I apologize for the long, long wait for an update. I've been very busy. Hopefully you enjoy this update. –Sevy14


It'd been three hours since Severus had closed himself up, or rather, turned into his surly self. At first I was mad, mad that he just would suddenly be like that with me, but then as I got to think about it, I realized that it was because he's scared, just like me and that's ok. It's ok. But now, I don't really know what to do. I am supposed to go to Diagon Alley with Professor McGonnagal but I kind of want Severus to come along. I-I don't want to go through this alone, I need to tell him.

Knock. Knock.

"Severus?"

"I asked you not to disturb me."

"I know." This was a mistake.

"What do you want?"

"Never mind, I apologize for disturbing you." Get away. Get away. Just go lay down and relax.

"Hermione? Hermione? Where did she go?" How did she get away so fast? I'll never- "Bloody hell." I hate that door stop. Why do I even have it? "Hermione, where-Cortes out of my way blast cat."

I can hear him coming. I duck, hiding under the warm covers, I don't want him to find me. I feel silly, and I can't figure out why really. I suppose maybe this mood swing is just a part of being pregnant I don't know. It's quiet now. Did he walk past our room? Maybe he thinks that I left or that I-

"Why are you hiding from me? And why did you choose your hiding place to be under the covers?"

"Oh um, I got cold and it's warm under here…" That was lame and he knows it.

"You were hiding from me."

"N-no…"

"…"

"Maybe…"

"…"

"Ok fine. Yes. I was. You didn't want to be disturbed so I left." Were rather rude about it, I don't know why. Stupid.

I hate how she always calls me stupid. I'm not stupid. "Yes well, I was busy doing some work. And I would appreciate it if you would cease in calling me stupid."

"I hate that you always are in my head."

"Yes well… And I apologize for being rude, that was not my intention."

"You've been rude since we got back from your mums."

"…" She's right and there really wasn't a reason for you to be so. "I apologize."

"It's ok."

"You wanted to talk?"

"No…"

"You did, otherwise you wouldn't have knocked on my office door."

"Um, well I just-I just…" Spit it out. "I am afraid of going through this alone. I-I'm really scared and I'm supposed to go to Diagon Alley with Professor McGonnagal to-to, I actually don't know why, other than it's supposed to do with baby stuff, I just-I just don't want to be alone."

Sitting down beside her on the bed I see how scared she really is. Although she's trying hard to hide her fear, she wasn't successful. Her hands, shaking, shifting her eyes right and left, and she was very closed off, not open or confidant, sure of herself as usual. My wife, very young, without the guidance of her own mother is terrified about the situation she's in and I am helpless to fix her anxiousness or her fear. "I-I…" I don't know how to respond. This is by far something I have no area in dealing with.

He's thinking really hard and I know he's trying to be caring, trying to find the emotion to portray, I'm sure but I know he just doesn't know which one or how to express it. We must have sat like this, him beside me on the bed, me, trying to hide my fearfulness when he shifts, drawing me from my thoughts of fear, babies, my parents, his parents; I'm startled when I feel his arm wrap around me and he pulls me to him, my head resting upon his shoulder.

"I-I know that you are scared. Because you are really young, because you aren't ready, because of me and how I am, and I realize that you have dealt with a lot recently and I am aware how difficult I am to live with, I do."

While he's talking, he's rubbing my arm and squeezing it. I raise my head to look at him and notice his eyes are glossy and distant. Refocusing my attention to him, I continue listening.

"I just want you to know that I will be here for you, with you, every step of the way. And while my emotions are in check, I am happy, excited, and scared at the prospect of being a father, a husband, this process is new to me just as it is to you and-and even though I am grumpy and irritable, I shall try my best to be patient since your pregnancy is going to be hard for you emotionally and physically." All the while I'm talking, I am thinking about everything I ever wanted from my mother, my father, and from Tom. I had never been this honest or open with anyone and I could tell she was taken aback by my sudden outburst of openness. She is scared of being alone throughout this whole process and Molly Weasley's words come back to me, we won't be on the same page about this pregnancy because she's told me about it and now she'll experience it while I just watch her go through it. And that kind of scares me. "Hermione, are-are you ok?"

"I-yes. I'm fine, I think… I just, I don't know I suppose I'm tired."

"Oh…"

"Maybe I will take a nap. Would you want to lay down with me?"

No, I didn't. "Sure." But maybe I need to do more for her, be more available.

"Ok."

Laying there, I can feel him breathing, it's steady and calm and it seems so strange to me. My heart felt as though it was going to beat out of my chest while his was just calmly beating, thump, thump. Slowly I feel my body relaxe and I turn over, my body facing his outstretched one, and I tentatively put my leg over his and my arm over his stomach, my body being drawn closer to him when he moves his arm to encircle me and pull me close. He's warm and it's nice in a way. Just laying here and we're not talking but we're connecting and I feel warm, safe, for the first time in months, I felt content, with happiness on the hinges of my reality. "Sigh…"

"Are you alright?" Her sigh had startled me, it was so quiet and calm that I had been falling asleep myself.

"Yes. Just thinking."

"Oh…" Well that isn't new.

"Yeah…"


And that's that. For now. I hope you enjoyed this short update. Hopefully I'll have more time to write, but I'm busy with school, we're in our last month, woohoo, but I shall try to write more for you my friends. Please review and let me know what you think. Have a lovely day. –Sevy14