Usual disclaimers apply.
Chapter 28
It was later that evening when Cyrene interrupted her daughter's melodic sharping of her sword with a gentle touch to her shoulder.
Xena looked up. "Hello Mother, something I can do for you?"
"Let's go down to the lake, little one, I'd like to talk with you."
Xena simply nodded and followed her mother down the well-trod path to the small lake near their camp.
Sitting on a fallen log, Cyrene waited for Xena to join her. Finally feeling the warrior sit next to her on the log, the women sat in silence watching the beauty of the lake in front of them for some time.
"Dinar for your thoughts, Daughter."
Xena smiled. "I was remembering that trip to your parent's farm when I was about eight or nine, Lyceus was around five, and Toris was about ten or eleven."
Cyrene smiled as Xena laid her head on her mother's shoulder. "Remember that lake we camped by?"
"How could I forget, that lake and three blistered bottoms later we were finally on our way." Cyrene chuckled. "You never did tell me what started that by the way.
Xena sat up and sighed, "Well, I guess it's safe to tell you now. Toris told me he didn't think I could beat him in a foot race. I did and he got mad, called me a cheater, so I pushed him in the lake. I didn't know he'd pull Lyceus in after him."
Cyrene sighed. "You and Toris always did fight like cats and dogs. But tell me, how is it Lyceus got involved?"
Xena chuckled. "Well, I jumped in to pull him out, he wasn't a very good swimmer yet, and when Toris finally got to shore, Lyceus kicked him in the nose before he could stand up. Toris tried to grab him and that's when I knocked the stuffing outta Toris."
"But not before he'd managed to blacken your eye if I remember correctly."
Xena laid her head once again on her mother's shoulder. "Yeah, but it was so worth it to watch his shock when that last loose tooth of his was shoved down his throat."
Cyrene put her arm around Xena. "Was it worth the workout you three gave my spoon that day?"
"Oh yeah, without a doubt," Xena chuckled before turning a little serious. "How did you do it mother, raise us three alone?"
"I managed, Xena, quite well I like to think, until Cortese," her voice dropped before she continued. "Now, tell me little one, why won't you spar with me?"
"I don't know what you mean."
"Xena," the single word spoke volumes.
Xena was silent before once again sitting up. Picking up a pebble, she tossed it at the lake watching as it skimmed over the surface. "I just don't."
"Afraid I'll beat you?" Cyrene teased.
Xena threw another stone and then another. "It would just be strange, that's all. I mean you're my mother, I shouldn't be sparring with you."
"Why not Xena?" Cyrene pressed watching as Xena began to fidget and throw more pebbles towards the lake.
"It just isn't right to spar with your mother," Xena tried again as another pebble left her hand and landed in the lake with a satisfying plop.
"Tell me why it isn't okay to spar with your mother, Xena."
"It could be seen as very disrespectful to leave one's mother beat up after a good round of sparring," the warrior tried to lighten her voice, but failed miserably.
"Tell me why you won't spar with me Xena, and this time try telling me the truth." Cyrene's hand reached out to stop her daughter's arm from throwing yet another pebble at the water.
Looking at her mother for a brief moment, Xena let her eyes wander to her hands sitting on her lap. "I don't want you to be disappointed in me."
"Look at me, little one," Cyrene commanded.
Xena instead picked up another pebble and threw it at the lake.
"Xena, look at me." Finally turning her daughter's head using fingers under the woman's chin, Cyrene locked blue eyes onto blue. "How could sparring with you cause me to be disappointed in you?"
Xena shrugged her shoulders and tried to look away, but Cyrene held her face firm. "Tell me, Xena. I want to know."
"If I spar with you, then you'll see the part of me that loves the fight, and the battle. That part of me that enjoys the violence. How could you not be disappointed in a child who likes fighting?" Xena paused and took a deep breath. "How many times growing up was I in trouble for what we're talking about? Fighting, I can't remember the number of times I'd end up over your knee for knocking the stuffing out of Toris, or one of his friends, or any other assorted child I'd deemed worthy of a good beating. You were always disappointed in me then, why not now?"
Cyrene's voice was gentle as she looked over the lake, "Xena, I wasn't always disappointed in you for fighting. Remember when you saved Lyceus from that bully? That boy had at least a good six inches on you and you still managed to protect your brother, or what about when you fought to stop Amos from stealing that mug of ale from the inn? Or, my personal favorite, do you remember the time you beat the tar out of Ethan for hitting his girlfriend in front of everyone? He was five years older than you and you still defended poor Ramona from him, and you won."
"Yeah, had the broken rib and bruises to prove it too."
"Yes, you did, but I was so proud of you for those fights, Xena. You were showing me just a small bit of the wonderful woman that I knew you were destined to grow up and become."
"You were proud of me?"
"More times than I've ever told you. Maybe I should have told you that more, Xena. Maybe that would have changed things after Cortese, I don't know."
"But you said you never wanted to see me again, after Lyceus…" Xena trailed off not sure if she could trust her voice.
"I was hurting, Xena. I know it doesn't make up for how I treated you, but I had lost my youngest child that day and felt as if I was losing my daughter too. I misplaced my anger towards you because you were there, were convenient. You don't know how many times I've lay awake thinking that maybe, maybe if I had embraced you in that moment instead of slapping you and rejecting you, Xena. If I'd done that, the Destroyer of Nations never would have existed."
Opening her arms, Cyrene released a breath she didn't know she was holding as her daughter fell into them. Holding her child, Cyrene began to rock slightly on the log as she hummed allowing Xena, once again to feel safe in her arms.
***XENA***BARD****XENA***BARD***XENA****BARD***XENA***
Hearing footsteps, Xena slowly rose away from her mother and tried to smile at the bard.
"Sorry to interrupt, but I got tired of hearing Amazon war stories."
"It's alright, dear heart," Cyrene answered standing up and giving the bard a hug. "I need to check on dinner anyway."
"Gods Xena, this is becoming a habit. What did you do to get spanked this time?" Gabrielle asked noticing the warrior's red rimmed eyes.
"I didn't get spanked, Gabrielle," Xena's voice was quiet and she waited until Gabrielle had seated herself next to her on the log surprising the bard when she laid her head in the woman's lap finally allowing the tears to come.
Gabrielle tensed for a moment and then relaxed as she began stroking Xena's hair. She was silent allowing the warrior to have her tears for as long as she needed them. The bard knew that they would talk later and for now, only wanted to give her lover a feeling of safety as she allowed her emotions to show.
"Want to talk about it?" Gabrielle's voice was soft as she continued to stroke the warrior's hair gently.
"Mom and I had a sensitive chat," Xena sniffled quietly.
"Ah, well we all know how well you do those. No wonder there were tears," Gabrielle responded rubbing the tension from Xena's shoulder as the woman brought her legs up onto the log to fully lay sideways.
"Yeah," Xena sniffed again. "We talked…she told me she was proud of me, Gabrielle."
"Oh?"
"She's never told me that before. I didn't think she ever would after Cortese."
Gabrielle bent down and kissed Xena on the temple. "She loves you Xena, it's no wonder she's proud of you."
"Ya think?"
"No, I know so."
"Thanks Gabrielle."
"I love you too, Xena."
***XENA***BARD***XENA***BARD***XENA***BARD****
I hope you enjoyed the last chapter of Little Warrior. There will be an epilogue to follow soon.
To those of you who followed this story, or made it a favorite, thanks a bunch. It means a lot.
I am currently working on another story that will be ready to post soon, I hope.
Anyway- I can't believe Little Warrior has come to an end and promise to get you the epilogue as soon as I can.
Kikilia
