A/N: Thank you to Skullex, MaxRide14, StelzaRinator, Jazzcat1231, redsnow4, Marshmellowtime, Emoemu-san, KryptessEternal, umbreon241, Victorie Evans, winkz, RockerGirlAnime314, anniekins11, morganclaire1, and DragonMaster94.

HEY, GOOD NEWS! I'M NOT FRICKIN' DEAD! I am just really lazy, easily distracted, and completely unmotivated :/

Okay, so I can't even begin to say how sorry I am that this took so long. I just started feeling really bored with the story, and I never wanted to write it. BUT BEFORE YOU FREAK OUT, READ THIS:

I, vanillatwilight132941, promise to always finish a story that I have started. I will never go on hiatus, and no matter how long it takes, I will finish the story.

See that? Copy and pasted directly from my profile. If this happens again (though I pray it won't) don't give up on the story because I refuse to abandon it, dammit!

Well, now that I'm finally here, I have a few things I want to say before you read. First off, my friend DragonMaster94 recently got a fanfic account and I recommend you all check out his stories. He is an amazing writer :)

Secondly, I created a Facebook account under the name "Meridian Jaegerjaquez". I'm going to use it to keep people up to date on how my story progress is and why it's taking so long or if I have writer's block or some shit. So if you have Facebook, add me as a friend! And I promise I'm not some creeper who wants to stalk you or something. I just think it would be helpful to have your guys' input on stuff when I'm stuck, or if you have a suggestion or something. I always take ideas into consideration, hell I've used several of Max's. Anyway, I'm fucking stupid and don't know how to get a proper link to it, so just search me. I'm the only one on Facebook with that name :)

Let's see, there was something else...Oh! So, this chapter is officially the longest I have ever written. Ever. I shit you not, it's +5,000 words. I've seen chapters 3 times that length before, but for me this is one hell of an accomplishment :D

Oh yeah, there might be a tiny bit of OOC in the chapter, and I want to apologize to any Ichigo fangirls beforehand. You may not love this chapter as much as I do, seeing as I absolutely despise that damn ginger.

Well, that's it for now (I think). SO PLEASE READ, REVIEW AND ENJOY THIS CHAPPIE!


"Poke. Poke. Poke. Poke. Poke. Po-"

"Would you please stop?" Ichigo said in an obviously forced happy voice.

Zane grinned widely. "Nah, I don't feel like it." he replied.

He continued to poke Ichigo. He was hellbent on winning this bet, no matter what kind of cheap stunts he had to pull to do it.

He would resort to the lowest of lows if it meant winning.

Ichigo, apparently, was just as determined as Zane was. Not that he could blame the poor guy, he wouldn't want to be someone's bitch either. But his almost nonexistent sympathy for Ichigo wasn't going to change a thing. He was going to win. End of story.

Ichigo took several deep breaths and closed his eyes, trying to stay calm.

Ha, he was screwed. Zane hadn't even been doing this for 15 minutes, and already he was having trouble controlling his anger.

And Zane was just getting started.

He used both hands to poke him now, and instead of saying "Poke" he switched to "Bother".

Oh yeah. He was going Potter Puppet Pals on Ichigo's sorry orange ass.

Ichigo stood up and walked away from him quickly, and Zane got up and followed him. "Hey Strawberry, guess what?" he said.

"What."

"Your face! God dammit!" Zane yelled, before bursting into laughter.

Ichigo had a WTF look on his face. "What-"

"Your face! God dammit!" Zane yelled again, interrupting him.

Ichigo eye twitched, ever so slightly.

"Is that anger I detect?" Zane said with a smirk.

Ichigo scowled. "No-"

"Your face! God dammit!" Zane shouted, pointing his finger at Ichigo's face.

Ichigo turned on his heel and walked away very quickly, and Zane followed, still roaring in laughter.

Probably in an attempt to distract himself from Zane, Ichigo went straight for Rukia and started up a nice little conversation. Which Zane planned on ruining.

While they were talking, Ichigo looked much more relaxed. He apparently said something funny and Rukia laughed. Then Zane popped up out of pretty much no where and screamed, "AHH! ICHIRUKI! MY EYES! IT BURNS, IT BURNS!" All while covering his eyes and writhing on the ground in "pain".

