Merlin wouldn't move from the sofa. He remained curled up in a ball, crying, while watching Titanic. Gwen tried to coax him to watch a comedy, he refused. Morgana tried to convince him to have some freshly made chocolate cake, he refused. Lancelot called him a girl and then tried to get him to drink his pain away, he refused.

Gwen started shouting at Lancelot. Merlin barely heard her but he got the basics of it. She was angry because him and Arthur had been together almost as long as Gwen and Lancelot, and if they broke up, she guessed Lancelot would be too macho to cry. Lancelot replied with something overly masculine and Gwen got angrier.

Eventually, they agreed that they wouldn't break up, so there would be no need to cry.

Merlin switched Titanic over when it ended, and put on Love Actually. Morgana sighed next to him. She pulled his head into her lap and kissed the top of his ear. Merlin, had to admit, he felt a lot better with her here.

He also had to admit he felt like a complete idiot, but that didn't stop the tears from coming.


Arthur, on the other hand, couldn't lie around and cry. He needed to keep active. So he played football with some lads from his course, until his legs ached and he was forced to stop. He dropped down onto the wooden bench, panting heavily.

During the game, he could keep Merlin out of his mind. Now that he was sat watching other's play, he couldn't stop the image of the hurt raven-haired boy from coming to mind. Every time he pictured the sadness on Merlin's face, he wanted to punch himself. He had hurt Merlin, purposely.

He had overreacted, he knew it. He had been drunk and had completely belittled Merlin's birthday present – which, now that Arthur thought about it, had been beautiful. Merlin could have done nothing except give Arthur a smile, and it would have been enough.

All the thing's he'd said to Merlin, what he could remember at least, were horrible. He couldn't come back from this, Merlin would never forgive him. He'd never forgive himself. Merlin may have flirted with a stranger, but Arthur had been overly cruel. He poured some water into his mouth and wiped sweat off his forehead. The sun was warm, summer was fast approaching.

Gwaine glanced over at him from the pitch but didn't move to come over. Gwaine and Percival had heard the argument last night and both of them agreed whole-heartedly that Arthur was in the wrong. Arthur made no effort to persuade them. He let them shout at him and call him a jerk, because he deserved it.

He hadn't only argued with Merlin, he had lied to them about where he had been last night. He hadn't been playing football like he'd claimed, he had been drinking – a lot – with some girls. His exact thoughts were if Merlin can flirt, so can I. And that was possibly the stupidest thought he'd ever had.


If he could stop crying, Merlin would feel better.

But he couldn't.

And if he could stop picturing Merlin's face, Arthur would feel better.

But he couldn't.


"Help me." Arthur begged.

"No." Morgana said.

Arthur sighed and rubbed a fist into his eye until he saw lights on his eyelid. He gripped his phone tighter.

"Please." He whined into the receiver.

"No." She said sternly, "You got into this mess. You can fix it."

"Morgana, look at him right now." Arthur said.

Morgana did as she was told, looking at Merlin over her shoulder, from where she stood in the kitchen. He was lay across the couch, like he had been all day, staring blankly at the TV. While she was watching he sneezed abruptly. He had a blanket wrapped around his shoulders, but he was visibly shaking. Maybe he was getting a cold.

Or maybe he was just heartbroken.

"Is he sad?" Arthur asked quietly.

"Sad isn't the word." Morgana admitted, "But I still won't help you."

"Why?" Arthur asked.

"Because he's my friend."

"I'm your brother."

"Step-brother." Morgana corrected in an undertone.

"Whatever."

"I won't help you. I don't think he wants you to win him back." Morgana whispered, leaning her hip against the kitchen counter.

"Did he say that?" Arthur asked, sadly. If Merlin didn't want him back, he'd let him go. He didn't want to, but he'd have to.

"No but... Look, it's late and he's sad. He's going to figure out who I'm talking to. I don't want him to think I'm on your side."

"There are no sides!" Arthur said, "Even I'm on Merlin's side. My side doesn't exist. My side is for complete morons."

"Well... You're not wrong. I'll talk to him, but I'm not promising anything. I'm not going to help with any big romantic gestures, I am just going to talk to my friend, okay?"

"Thank you, Morgana."

"Whatever." She hung up and placed the phone on the kitchen counter.

Grabbing the tub of Ben & Jerry's ice cream, she walked over to Merlin. He was now watching The Simpsons, but he wasn't laughing at the jokes. She slid onto the couch, forcing Merlin to move his legs. He shuffled into a sitting position and glanced at her.

"Really?" He asked, looking at the ice cream, "Isn't ice cream a bit cliché?"

"What, this?" She asked, pointing to the tub, "It's not for you."

She pulled the tub into her lap and opened it. She ate a huge spoonful of cookie dough ice cream. Merlin laughed, but the happiness didn't reach his eyes. He watched her eat another spoonful before turning back to the TV.

A spoon landed in his lap and he turned back to look at Morgana, her spoon still in her mouth.

"Just eat." She mumbled around the spoon.

"I'm not going to eat away my feelings."

"Who said anything about feelings? I wasn't aware you had to be sad to eat ice cream." Morgana said.

Merlin took a spoonful of ice cream and ate it, feeling it melt in his mouth. He could see why people chose ice cream when they were sad. He wasn't sure how he felt. A mixture of anger, guilt, and sadness swirled in his chest. Right now, sadness was winning out, but later he was sure the guilt would come. He had brought this on himself. Arthur didn't deserve what Merlin had done. He should have told Aaron the truth.

"So, are you and Arthur finished?" Morgana asked, albeit a bit insensitively.

"Oh." Merlin said, swallowing his ice cream, "Is that why you're being so nice to me?"

"I'm always nice to you." Morgana said dismissively, "But are you broken up?"

"I don't know." Merlin admitted, looking away from her, "Maybe."

"Maybe? How can you be maybe broken up?"

"Morgana, I don't want to talk about it." Merlin snapped.

"But you should anyway." Morgana said, unfazed by Merlin's anger. She licked her spoon clean, and reached for the remote. Flicking off the TV, she angled to look at him, waiting for him to talk.

"How will that help?" Merlin asked, avoiding her gaze. He didn't want to talk about Arthur, or Aaron, or himself. He just wanted to be sad and watch movies. Merlin folded his arms across his chest, "Seriously, how will explaining all of it help?"

"Erm..." Morgana hesitated.

"He asked you to check didn't he?" Merlin asked coldly.

"...No."

"Im going to bed." Merlin said, dropping his spoon into the tub and walking off.