sanji's lowercased troubles!
chapter twenty the eighth.
"..."
"..."
"..."
"...Why aren't we talking?"
"Because... I don't know."
"Well, why are we outside, sitting on top of a railing that might break at any minute, and not talking? Luffy, if you drag people outside like this, there has to be a good reason!"
"Huh? Oh. Sorry, Nami. I was thinking."
"Yeah right. I bet you've never had a thought in your life." Nami wasn't thinking about what she was saying, just absentmindedly mumbling replies.
"Nami?"
"Yeah?"
"Um... Nami... I... Is Sanji dying?"
"WHAT? Not that I'm aware of!"
"Please tell me the truth! I know I act kiddish and stuff but I'm old enough to know, really!" Luffy sniffed pathetically, and curled up in a ball.
"Oh, Luffy... I'm sorry. We haven't really been explaining anything to you. It's... been hard. But let me tell you, Sanji is NOT dying. Just... um... sick."
"Like how?"
"Well, when you smoke for a long time, your body gets in the habit, right? And with smoking, there's chemicals that really get you in the habit, so when you try to stop, you get sick. You see?"
"Oh. But I think you should be able to get out of the habit pretty easy. Just puffing on a stick on fire, hmm?"
"No, remember the chemicals? See, they make your... um... blood and brain be in the habit, and it's very very hard to stop."
"I think I get it... thank you, Nami."
"Um, you're welcome! So, you see, it isn't going to get better overnight. Sanji needs lots of love and attention right now, don't get mad at him. Just do your best to be friendly."
"Ok! Um, and, I know I'm like, immature, but... I wanna know if Sanji gets sick. Ok? I mean sicker. You know. Don't hide things from me, ok?"
"Yes. I won't. Is that all you need, Captain?"
"Yeah... but can I have a hug?"
"Why?"
"Because I like being hugged."
"Well, I guess so. But seriously, if you ever need a hug again, go find Zoro. He likes you better than I do of course isn't that obvious mumble grumble moan groan..."
The red head gently squeezed Luffy in one thin arm and sighed. Of course he randomly hugged back, being deathly cheerful. Nami felt a sudden protective instinct, and whispered quietly, "I really am sorry about how we've been keeping you out of things."
"I know. I forgive you, of course." Luffy's voice wobbled and he seemed dangerously close to tears.
"Thanks. Now be quiet a little while. Look out at the clouds, enjoy the weather, just have some down time."
"Ok. Thank you too, Nami." Luffy hugged her tightly for a moment, then let go before the pressure would become uncomfortable. That's Luffy... Nami thought as she walked slowly away from the deck where Luffy now sat in a rare moment of relaxation. Always thinking of his Nakama. She vowed never to make her captain feel excluded again. The navigator was violently roused from her pensive thoughts by crashing into a wall of annoyed flesh.
"Oi! You just walked right into a person, you know! Apologize!"
"Oh- sorry! I didn't mean- oh it's only you, Zoro."
"And what's that supposed to mean? I bet you thought it was ero-chef."
"No, I thought you were... I don't know. I was confused."
"Heck, I'm confused too. Sanji is confusing. He's sick again."
"Well. No matter how confusing he is, you have to be nice to him. You can't imagine how hard it is for him!"
"Idiot. Leave me alone. The chef's asleep, you're a freak, tell me what's new."
"You're the idiot. Go see if Luffy's ok."
"What did you do to him now?"
"He told me how worried he was about being left out of all the news about Sanji. I explained carefully, but I don't know. Luffy seems pretty shaken up about something."
"Oh god! When the crew's life shatters, how come everyone asks me to pick up the pieces?!"
"You're a poet. You don't know how to pour juice but you're a poet. Now I've seen everything." Nami shook her head and wandered off down the hall, humming.
"What the bloody hell is her problem?" Zoro asked the walls before heading outside.
"Yo! Luffy! You ok?"
"What? Oh, yeah. I'm fine."
"You sure about that?"
"Yes!"
"Ok. Nami just said you looked kind of upset. Sorry I bothered you."
"It's ok. Anyway, did you see Sanji? Is he better? Did he get the chemickanackals out of his hair?"
"What?? I have no idea what you're talking ab- oh. Luffy, that takes a long time. But yes, he is a little better."
"GOOD. Hey Zoro?"
"Yes? Whaddya want now?"
"Do you love me?"
"What the bloody hell?!" Zoro blushed furiously.
"I mean like a Nakama!" Luffy blushed as well.
"Oh. Ok, then. Why don't you say to people next time, 'Do you love me as a friend?' or 'I really like you. Do you like me?' instead."
"Oh... I get it! But you didn't answer my question." Luffy pouted.
"Well, you're my captain, and yes, I do um, love you in the Nakama way. But seriously, learn to ask questions in less disturbing ways."
"I will! I'll become the BESTEST question asker in the world! Once I become pirate king, of course."
"...Good. That's real good. So are you ok now?"
"Yup! I'm happy! Can I have a hug?"
"What is your problem, Luffy? Sure. Whatever. I'll give you a hug."
