My vampire leaned against his Volvo and a red-haired man slung his arms around him. Heat and power shot through my veins and this time, I didn´t fight my inner wolf back, quit the opposite, I let him take control. Only seconds later I stood on four paws andgrowled at the man, who dared to touch my boyfriend.
The young man swirled around and reacted immediately, he backed away from Edward, shifted into his wolf-form and took up position between me and the vampire. I snarled while I crept up closer to the reddish wolf.
Edward shouted something but I was too fixated on the wolf in front of me, to get the meaning of his words. His voice was just another background noise to me. I growled again and the red one jerked, though he didn´t try to run away.
I was ready to attack the other wolf, but from the corner of my eye I noticed a movement which caught my attention. I turned my head and was frozen on the spot as I noticed Edward just a few yards away from me.
It was the first time I saw him through the eyes of my wolf and – even if I have never thought this would be possible – he looked even more gorgeous as I´ve ever realized and his scent was absolutely intoxicating. My human senses have never been enough, to let me see his real being. Edward was so damned beautiful and all I wanted in that moment was that he would brush his fingers through my fur.
My anger was gone and I cursed myself for the stupid jealousy. Who cares if Edward hugs other people? If it makes him happy he could hug everyone he likes and after all, his happiness was the most important thing for me.
I was too distracted by the gorgeous man in front of me, to notice what the other wolf was going to do. His attack came completely out of the blue.
The following fight – if you could call it a fight – only lasted a few minutes. It was surprisingly easy, to beat the smaller wolf; nevertheless I was damned proud to win in my first fight.
As soon as the red wolf has realized that there was no chance to get out off my grip he gave in, he whined and raised his head to present me his throat. Even I knew that this was the ultimate wolfish way of submission and my reaction was instinctively; I licked over his face.
If I would have seen the consequences, I had never done it; I thought I was going insane, because suddenly I heard his voice loud and clear. Not with my ears but straight in my head and if his voice – he begged me not to hurt Edward - wouldn´t be enough, I also knew what the guy was thinking and feeling, it was really creepy.
Edward watched our interactions with interest, but he still didn´t interfere. Jamie nuzzled his nose into my fur and all he was thinking of, was my vampire. I didn´t get why I was able to hear this, but I didn´t like it one bit. Whether Edward sensed my confusion, or if he just saw the silent plea in my eyes, I don´t know, but finally he gave me what I needed – an explanation.
"I know that you can hear him in your mind but don´t be afraid, honey; That´s just the way of communication within a pack."
A pack? Holy shit! Why on earth had no one told me that I would be a pack-member as soon as I shift into wolf-form? That wasn´t fair and worst of all I had no clue if it would be possible to hide my thoughts, in the way I did it with Edward while I was connected with another wolf.
I was horrified but Edward smiled at me and tried to sooth me – certainly he had known that this would happen and he hasn´t stopped me from making this mistake.
Without thinking, I phased back into human and shouted at my master "Why do you do this to me? I don´t want to be in his fucking pack. I´m fine without foreign voices in my head and most of all I don´t want to know what HE is thinking" I pointed at the red wolf whose eyes were glued on me, ready to attack me again if it would be necessary to protect Edward.
"I have done nothing baby and by the way it´s not his pack it´s yours. You´re the alpha wolf, Jamie just submitted to you during your fight, that´s why he´s automatically your pack-mate."
"Then, why haven´t you stopped me? I don´t like to share my thoughts with a guy who is in love with you."
Momentarily Jamie howled, as if he would be in pain, he turned on his heels and dashed into the forest. Edward watched the scene with a sad smile on his face whilst I was still glaring at him; I was still mad at him – in my opinion, he was responsible for the pack-thing.
"Calm down Jake! There was no reason to hurt his feelings. Jamie has already lost his original pack because of me and he is lonely without his brothers." While he was speaking Edward stretched out his hand to touch me, but against my desire to lean into his touch, I flinched.
"At least, you could have told me the truth! Why have you always claimed that he is just a friend? "
Edward sighed "Because he is. Until a few minutes ago he even thought I know nothing about his feelings for me."
"Sure, he kept it secret. That is ridiculous! You´re a mind-reader, he´s a fool if he believes you wouldn´t know about it."
The vampire smirked "You know it´s possible to keep me out of your mind, you´re pretty good in doing it permanently. Jamie isn´t able to shut me out, but I´ve never told him about my gift and he never confessed his love, so it was possible to stay friends."
Again he reached out for me and again I backed off. Another sigh "Honey, believe me. I don´t love him, I never did; well I love him like a brother but that´s all. Don´t be jealous."
"I am not jealous, I just don´t like that guy" I explained "I don´t want him in my pack."
"Not even if I beg you?"
"No!" I replied but since Edward was looking at me with pleading eyes it got harder to stick to my decision. Of course the man knew exactly which buttons to push, to get whatever he wants.
"Please Jake! I´m sure you´ll like Jamie once you got to know him. Give him a chance; do it for me." He said with a low, seducing voice while his fingers brushed over my bare chest – I gave in.
"I don´t promise to become friends with him, but since it seems to be so important to you, I´ll talk to him tomorrow after I have visited mom and dad. He´ll get his chance."
"Thank you!" he murmured and kissed me. It could have been a perfect moment, but somehow the kiss felt wrong. Of course I had agreed to grant his request, but just because it was impossible for me to refuse it, nevertheless I was still mad at Edward; it was his fault that I have to deal with this situation. If he haven´t cuddled with that boy, everything would be fine. I wished I would be brave enough to tell him that I wasn´t ready to lead a pack.