Zane honestly didn't care about pairings. He didn't care about IchiRuki or IchiHime, or whatever else the fans' crazy minds thought up. He couldn't care less, but this made for a perfect opportunity to piss off Ichigo. Or at least Rukia, who would take her anger out on him. Which made it all worth it.

Both Ichigo and Rukia stared at him with their mouths open. At the same time, they both asked two different questions.

"What the hell's IchiRuki?" Ichigo said.

"Why does it make your eyes burn, you bastard?" Rukia growled.

Zane, still laying on the ground, started laughing. "I-it burns because we all know Ichigo's an unfaithful bastard!" he choked out between laughs.

"WHAT!" Ichigo managed to make it sound more like surprise than anger, so Zane hadn't won yet. Damn.

"How do you know?" Rukia demanded a bit angrily.

"B-because," Zane took a deep breath to stop the laughter and continued, "There are so many pairing involving him, there's no way he can be faithful to them all! I mean, think about it! There are pairings saying he should be with you, Orihime, Tatsuki, Nel, Grimmjow, Ulquiorra, Chad, Renji, Byakuya, I'm pretty sure I saw a couple fics where he was with Aizen, and even Isane! Isane, for fuck's sake! I don't think Strawberry has ever even talked to her, let alone dropped any kind of hint. So if he's fucking you, chances are he's fucking your brother and best friend, too."

Rukia's mouth was open in horror, and so was Ichigo's, but for a different reason. Ichigo was terrified because now he knew that Rukia would probably beat his ass and then demand to know who else he was allegedly fucking, and when he denied fucking anyone she would go find out the answer herself. Which could not end good. At all.

And sure enough, the pissed off little Soul Reaper turned on him, anger bright in her purple eyes. "Who else have you been fucking?" she hissed dangerously.

Ichigo held his hands up defensively in front of him, terror written all over his face. "Rukia, I swear to god, no one!"

"LIES!" Rukia screamed. She unsheathed her zanpakuto, which was regrettably still rubber, and launched herself at him.

And the beating she gave him made the beating Soi Fon gave Omaeda look like a goddamned tea party.


Later, after Rukia had finished beating the shit out of Ichigo, Zane was sitting on the platform, waiting.

And waiting.

And waiting.

And waiting.

He was waiting for the next two people to come. He knew they were coming, he had gotten that familiar feeling he always got when someone came through the gold portal. But for some reason, it was taking a while.

It was effectively pissing him off.

Finally, finally, the gold portal shimmered into view. Zane jumped to his feet, eager for whoever it was to get here already so he could go piss off Ichigo some more and win this damn bet already.

Stupid Strawberry was lasting longer than he thought he would.

The first person to walk through made Zane happy, because he could totally use this person to his advantage. He gave a mock bow and said, "Hiya Byakuya."

Byakuya shot him and icy glare and walked away, allowing the next person to come through. When Zane saw who it was, it made him even happier as he realized this person would probably be willing to help him win the bet.

With a mock salute, Zane said, "Yo, Toshiro."

And, to his immense surprise, Toshiro's temple barely throbbed as he dully replied, "It's Captain Hitsugaya."

Zane raised an eyebrow. "Tired or something?"

Toshiro sighed. "A bit, I suppose. Your sister is a nightmare."

Zane laughed. "No shit Sherlock."

Toshiro closed his eyes and rubbed his temples tiredly. "Damn, you sound just like her, too."

"I take offense to that!" Zane replied, crossing his arms in front of him.

"Good," Toshiro muttered. "Because it sure as hell wasn't a compliment."

Zane couldn't help but laugh again. "What did she do that scarred you so badly?"

This time Toshiro looked at him with wide, fearful eyes and shuddered.

Zane was shocked, to say the least. 'What the hell could Meridian have done to scare a Captain of the 13 Court Guard Squads this badly?' he thought.

"Awful, awful things." Toshiro muttered.

"Dude!" Zane yelled. "You can read minds? Why didn't you tell me!"

Toshiro's eye twitched violently at the familiarity of the words, but replied with, "You were thinking out loud."

Zane blinked. "Oh."

And the way Zane did that one action just like Meridian was so found of doing, especially when she was buzzed, pushed Toshiro to the brink of losing it.

"Hey man, you alright? You look like you're going to cry or something." Zane said.

