Sophia's heart was hammering in her chest, faster and faster the closer she came to the hospital. She rushed through the doors of the building, her breaths uneven from running. She hurried to the counter, hammering her fist on the desk when the woman behind it didn't look up from her paperwork.

"Excuse me," she said, trying to catch her breath. The woman still didn't look up, which irritated Sophia to no end.

"Excuse me," she said again, this time much louder.

The woman sighed and looked up, giving Sophia a bored look. "How can I help you?"

Sophia opened her mouth to ask where Felix was when she heard Ingrid called for her. She turned and was immediately pulled into a hug by the sweet woman. Sophia felt herself slightly relax in the warm embrace, her mind finally catching up to what had happened.

"Is he okay?" she whispered, her voice unstable.

"He's… stable. It's not life threatening, but…" Ingrid pulled away from the hug, and the tiniest bit relief Sophia felt was washed away by Ingrid's expression.

"I-I need to see him," she choked out, finally letting some of the tears break through. "Where is he?"

"Sophia-"

"Where is he?!"

Ingrid sighed, stepped back. "Down the hall, second door on your right, but-"

Before Ingrid could say anything else Sophia brushed passed her, and practically ran down the hall. She pushed open the door to Felix' room, but suddenly felt a bit hesitant to enter. She wanted to see him to make sure he was okay, but she also didn't want to see him hurt.

"Just come in already," came a harsh voice from inside the room, making Sophia jump. It sounded like Felix, but… different. She had heard him talk like that before, but never to her. Though, she thought nothing of it – he was probably just tired. With a deep breath, Sophia entered the room, her eyes falling on Felix as he sat upright in the hospital bed, wearing nothing but a hospital sheet.

Tears started to prick her eyes as she saw his bruises and cuts, and she rushed to his side.

"Oh Felix," she sniffed, reaching out to grab his hand, but he suddenly pulled it away before she could touch it. She let out a shaky breath as she frowned slightly at the rejection before meeting his eyes. As her green eyes locked on his grey ones, Sophia felt her heart sink to the pit of her stomach. His eyes were cold, empty, confused. Nothing like how her Felix would look at her.

"Who the hell are you?" he hissed as Sophia took a step back.

"Felix…" she whispered, the tears she was trying to hold back beginning to escape.

Just before she sank to the ground Ingrid rushed into the room, her hands reaching out to Sophia to stop her from falling. She shook her head repeatedly, clenching her eyes shut as Ingrid patted her back and shushed her with calming words.

"Who is she, Ingrid?" Felix voice broke through, only causing Sophia's heart to ache even more. He didn't recognize her. He didn't know who she was. How could he… how could he not know her?

"Ingrid," he said more demanding, "who is she and why is she here? How does she know my name?"

"Felix," Ingrid said sternly before continuing in a softer tone, "remember what the doctor said? You lost two years' worth of memories."

"No!" Sophia cried, her eyes wide as she looked at Ingrid and then at Felix. "No, no he can't- he can't have-" a sob escape her lips as she looked away from the blond boy she came to care for so much. "forgotten me…"

Ingrid pulled her in a tight hug, rubbing her back. Sophia's worst fear was to be left by the people she cared about and who loved her, but suddenly that fear didn't seem to be so bad anymore. At least she wouldn't have to see them ever again and be reminded of how they may have never loved her, or how they had betrayed her.

No, this was far worse.

Because he had left her, but he had also forgotten.

And she had to look him in the eyes and see him without him really seeing her.

Sophia's breathing became uneven as her worst fears haunted her mind. Her knees felt weak, and Ingrid couldn't calm her down of keep her up anymore. She heard Felix' voice, but not in the way she wanted to hear. He was cursing, yelled at his mother what the hell was happening to her.

Even on the brink of consciousness, Sophia couldn't even find the slightest bit of worry in his voice. Only anger. Only panic. Only confusion. It made her finally give into the darkness, because she didn't want to hear him. For once, he was only hurting her, and in the time she needed his comfort the most.


Sophia held the little plastic cup she was handed with water. She stared into the clear liquid, swirling it around a bit. She could hear people talk around her, but she wasn't paying attention. A nurse had come when she passed out and had brought her to a little room where she was now. She hadn't said a word since she had woken up, and was now sitting curled up on the bed.

She still couldn't process what had happened. Felix didn't remember her. He had been hit by a car and lost his memories. His memories of the last two years.

Gone.

All gone.

His memories could be restored, but it would take some time, and even then they weren't sure everything would return. It scared Sophia to think about the possibility that he might never remember her ever again, that he may never return to his old self. To the Felix she knew and came to care for. It scared her enough to set her running.

But she wasn't going to run. She was being selfish and scared while Felix was really the one who needed her help. She was stronger than this. She wasn't going to let Felix go through his alone just because she was being scared and selfish.

If he would never remember her again that was fine. She could get him to fall on love with her again. It would be easy. He fell for her when she was being a total bitch, if she was going to be a bit more like she was now he would soon teasing and kissing her again.

With new determination, Sophia looked up from her cup and got off the bed. Ingrid and the nurse looked up to look at her.

"I'm fine," she said, feeling braver than she had felt in a while. "I was just a bit in shock, I'm fine now."

"Just let me check-" the nurse started but Sophia waved her away.

"I'm fine," she hissed before turning to Ingrid. "What will happen to him?"

"I was planning on taking him in again and-" Ingrid started, a bit startled by Sophia's sudden change.

"No, he's coming back home with me."