Abruptly Edward broke the kiss, averted his gaze and demanded "Shift!"
I didn´t scrutinize his order and an instant later I stood on my four paws again. Alerted I looked around, maybe there was someone who shouldn´t see me – god I´ve been naked all the time and everyone could have seen me – but not even with my sharp senses I found a hint of a stranger.
A bit puzzled I raised an eyebrow but Ed shook his head "Don´t ask, just go home Jake. I´ll ask someone to bring you some clothes." Without any explanation, he got in his Volvo and drove away, a few minutes I stood there and wondered what I have done wrong; probably he was angry because I didn´t kiss him back – damned. But, the heck with it! He should have sensed that I wasn´t in the right mood.
I raced through the forest and forgot all my problems for a while. It was magnificent to feel the squishy, mossy ground under my paws, or the tickle when branches and fern brushed through my fur; I was surrounded by all those wonderful noises and odors. I really enjoyed it and was almost sad when I reached the house much too soon.
Emmett already waited for me and handed me pants and – to my horror – a t-shirt. Slowly and unhappy I hide behind a bush, shifted and got dressed. I felt very uncomfortable without sleeves and turtleneck and couldn´t bring myself to leave my hiding-place.
"Ey Puppy, do you need a helping hand?" Emmett asked and with teary eyes, I get out of the scrub before he would think I´m too sappy to get dressed.
"It´s clearly too hot, to wear one of your hoodies and you shouldn´t hide…" the vampire grinned but stopped mid sentence and his smile vanished abruptly when he looked at me. I bowed my head in shame whilst he was probably staring at my scarred arms or at the nasty mark on my neck.
Suddenly he clasped me in his arms and without thinking I leaned my head against his broad chest – I sighed with relief because apparently he wasn´t too disgusted by me. "I´ll kill the bastard who did this to you. Gosh darn it! I don´t understand why Ed didn´t slay him. I would have done it, right away. Fucking hell! I am so sorry puppy."
"I´ll come over it, so don´t worry. But could you do me a favor and keep this to yourself? I don´t want anyone to know how unsavory I am."
"Jake you´re not…"
"Emmett, please just promise me not to speak about it."
He sighed "Promised, but if you ever need someone to talk to…"
"Thank you. You are a real friend." Hasn´t he realized how much I already trusted in him, that he was the only one I´ve told some things about my past? Perhaps I would take his offer – someday. For now, I just hoped he wouldn´t keep up our friendship out of pity.
"Wait a moment, I´m right back" he vanished in supernatural speed and a few moments later he came back with a navy blue hoodie. Deeply grateful I slipped into it and was finally ready to go inside.
Like every day I got a delicious meal – it seemed still a bit strange to me that Esme wasted her time with cooking for me – and while I was eating I told Emmett all the things about my family which I originally wanted to tell Edward. We also chatted a bit about Jamie and Eds sudden disappearance, slowly but surely I started to worry. Why was my master still not at home? Was he still mad at me?
Late at night I went into my room, where I tossed and turned sleeplessly in bed. Though at some point I must have fallen asleep because when I opened my eyes, bright daylight lightened the room and more important Edward sat on a chair and smiled at me, apparently he wasn´t angry anymore.
"Good morning honey. You´ve looked so cute, I wouldn´t wake you up." He said, came over to the huge bed and gave me an almost shy kiss.
"Where have you been?" I asked nosily – something I would never have dared a few months ago and I must confess it still felt strange and wrong to me.
"I´ve spent the night in the hospital." Carlisle, it´s always Carlisle; didn´t he see that his father hates me? That the older vampire would never accept me?
"When do you want to go to LaPush today? I guess I should call Jamie and inform him that you´ll be visiting him."
Obviously master Cullen has decided to ignore the happenings of the previous evening. He neither asked about the time I´ve spent with my parents, nor what I´ve done after he was gone - but it was okay. Emmett has been there for me and he has told me some interesting stories about wolfs and even more interesting facts about my role as an alpha.
"I have changed my mind about Jamie. I´ll accept him as a pack-brother and I swear, I´ll never hold his love for you against him but in return you have to promise me something."
Edward looked surprised and a bit skeptical when he replied "That depends on what you want. What are you gonna do if I would say no?"
I knew it was wrong, I knew it was mean but it was the perfect opportunity "I am his alpha now and if you don´t agree to my little demand I´ll forbid him to see you ever again."
The vampire winced and stared at me in disbelief, I almost admitted that I could never do something like this. I knew very well, how it feels, to act against your own will and I would never force the boy to stay away from Edward.
"What do you want?"
"Stop talking to Carlisle and I´ll be a nice alpha."
"You asked too much of me! Carlisle is my dad and our conversations are really important. I think it won´t be a good idea to…"
"You don´t have to explain it, it´s just deal or no deal. It´s up to you!"
If Edward would have ever enlightened me, about the true nature of their talks, I would have never insisted on that stupid demand; quite the opposite I would have begged him to spend regularly time with his father. Unfortunately I didn´t know it back then - it would have spared us a lot of trouble if he had just told me the truth.
"Jake, honey, sometimes I just need to talk to him, besides we live in the same house" he said with a pleading voice.
"Of course you can chat with him; after all he is your father. Just don´t spend hours in his study or in the hospital." I restricted my requirement.
Edward considered his options and with every passing minute I became more and more insecure if it was really such a good idea to force him to choose between his father and one of his few real friends. I already wanted to ask him if we could just forget about it when he slightly nodded and took my hand. "We have a deal."
I can´t tell how many times I cursed that moment, my demand and his decision. Back then it felt awesome to get rid of Carlisles interventions - some time later I knew what a fool I´ve been.