"I'm fine." Toshiro replied in a strained voice, trying ridiculously hard not to start screaming his freaking head off.

"Are you sure? Because you look kind of pale. Maybe you-"

"I SAID I'M FINE, DAMMIT!" Toshiro screamed.

Zane took a couple steps back. "Alright alright, I get it, jeez."

Toshiro took a deep breath. "I'm sorry." he said. "You just sound so much like her, it's driving me insane."

Zane blinked. "Okay, seriously dude. What the hell did my sister do to you?"

Toshiro stared at him for a minute, and then began telling Zane every single thing that happened. Right down to the very last painfully awkward minute.

(A/N: I'm such an evil bitch! xD)

After his explanation, they both sat still. Slowly, Zane nodded his head. "Yup," he muttered. "That's sounds just like the kind of bullshit she would pull."

"It. Was. Terrible." Toshiro said. "I have never been brain raped that badly before."

Zane laughed, he couldn't help it. "Come on, it wasn't even that bad! I bet the way Rangiku sexually harasses you every day is worse. On second thought, sexual harassment from her might not be considered harassment any more..." he trailed off, lots of pictures going through his head.

Pictures of those big, beautiful, ripe...

...watermelons he and Meridian had eaten all last summer.

You were thinking something dirty, weren't you?

Shame on you!

Toshiro shuddered. "That conversation was worse than anything Matsumoto has ever tried to do."

Zane just shrugged. "Whatever you say, man. Hey, you want to help me with something?"

Toshiro looked at him in fear as Zane got that look in his eyes. That same look that Meridian got when she had an idea, which never ended well. Ever.

"God, please no." Toshiro practically cried, burying his face in his hands.

Zane rolled his eyes. "It involves pissing off Ichigo."

Toshiro hesitated before raising his head just barely enough to look at Zane. "...I'm listening."

Zane grinned evilly and began the explanation of his newest plan.


Roughly 30 minutes later, Zane's Epic Plan was ready for action. He had no doubt in his mind that it would work. Not only was it unnecessarily complicated, but he had gotten the entire Black Void in on it.

Except Ichigo, of course.

Zane stood on the platform, the Vizards standing around him in a loose circle. They played a vital role in his plan. It was their job to deliver messages and distractions and to make sure everything went smoothly. If something didn't go the way it was supposed to, it was the Vizards job to make it right again.

"Alright," Zane said. "Let's start the plan. Shinji, you got this?"

Shinji grinned. "Leave it to me." He jumped down from the platform over to Ichigo. They all watched as Shinji made up some lame ass excuse and stole Zangetsu away from Ichigo.

"Go Lisa, go!" Zane said quietly.

She nodded and jumped away.

Step 1 of Zane's Epic Plan – Steal Ichigo's Sword.

Done.

Step 2 of Zane's Epic Plan – The Fucking Triangle.

While Shinji kept Ichigo busy, Lisa ran over to Byakuya and, in a rather loud voice, said, "Hey, Captain Kuchiki. Are you aware of the fact that Ichigo is fucking your sister?"

Everyone around them turned to stare (Part of the plan. Everyone knew this was going to happen.) while a completely demonic aura surrounded Byakuya. Damn, he was a good actor. He disappeared using shunpo and appeared right in front of Ichigo.

Which was Shinji's cue to get the hell out of there.

While Shinji shunpo-ed away, Byakuya drew his sword. "Prepare to die, Ichigo Kurosaki."

Knowing he didn't stand a chance against Byakuya without his sword (regardless of the fact that they were rubber) Ichigo turned and ran.

"You suck, Lisa!" Ichigo shouted, although not angrily. Byakuya was chasing him, looking absolutely pissed.

"I guess even the thought of Ichigo fucking his sister pisses him off." Zane commented.

Shinji popped up beside him, laughing. "Yeah, I guess so."

Zane rolled his eyes and gave him a push. "Get the hell down there, your job isn't done yet."

"Yeah yeah, I know. Jeez." Shinji muttered, jumping back down towards them.

Shinji ran up next to Ichigo. "Hey buddy. You looking for this?" Shinji held up Zangetsu.

"Give that back, Shinji!" Ichigo yelled, looking like he was having a bit of trouble masking his anger.

