Ultra 64 introduces a new love interest for Zero in Mega Man X8!

ATUHOR'S NOSE: No nose here, folks.

It's sometime after an alternate version of Mega Man X6, where Zero doesn't lock himself in a capsule for a hundred years, thereby setting the scene for the Mega Man Zero series.

Dr. Ciel: So…. Does this mean that we don't exist?

Not in this timeline, baby. So in this future, a similar situation to a previous condensation is afoot. Robots have taken over the earth, because we humans are busy with other colonies. This time, we're on the moon. And I don't see Scrooge McDuck, so we're good.

Meanwhile, two cars on the newly-constructed Jakob Elevator think that they're playing Burnout 3, and one car takes the other out, causing the took out car to fall back down to earth, where it crashes in a fiery ball of fire. The newly-wussified title character Mega Man X is sent to investigate.

Mega Man X: Seriously? You guys call me down here for a car crash? I was doing some VERY important paperwork to get Signas out of here! He's really freakin' me out the way he's just… standing there, congratulating me and Zero on our successful missions nowadays.

???: AHEM

Mega Man X: Oh, and the n00b. Don't forget about the n00b from X7.

???: My name's Axl, dude.

Mega Man X: Axl the n00b from X7.

Axl: AAAARRRGGGHH!!!!

ANYWAY. X is investigating this car crash, when he sees the legally mandated effeminate minor character, Lumine. Oh, and a bunch of Sigmas, the complete opposite of effeminate minor characters. Vegeta, what does the scouter say about the Sigma level?

Vegeta: it's OVER NINE THOUSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND!!!!!!!

Mega Man X: What? Nine Thousand?

Turns out, they're not really Sigmas, they're just these New Generation reploids who can morph into crap, much like Double from X4, but more advanced and less psychotic. Lumine explains how.

Lumine: We're immune to the Maverick virus.

Mega Man X: huh. I never would've imagined that my great-great-great-grand… completely unrelated people would be immune to the malevolent computer program that's been plaguing our lives and caused the deaths of several good friends of ours. And I especially don't think that Axl is the blueprint for you lot.

Axl: Actually…

Mega Man X: Never mind. You can't be serious, Lumine.

Lumine: …

Mega Man X: You are serious, aren't you?

Lumine: yes.

It's not long before there's a mechaniloid radio problem somewhere in the Galapagos Islands. Wherein, after X, his badass blonde friend Zero, and the new guy Axl destroy that lot, they are greeted by an old friend of theirs.

Mega Man X: Dr. Cain?

Zero: Iris?

Axl: Vanishing Gungaroo?

WRONG.

Vile: Hey, dudes! I, like, shed my purple armor and stuff and, like, replaced that with green. Sweet! Oh, and I'm, like, taking this little dude with me.

So Vile, who has an inexplicable appearance despite disappearing after X3, the one we didn't do, kidnaps Lumine. At which point, our three intrepid android peeps head back to HQ, get Signas to resign, then meet the two newest navigators.

Layer: I'm the maverick specialist. I'm the one to go to for boss weaknesses. I also want to marry Zero.

Zero: Well, too bad. My heart belongs to a long dead friend of mine who I killed.

Layer: oh…

Zero: It's not your fault, don't worry about it.

And Axl meets his love interest. Or the equivalent thereof.

Palette: EWWW COOTIES!

Axl: Seriously? Cooties?

Palette: I have a deathly fear of them.

X, meanwhile, still has Alia. I'm not sure if that's a good thing or not. Nevertheless, Mavericks are going loose. X, Zero, and Axl use the brand-new-since-X7 tag team system to take on the Maverick Lairs. The Mavericks in the Maverick Lairs all pledge allegiance to some master.

Mavericks of X8: we have the following to offer this year, our master: Maverick Hunter heads!

Well, they all die. And after that happens, the Maverick Hunters get a call from that one bald guy.

Sigma: Hey, you guys. It's me. I've got nothing better to do, so I challenge you to a battle at the moon.

So what the Maverick Hunters do is fight their way to the Jakob Elevator, a long and grueling travel broken up by frequent enemy spawns and Vile returning.

Vile: Hey dudes! You'll, like, never make it to my boss, man.

X, Zero, and Axl beg to differ, and as such kick Vile's ass. Then they head to the Gateway space station, which coincidentally is in the SAME DAMN PLACE as Final Weapon and Space Colony Eurasia were like four and three games ago, respectively.

Mega Man X: Ah, this brings back memories.

Zero: Mostly bad ones, but memories nonetheless.

Axl: What are you talking about?

Mega Man X: We'll tell you when you're older.

They fight against the Eight AGAIN, and then accidentally trip over the self-destruct button, at which point they run like hell. Once they return to Maverick Hunter HQ, X realizes he's forgot something.

Mega Man X: I TOTALLY FORGOT ABOUT DR. LIGHT'S CAPSULES!

Good thing he caught that, because they're completely different this time. So once he brings all the capsule parts back, X, Zero, and Axl head up to the Moon, the one that Phantom of Krankor lives in.

Phantom of Krankor: WE LIKE IT VERY MUCH.

So the Maverick Hunters reach Vile first, who fights them one last time in his neat ride armor, and then they face off against Devil Sigma. Well, X runs in without any backup, and gets his ass handed to him for the trouble.

Sigma: Did you really think that would work this time?

Mega Man X: It worked for Zero back in X1.

Suddenly, Zero and Axl show up to save his sorry ass, correct him that that tactic didn't actually work that time, and together they down Baldie.

Sigma: I'm getting too old for this.

Lumine agrees, as it is revealed that he was behind everything alllll along.

Mega Man X: Even the Soul Eraser incident?

Zero: Even Repliforce?

Axl: Even that whole bit with Red Alert?

Well, not exactly everything.

Lumine: I am a new generation reploid. We can turn Maverick at will, which is nice. You old fogies don't even stand a chance.

Axl: Who you callin' old fogey?

They fight. Lumine soon is defeated, but then he turns into One Winged Lumine, and promptly… gets his ass handed to him AGAIN. But, just when the Maverick Hunters think they have won…

Lumine: LAST-DITCH TENTACLE RAPE ATTACK!

Axl: ACK!

That dark spaghetti noodle slash severely compromised Axl's systems, and he is KO'd. Now, the maverick hunters have won. But at what cost? TUNE IN NEXT TIME TO FIND OUT!

Mega Man X: Dude. Besides Command Mission, this is the last Mega Man X game.

Seriously? AWESOME!

ENDING MAN X