"Sophia-"

"The past two years he had spent in his apartment, so if we want his memories back as soon as possible he needs to be in placed where those memories might be triggered. I don't think that that would happen if he stayed with you."

Ingrid sighed, rubbing her hands together. "You're right, of course, but I didn't know if you could take that, especially after you collapsed like that."

"Felix needs me, and I'm not going to be weak."

Ingrid placed her hands on Sophia's shoulders, looking her straight in the eyes. "It's okay if you can't handle him looking at you like that. It's not weakness. You've been through a lot, it's okay if you don't feel like having him around. Remember what I told you, he was in a bad state two years ago, and he doesn't remember ever recovering from it."

"And that's exactly why I have to help him," she said determent. "He has always been there for me, I want to return the favor for once."

After a moment, Ingrid nodded and let go of her shoulders. "You want to speak to him?"

Sophia simple nodded, and Ingrid stepped aside.


After taking a deep breath, Sophia walked into the hospital room. Felix came into view, his back turned to her as he lay on the bed, facing the window. She stopped when she was beside his bed, her hands itching to reach out to him and hold him close to her, but she shoved them in her hoodie pockets instead. Outside it was raining, and the ticking of the raindrops on the window was the only sound, besides Felix' breathing, that filled the room.

"I know you're awake," she said softly, almost a whisper. She had come to know Felix rather well, and she knew that he would never feel comfortable enough in a hospital bed to sleep unless he was extremely tired or if she was holding him.

"Who are you?" he replied, keeping his back turned to her.

"I'm… Sophia," she said, sitting down on the edge of the bed. She can feel him tense up a bit, and it send a painful ache through her.

She heard him whisper her name before saying a bit louder, "Who are you to me?"

The love of your life, the broken girl you've mend… "Your roommate," she settles for instead.

Felix finally moved to sit upright, and Sophia reached out to help him, but he flinched away from her touch, as if she was fire that burned his skin. She held her hands to her chest, looking down at the sheets. It hurt more than she imagined it would, but she had to stay strong, she had to help him as much as she could.

"Why are you here?" he asked, breaking through her thoughts with his ice like voice. Where had all the warmth he once spoke with run off to?

"I needed to speak with you," she told him as she looked up at him, meeting his stone, grey eyes. Have they always been so empty? Behind his love for her, the warmth he masked them with, was he always so empty?

"About what?" he snarled impatiently, but Sophia didn't flinch at his harsh tone. To be honest, she had turned numb the moment she looked into his eyes, because it made her realize how much they actually are the same. Maybe she could use that knowledge to her advantage in bringing his memories back.

"I'm taking you home when you are released from the hospital."

Felix scoffed, looking out the window and away from her. "I'm not going anywhere with you. I don't know you, and I don't want to know you."

That stung, but she pushed the pain away for now. He didn't mean it, after all. "Felix, the doctor said that if you want your memories to return you need to be at places that might trigger them. You've spend most of the last two years at your apartment, and you've also started spending a lot of time with me. Going back to Ingrid would only slow your recovery."

"Too bad," he grumbled, still looking out the window. "I don't want to be anywhere near you."

"And why not?" Her hurt was starting to be replayed by a bit of anger. He's being childish, and she was already tired of this stupid behaver of his.

"Because you're annoying," he shot at her, turning his head to her and glaring, but he didn't expect her to glare right back at him. She's handled with far more stupid and infuriating people before, so she knew what would make them blink, and maybe even take a step back.

"Oh, I'm annoying to you, alright." Sophia leaned closer, poking his chest as he leaned back, away from her. "But so are you. You think you have any power? Do you really think you're in a position to talk me down and insult me? You are the one who got hit by a car, you are the one who lost his memories, and you are the one who left me without even leaving a little note only to find you in this state and have you yell at me about how you don't want to be anywhere near me?! I'm the one who is supposed to be pissed! I'm the one who should be angry at the whole situation! Not you!"

Felix blinked at her with wide eyes, his cheeks actually turning a bit red from embarrassment or maybe something else, she didn't know. All she knew was that her breaths were coming a little too fast, and that the heart monitor next to the bed was beeping faster than it was before. Good. At least her words at some effect on him, or it was the closeness their bodies. He did wear nothing but a hospital gown, and she was the first girl to ever have him react to physically and mentally. But that was not the point right now.

After taking a deep, calming breath, her eyes closing for a second, Sophia looked back into his cold, grey eyes, and said more gently, "Let's just go home."

And even if it was for a second, his walls crumbled, and a bit of her Felix shone through his eyes. It was brief, and with a blink it was gone again. But it was there, and it gave her hope that perhaps, for once, everything would be alright in the end.

Felix nodded, and Sophia sat back with a sigh as he looked at the window again. "I'll go with you, but only if Ingrid agrees."

Not mom, not mother. No. Ingrid was still Ingrid, and even though he spoke with affection for her, Sophia could still tell the distance between them. It only than occurred to her how tired and sad Ingrid actually had looked. This was hard for her too, more than Sophia had imagined. Maybe it was even harder because she was his mother, and Sophia was merely his girlfriend. Sophia really shouldn't be so whiny about the situation, other people had it worse.

"I have to go now," she said softly, looking down at his hand while trying to keep herself from reaching out to him. "I'll see you later, goodnight."

He didn't respond, only kept staring out the window at the darkened sky and the raindrops on the glass as she left the room. But just before the door closed behind her, she heard a faint 'Goodnight, Sophia.' It brought a small smile on her lips, even though she might had imagined it.

It was going to be alright.


A/N: Reviews are always welcome :)

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