Shinji laughed. "Nah, don't think I want to." Then he dashed away as a very pissed off Rukia appeared in front of Ichigo.

"You're fucking my brother?" she growled.

Ichigo's eyes widened. "What? Hell no!" He saw Lisa standing off to the side, grinning.

Then Rukia started chasing Ichigo (again), her sword drawn.

Ichigo was using an almost fake expression of terror to hid his anger. He only lost if he was visibly angry.

But Zane knew he was pretty pissed. Not being able to fight back was enough to set him off, but the fact that he couldn't fight back because of Shinji just added to it. Not to mention fake accusations are enough to piss anyone off.

Still grinning, Lisa glanced over at Zane. He smiled and gave a nod. Lisa nodded back and ran off to find Renji.

Several minutes later, Renji interrupted the two Kuchiki siblings. "YOU GUYS ARE FUCKING EACH OTHER? WHAT THE HELL!" he roared.

Seeing his chance, Ichigo escaped and ran like the wind to find Shinji and get his goddamned sword back.

Step 3 of Zane's Epic Plan – New Technique.

Lisa returned to the platform and Zane said, "You're up, Hiyori."

She gave a wicked grin and jumped down to find Kenpachi. Shinji was currently leading Ichigo on a wild goose chase all over the place until Hiyori delivered her message.

Which didn't take very long. Kenpachi was waiting for her and, in a voice loud enough for Ichigo to hear, she told him, "Hey Captain Zaraki! Did ya hear? Ichigo's sword isn't made of rubber anymore, and he's learned a special new technique that makes him super strong and practically invincible!"

Kenpachi grinned evilly. "Did he now?" he growled. He knew it was a lie, but he had agreed to Zane's plan on the condition that Ichigo fought him later.

"Yeah. He thinks he can whip your ass, too." Hiyori added.

"We'll see about that." Kenpachi growled, unsheathing his sword. "Yachiru, go find somewhere to play, okay?"

"Okay!" Yachiru chirped, jumping off his shoulder and running away.

"Let's fight, Kurosaki!" Kenpachi bellowed, chasing after him.

Ichigo looked over with an Oh-Shit expression on his face, and Shinji dashed away. Kenpachi rushed up behind him and swung down. He jumped to the side and barely missed getting his head cut off.

"Shit Kenpachi, it's a lie!" he screamed.

"You're just a pansy!" Kenpachi countered, swinging at Ichigo again. He ducked and Kenpachi swung again and again, barely missing Ichigo each time. Not having a chance to run, Ichigo was stuck there, dodging Kenpachi's attacks the best he could.

He was doing an admittedly good job, but Zane could tell his anger level was rising.

Along with his I'm-Afraid-For-My-Life-But-I'm-Not-Going-To-Admit-It level, because I don't care how strong you think you are, no one gets chased by Kenpachi without running the risk of shitting their britches.

Hiyori returned to the platform as Zane and the others enjoyed the show. They had to do something soon though, because while Kenpachi knew he wasn't supposed to actually hurt Ichigo, do you really think that's going to stop him from trying?

Zane just wanted him angry, not fucking dead.

'Although,' he thought. 'I really kind of wish Max and Meridian were here right now. They hate Ichigo, I'm sure they would absolutely love to see this.'

With that thought in mind, Zane whipped out his cell phone and started recording. He was only able to record a minute and a half, then he sent it to his dear sister.

All too soon, Zane figured it was time to intervene. Ichigo had already had one too many close calls. "Hachi!" he called. "Do the kido!"

Hachi nodded and made a diamond with his hands, directly in front of his head. The gap between his hands started glowing white as he mumbled a long string of words. This was a special Kido Hachi had invented himself. It allowed him to make a startlingly realistic projection of any image he had in his mind. It was absolutely no good in battle because the projection couldn't really do anything, but it was perfect for what Zane had in mind.

When the kido had finished, a projection of Chuck Norris was standing there.

Hiyori cupped her hands around her mouth and yelled, "Hey, Captain Zaraki! Think you can kick Chuck Norris' ass?"

"Bring it on!" The Chuck Norris projection yelled, posed in a cheesy karate move.

Distracted, Kenpachi looked over. Then he grinned.

Seeing his chance once again, Ichigo escaped.

Step 4 of Zane's Epic Plan – It's All Ichigo's Fault.

