Ruby said, stepping into her mother's arms
"Yeah, yeah just being silly" she nodded grievously, Ruby nodded uncertainly before carrying her bags up to her room, upon hearing her footsteps fade into the distance Brax turned to face Charlie, tentatively moving towards her
"So are you gonna tell me what's really going on?"
I hope you enjoyed that one, The reason for Charlie's tears will become clear in the next Chapter! x