Luffy didn't answer the question, he just curled up and hugged Zoro. "Thank you, marimo-head!"
"...What? You're going to call me that too now?"
"Yeah! Every time I call you that, chemickanackals fall off of Sanji's hair, and he gets a teensy-weensy bit better. I'm sure of it!"
"Wow. If you want to believe that, you can."
"I will. I'll make Sanji better! Everything will be ok!"
"Sure it will. Just keep being... um, positive. And go visit Sanji as soon as he wakes up."
"I WILL!"
"Shh! Keep it down!"
"(extremely loud whisper) I WILL!"
"Good. Good boy." Zoro patted Luffy's head and went to go take a much needed nap.
"I'm a good boy..." Luffy whispered to himself. "I'd better go wake up Sanji."
--Liney liney liney line!--
"Oh, Nami, thank you so much! I love it when you dress in a bikini and bring me presents!"
"Of course, Sanji! You deserve more than a bikini- or shall I say, less?" The red head giggled flirtatiously, adjusting her playboy-bunny ears and handed him a box. He tore it open and held the most beautiful, whitest, smoothest ciggarettes of the bestest quality. "AH NAMI! THANK YOU!"
But wait. I swore- I swore that I would quit. And Zoro signed in blood. Nami knows that, too. So... what's going on?
"Nami, I love you and your present, but I can't. I promised."
"Oh, don't be silly!"
"Um, what's gotten into you?!"
"Nothing, dear."
"I can't! I told Zoro and Luffy and Usopp and you, and even Zeff! So I c-can't!"
"WAKE UP, SANJI!!"
"Huh? No, Nami, I won't. I can't. I PROMISED."
Nami, rather than reply, transformed into a giant ciggarette in a bikini.
"AUGH! I... SWORE! I will not snoke you, besides, you aren't even Nami!"
"WAKE UP!"
"What?"
"You're dreaming!"
The chef opened his eyes and tried to sit up, only to find that the rubber-boy was sitting on him. "Ohmigod. I had a really lousy dream. It started out good though... Nami... in a bikini... and playboy-bunny ears... but then it got bad, really really bad. Thank you so much. THANK YOU, LUFFY!" Sanji hugged his captain tightly, laughing.
Luffy was, needless to say, confused, but he had gotten a hug, so, what matters?
"Hey Sanji, do you love me? I mean, um, er, yeah, you know..." Dang it! He said the question wrong again!
"P-p-p-ppppppp!" The blonde was speechless.
"I MEANT in the Nakama way! I just keep saying things wrong! Sorry!"
"Oh... yeah, sure. In the FRIEND way. Now, in the loooooooooove way, I know who I want!" He giggled.
"I'm... confused..."
"That's fine."
"Do the chemikanackanals in you hurt?"
"What??"
"You know. The ones that come out of ciggarettes."
"Those? No, they don't hurt. They just make you feel sick and want to smoke."
"I'm glad you don't hurt. You seemed really... I don't know, upset in that dream. I have bad dreams too, where I'm a kid and not strong and Higuma comes back to life and hurts you and everyone and I can't help and then he gets me and I wake up right before he stabs me in the neck!"
"Who's Higuma, again?"
"The bandit who got me when I was little."
"Oh yeah."
"Anyway, I was sad today because I dreamed that he got you. And I was too little to do anything! And Ace came to save me, but then he wasn't strong enough and I tried to help but you both just... died and it was my fault, too..." A tear ran down Luffy's face and dripped off his nose.
"I'm very sorry, Luffy. I know how it feels to be helpless." The chef put both arms around his captain and said quietly, "Are you sleepy?"
"Yeah. But if I sleep I'll have nightmares!"
"You won't have them. You can sleep here. I'll protect you from everything. Everything bad that could happen. You'll be safe."
"Really?"
"Yes. I won't let anything hurt you."
"Ok, then." The boy yawned and got under the covers, taking care not to squish the chef so badly as before. After just a few minutes he started to snore lightly. Sanji lay awake, staring at the ceiling and petting Luffy's hair very lightly.
"I'll protect you, Luffy..." He whispered to the sleeping captain. "I swear. I won't let anyone hurt you."
"I'll always keep you safe." The blonde closed his eyes. He patted Luffy's shoulder gently before joining his captain in a deep, dreamless sleep.
END.
AN: Gah. You people have convinced me to write Zoro with an R. :P
I like Luffy's character. I haven't written it much in this story, have I...
Sanji: Phshaw, like I would ever protect Luffy.
Luffy: Yay! I like this chapter! I get lots of hugs!
Zoro: No... freaking... comment.
Me: I think that this won't actually end in three chapters. I need more! And the SEQUEL is still hypothetical.
Review, and get Usopp. Wearing very very expensive Victoria's Secret lingerie!
Usopp: Eek! DON'T REVIEW!
Me: Shut up! Review! :D I love you all, review peoples! Hugs and kisses and butts to all who I love! (rambles on)
Ok, sorry.
Remember, Usopp in lingerie. Just click that little button.