"Alright," Zane said. "You ready for the next one, Rose?"

With a flip of his hair, Rose replied, "Of course."

"Fantastic." Zane mumbled. "There's Momo. Go." He pointed down to where the little Lieutenant was.

Rose took off while Zane and the others watched. This one could get interesting.

They couldn't hear what Rose said as he chatted up Momo, but from the look on her face, it was exactly what Zane told him to say.

Rose was the perfect person for this one because of how dramatic he could be. Momo would have believed anything he said even if she wasn't in on this.

When Momo was so mad that she looked ready to kill something cute and furry, Rose took cover.

Meanwhile, Shinji had been taunting Ichigo with Zangetsu. Right now, it looked like a game. Ichigo would lunge at him, and Shinji would jump just out of his reach.

Momo interrupted that.

She came barreling at Ichigo like a bat out of hell, looking like a frickin' she-demon.

"How dare you!" She screeched like a banshee, clinging to Ichigo and throwing punches at him with her little fists.

"How dare I what? Owowowowow, hell Momo, that hurts!" Ichigo yelled. "What did I do?"

Momo was practically crying now. "H-how dare y-you make C-captain Aizen do t-that!"

"Do what? OW!"

"YOU! YOU MADE HIM BETRAY THE SOUL SOCIETY! IT WAS ALL YOUR FAULT!" Momo cried.

"Where are you guys getting this from?" Ichigo yelled. "I didn't do it, Momo! Aizen did it all on his own! Remember the therapist?"

"SCREW THE THERAPIST!" Momo yelled. "I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"

Ichigo sighed. Momo was attached to his back like a monkey, so grabbed her wrist and flipped her off him. She landed on her back on the ground in front of him with an "Oof!"

Ichigo crouched down next to her. "It wasn't my fault. You're just bat-shit crazy."

Momo peeked her eye open. "Oww. That hurt." She whined.

Then, out of seemingly nowhere, Toshiro was there next to him. "Kurosaki." His eyes were filled with anger, and his hand was gripping the hilt of his sword.

"You. Hurt. Momo. I hope you're ready to die. Slowly. And. Painfully." Toshiro growled out through clenched teeth. He narrowed his eyes and drew his sword, swinging at Ichigo.

Ichigo jumped back and barely managed to avoid Toshiro's rubber blade. "Why does everyone want to frickin' kill me? I didn't do anything!" he wailed.

Back up on the platform, Zane laughed. "You know what the best part of this is?" he said.

"What?" Lisa asked.

"None of these people are even acting. They all actually want to kill him." Zane laughed.

Lisa smiled. "That does make it much more entertaining." she agreed.

Unsurprisingly, considering his height, Toshiro was fast. Without his Bankai to help him out, Ichigo wasn't all that fast. Out of everyone who had chased Ichigo with their swords drawn today, Toshiro was the one to land some hits. Even with the bouncy material of the sword, Ichigo had some impressive bruises. Momo got up from the ground and joined Toshiro, and she actually managed to hit him once or twice.

"I have to admit," Zane said. "Ichigo is pretty good at this. I would've blown up after Step 1."

Kensei grunted beside him. "Yeah, I probably would have too. I gotta give the kid credit for staying in the game so long."

"Yeah, no kidding." Zane replied.

"When is it my turn?" Mashiro whined from behind them. "I wanna help make him mad!"

Zane laughed when Momo whacked Ichigo's head like he was a Whack-A-Mole and replied, "U-uh, now is probably a good time. Go find Aizen, and all that." He just waved for her to go because he was too distracted by how hilarious this was.

Mashiro cheered and jumped down to find Aizen and get the distraction ready so step 5 could begin. Zane didn't pay attention, he assumed Mashiro could handle it.

But, you know the saying. "Never assume, because it makes an ASS out of U and ME." Zane should know better than to assume things!

Mashiro screwed up. Bad. Which was somewhat ironic, because as a Vizard, it was her job to fix things that went wrong. Not cause them to go wrong.

She ran towards Aizen, waving her arms and screaming his name repeatedly. That was her first screw up. She was supposed to get Aizen ready without alerting Ichigo. Aizen, who was aware of that, tried to get her to shut the hell up, but the crazy girl didn't want to!

"Aizen, Aizen, Aizen!" She practically sang, skipping over to him. "Are you ready? It's time to end Step 4 of Zane's Epic Plan so we can start Step 5!"

"Yes Mashiro, I know. Try being quieter, we aren't supposed to-" Aizen was cut off by Mashiro being, well, Mashiro.

"Do you remember what you're supposed to do? You have to get in that random closet over there and hang your robes outside to distract Momo which will distract Toshiro and give Ichigo a chance to escape so Szayel and Uryu can start torturing him with a lecture before he trips over-" Mashiro was talking incredibly loudly, and even though everyone around her was trying to shut her up, she wouldn't!

"What are you talking about, Mashiro?" Ichigo demanded. He had heard her.

Zane started to panic. Oh, this was very bad. "Shut her up Kensei, shut her the hell up!"

"On it!" Kensei called, already halfway there.

"Zane's Epic Plan? What the hell is that?" Ichigo growled.

"It's the plan Zane came up with to make you lose the bet, and he got everyone in o-" Mashiro's explanation was cut off by Kensei clamping his hand over her mouth.

"Shut the hell up!" He yelled at her. "Ow!"

Kensei jerked his hand back. "Dammit Mashiro!"

She bared her teeth at him. "Don't do that, or I'll bite you again!"

Mashiro had thankfully stopped talking about his plan, but Ichigo had heard enough. He turned to Zane, and hot damn did he looked pissed.

"You. You did all this. Just to win. I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU!" Ichigo roared.

Zane laughed nervously. Oh wow, he was really fucking mad. "I-I win the bet! You're pissed!" he pointed out.

"NO SHIT. NOW DIE." Ichigo charged.

"UNOHANA! NOW WOULD BE A GREAT TIME FOR THAT SEDATIVE!" Zane yelled, terrified for his life. He had never before in his short life seen Ichigo so pissed off at anyone.

Ichigo was heading straight for him, but he tripped over something. Actually, it was a someone. He fell and landed face first on the ground, which only helped fuel his anger.

"What the hell?" Stark muttered, rubbing his head. He had been napping on the ground when Ichigo had tripped over him.

Ichigo didn't even spare a glance or apology at him and continued on his way. But that wasn't going to fly with Stark, and he reached out and grabbed Ichigo's ankle.

"Hey! The least you could do is apologize! You frickin' tripped over me!" Stark demanded, getting a bit angry.

"Shut up!" Ichigo yelled, to pissed to really care.

'Well damn.' Zane thought. 'This may have all gone to hell and we may have completely skipped Step 5, but I can still make Steps 6 and 7 work.'

Stark got up and drew his sword, glaring at Ichigo menacingly. "I don't have time for this! I gotta beat the crap out of him!" Ichigo pointed at Zane angrily.

"UNOHANA! SEDATIVE. NOW WOULD BE GOOD." Zane cried.

Before Stark had managed to chase Ichigo around like he was supposed to in Step 6, there was a tranquilizer dart stuck in his neck. His eyelids drooped and he was passed out on the ground in seconds, sound asleep.

That, however, left Ichigo free to attack Zane. As he turned his anger filled amber eyes on him, Zane could honestly admit he was this close to running away, screaming for his mommy. Ichigo was that damn terrifying.

"WRONG SEDATIVE UNOHANA, WRONG FREAKIN' ONE!" Zane yelled as he took off running. He may not stand a chance against Ichigo, but there was no way in hell he wasn't putting up a fight. Or rather, run for his fucking life while Unohana prepared the sedative.

"I'm pretty damn sure she's taking extra long just to further endanger my life. Because Unohana's just like that." Zane muttered as he ran.

Ichigo flash stepped directly in front of him, and Zane couldn't help the high-pitched and very girly sounding scream that escaped his lips. He turned and ran in a different direction before Ichigo could get him, only to have another scream escape as Ichigo blocked his path once more. Zane tried to run again, and Ichigo stopped him again.

Ichigo was everywhere! Damn, and he had thought Toshiro was fast.

Before Zane had a chance to run again (or at least try), Ichigo grabbed him, wrapping his fingers around Zane's neck. With one arm, Ichigo effortlessly lifted Zane off the ground, his fingers tightening their grip on his neck. Zane thrashed his legs around and clawed at Ichigo's fingers as his air supply was cut off. But Ichigo was much stronger than him, and Zane's blue eyes widened as he felt fear and panic rise in his chest.

'Holy hell, he's really going to kill me!' Zane thought as he started to feel a bit lightheaded. 'I don't want to die, I'm only 13! I'm way too young and good looking to die now!'

Ichigo froze suddenly, his eyes widening momentarily before his eyelids drooped. His fingers relaxed and Zane slipped from his grip, landing flat on his ass and breathing in large gulps of air. Ichigo's eyes slipped shut as he collapsed to the ground, a tranquilizer dart sticking out of the back of his neck.

Unohana stood behind him, holding a shot filled with a clear liquid. She knelt down beside him and injected the liquid into his arm.

"Thank...you...so...freakin'...much." Zane panted out. "I though...I was...dead."

"If I had not been here, you probably would have died." Unohana stated, although Zane only half believed her. Someone would have saved him, right? Right?

"What was the shot?" Zane asked, nodding towards it.

"A memory replacement. We needed something stronger than what we usually use on people." Unohana explained. "When he wakes up, he will remember losing the bet, only differently than how it actually happened. He won't remember all this, so he will not wish to kill you any longer, either."

Zane sighed in relief. "Thanks."


Several hours after Ichigo had woken up, said Strawberry was standing next to Zane. He was definitely angry, though not murderously so.

Was it probably a bad idea to piss off Ichigo after what happened last time?

Yeah. Like, a crazy, insanely bad idea.

Was this going to stop Zane?

Hell to the no.

You're probably wondering why Ichigo was angry, again. Well, after he woke up and realized he lost the bet, Zane wasted no time in celebrating and setting down some base rules for Ichigo. After all, he was Zane's bitch now.

Zane had been thinking about some ideas before the whole plan, and he had some good ones. After listening to Max and Meridian go on and on about some hot butler from some anime called Black Butler or Kuroshitsuji or some shit like that, Zane knew what he wanted Ichigo to do.

"Rule number 1," Zane said, holding up one finger. "Talk in a sexy British accent all the time."

Ichigo opened his mouth to protest, but Zane said, "You have to, you're my bitch."

Ichigo glared. Zane smirked.

"Rule number 2. You will address me as My Lord and after I have given you an order you will bow and say 'Yes, my Lord' before carrying out said order."

Ichigo didn't look any happier at this.

"Rule number 3." Zane continued. "There is a loophole to every order given, and I've no doubt you will find some. That's fine, as long as I don't directly say 'This is an order.' If I say that, no loopholes will be tolerated and you have to do whatever it is. No exceptions. Got it?"

Ichigo groaned. "Yeah yeah, I got it."

"I believe you just broke rule number 1." Zane said.

Ichigo glared. "My apologies, My Lord. I understand." Ichigo said in a British accent. It wasn't sexy (Zane would have been disturbed if it was), but it wasn't mocking either.

Zane nodded. "Good. Now for your first order. Ichigo, I order you to wear this." From his back Zane produced a pink bonnet full of frills.

Before Ichigo could refuse, Zane reminded him, "That's a direct order and you're my bitch. You have to."

With a mumbled curse, Ichigo snatched the bonnet from him and put it on. "I hate you." he mumbled.

"Ahem."

"...I hate you, My Lord."

"That's better." Zane said with a satisfied smirk.


A/N: Ha, so after I figured out what I wanted to do with this chapter, I had so much damn fun~

Once again, I apologize to Ichigo fangirls. Zane needed to win, and I was having fun, and it just kinda got out of hand...

Anywho, please review! Every review makes me feel super happy inside :D

OH! One more thing. I posted a story on my FictionPress account, and I'm seriously starting to get desperate. I have 1 reader (who I totally love for reviewing and supporting my story~) but seriously? I need more people to read it! I need more than just one person's feedback because I have no idea if I'm doing a good enough job with it! I promise it's better than the summary. What can I say, I suck at summaries. So please read it? Link is on my profile!

AND REVIEW THIS STORY. I MISS REVIEWS :'(

Oh, and Maxie dear? My mother doesn't know about the second Facebook account, and if she finds out, I'm quite literally dead. So if you decide to add me, be careful about what you say, m'kay? She has Facebook, too.